{"id":10312,"date":"2016-03-11T16:36:33","date_gmt":"2016-03-11T12:36:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=10312"},"modified":"2016-03-11T16:36:33","modified_gmt":"2016-03-11T12:36:33","slug":"marta-linc-latin-m%c9%99suq","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=10312","title":{"rendered":"Marta L\u0130N\u00c7 — LATIN M\u018f\u015eUQ"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Martha_Lynch\"<\/a>\u00a0 \u00a0Sim-Sim.az-a istinad\u0259n:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Argentinal\u0131 yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 Marta LiaFrigero\u00a0(1925-1985) \u0259s\u0259rl\u0259rini \u201cMarta Lin\u00e7\u201d \u00a0(MARTHA LYNCH) t\u0259x\u0259ll\u00fcs\u00fc il\u0259 yaz\u0131rd\u0131. <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

O, yeddi novella v\u0259 doqquz q\u0131sa hekay\u0259 toplusunun m\u00fc\u0259llifidir.<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 yarad\u0131c\u0131l\u0131q b\u00f6hran\u0131 v\u0259 unudulmaq qorxusu il\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcy\u00fc depressiya n\u0259tic\u0259sind\u0259 \u00f6z ota\u011f\u0131nda silahla intihar etmi\u015fdir.<\/p>\n

<\/strong><\/em>\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u018fvv\u0259l el\u0259 bildim zarafat el\u0259yir, amma yox. \u018ftrafa g\u00f6z g\u0259zdirib a\u00e7ar\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 ver\u0259nd\u0259n sonra bunu dem\u0259y\u0259 \u0259rk etmi\u015fdi. Neylon \u00fczl\u00fck \u00f6rt\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f kreslolarla plastik g\u00fcll\u0259rin aras\u0131nda dayananda \u00fcz-g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc tur\u015fudub \u201cz\u00f6vqs\u00fcz\u201d dedi. \u201cAdi\u201d, yaxud \u201cda\u011f\u0131n\u0131q\u201d s\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259n istifad\u0259 ed\u0259 bil\u0259rdi. Anadan olandan hiss etdiyi yadl\u0131\u011f\u0131 dil\u0259 g\u0259tirdiyi o b\u0259rbad \u015feird\u0259ki kimi\u2026 Amma \u201cz\u00f6vqs\u00fcz\u201d dedi, t\u00fckl\u0259rim biz-biz durdu.
\n<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

B\u0259li. Bu neylon, bu g\u00fcll\u0259r, bu dar \u00e7arpay\u0131 m\u0259nim evim olacaqd\u0131. Neylon \u00f6rt\u00fcy\u0259 v\u0259 eyb\u0259c\u0259r k\u00fclqab\u0131na (mavi \u00e7inid\u0259n, unitaz qapa\u011f\u0131 formas\u0131nda \u2013 guya g\u00fclm\u0259lidi) yara\u015fan \u00fc\u00e7r\u0259ngli t\u00fcl p\u0259rd\u0259nin g\u00fccl\u0259 \u00f6rtd\u00fcy\u00fc p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n ota\u011fa i\u015f\u0131q dolurdu. O, m\u0259tb\u0259x\u0259 bax\u0131b qay\u0131dana q\u0259d\u0259r k\u00fclqab\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6\u015f\u0259kc\u0259l\u0259rin alt\u0131nda gizl\u0259mi\u015fdim, amma d\u00f6\u015f\u0259kc\u0259l\u0259ri qald\u0131r\u0131b onu asanl\u0131qla tapd\u0131. Ondan n\u0259yis\u0259 gizl\u0259tm\u0259k qeyri-m\u00fcmk\u00fcnd\u00fcr. Ri\u015fx\u0259ndl\u0259 niy\u0259 ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 soru\u015fdu\u011fu \u201cJoie de Vivre\u201d kremini. \u015e\u0259xsi m\u0259ktubu. Ya da ki, b\u0259zi g\u00fcnl\u0259r g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn alt\u0131nda yaranan torbalar\u0131. He\u00e7 n\u0259yi. \u201cYax\u015f\u0131, bunu y\u0131\u011f\u0131\u015fd\u0131r, he\u00e7 olmasa, bir d\u0259f\u0259 raz\u0131l\u0131\u011fa g\u0259ldik\u201d. Yen\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc saxlaya bilm\u0259yib \u0259lav\u0259 etdi: \u201cPis deyil\u201d v\u0259 sanki m\u0259n bird\u0259n-bir\u0259 ev\u0259 \u00f6yr\u0259\u015fdim. O andan etibar\u0259n h\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131z yem\u0259k ota\u011f\u0131 (z\u00f6vqs\u00fcz yem\u0259k ota\u011f\u0131), hamam, m\u0259tb\u0259x v\u0259 ki\u00e7ik terrasdan ibar\u0259t idi. P\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259ni g\u00f6rm\u0259k \u00e7\u0259tin idi. Yataq ota\u011f\u0131n\u0131n p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259sini saymasaq, ham\u0131s\u0131 m\u0259nim g\u00f6z s\u0259viyy\u0259md\u0259n yuxar\u0131da yerl\u0259\u015firdi. O p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n qon\u015fu eyvanlar\u0131 v\u0259 binan\u0131n alt\u0131ndak\u0131 s\u0259s-k\u00fcyl\u00fc yolu g\u00f6r\u0259 bilirdim. \u00c7ox \u0259ziyy\u0259t t\u0259l\u0259b etm\u0259y\u0259n v\u0259 onu m\u0259qs\u0259dind\u0259n yay\u0131nd\u0131rmayan \u015feyl\u0259r\u0259 g\u00f6st\u0259rdiyi t\u0259v\u0259cc\u00f6hl\u0259 m\u0259nim d\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131 bu \u00fc\u00e7 z\u00f6vqs\u00fcz yerl\u0259\u015fm\u0259 vahidin\u0259 s\u0131\u011f\u0131\u015fd\u0131rma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Q\u0259hv\u0259yi g\u00f6zl\u0259ri v\u0259 n\u0259 soyuq, n\u0259 d\u0259 yoldan \u00e7\u0131xaran bit\u0259r\u0259f bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131 var idi. D\u00fcmd\u00fcz bir c\u00fct g\u00f6z. O g\u00f6zl\u0259ri h\u0259r r\u0259ftar\u0131mda biruz\u0259 verdiyim ehtirasla sevmi\u015fdim. D\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 onun ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 gic\u0259ll\u0259ndirdiyimi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcm, amma yox. D\u0259lic\u0259sin\u0259 sevilm\u0259yi adi q\u0259bul edirdi. Lap \u0259dal\u0259tsiz olmay\u0131m, o da arada m\u0259nd\u0259n \u00f6tr\u00fc sinov gedirdi. Bir ki\u015fi il\u0259 bir qad\u0131n\u0131n eyni anda eyni n\u00f6qt\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7ataca\u011f\u0131na \u00fcmid etm\u0259k a\u011f\u0131ls\u0131zl\u0131qd\u0131r. B\u0259lk\u0259 bu evi kiray\u0259l\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 m\u0259n d\u0259 \u0259slind\u0259 bunu g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdim. Amma \u00e7ox \u00fcmid etm\u0259y\u0259r\u0259k, qaranl\u0131qda, bo\u015f liftd\u0259 t\u0259k s\u0131x\u0131\u015f\u0131b qald\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bil\u0259n adam\u0131n \u015fikay\u0259tl\u0259nm\u0259yi kimi\u2026 Saat\u0131n z\u0259ngi sizi oyadar, g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259k t\u0259la\u015f\u0131 il\u0259 birlikd\u0259\u2026 Az da olsa, t\u0259hl\u00fck\u0259 hiss ed\u0259rsiniz. Ona gec\u0259l\u0259r qorxaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131 dedim v\u0259 k\u0259lm\u0259l\u0259r otaqda d\u00f6vr edib stolu i\u015f\u0131qland\u0131ran b\u00fcr\u00fcnc\u00fc \u00e7il\u00e7\u0131ra\u011fa ili\u015fdi.<\/p>\n

Orada ya\u015fama\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131m. \u0130st\u0259s\u0259m, \u00e7\u0259tinlik \u00e7\u0259kdiyimi dey\u0259 bil\u0259rdim. Amma adam\u0131 d\u0259li ed\u0259n d\u0259 el\u0259 bu idi: he\u00e7 \u00e7\u0259tinlik d\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kmirdim. Qocalana q\u0259d\u0259r h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 bel\u0259 bir yerd\u0259 davam etdir\u0259 bil\u0259rdiniz. Bu c\u00fcr sevgi insan\u0131 yadla\u015fma\u011fa m\u0259cbur ed\u0259n m\u0259krli d\u00f6vr\u0259dir. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 yadla\u015fma\u011f\u0131 ondan \u00f6yr\u0259nmi\u015fdim.<\/p>\n

\u0130ndiy\u0259 kimi onun q\u0259d\u0259r s\u0259yyar sat\u0131c\u0131ya ox\u015fayan adam g\u00f6rm\u0259mi\u015fdim. \u00dcr\u0259yimd\u0259n\u00a0 daima \u00e7antas\u0131n\u0131 \u0259lin\u0259 s\u0131x\u0131\u015fd\u0131rmaq ke\u00e7irdi, amma yox. \u018fslind\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131 el\u0259 detall\u0131 proqramla\u015fd\u0131r\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ki, s\u0259hv etm\u0259kd\u0259n qorxmayaraq beynimd\u0259 onu izl\u0259y\u0259 bil\u0259rdim. Bu q\u0259d\u0259r vaxt burada, bu q\u0259d\u0259r vaxt ma\u015f\u0131nda, bu q\u0259d\u0259r vaxt s\u0259ninl\u0259 (dem\u0259yin\u0259 az qalm\u0131\u015fd\u0131). Amma yox. He\u00e7 n\u0259y\u0259 baxmayaraq n\u0259zak\u0259tli ki\u015fi idi. \u00d6z\u00fcn\u0259 qalsa, he\u00e7 vaxt \u201cH\u0259l\u0259lik\u201d deyib ged\u0259 bilm\u0259zdi. Onsuz da g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz he\u00e7 n\u0259 g\u00f6rm\u00fcrd\u00fc, bo\u011faza q\u0259d\u0259r m\u00fcnasib\u0259timizd\u0259 batm\u0131\u015fd\u0131q, el\u0259 bir an yeti\u015fmi\u015fdi ki, bu ev, bu z\u00f6vqs\u00fcz g\u00fcll\u0259r, bu zindan p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259l\u0259ri \u00f6z yerind\u0259 ola-ola he\u00e7 kim \u00fczm\u0259kd\u0259n imtina ed\u0259 bilm\u0259zdi.<\/p>\n

Otaqlardak\u0131 n\u0259mi\u015flik qoxusunu aparmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn iki g\u00fcn \u0259ll\u0259\u015fdim. O, n\u0259 d\u0259st\u0259k oldu, n\u0259 etiraz etdi. Sevi\u015fdik. Bacarmad\u0131q. Arada bel\u0259 d\u0259 olur. Onsuz da harda olursunuz olun ilk d\u0259f\u0259 al\u0131nm\u0131r. Yerinizi yad\u0131r\u011fayanda da olmur. Otel otaqlar\u0131nda, onun ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131nda, i\u015f ota\u011f\u0131nda v\u0259 bir d\u0259f\u0259 az qala t\u0259yyar\u0259d\u0259 sevi\u015fmi\u015fdik. Bu d\u0259f\u0259 is\u0259 lap pis idi. Amma g\u00fcnah\u0131 b\u0259d\u0259nimi oldu\u011fundan daha sol\u011fun g\u00f6st\u0259rib onun diqq\u0259tini da\u011f\u0131dan xo\u015fag\u0259lm\u0259z \u00e7\u0259hray\u0131 i\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n boynuna qoydum. S\u0259ssiz, g\u00f6zl\u0259rini yumulu sevi\u015firdi. Onun ba\u015fqa \u015feyl\u0259r x\u0259yal etdiyind\u0259n \u015f\u00fcbh\u0259l\u0259nm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flayanda kefim tamam pozuldu. H\u0259zz almaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn xeyli \u0259ziyy\u0259t \u00e7\u0259kdik. Lakin kiray\u0259 d\u0259 olsa, h\u0259r evin a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6z tarix\u00e7\u0259si olur. Dey\u0259s\u0259n, g\u00fcn i\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00e7\u0259hray\u0131dan maviy\u0259 d\u00f6n\u0259nd\u0259, solanda v\u0259 itib ged\u0259nd\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc xo\u015fb\u0259xt hiss edirdik. Aya\u011fa qalxd\u0131 v\u0259 inc\u0259, z\u0259rif b\u0259d\u0259ni hamama t\u0259r\u0259f s\u00fcz\u00fcld\u00fc. Di\u015fl\u0259rinin aras\u0131ndan fit \u00e7ald\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 e\u015fidirdim, m\u0259n d\u0259 durmaq ist\u0259dim. H\u0259min an \u0259li il\u0259 aya\u011f\u0131m\u0131 tutdu, m\u0259n \u0259riyib ged\u0259n\u0259 kimi a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc, yuxar\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131. G\u00f6r\u0259s\u0259n bir qad\u0131na s\u0131\u011fal \u00e7\u0259k\u0259nd\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fc nec\u0259 bel\u0259 ifad\u0259siz olur? \u018fsl pe\u015f\u0259kar\u0131n etibarl\u0131 \u00fcsulu. Dediyim odur ki, bir-birimiz\u0259 a\u015fiq idik, ilk add\u0131m\u0131 \u00e7oxdan atm\u0131\u015fd\u0131q. \u018fvv\u0259ll\u0259r g\u00f6zl\u0259ri h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 doluxsunmu\u015f olurdu. El\u0259 h\u0259ssas idi ki, el\u0259 bil\u0259rdiniz, \u0259zab \u00e7\u0259kir, amma yox. Sad\u0259c\u0259 bu i\u015fl\u0259r\u0259 \u00e7ox ciddi yana\u015f\u0131r v\u0259 k\u0259skin bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 qad\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6zl\u0259rin\u0259 zill\u0259yirdi.<\/p>\n

Sevm\u0259k, oxumaq v\u0259 \u015f\u0259h\u0259rin \u0259vv\u0259lc\u0259d\u0259n g\u00f6zalt\u0131 etdiyimiz yerl\u0259rind\u0259 \u0259l-\u0259l\u0259 g\u0259zm\u0259k\u2026 Tez-tez sevgisind\u0259n dan\u0131\u015fard\u0131. Allah da bilir ki, b\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar adama \u00e7ox xo\u015f g\u0259lirdi. Onsuz da xo\u015f duy\u011fularla ba\u011fl\u0131 he\u00e7 bir problemimiz yox idi. Onunla bir daha sevi\u015f\u0259 bil\u0259rdim, amma vaxt qalmam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Geyindiyini, arxa k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259y\u0259 a\u00e7\u0131lan p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259y\u0259 baxd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Evi o k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259d\u0259dir. Y\u0259ni \u0259sl evi. Orada n\u0259 neylon \u00f6rt\u00fckl\u0259r, n\u0259 d\u0259 unitaz qapa\u011f\u0131 \u015f\u0259klind\u0259 g\u00fcl\u00fcnc k\u00fclqab\u0131lar var idi. \u018fsl evi. Buran\u0131 kiray\u0259l\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 yerin uy\u011fun olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 dedim, evin\u0259 \u00e7ox yax\u0131n idi, bir ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u00f6ng\u0259 o yanda. El\u0259 bildim, m\u0259niml\u0259 raz\u0131la\u015facaq, amma yox.<\/p>\n

\u201cProblemimiz m\u0259saf\u0259 il\u0259 ba\u011fl\u0131 deyil ki, sevgilim\u201d, \u2013 dey\u0259 izah etdi.<\/p>\n

N\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r soyuqqanl\u0131 olsa da, ona v\u0259ziyy\u0259tin normal olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6st\u0259rm\u0259k ist\u0259dim. Cavab\u0131 m\u0259ntiqli idi: Onsuz da sevgi he\u00e7 vaxt normal v\u0259ziyy\u0259t hesab olunmay\u0131b.<\/p>\n

\u201cEvind\u0259n iki d\u00f6ng\u0259 o yandad\u0131r\u201d,- israr etdim. \u018fslind\u0259 problemimiz m\u0259saf\u0259 deyildi. Yoxsa, uzaql\u0131q d\u0259r\u0259c\u0259sin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 \u0259h\u0259miyy\u0259tini itirdiyini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fcm? El\u0259dirs\u0259, bel\u0259 gets\u0259, lap evinin qonaq ota\u011f\u0131nda, ya da hovuz q\u0131ra\u011f\u0131nda sevi\u015f\u0259c\u0259kdik (evinin qurulu\u015fundan x\u0259b\u0259rdar idim, \u0259\u015fyalar\u0131n yerini, kitablar\u0131n d\u00fcz\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fc, yatd\u0131\u011f\u0131 ota\u011f\u0131, ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259 canland\u0131ra bilirdim). Dem\u0259li,\u00a0 biz sevi\u015f\u0259nd\u0259 arvad\u0131 \u00e7ini d\u00fcz\u0259ld\u0259c\u0259k. Ya da ba\u015fqa \u0259l i\u015fi il\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful olacaq. Deyil\u0259n\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259, \u0259s\u0259bi sakitl\u0259\u015fdirir. Bir d\u0259 yox dedim, amma s\u0259sim z\u0259if \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131, \u00e7\u00fcnki onun yan\u0131nda h\u0259r \u015feyi itirm\u0259kd\u0259n qorxurdum (m\u0259nim olmayan \u201ch\u0259r \u015fey\u201d, ya da h\u0259r olmayan \u015fey). Onun yan\u0131nda h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 g\u00fccs\u00fcz olur v\u0259 h\u0259r \u015feyd\u0259n \u015f\u00fcbh\u0259l\u0259nirdim.<\/p>\n

\u201cYax\u015f\u0131, onda bu evi tutaq\u201d \u2013 dedim.<\/p>\n

M\u0259n\u0259 \u0259vv\u0259lc\u0259 a\u00e7arlar\u0131, sonra \u00e7i\u00e7\u0259kl\u0259ri, z\u0259if i\u015f\u0131qda q\u0131sa sevi\u015fm\u0259ni v\u0259 \u0259sl evinir\u0259va g\u00f6rd\u00fc. Vicdan\u0131n\u0131 oyatmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u0259sl evini g\u00f6st\u0259rdim, amma yox. \u018fn diqq\u0259t\u00e7\u0259k\u0259nxasiyy\u0259ti: \u0259xlaqi unutqanl\u0131q;\u015f\u0259xsiyy\u0259tin ikil\u0259\u015fm\u0259si d\u0259 var idi.\u00a0 \u018fli il\u0259 \u00e7\u0131lpaq b\u0259d\u0259nimi ox\u015fayanda nam\u0259lum \u00fcslublu binan\u0131n ya\u015f\u0131l\u0131mtraq fasad\u0131na baxark\u0259n az qala m\u0259ni d\u0259 yoluxduracaqd\u0131. Qaraj qap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131, birinci m\u0259rt\u0259b\u0259d\u0259ki p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259nin bir hiss\u0259sini v\u0259 da\u015f hasar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u0259 bilirdim. S\u00fcr\u0259tl\u0259 h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259t edirdi, sanki poliqondayd\u0131. Bzz, dan, dun\u2026 Sa\u011f k\u00fcncd\u0259 yoxa \u00e7\u0131x\u0131r, sonra bird\u0259n peyda olurdu. Ba\u015f\u0131 g\u0259nc bir romal\u0131n\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131na b\u0259nz\u0259yirdi, sa\u00e7lar\u0131 q\u0131vr\u0131m idi, qa\u015flar\u0131n\u0131n aras\u0131ndak\u0131 s\u00fcm\u00fck bir balaca \u00f6n\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Bzz, dan\u2026 604 n\u00f6mr\u0259li evin p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259si, alt\u0131nc\u0131 m\u0259rt\u0259b\u0259, lap Kennedi kimi, amma n\u0259 izdiham var, n\u0259 M\u0259rk\u0259zi K\u0259\u015ffiyyat \u0130dar\u0259sinin agentl\u0259ri, n\u0259 d\u0259 Ceki il\u0259 kobud r\u0259ftar ed\u0259n polisl\u0259r; yaz\u0131q Ceki vurulmamaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn s\u00fcr\u00fcn\u0259-s\u00fcr\u00fcn\u0259 uzaqla\u015f\u0131r; amma burada n\u0259 Ceki var, n\u0259\u00a0 MK\u0130, n\u0259 d\u0259 izdiham; birc\u0259 polis bel\u0259 yoxdur. Ancaq ikimiz, h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259ki kimi\u2026 Sevgi adl\u0131 bu say\u0131qlamada ancaq ikimiz var idik. T\u0259bii ki, bu sevgiydi, sonra bir qad\u0131n\u0131n bir ki\u015fini\u00a0 t\u00fcf\u0259ngl\u0259 ni\u015fan almas\u0131. Ala bil\u0259rdim, p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n\u2026 Amma yox. Yen\u0259 ona bax\u0131rd\u0131m, soyuq du\u015fun t\u0259siri il\u0259 sakitl\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdi, h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259tsiz idi. Ona bax\u0131rd\u0131m \u2013 bir daha g\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259ki t\u00fck\u00fcrp\u0259dici bax\u0131\u015f\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm, n\u0259 sevgi, n\u0259 d\u0259 k\u0259d\u0259r. P\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259md\u0259n g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u0259n ya\u015f\u0131l fasadl\u0131 ev \u00fcr\u0259yimi s\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131, ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Boyunba\u011f\u0131n\u0131 taxd\u0131, bej r\u0259ngli k\u00f6yn\u0259yini geydi. Stulda \u0259yl\u0259\u015fib seyr\u0259l\u0259n qara sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 s\u0259liq\u0259 il\u0259 darad\u0131. Yata\u011f\u0131n ucunda oturdu\u011fumu xat\u0131rlay\u0131ram, \u00e7\u0131lpaq v\u0259 b\u0259db\u0259xt idim. N\u0259 ed\u0259c\u0259yimi bilmirdim. Yen\u0259 m\u0259ni s\u0131\u011fallama\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131. H\u0259r \u015fey onun planla\u015fd\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131 kimi oldu: \u00e7ox t\u0259bii v\u0259 a\u011fr\u0131l\u0131. H\u0259r g\u00fcn girdiyimiz g\u00fcnah \u2013 \u0259g\u0259r g\u00fcnah idis\u0259 \u2013 evinin d\u00fcz qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda da, And da\u011flar\u0131n\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131nda da eyni g\u00fcnah idi. On \u00fc\u00e7 min kilometr uzaqda ets\u0259n bel\u0259, g\u00fcnah g\u00fcnahd\u0131r. Amma yox.<\/p>\n

Son sevi\u015fm\u0259l\u0259rimiz nisb\u0259t\u0259n yax\u015f\u0131yd\u0131, bu h\u0259yata \u00f6yr\u0259\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. S\u0259h\u0259r yem\u0259yini \u015f\u0131q bir barda yeyirdim. Y\u0259qin tezlikl\u0259 ba\u011flanacaqd\u0131, \u00e7\u00fcnki m\u0259nd\u0259n ba\u015fqa m\u00fc\u015ft\u0259ril\u0259ri yox idi. M\u0259n\u0259 h\u00f6rm\u0259tl\u0259 \u201cxan\u0131m\u201d deyirdil\u0259r, m\u0259n d\u0259 l\u0259zz\u0259tl\u0259 q\u0259hv\u0259mi qurtumlay\u0131rd\u0131m. Naharda onun i\u015fd\u0259n g\u0259lm\u0259yini g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdim; arada z\u0259ng edir, s\u0259simi e\u015fid\u0259nd\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259kd\u0259n g\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fc. Bir m\u00fcdd\u0259t \u0259vv\u0259l bu g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f \u00fcmidverici s\u0259sl\u0259nirdi, amma yox. Onun evind\u0259n iki d\u00f6ng\u0259 o yandak\u0131 ev\u0259 k\u00f6\u00e7m\u0259yiml\u0259 (yataq ota\u011f\u0131 il\u0259, hamamla, m\u0259tb\u0259xl\u0259, m\u0259ni bu \u00e7arxa he\u00e7 bir xatir\u0259nin bacara bilm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259yi \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 s\u0131x ba\u011flayan b\u00fct\u00fcn \u0259\u015fyalarla) h\u0259yat\u0131ndak\u0131 m\u00f6vqeyim d\u0259qiql\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdi. Ham\u0131s\u0131 bir a\u011f\u0131zdan \u201cbax buradasan\u201d deyirdi.\u00a0 Bir g\u00fcn \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 dedi: \u201cBax burdasan, evin\u0259 k\u00f6\u00e7m\u00fcs\u0259n\u201d. Dem\u0259li, m\u0259nim burada olma\u011f\u0131m onu arxay\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131rm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Bir ne\u00e7\u0259 g\u00fcn sonra qap\u0131\u00e7\u0131 m\u0259niml\u0259 salamla\u015fma\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131. Bizim d\u0259hlizin o biri ucundak\u0131 qad\u0131nlardan daha qoca, dinm\u0259z bir qad\u0131n k\u0259\u015ff etdim; ham\u0131n\u0131n bu tikilid\u0259 qalmaq s\u0259b\u0259bl\u0259ri eyni idi.<\/p>\n

Evin g\u00f6rk\u0259mini yax\u015f\u0131la\u015fd\u0131rma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Q\u0259rib\u0259dir ki, g\u00f6z\u0259 batan b\u0259zi detallar yerind\u0259 qalsa da, vaxt ke\u00e7dikc\u0259 ev d\u00fcz\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131. Dem\u0259k olar ki, z\u00f6qvs\u00fcz \u0259\u015fyalar\u0131 bel\u0259 g\u00f6z\u00fcm g\u00f6rm\u00fcrd\u00fc. \u00dcst\u00fcnd\u0259 d\u0259li kimi sevi\u015fdiyimiz divan\u0131n neylon \u00f6rt\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fc s\u00f6k\u0259 bilmi\u015fdim. \u0130ki kreslonun yerini d\u0259yi\u015fdirdim, b\u0259z\u0259kli \u015forba kasas\u0131n\u0131 ortal\u0131qdan g\u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fcm.<\/p>\n

H\u0259r g\u00fcn qarad\u0259rili hindu qad\u0131ndan g\u00fcll\u0259r al\u0131rd\u0131m, onu g\u00fcnd\u0259 t\u0259z\u0259l\u0259n\u0259n g\u00fcll\u0259r\u0259 \u00f6yr\u0259\u015fdirm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Bunun f\u0259rqin\u0259 var\u0131b-varmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259qiq bilmirdim, amma g\u00fcll\u0259r israrla bir-birini \u0259v\u0259zl\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 davam edirdi: \u0259vv\u0259l a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131r, sonra solur, ax\u0131rda \u00f6ld\u00fcrd\u00fcl\u0259r. Bir d\u0259f\u0259 yataqda olanda q\u0259fil \u201cEl\u0259 bilm\u0259 ki, g\u00fcll\u0259rini g\u00f6rm\u00fcr\u0259m\u201d dedi.<\/p>\n

P\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n onun gedi\u015f-g\u0259li\u015fini pusma\u011f\u0131 \u00f6yr\u0259ndim. Ma\u015f\u0131n giri\u015f qap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n a\u011fz\u0131ndayd\u0131: B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 evd\u0259dir. Ma\u015f\u0131n yoxdur. Y\u0259qin gedib. M\u0259niml\u0259 olanda ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131\u00a0 evinin k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259si il\u0259 k\u0259si\u015f\u0259n k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259nin sonunda saxlay\u0131rd\u0131. Bir d\u0259f\u0259 ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131n problem yaratd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 etiraf etmi\u015fdi. Amma yox. \u00c7\u0131xanda he\u00e7 kiml\u0259 qar\u015f\u0131la\u015fm\u0131rd\u0131m ki\u2026 Bizi he\u00e7 kim bir yerd\u0259 g\u00f6rm\u0259mi\u015fdi. H\u0259ft\u0259 sonlar\u0131 ad\u0259t\u0259n \u0259zab-\u0259ziyy\u0259tl\u0259 ke\u00e7irdi. C\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00fcn\u00fc ikindi \u00e7a\u011f\u0131ndan sonra yoxa \u00e7\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131 (\u00e7\u00fcnki bu \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 ya\u015fayanlar c\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00fcnl\u0259ri bir n\u00f6v manyakal, yoluxucu s\u00fcr\u00fc \u0259hval\u0131n\u0131n t\u0259siri il\u0259 dirilirdil\u0259r). M\u0259n d\u0259 bu iki g\u00fcn\u00fc bacard\u0131\u011f\u0131m q\u0259d\u0259r doldurma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131m \u2013 \u0259vv\u0259ll\u0259r istirah\u0259t g\u00fcnl\u0259rini yar\u0131s\u00fcrg\u00fcnd\u0259 ya\u015famaq m\u0259ni d\u0259li edirdi. S\u00f6hb\u0259tl\u0259\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 adam axtard\u0131m, dostla\u015fd\u0131m, yem\u0259k bi\u015firib \u00f6z\u00fcm kimi t\u0259nha adamlarla m\u00fcnasib\u0259t qurdum. Arabir evim\u0259 bir-biril\u0259rin\u0259 a\u015fiq \u2013 v\u0259 h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 xo\u015fb\u0259xt \u2013 bir c\u00fctl\u00fck g\u0259lirdi. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 t\u0259k ya\u015fayan qad\u0131n\u0131n evind\u0259 dinclikd\u0259n daha \u00e7ox xo\u015fb\u0259xtliyin \u0259ksini g\u00f6rm\u0259k onlar\u0131 sakitl\u0259\u015fdirirdi. C\u00fcm\u0259 gec\u0259l\u0259rimi, uzun \u015f\u0259nb\u0259l\u0259rimi, isti, soyuq bazarlar\u0131m\u0131 dib\u0259-dib doldururdum. Kazaklar kimi i\u00e7ir, \u00e7\u0259kirdim. Bazar s\u0259h\u0259rl\u0259ri g\u00f6zl\u0259rim\u0259, \u015fi\u015fmi\u015f g\u00f6z qapaqlar\u0131ma baxan kimi yenid\u0259n yata\u011fa qay\u0131d\u0131rd\u0131m, ka\u015f ki, \u00f6l\u0259ydim deyirdim. El\u0259 bu vaxt qula\u011f\u0131ma kimins\u0259 oxudu\u011fu mahn\u0131, bir itin arams\u0131z h\u00fcr\u00fc\u015fm\u0259l\u0259ri, bir g\u00f6y\u0259r\u00e7inin qurultusu, k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259 s\u0259sl\u0259ri, siqnallar g\u0259lirdi. \u015e\u0259nb\u0259 g\u00fcnl\u0259ri onun \u201cail\u0259 adam\u0131\u201d oldu\u011funu da bel\u0259c\u0259 \u00f6yr\u0259ndim. M\u00fc\u0259lliml\u0259rini raz\u0131 salma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan a\u011f\u0131ll\u0131 \u015fagird kimi v\u0259zif\u0259l\u0259rini bir-bir yerin\u0259 yetirirdi. \u018fynind\u0259 mavi maykas\u0131 evinin pill\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259n enm\u0259yini izl\u0259yirdim, s\u0259rxo\u015f adam\u0131n b\u00fcdr\u0259m\u0259sini xat\u0131rladan \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259m\u0259xsus yeri\u015fl\u0259 ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131na t\u0259r\u0259f gedirdi. P\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259m\u0259 t\u0259r\u0259f baxs\u0131n dey\u0259 \u00e7abalay\u0131rd\u0131m, amma yox. Telepatiya, parapsixologiya, h\u0259r \u015feyi k\u00f6m\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131m: Ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 qald\u0131r, qald\u0131r, s\u0259ni izl\u0259diyimi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn, bax, buradayam. He\u00e7vaxt dedikl\u0259rimi etm\u0259di. Bir g\u00fcn u\u015faqlar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Ba\u015f\u0131, burnu \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 ox\u015fayan s\u0259kkiz ya\u015fl\u0131 o\u011flan. D\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc des\u0259m, he\u00e7 kim s\u0259kkiz ya\u015fl\u0131 o\u011flan\u0131n burnunu bu m\u0259saf\u0259d\u0259n g\u00f6r\u0259 bilm\u0259z. Yen\u0259 d\u0259 and i\u00e7\u0259 bil\u0259r\u0259m ki, eynil\u0259 onun sa\u00e7lar\u0131, onun burnu idi. Arabir g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259n d\u00f6rd u\u015faqdan ancaq burnu ona ox\u015fayan o\u011flan kefimi pozurdu.<\/p>\n

\u018fvv\u0259ll\u0259r d\u0259 demi\u015fdim ki, bir ki\u015fid\u0259n imtina ed\u0259 bil\u0259rsiniz, amma u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n\u0131z ola bil\u0259c\u0259k birind\u0259n \u0259sla. Viskimi almaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ota\u011fa qay\u0131danda \u00fcr\u0259yim bulan\u0131rd\u0131, yen\u0259 d\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc \u0259l\u0259 ald\u0131m, h\u0259min h\u0259ft\u0259 sonunu b\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 d\u00f6rd mininci d\u0259f\u0259 beynimd\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr-qoy etdim: \u201cStatus\u201dda g\u00fcnorta yem\u0259yi, \u201cPacifico\u201dda film, \u201cLa Sueca\u201dda \u00e7ay, Marianan\u0131n evind\u0259 ax\u015fam yem\u0259yi \u2013 bir vaxtlar Mariana da onun m\u0259\u015fuq\u0259si imi\u015f. \u00d6z-\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 eyni inciklik, eyni d\u0259lilik bir add\u0131m yax\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131mdad\u0131r deyirdim. Amma Mariana bel\u0259 evd\u0259 ya\u015famay\u0131b, t\u00fcf\u0259ngl\u0259 onu ni\u015fan almay\u0131b. M\u0259nim f\u0259rqim bu idi v\u0259 bu f\u0259rqi canla-ba\u015fla m\u00fcdafi\u0259 etm\u0259y\u0259 haz\u0131r idim. Mariana sad\u0259c\u0259 x\u0259b\u0259rdarl\u0131q idi. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc saxlaya bilm\u0259dim v\u0259 t\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259nin yan\u0131na qay\u0131td\u0131m. Bu t\u0259sad\u00fcf yerin\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc? \u015e\u0259nb\u0259nin bazarla m\u00fcqayis\u0259d\u0259 daha \u201cbo\u015f\u201d g\u00fcn oldu\u011funu k\u0259\u015ff etmi\u015fdim, bel\u0259c\u0259, bazar g\u00fcn\u00fcn\u0259 d\u00f6zm\u0259k daha asan olacaqd\u0131. He\u00e7 olmasa bazar ert\u0259si s\u0259h\u0259r g\u0259l\u0259n z\u0259ng\u0259, d\u0259st\u0259kd\u0259n onun s\u0259sini e\u015fitm\u0259y\u0259 az qal\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n

El\u0259 bilmi\u015fdik, bir problem, \u00e7\u0259tinlikyaranacaq, amma yox. Qap\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b duruxmaq, o nazik b\u0259d\u0259n\u0259 toxunmaq, \u00e7ox sevdiyim g\u00f6zl\u0259rini, sa\u00e7\u0131n\u0131n inadkar q\u0131vr\u0131mlar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rm\u0259k, t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcms\u00fcz \u00f6p\u00fc\u015f, bir d\u0259, \u0259vv\u0259l d\u0259, sonra da n\u0259fis \u00f6p\u00fc\u015fl\u0259r. H\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 f\u00f6vq\u0259lad\u0259 idi. Yalan demir\u0259m, \u00f6p\u00fc\u015fl\u0259ri n\u0259fis idi. Q\u0131rx s\u0259kkiz saatl\u0131q quraql\u0131q ba\u015flamam\u0131\u015fdan \u0259vv\u0259lki c\u00fcm\u0259 gec\u0259sind\u0259n qopub g\u0259l\u0259n uzun \u00f6p\u00fc\u015fl\u0259r. Onlar\u0131 h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 unutmam\u0131\u015fam. Ya da \u00fcz\u00fc d\u0259niz\u0259, sahilin quru, \u00e7\u0131nq\u0131ll\u0131 yerl\u0259rin\u0259 g\u0259zintiy\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xard\u0131q, Yaxud Barranka ba\u011f\u00e7alar\u0131na gedib \u0259ll\u0259rini fontanda yuyan \u00e7\u0131lpaq qad\u0131n\u0131 ziyar\u0259t ed\u0259 bil\u0259rdik. Arada b\u0259zi v\u0259rdi\u015fl\u0259r,\u00a0 yax\u015f\u0131 \u0259n\u0259n\u0259l\u0259r yaratma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131q. Onun kitablar\u0131 s\u0131\u011fal \u00e7\u0259kirmi\u015f kimi v\u0259r\u0259ql\u0259m\u0259sin\u0259, alman n\u0259z\u0259riyy\u0259\u00e7il\u0259rin\u0259 nifr\u0259t etm\u0259sin\u0259, \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u0131n he\u00e7 bir n\u00f6v\u00fcn\u0259 maraq duymamas\u0131na, penc\u0259yini stulun ba\u015f\u0131na sanki t\u0259sad\u00fcf\u0259n ke\u00e7irm\u0259sin\u0259 b\u0259nz\u0259y\u0259n v\u0259rdi\u015fl\u0259r. Bunlar \u00e7ox xo\u015fuma g\u0259lirdi.<\/p>\n

M\u0259h\u0259ll\u0259mizin \u0259n ucuz b\u0259rb\u0259ri Rut sa\u00e7\u0131m\u0131 adi evimin ab-havas\u0131na uy\u011fun bururdu. O, sa\u00e7 d\u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fcm\u00fcn f\u0259rqin\u0259 varm\u0131rd\u0131, amma payla\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z m\u0259kanda ucuz buruqlar\u0131n k\u00f6lg\u0259sind\u0259 uzanan hicran d\u0259qiq\u0259l\u0259rini sevirdi. \u00c7ox ke\u00e7m\u0259di ki, bel\u0259 ya\u015famaqdan \u0259vv\u0259ll\u0259r s\u0131nad\u0131\u011f\u0131m h\u0259yat t\u0259rzl\u0259rind\u0259n daha \u00e7ox z\u00f6vq ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 hiss etdim. \u018fn pisi d\u0259 odur ki, bu hiss vaxtla ke\u00e7\u0259n deyildi. Onun n\u0259 vaxtsa a\u011fl\u0131n\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131na y\u0131\u011faca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 z\u0259nn ed\u0259 bil\u0259rsiniz, amma yox. M\u00fct\u0259madi \u015f\u0259kild\u0259, vaxtl\u0131-vaxt\u0131nda g\u0259lib gedirdi: i\u015f yerind\u0259 filan q\u0259d\u0259r, evd\u0259 filan q\u0259d\u0259r, bizim otaqda filan q\u0259d\u0259r. M\u0259niml\u0259 \u00e7ox yox, c\u0259mi \u00fc\u00e7 saat ke\u00e7irirdi. Birlikd\u0259 yat\u0131rd\u0131q, \u0259n yax\u015f\u0131 m\u00fcnasib\u0259tl\u0259rin yatark\u0259n quruldu\u011funu onda \u00f6yr\u0259nmi\u015fdim. Yataq bizim qoxumuzu ist\u0259yirdi. Lakin s\u00fcrg\u00fcn \u015f\u0259nb\u0259 g\u00fcnl\u0259rinin birind\u0259 s\u0259h\u0259r tezd\u0259n ya\u011f\u0131\u015f t\u00f6km\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131. Onun evin\u0259 girm\u0259yini, sonra \u00e7\u0131xma\u011f\u0131n\u0131, u\u015faqlar\u0131n ma\u015f\u0131na dolu\u015fma\u011f\u0131n\u0131, arvad\u0131 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn qap\u0131 a\u00e7ma\u011f\u0131n\u0131 izl\u0259dim. B\u0259zi \u015feyl\u0259r\u0259 uzaqdan baxanda daha yax\u015f\u0131 ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrs\u00fcn\u00fcz: m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, \u00fcr\u0259yinin s\u0131x\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131 h\u0259qiq\u0259t idi, v\u0259zif\u0259sin\u0259 duydu\u011fu v\u0259fa da. D\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc deyir\u0259m, amma bunlar m\u00fctl\u0259q vacib deyildi. Bu adama bir can borclu oldu\u011fumu da ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcm. Sa\u011f olsun, sa\u011f oldu\u011fu m\u00fcdd\u0259td\u0259 ona minn\u0259tdar olacaqd\u0131m. Yen\u0259 d\u0259 m\u0259niml\u0259 birg\u0259 ke\u00e7irm\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 \u00fcst\u00fcnl\u00fck verdiyi anlar var idi. Onda t\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n \u00fcr\u0259yimin \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fc, ya\u015famamaq ist\u0259yi, mane\u0259l\u0259r v\u0259 taq\u0259tsizlik ba\u015flay\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Arvad\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6n oturaca\u011fa oturtdu, sonra u\u015faqlar\u0131 yerb\u0259yer el\u0259di. Y\u0259qin g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc bir m\u00fcdd\u0259tlik yay\u0131nd\u0131rm\u0131\u015fam, \u00e7\u00fcnki bir d\u0259 baxanda ma\u015f\u0131n geri qay\u0131tm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Qad\u0131n g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u00fcrd\u00fc, ancaq u\u015faqlar var idi. Burunlu o\u011flanla atas\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259ki \u00e7ar\u0259sizliyi eynil\u0259 \u0259ks etdir\u0259n c\u0131l\u0131z q\u0131z. Onun \u00e7iynind\u0259 al\u0131\u015f-veri\u015f torbalar\u0131 il\u0259 ma\u015f\u0131na minm\u0259yini, ev\u0259 qay\u0131tma\u011f\u0131n\u0131, \u00fc\u00e7 karton qutunu \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 y\u0131\u011fma\u011f\u0131n\u0131, gedib t\u0259z\u0259 torbalar g\u0259tirm\u0259yini seyr etdim. O, t\u0259sviri t\u0259hrif etm\u0259k \u0259v\u0259zin\u0259 daha da n\u0259z\u0259r\u0259\u00e7arpan v\u0259 ayd\u0131n g\u00f6st\u0259r\u0259n, r\u0259ngli fotoya \u00e7evir\u0259n s\u0259xav\u0259tli \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259nin arxas\u0131ndak\u0131 h\u0259\u015f\u0259rat\u0131 nec\u0259 m\u00fc\u015fahid\u0259 edirdis\u0259, m\u0259n d\u0259 n\u0259f\u0259simi tutub onu el\u0259c\u0259 izl\u0259dim. Onsuz bir ziyaf\u0259t\u0259 ged\u0259nd\u0259 xat\u0131rlad\u0131\u011f\u0131m q\u0259d\u0259ril\u0259 h\u0259min \u015f\u0259nb\u0259 g\u00fcn\u00fc q\u0259lbim s\u0131nd\u0131, o \u015f\u0259nb\u0259 f\u0259rqli idi. \u0130st\u0259r-ist\u0259m\u0259z m\u0259ni \u0259n \u00e7ox kar\u0131xd\u0131ran\u0131n q\u0259rib\u0259 burunlu o\u011flan u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 oldu\u011funu dey\u0259c\u0259kdim, onun \u015feytani v\u0259 saf x\u00fcsusiyy\u0259tl\u0259rini da\u015f\u0131yan o\u011flu. M\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, h\u0259min u\u015faq onun \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00f6r\u0259c\u0259kdi.<\/p>\n

\u018fsl problem is\u0259 bazar ert\u0259si qay\u0131danda \u00f6p\u00fc\u015fl\u0259rind\u0259n \u0259vv\u0259lki kimi xo\u015flanma\u011f\u0131m idi. El\u0259 bil\u0259rsiniz ki, hiss etdiyim inciklikd\u0259n v\u0259 ya b\u00f6y\u00fcd\u00fcc\u00fc \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259d\u0259n izl\u0259diyim h\u0259min s\u0259hn\u0259d\u0259n sonra n\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259yi\u015fdi. Amma yox. Bunlar\u0131 saymasaq, h\u0259min xo\u015fb\u0259xt bazar ert\u0259sind\u0259n sonra h\u0259ft\u0259 sonunu qorxu i\u00e7ind\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259dim v\u0259 he\u00e7 p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n baxmad\u0131m. Ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131n\u0131 evinin qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda dayand\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 t\u0259s\u0259vv\u00fcr etdim v\u0259 yen\u0259 incidim. \u00c7amadan\u0131m\u0131 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb \u201cBel\u0259 daha yax\u015f\u0131 olacaq, sevgilim\u201d dedim. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 ba\u015fqa yol se\u00e7m\u0259li idim, amma yox. P\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n \u0259yildim, onun ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131n\u0131 s\u0259kiy\u0259 yax\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131rma\u011f\u0131n\u0131 seyr etdim. M\u0259n\u0259 m\u00f6ht\u0259\u015f\u0259m h\u0259zz ya\u015fayadan o nazik b\u0259d\u0259ni s\u00fczd\u00fcm. Sonra bir ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u0259st paltar g\u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fcm, iry\u0259nc \u0259\u015fyalar\u0131 yerind\u0259 saxlad\u0131m, qap\u0131n\u0131 q\u0131f\u0131llad\u0131m v\u0259 \u0259l \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 saxlad\u0131\u011f\u0131m sevgilimin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc bir d\u0259 g\u00f6rm\u0259dim.<\/p>\n

T\u0259rc\u00fcm\u0259:\u00a0\u0130lah\u0259 \u018fkb\u0259r<\/p>\n

<\/span><\/strong>sim-sim.az<\/p>\n

\n

\n

\n

Yaz\u0131ya 572 d\u0259f\u0259 bax\u0131l\u0131b<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0 \u00a0Sim-Sim.az-a istinad\u0259n: Argentinal\u0131 yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 Marta LiaFrigero\u00a0(1925-1985) \u0259s\u0259rl\u0259rini \u201cMarta Lin\u00e7\u201d \u00a0(MARTHA LYNCH) t\u0259x\u0259ll\u00fcs\u00fc il\u0259 yaz\u0131rd\u0131. O, yeddi novella v\u0259 doqquz q\u0131sa hekay\u0259 toplusunun m\u00fc\u0259llifidir. Yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 yarad\u0131c\u0131l\u0131q b\u00f6hran\u0131 v\u0259 unudulmaq qorxusu il\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcy\u00fc depressiya n\u0259tic\u0259sind\u0259 \u00f6z ota\u011f\u0131nda silahla intihar etmi\u015fdir. \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u018fvv\u0259l el\u0259 bildim zarafat el\u0259yir, amma yox. \u018ftrafa g\u00f6z g\u0259zdirib a\u00e7ar\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 ver\u0259nd\u0259n […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[16,3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10312"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=10312"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10312\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10314,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10312\/revisions\/10314"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=10312"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=10312"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=10312"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}