{"id":10982,"date":"2016-04-27T23:44:33","date_gmt":"2016-04-27T18:44:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=10982"},"modified":"2016-04-27T23:44:33","modified_gmt":"2016-04-27T18:44:33","slug":"tural-sahab-onun-adi-elyanora-deyil","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=10982","title":{"rendered":"Tural Sahab – Onun ad\u0131 Elyanora deyil"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"tural<\/a>(hekay\u0259)<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Onun ad\u0131 il\u0259…<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

He\u00e7 n\u0259 bilmir\u0259m. N\u0259 yazacam, nec\u0259 yazmal\u0131yam – he\u00e7 n\u0259. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc s\u00f6zl\u0259r\u0259 v\u0259 onun sahibin\u0259 \u0259man\u0259t edib, h\u0259rfl\u0259rin d\u00fcnyas\u0131na yolculu\u011fa \u00e7\u0131x\u0131ram. Hekay\u0259 dan\u0131\u015fmaq yeni axma\u011fa ba\u015flayan bir \u00e7ay kimidi. \u00dcr\u0259yin qaynay\u0131r, ancaq bilmirs\u0259n, kimin hekay\u0259sini dan\u0131\u015facaqsan – hans\u0131 yolla axacaqsan. Bu zaman iki yolun olur. Ya \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc ona \u0259man\u0259t edib, yola \u00e7\u0131xacaqsan, ya da \u00f6z \u00fcr\u0259yind\u0259 bo\u011fulacaqsan…<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Onu ilk d\u0259f\u0259 bir yay s\u0259h\u0259rind\u0259 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. S\u0259h\u0259r dey\u0259nd\u0259 ki, t\u0259xmin\u0259n saat on bir olard\u0131. Yayd\u0131 , ancaq hava pay\u0131zdak\u0131 kimi soyuq v\u0259 k\u00f6vr\u0259kdi. B\u0259li, Tanr\u0131 bizl\u0259r\u0259 bu isti yay g\u00fcn\u00fcnd\u0259 bir pay\u0131z havas\u0131 h\u0259diyy\u0259 etmi\u015fdi. Daha d\u00fcn\u0259n istid\u0259n q\u0131vranan\u00a0 yarpaqlar, otlar bu g\u00fcn \u00fc\u015f\u00fcy\u00fcr, pay\u0131z\u0131n g\u0259ldiyini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcb, \u00f6z \u00f6l\u00fcm n\u0259\u011fm\u0259l\u0259rini oxuyurdular. Havan\u0131n s\u0259rin oldu\u011funu f\u00fcrs\u0259t bilib g\u0259zintiy\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. M\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn t\u0259til deyil\u0259n bir s\u00f6z yoxdu. Dem\u0259k olar ki, h\u0259r g\u00fcn tezd\u0259n oyan\u0131r, balaca kitab d\u00fckan\u0131m\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131ram. \u0130\u015f\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259rk\u0259n yolumun \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 olan \u015firniyyat d\u00fckan\u0131ndan iki simit al\u0131r, d\u00fckan\u0131mda g\u00f6z\u0259l bir \u00e7ay d\u0259ml\u0259yib, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 bir yolda\u015f da tap\u0131b \u00e7ay\u0131m\u0131 i\u00e7ir\u0259m. Kitablar\u0131n aras\u0131nda olmaq d\u00fcnyan\u0131 g\u0259zm\u0259kd\u0259n daha g\u00f6z\u0259ldi. H\u0259r g\u00fcn yeni kitablar g\u0259lir v\u0259 m\u0259n onlardan birini g\u00fcn\u0259\u015f batana q\u0259d\u0259r bitirir\u0259m. Dedim ax\u0131, o g\u00fcn – onu\u00a0 g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcm g\u00fcn hava s\u0259rin idi. Qulaqc\u0131qlar\u0131m\u0131 tax\u0131b yol gedir, bu h\u00fcnd\u00fcr binalar\u0131n yar\u0131\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 toxuna bil\u0259c\u0259yim – ruhuma toxunacaq yarpaqlar g\u0259zirdim. H\u0259rd\u0259n ya\u011f\u0131\u015f da \u00e7is\u0259l\u0259yir, k\u00fcl\u0259yin qovdu\u011fu damlalar \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc dodaqlar\u0131ma vururdu. Asta-asta gedir, t\u0259l\u0259sm\u0259d\u0259n bu g\u00f6z\u0259lliyi ruhuma hopdurmaq ist\u0259yirdim. \u0130nsan harasa getm\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259, t\u0259l\u0259sm\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 yerim\u0259k d\u0259 xo\u015fb\u0259xt edir onu. B\u0259li, m\u0259n indi xo\u015fb\u0259xt idim – y\u0259ni onda, o g\u00fcn… b\u0259s, m\u0259n kim\u0259m? El\u0259 qoca deyil\u0259m, cavan da olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131m kimi. Otuz be\u015f ya\u015f\u0131nda saqqall\u0131, uzun boylu, qad\u0131nlar\u0131n yara\u015f\u0131ql\u0131 adland\u0131raca\u011f\u0131 bir ki\u015fiy\u0259m. Qad\u0131nlar \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn yara\u015f\u0131ql\u0131 olsam da, he\u00e7 vaxt bir qad\u0131n m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn g\u00f6z\u0259l olmad\u0131, olmayacaqd\u0131 da… \u0259g\u0259r o g\u00fcn buludlar g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fin \u00f6n\u00fcn\u00fc k\u0259sm\u0259s\u0259ydi. M\u0259nd\u0259n ba\u015fqa be\u015f qarda\u015f\u0131m\u0131n olma\u011f\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 azad h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259t etm\u0259y\u0259 imkan verdi. Atam\u0131n pulu da vard\u0131 – uzun s\u00f6z\u00fcn q\u0131sas\u0131, m\u0259n\u0259 ehtiyac\u0131 yoxdu. A\u011fl\u0131m k\u0259s\u0259nd\u0259n sonra evd\u0259n ayr\u0131ld\u0131m. \u00c7ox oxusam da, ali m\u0259kt\u0259b\u0259 getm\u0259dim. N\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 diplomdan daha \u00e7ox kitablar m\u0259ni \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kdi. Ali m\u0259kt\u0259b\u0259 itir\u0259c\u0259yim zaman\u0131 kitab oxuma\u011fa s\u0259rf etm\u0259k ist\u0259dim. Oxumaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn d\u0259 \u0259n uy\u011fun yer kitab d\u00fckan\u0131 olacaqd\u0131. Bel\u0259likl\u0259, insanlardan m\u00fcmk\u00fcn q\u0259d\u0259r uzaq olacam, bura g\u0259l\u0259n insanlar da ist\u0259r-ist\u0259m\u0259z m\u0259niml\u0259, ancaq kitab haqq\u0131nda dan\u0131\u015fmal\u0131 olacaqd\u0131. Y\u0259ni, qad\u0131nlar\u0131n v\u0259 ki\u015fil\u0259rin a\u011f\u0131ls\u0131z dediyi o tipl\u0259rd\u0259n\u0259m.<\/p>\n

Sonra bird\u0259n n\u0259s\u0259 oldu.\u00a0 Saqqal\u0131m\u0131 isladan\u00a0 ya\u011fmur damlalar\u0131n\u0131 sil\u0259rk\u0259n onu g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Bir xeyli aral\u0131dan m\u0259n\u0259 do\u011fru g\u0259lirdi. Hiss olunurdu ki, o da t\u0259l\u0259sm\u0259d\u0259n add\u0131mlay\u0131r. Uzun qara sa\u00e7lar\u0131 k\u00fcl\u0259kl\u0259 oynay\u0131r, ona qonaq g\u0259l\u0259n ya\u011f\u0131\u015f damc\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131\u00a0 b\u00f6y\u00fck mehribanl\u0131qla qar\u015f\u0131lay\u0131rd\u0131. Boyumuz eyni olard\u0131, ancaq m\u0259nd\u0259n g\u0259nc idi. \u0130yirmi be\u015f ya\u015f\u0131 ancaq olard\u0131. \u0130ndi ona yax\u0131nla\u015fmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn – g\u00f6zl\u0259rini g\u00f6rm\u0259k ist\u0259yirdim \u0259slind\u0259, add\u0131mlar\u0131m\u0131 tez-tez atma\u011fa ba\u015flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. \u0130ndi t\u0259l\u0259sirdim, indi xo\u015fb\u0259xt deyildim…. ancaq yen\u0259 d\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yim\u0259 tabe olmu\u015fdum. Bu uzun, s\u0259rt adam ilk d\u0259f\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yin\u0259 m\u0259\u011flub olmu\u015fdu. \u0130ndi aradak\u0131 m\u0259saf\u0259 bir ne\u00e7\u0259 add\u0131m olard\u0131, ancaq g\u00f6rm\u00fcrd\u00fc m\u0259ni. Onun da qulaqlar\u0131nda qulaqc\u0131q vard\u0131. Kim bilir, indi hans\u0131 d\u00fcnyalara s\u0259yah\u0259t edir, n\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr. Bu bir ne\u00e7\u0259 saniy\u0259d\u0259 a\u011fl\u0131mdan ke\u00e7\u0259nl\u0259ri \u00e7ox yox, be\u015f d\u0259qiq\u0259 \u00f6nc\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 des\u0259ydil\u0259r, g\u00fcl\u0259rdim. \u0130ndi is\u0259 bir u\u015faq d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259si il\u0259 onun m\u0259n\u0259 do\u011fru g\u0259lm\u0259sin\u0259 izn verdim. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259li oldu\u011fundan m\u0259n\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259c\u0259yini bilm\u0259di. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 he\u00e7 m\u0259ni g\u00f6rm\u00fcrd\u00fc… astaca ba\u015f\u0131 \u00e7iynim\u0259 d\u0259ydi. O, m\u0259n\u0259 toxunmaqla yuxudan oyand\u0131, m\u0259ns\u0259 yuxuya- x\u0259yala ayaq basd\u0131m. \u00c7ox utanm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 bu s\u0259hvi \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn. D\u00f6n\u0259-d\u00f6n\u0259 \u00fczr ist\u0259yirdi. Yaz\u0131q q\u0131z bils\u0259ydi, bu oyunu onunla tan\u0131\u015f ola bilm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn m\u0259n etmi\u015f\u0259m, y\u0259qin ki, sa\u00e7\u0131ma-saqqal\u0131ma baxmadan bir sill\u0259 yap\u0131\u015fd\u0131rard\u0131 \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259. Ancaq bilmirdi v\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00fcnahkar hiss edirdi. Bu an ya\u011f\u0131\u015f da daha romantik \u00e7is\u0259l\u0259m\u0259yi dayand\u0131r\u0131b, insanlar\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n uzaqla\u015fd\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131. C\u0259sar\u0259timi toplay\u0131b, onu \u00e7ox da uzaqda olmayan d\u00fckan\u0131ma d\u0259v\u0259t etdim. H\u0259m kitablara baxarsan ya\u011f\u0131\u015f k\u0259s\u0259n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r, h\u0259m d\u0259 daha rahat- islanmadan \u00fczr ist\u0259y\u0259rs\u0259n. Bu ikincini dey\u0259rk\u0259n ikimiz d\u0259 g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259dik. Raz\u0131 olmu\u015fdu. \u0130ndi ikimiz d\u0259 parkdan bir az aral\u0131da olan doqquz m\u0259rt\u0259b\u0259li binan\u0131n birinci m\u0259rt\u0259b\u0259sind\u0259 yerl\u0259\u015f\u0259n d\u00fckana do\u011fru t\u0259l\u0259sirdik. Maraql\u0131d\u0131, dem\u0259k, insan t\u0259l\u0259s\u0259rk\u0259n d\u0259 xo\u015fb\u0259xt ola bil\u0259rmi\u015f. Bunu da indi \u00f6yr\u0259ndim. M\u00fctl\u0259q olan yaln\u0131z yarad\u0131c\u0131 idi. Geri qalan h\u0259r \u015fey d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259 – bir formadan ba\u015fqa formaya ke\u00e7\u0259 bil\u0259rdi. M\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, bayaq insanlar\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 \u00e7\u0259k\u0259n ya\u011f\u0131\u015f, indi \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n uzaqla\u015fd\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131. Ya da ki, m\u0259nim d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259l\u0259rim….<\/p>\n

D\u00fckandan i\u00e7\u0259ri gir\u0259nd\u0259 ikimiz d\u0259 bir xeyli islanm\u0131\u015fd\u0131q. Ancaq ya\u011f\u0131\u015f bu g\u00f6z\u0259lliyi soldura bilm\u0259mi\u015fdi. \u00dcz\u00fcnd\u0259 – g\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259, dodaqlar\u0131nda boya olsayd\u0131, indi eyb\u0259c\u0259r hala salm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 onu, ancaq \u00fcz\u00fc bir u\u015faq \u00fcz\u00fc kimi t\u0259rav\u0259tli v\u0259 g\u00f6z\u0259ldi. Ya\u011f\u0131\u015f dayanmaq ist\u0259mirdi. Dayanmas\u0131n\u0131 he\u00e7 m\u0259n d\u0259 ist\u0259mirdim. Ya\u011f\u0131\u015f dayansa, o, \u00e7\u0131x\u0131b ged\u0259c\u0259kdi. El\u0259 bir \u015fey etm\u0259liydim ki, bir az daha qals\u0131n. Gets\u0259 bel\u0259, yen\u0259 g\u0259lsin – onu g\u00f6r\u0259 bilim. D\u00fckana gir\u0259nd\u0259n b\u0259ri dan\u0131\u015fmadan, ancaq kitablara bax\u0131rd\u0131. Y\u0259qin, kitablar\u0131 o da sevir dey\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm. O, kitablara baxark\u0259n m\u0259n d\u0259 \u00e7ay d\u0259ml\u0259dim. Qona\u011f\u0131m\u0131 \u00e7aya d\u0259v\u0259t ed\u0259c\u0259kdim bir azdan. Art\u0131q bir ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u0259qiq\u0259 olard\u0131 ki, \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 g\u00fcl r\u0259sml\u0259rinin oldu\u011fu qal\u0131n romana bax\u0131rd\u0131. V\u0259 bird\u0259n qeyri ixtiyari olaraq: \u201cha\u00e7and\u0131 bu kitab\u0131 oxumaq ist\u0259yir\u0259m\u201d deyib, d\u0259rind\u0259n n\u0259f\u0259s ald\u0131. Art\u0131q \u00e7ay\u0131 s\u00fczd\u00fcy\u00fcmd\u0259n onu masaya d\u0259v\u0259t etdim. Utana-utana \u0259yl\u0259\u015fdi. \u00c7ay\u0131 dodaqlar\u0131na yax\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131rark\u0259n \u0259ll\u0259rinin \u0259sdiyini g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Bir az sonra ya\u011f\u0131\u015f dayanm\u0131\u015f, \u00e7ay\u0131n\u0131 is\u0259 bitirmi\u015fdi. Getm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn aya\u011fa qalxanda, ondan bir d\u0259qiq\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259m\u0259sini xahi\u015f edib, bayaqdan baxd\u0131\u011f\u0131 o \u201cg\u00fcll\u00fc roman\u0131\u201d ona uzatd\u0131m. N\u0259s\u0259 kitab\u0131 almaq ist\u0259mirdi. Utana- utana \u201cbunun qiym\u0259ti \u00e7ox bahad\u0131, ala bilm\u0259r\u0259m\u201d dedi. O an m\u0259n d\u0259 pis oldum. Ax\u0131 satmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn uzatmam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m kitab\u0131 ona. \u018fg\u0259r h\u0259diyy\u0259 etdiyimi s\u00f6yl\u0259s\u0259m, b\u0259lk\u0259 q\u0259bul etm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k, ets\u0259 d\u0259, utand\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan bir daha g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259kdi bura. Onun \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn oxuyub, qaytara bil\u0259c\u0259yini s\u00f6yl\u0259dim. Buradan ist\u0259nil\u0259n kitab\u0131 al\u0131b, oxuya bil\u0259c\u0259yini s\u00f6yl\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259rinin i\u00e7inin g\u00fcld\u00fcy\u00fc g\u00f6rd\u00fcm ya, o an m\u0259nim d\u0259, sevgimin d\u0259 can\u0131 c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m\u0259 dedim \u00fcr\u0259yimd\u0259n. Bir insan\u0131n g\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259ki g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn s\u0259b\u0259bi olmaqdan daha g\u00f6z\u0259l n\u0259 ola bil\u0259rdi. Tam qap\u0131dan \u00e7\u0131xark\u0259n: \u201cad\u0131m Elyanorad\u0131\u201d dedi\u00a0 v\u0259 qa\u00e7a- qa\u00e7a uzaqla\u015fd\u0131 m\u0259nd\u0259n…<\/p>\n

Geri d\u00f6n\u00fcb, onun \u00e7ay i\u00e7diyi fincana \u00e7ay s\u00fczd\u00fcm. R\u0259fl\u0259r\u0259 yax\u0131nla\u015f\u0131b,\u00a0 \u201cg\u00fcll\u00fc roman\u201ddan birini g\u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fcm v\u0259 oxuma\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131m. Fincan\u0131 dodaqlar\u0131ma yax\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131rark\u0259n \u0259limin \u0259sdiyini g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. B\u0259li, indi m\u0259nim d\u0259 \u0259ll\u0259rim \u0259sirdi. Onun toxundu\u011fu bir \u015fey\u0259 toxunark\u0259n. \u00c7ay i\u00e7diyim fincana bir az \u00f6nc\u0259 onun dodaqlar\u0131n\u0131n d\u0259ydiyini, \u0259limd\u0259ki kitab\u0131 indi onun da oxudu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fckc\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yim, sanki yerind\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xacaq, \u00e7\u0131xacaq v\u0259 \u00e7ox uzaqlara ged\u0259c\u0259k dey\u0259 qorxurdum.<\/p>\n

B\u0259li, o g\u00fcn\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r t\u0259l\u0259sm\u0259d\u0259n yeriy\u0259rdim, s\u0259h\u0259r simit v\u0259 \u00e7ay, sonra oxudu\u011fum bir roman xo\u015fb\u0259xt ed\u0259 bilirdi m\u0259ni… ancaq o g\u00fcnd\u0259n sonra h\u0259r \u015fey d\u0259yi\u015fdi. Ax\u015fam ev\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 ilk i\u015fim art\u0131q m\u0259nd\u0259n bir par\u00e7a olan saqqallar\u0131m\u0131 q\u0131rxmaq oldu. Daha sonra sa\u00e7\u0131m\u0131 daray\u0131b, \u0259n g\u00f6z\u0259l paltarlar\u0131m\u0131 geyindim v\u0259 aylard\u0131r getm\u0259diyim ail\u0259min yan\u0131na getdim. Daha m\u0259nd\u0259n \u00fcmidi k\u0259sdikl\u0259ri \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn m\u0259ni itirib-axtarm\u0131rd\u0131lar. Yen\u0259 d\u0259 h\u00f6rm\u0259t etdikl\u0259ri \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn se\u00e7iml\u0259rim\u0259 – ya\u015fam t\u0259rzim\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fm\u0131rd\u0131lar. \u0130ndi qap\u0131da m\u0259ni bu halda – saqqals\u0131z, s\u0259liq\u0259li geyimd\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcnc\u0259 anam, sanki bir an tan\u0131mad\u0131. B\u0259li, d\u0259yi\u015fmi\u015fdim. Buludlar\u0131 g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fin \u00f6n\u00fcn\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xard\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00fcn Tanr\u0131 m\u0259nim qar\u015f\u0131ma da Elyanoran\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xartd\u0131.<\/p>\n

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Bu arada m\u0259n d\u0259 o \u201cg\u00fcll\u00fc roman\u0131\u201d maraqla oxuma\u011fa ba\u015flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Roman\u0131 g\u0259nc yazar xan\u0131mlar\u0131m\u0131zdan biri yazm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Ya\u015f\u0131n\u0131n az olmas\u0131na baxmayaraq, \u0259s\u0259ri \u00e7ox g\u00f6z\u0259l yazm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. T\u0259cr\u00fcb\u0259m\u0259 \u0259saslanaraq dey\u0259 bil\u0259rdim ki, bu roman he\u00e7 d\u0259 d\u00fcnya klassikl\u0259rinin \u0259s\u0259rl\u0259rind\u0259n geri qalm\u0131rd\u0131. Bu g\u00fcn\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r bu yazar\u0131 tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn heyfisl\u0259ndim.\u00a0 \u018fs\u0259r insan\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kir, haldan-hala sal\u0131rd\u0131. \u0130lk c\u00fcml\u0259sind\u0259n ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u0259f\u0259 a\u011flad\u0131m, g\u00fcld\u00fcm, ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u0259f\u0259 ehtirasland\u0131m xat\u0131rlam\u0131ram. B\u00fct\u00fcn insani duy\u011fular\u0131 \u00e7ox t\u0259bii \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 anlatm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Bir g\u0259nc q\u0131z\u0131n h\u0259yat\u0131ndan b\u0259hs edirdi \u0259s\u0259r – x\u0259r\u00e7\u0259ng x\u0259st\u0259liyin\u0259 tutulmu\u015f cavan bir q\u0131z v\u0259 onu b\u0259ladan xilas etm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan sevgilisi. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc gah q\u0131z\u0131n, gah da o\u011flan\u0131n yerin\u0259 qoyurdum. \u0130lk d\u0259f\u0259 t\u0259k – yaln\u0131z oldu\u011fuma \u00fcz\u00fcld\u00fcm, dey\u0259s\u0259n. \u0130ndi a\u011f\u0131r bir x\u0259st\u0259liy\u0259 yaxalansam, m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u00fcz\u00fcl\u0259c\u0259k, dua ed\u0259c\u0259k bir sevdiyim yoxdu. Yaln\u0131z ba\u015f\u0131na \u00f6l\u0259rdim. Gec\u0259 bo\u011faz\u0131m qurusa, bir fincan su ver\u0259n olmaz. Susuzluqdan \u00f6nc\u0259 m\u0259ni k\u0259d\u0259rim bo\u011fard\u0131. V\u0259 ya o q\u0131z\u0131n sevgilsinin yerind\u0259 olsayd\u0131m, y\u0259ni m\u0259nim sevdiyim x\u0259r\u00e7\u0259ng olsayd\u0131, m\u0259n n\u0259 ed\u0259rdim?\u00a0 Bu sual m\u0259ni \u0259m\u0259lli-ba\u015fl\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcrd\u00fc. Bir an g\u00f6zl\u0259rimin \u00f6n\u00fcn\u0259 Elyanora g\u0259ldi. Ax\u0131, indiy\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r n\u0259s\u0259 hiss etdiyim t\u0259k qad\u0131n o idi. \u00dcr\u0259yim yerind\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xacaq kimi oldu. Sevdiyimin g\u00f6zl\u0259rimin \u00f6n\u00fcnd\u0259 \u0259rim\u0259sin\u0259 dayana bilm\u0259zdim. O an, \u0259slind\u0259 n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r z\u0259if oldu\u011fumu anlad\u0131m. Q\u0131raqdan baxanda uzun boylu, d\u0259mir irad\u0259li \u00e7ox g\u00fccl\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u0259n m\u0259n. Dem\u0259k ki, indiy\u0259c\u0259n bir yalana h\u0259r k\u0259si inand\u0131rm\u0131\u015fam, \u0259n ba\u015fda da \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc. Ail\u0259-u\u015faq \u0259slind\u0259 \u0259n \u00e7ox ist\u0259diyim \u015feydi, ancaq onlara n\u0259s\u0259 olsa, dayana bilm\u0259zdim. U\u015fa\u011f\u0131m y\u0131x\u0131l\u0131b dizi qanasa, o qan \u00fcr\u0259yimd\u0259n axard\u0131. \u0130ndi romandak\u0131 o q\u0131z \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn g\u00f6zl\u0259rimd\u0259n ya\u015f ax\u0131rd\u0131. \u018fvv\u0259ll\u0259r d\u0259 bir \u0259s\u0259r oxuyanda b\u0259rkd\u0259n g\u00fclm\u0259yi, a\u011flama\u011f\u0131 \u2013 o \u0259s\u0259ri ya\u015fama\u011f\u0131 sevirdim. Ancaq n\u0259s\u0259 bu \u0259s\u0259r f\u0259rqli idi. \u0130lk d\u0259f\u0259 bir \u0259s\u0259r ruhumun d\u0259rinlikl\u0259rin\u0259 enm\u0259yi bacarm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Y\u0259qin ki, Elyanora da indi eyni hissl\u0259ri ya\u015fay\u0131rd\u0131. \u201cG\u00f6r\u0259s\u0259n, sevdiyi varm\u0131?!\u201d d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm…<\/p>\n

500 s\u0259hif\u0259lik \u0259s\u0259ri bir ne\u00e7\u0259 g\u00fcnd\u0259 bitirmi\u015fdim. \u018fslind\u0259 daha \u00f6nc\u0259, daha tez bitir\u0259rdim, ancaq d\u00fckana g\u0259l\u0259n insanlarla da ilgil\u0259nm\u0259k laz\u0131md\u0131. Daimi m\u00fc\u015ft\u0259ril\u0259rim olan g\u0259ncl\u0259r vard\u0131. Kitab almaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn g\u0259ldikl\u0259ri zaman birlikd\u0259 \u00e7ay i\u00e7\u0259r, b\u0259z\u0259n saatlaca s\u00f6hb\u0259t ed\u0259rdik. Bu balaca d\u00fckan, ad\u0259ta, kitabxana olmu\u015fdu. G\u0259ncl\u0259rin bura g\u0259lm\u0259l\u0259rinin bir s\u0259b\u0259bi d\u0259, dem\u0259k olar ki, buradak\u0131 kitablar\u0131n h\u0259r birinin yazar\u0131 haqq\u0131nda m\u0259nim m\u0259lumatl\u0131 olma\u011f\u0131m idi. \u0130nsan oxudu\u011fu \u0259s\u0259rin m\u00fc\u0259llifini tan\u0131d\u0131qca yazd\u0131qlar\u0131n\u0131 – onu k\u0259d\u0259rini, sevincini daha yax\u015f\u0131 anlay\u0131r. M\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n: Stendal\u0131 tan\u0131madan Julian Soreli nec\u0259 anlamaq olard\u0131 ki?!<\/p>\n

D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fcm ki, y\u0259qin Elyanora da kitab\u0131 oxuyub bitirib v\u0259 geri g\u0259tir\u0259c\u0259k. Onu yenid\u0259n g\u00f6r\u0259c\u0259m dey\u0259 az qals\u0131n, h\u0259y\u0259candan \u00f6l\u0259c\u0259kdim. H\u0259r s\u0259h\u0259r i\u015f\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 t\u0259ra\u015f olur, s\u0259liq\u0259 il\u0259 \u00fct\u00fcl\u0259nmi\u015f k\u00f6yn\u0259yimi geyib, \u00fcst\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00f6z\u0259l \u0259tirl\u0259r s\u0259pirdim. G\u00f6r\u0259s\u0259n, m\u0259ni saqqals\u0131z g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 n\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u0259c\u0259k v\u0259 ya m\u0259nim haqq\u0131mda n\u0259s\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcbm\u00fc? Vaxt ke\u00e7dikc\u0259 d\u0259li kimi olurdum, ancaq o g\u0259lmirdi ki, g\u0259lmirdi. Getdikc\u0259 \u00fcmidimi itirm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131m. \u018fvv\u0259l g\u00fcnl\u0259r, sonra h\u0259ft\u0259l\u0259r ke\u00e7di. Daha g\u00f6zl\u0259mirdim onu, g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259yini bilirdim. Yen\u0259 \u0259vv\u0259lki hal\u0131na d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc b\u0259d\u0259nim – uzun saqqal, k\u0259d\u0259rli v\u0259 ciddi bir mimika. Di g\u0259l ki, daha ruhum \u0259vv\u0259lki deyildi. Elyanora ruhumu bir u\u015faq ruhuna \u00e7evirm\u0259yi bacarm\u0131\u015fd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Aradan bir xeyli ke\u00e7mi\u015fdi ki, m\u0259n\u0259 po\u00e7tla bir qutu g\u0259ldi. He\u00e7 n\u0259y\u0259 mara\u011f\u0131m olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan qutunu bir k\u0259nara atd\u0131m. Daha \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc d\u0259, Elyanoran\u0131 da unutmu\u015fdum. Unutmad\u0131\u011f\u0131m birc\u0259 dodaqlar\u0131ma vuran ya\u011fmur, dodaqlar\u0131ma dad ver\u0259n o fincandan \u00e7ay i\u00e7m\u0259k idi…<\/p>\n

Bir g\u00fcn n\u0259s\u0259 o qutunu a\u00e7mal\u0131 oldum. Bir d\u0259 n\u0259 g\u00f6rs\u0259m yax\u015f\u0131d\u0131 – o kitab v\u0259 i\u00e7ind\u0259 d\u0259 bir m\u0259ktub…<\/p>\n

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\u201c\u018fziz dostum, o g\u00fcn g\u0259zm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn parka \u00e7\u0131xanda s\u0259ninl\u0259 rastla\u015fd\u0131q. Onu deyim ki, m\u0259n\u0259 do\u011fru g\u0259l\u0259n bu yara\u015f\u0131ql\u0131 o\u011flan\u0131n \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc bil\u0259r\u0259k m\u0259n\u0259 vurmas\u0131 n\u0259s\u0259 \u0259s\u0259bl\u0259\u015fdirm\u0259di, h\u0259tta xo\u015fuma bel\u0259 g\u0259ldi dey\u0259 bil\u0259r\u0259m. Onun \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn s\u0259ninl\u0259 d\u00fckana gedib, \u00e7ay i\u00e7m\u0259y\u0259 raz\u0131 oldum. Yoxsa bir az aral\u0131da h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131m ma\u015f\u0131nda m\u0259ni g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdi. N\u0259s\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259n k\u0259d\u0259r ya\u011fan bu cavan o\u011flan\u0131 q\u0131rmaq ist\u0259m\u0259dim. \u0130nan ki, evli olmasayd\u0131m, kitab\u0131 s\u0259n\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcm qaytarard\u0131m. H\u0259, bir d\u0259 onu deyim ki, o baxd\u0131\u011f\u0131m kitab\u0131n m\u00fc\u0259llifi m\u0259n\u0259m. Onu imzalay\u0131b s\u0259nin \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn geri g\u00f6nd\u0259rir\u0259m. Dostum, \u0259min ol ki, n\u00f6vb\u0259ti roman\u0131mda Elyanora il\u0259 s\u0259nin hekay\u0259ni yazacam v\u0259 bu hekay\u0259 g\u00f6z\u0259l bit\u0259c\u0259k. \u0130n\u015fallah q\u0259lbind\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 qar\u015f\u0131 kin, nifr\u0259t olmaz…\u201d<\/p>\n

Sevgil\u0259rl\u0259 S.Z<\/p>\n

M\u0259ktubu oxuyub bitir\u0259nd\u0259n sonra ruhumda bir y\u00fcng\u00fcll\u00fck duydum. Daha ac\u0131 \u00e7\u0259kmirdi q\u0259lbim. G\u0259lmi\u015fdi Elyanora, b\u0259li g\u0259lmi\u015fdi…<\/p>\n

Yazar dostum n\u00f6vb\u0259ti roman\u0131nda n\u0259 yazacaq bilmir\u0259m, ancaq onun n\u00f6vb\u0259ti \u0259s\u0259ri m\u0259nim \u00fcr\u0259yim\u0259 sevgini \u00f6yr\u0259tm\u0259k oldu. Daha bu yara\u015f\u0131ql\u0131 o\u011flan q\u0259lbini q\u0131zlardan gizl\u0259tm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259kdi….<\/p>\n

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Yaz\u0131ya 837 d\u0259f\u0259 bax\u0131l\u0131b<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

(hekay\u0259) Onun ad\u0131 il\u0259… He\u00e7 n\u0259 bilmir\u0259m. N\u0259 yazacam, nec\u0259 yazmal\u0131yam – he\u00e7 n\u0259. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc s\u00f6zl\u0259r\u0259 v\u0259 onun sahibin\u0259 \u0259man\u0259t edib, h\u0259rfl\u0259rin d\u00fcnyas\u0131na yolculu\u011fa \u00e7\u0131x\u0131ram. Hekay\u0259 dan\u0131\u015fmaq yeni axma\u011fa ba\u015flayan bir \u00e7ay kimidi. \u00dcr\u0259yin qaynay\u0131r, ancaq bilmirs\u0259n, kimin hekay\u0259sini dan\u0131\u015facaqsan – hans\u0131 yolla axacaqsan. Bu zaman iki yolun olur. Ya \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc ona \u0259man\u0259t edib, yola […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6746,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[16],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10982"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=10982"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10982\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10983,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10982\/revisions\/10983"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/6746"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=10982"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=10982"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=10982"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}