{"id":12308,"date":"2019-02-06T22:24:25","date_gmt":"2019-02-06T18:24:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=12308"},"modified":"2019-02-06T22:24:25","modified_gmt":"2019-02-06T18:24:25","slug":"zumrud-r%c9%99himova-bicaq-yarasi-v%c9%99-ya-x%c9%99yan%c9%99t-hekay%c9%99","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=12308","title":{"rendered":"Z\u00dcMR\u00dcD R\u018fH\u0130MOVA – BI\u00c7AQ YARASI V\u018f YA X\u018fYAN\u018fT (hekay\u0259)"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Zumrud\"<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Z\u00dcMR\u00dcD R\u018fH\u0130MOVA<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

AYB-nin \u00fczv\u00fcd\u00fcr, K\u0259lb\u0259c\u0259r rayonunun i\u015f\u011fal\u0131ndan sonra m\u00fcv\u0259qq\u0259ti olaraq Ming\u0259\u00e7evird\u0259 m\u0259skunla\u015f\u0131b. \u00dc\u00e7 kitab m\u00fc\u0259llifidir. Ming\u0259\u00e7evird\u0259ki 5 sayl\u0131 orta m\u0259kt\u0259bd\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259yir. \u201cB\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259\u201d jurnal\u0131n\u0131n \u015f\u00f6b\u0259 redaktorudur. Hekay\u0259 v\u0259 povestl\u0259ri \u00e7e\u015fidli q\u0259zet v\u0259 jurnallarda d\u0259rc olunub. H\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131 yurd sava\u015f\u0131nda \u015f\u0259hid olub.<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong>BI\u00c7AQ YARASI V\u018f YA X\u018fYAN\u018fT<\/p>\n

(hekay\u0259)<\/p>\n

D\u00fcnya g\u00f6zl\u0259rin\u0259 bombo\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc. Taleyinin, \u00f6mr\u00fcn\u00fcn m\u00f6ht\u0259\u015f\u0259m bir qalas\u0131 u\u00e7mu\u015f, o qalan\u0131n s\u00f6k\u00fcl\u00fcb da\u011f\u0131lm\u0131\u015f k\u0259rpicl\u0259ri aras\u0131nda \u00e7abalaya-\u00e7abalaya qalm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u00d6mr\u00fcboyu i\u00e7ind\u0259 g\u0259zdirdiyi ac\u0131 bir h\u0259qiq\u0259tin n\u0259 vaxtsa h\u0259yt\u0131na z\u0259h\u0259r qataca\u011f\u0131ndan ehtiyat edirdi. Gizl\u0259tdiyi sirrin qorxusu-xofu o q\u0259d\u0259r g\u00fccl\u00fc idi ki,\u00a0 yad\u0131na d\u00fc\u015f\u0259nd\u0259 \u0259ll\u0259ri titr\u0259yir, v\u00fccudunda bir istilik hiss edirdi. G\u00f6zl\u0259rini yumur, h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 yad\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131xara bilm\u0259diyi o anlar\u0131 xat\u0131rlay\u0131r v\u0259 tez d\u0259 unutma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. \u00c7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131, ancaq unuda bilmirdi. \u00c7\u00fcnki sevdiyi adam \u00f6zg\u0259sinin v\u00fcsal\u0131na qovu\u015fub, onu d\u00fcnyalar q\u0259d\u0259r sev\u0259n \u015f\u0259xs\u0259 x\u0259yan\u0259t etmi\u015fdi…<\/p>\n

“Etm\u0259mi\u015f\u0259m, etm\u0259mi\u015f\u0259m…” dey\u0259-dey\u0259 ba\u011f\u0131rmaq, q\u0131\u015fq\u0131r\u0131b al\u0259m\u0259 s\u0259s salmaq ist\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259 bunu da bacarm\u0131rd\u0131. X\u0259yan\u0259t etm\u0259mi\u015fdi. Ona bu x\u0259yan\u0259ti etdir\u0259n adamdan qisas almaq ist\u0259yirdi, amma h\u0259l\u0259 vaxt-m\u0259qam tapa bilmirdi. Vaxt uzand\u0131qca i\u00e7ind\u0259ki qisas hissi daha da g\u00fccl\u0259nirdi…<\/p>\n

Xalid\u0259 ali t\u0259hsilini ba\u015fa vurandan sonra bir ne\u00e7\u0259 il i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259r\u0259k valideynl\u0259rin\u0259 k\u00f6m\u0259k etmi\u015fdi. Ail\u0259nin ilk \u00f6vlad\u0131 idi. Evd\u0259 alt\u0131 bac\u0131, bir qarda\u015f idil\u0259r. \u00c7ox kas\u0131b ya\u015fay\u0131rd\u0131lar. Ail\u0259 qurmaq, ev-e\u015fik sahibi olmaq he\u00e7 yad\u0131na da d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fcrd\u00fc. A\u011fb\u0259niz, yara\u015f\u0131ql\u0131 bir q\u0131z idi. Geyindiyi h\u0259r bir libas bi\u00e7imli b\u0259d\u0259nin\u0259 yara\u015f\u0131q verirdi. Gur sa\u00e7l\u0131, qumral g\u00f6zl\u00fc Xalid\u0259ni ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 m\u0259kanda ist\u0259m\u0259y\u0259n, sevm\u0259y\u0259n o\u011flan qalmam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. O, is\u0259 he\u00e7 k\u0259s\u0259 k\u00f6n\u00fcl vermir, \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n ki\u00e7ik bac\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131 v\u0259 qarda\u015f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc. H\u0259r d\u0259f\u0259 onlar\u0131 sevindir\u0259nd\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc d\u00fcnyan\u0131n \u0259n xo\u015fb\u0259xti san\u0131rd\u0131. H\u0259rd\u0259n anas\u0131n\u0131n q\u0131na\u011f\u0131na tu\u015f g\u0259lirdi: \u201cYa\u015f\u0131n \u00f6t\u00fcr, q\u0131z\u0131m, bizi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcns\u0259n g\u0259r\u0259k onda he\u00e7 ail\u0259 qurmayasan. A\u011f\u0131ll\u0131, yax\u015f\u0131 o\u011flanlar ist\u0259yir s\u0259ni. Birin\u0259 k\u00f6n\u00fcl ver, ail\u0259n, evin-e\u015fiyin olsun\u201d!.. \u201cH\u0259l\u0259 yax\u015f\u0131 o\u011flan vaxt\u0131 deyil, ana, u\u015faqlara k\u00f6m\u0259k laz\u0131md\u0131r.\u00a0 Atam x\u0259st\u0259 adamd\u0131r, i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259 bilmir, g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u0259m \u0259ziyy\u0259t \u00e7\u0259kir, onu da m\u00fcalic\u0259 etdirm\u0259liyik. Ail\u0259 qurmasam d\u00fcnya da\u011f\u0131lmaz ki…\u201d – dey\u0259r\u0259k ya\u015farm\u0131\u015f g\u00f6zl\u0259rini ondan gizl\u0259tm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. Ana is\u0259: “Yaz\u0131q balam, bizim ucbat\u0131m\u0131zdan gec\u0259-g\u00fcnd\u00fcz bilmir, az qal\u0131b ad\u0131 da yad\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131xa”- dey\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yind\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr, d\u0259rin fikirl\u0259r i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 \u00e7apalay\u0131rd\u0131…<\/p>\n

Xalid\u0259 savadl\u0131, bacar\u0131ql\u0131 idi. \u00c7ox \u00e7\u0259tinlikl\u0259 oxumu\u015fdu. Ata-anas\u0131 \u0259ll\u0259rin\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259n pulla ail\u0259nin ehtiyac\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6d\u0259y\u0259 bilmirdil\u0259r. O, h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 t\u0259l\u0259b\u0259 q\u0131zlardan geyimi-kecimi il\u0259 deyil, oxuma\u011f\u0131 il\u0259 f\u0259rql\u0259nmi\u015fdi. \u00c7antas\u0131nda g\u0259zdirdiyi telefonu bel\u0259 q\u0131zlardan gizl\u0259dirdi. \u00c7\u00fcnki baxsayd\u0131lar, onu la\u011fa qoyard\u0131lar. Bir d\u0259f\u0259 qrup yolda\u015flar\u0131ndan biri Xalid\u0259nin k\u00f6nl\u00fcn\u0259 d\u0259ymi\u015fdi: \u201cDe, g\u00f6r\u00fcm hans\u0131 zamanda ya\u015fay\u0131r\u0131q ki, s\u0259n d\u00f6vr\u00fcn t\u0259l\u0259bl\u0259rin\u0259 uy\u011fun geyinmirs\u0259n, iki il\u0259 bir \u00e7anta d\u0259yi\u015firs\u0259n, yax\u015f\u0131 oxumaq \u015f\u0259rt deyil. \u0130nsan\u0131 geyimin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 qiym\u0259tl\u0259ndirirl\u0259r. A\u011f\u0131ll\u0131, t\u0259rbiy\u0259li olmaq inidiki z\u0259man\u0259d\u0259 he\u00e7 n\u0259yi d\u0259yi\u015fmir…<\/p>\n

Xalid\u0259 onu ax\u0131racan dinl\u0259yib, sonra s\u0259birl\u0259 cavab\u0131n\u0131 vermi\u015fdi: “\u018fslind\u0259 s\u0259n d\u00fcz deyirs\u0259n. \u0130ndiki zaman\u0131n t\u0259l\u0259bl\u0259ri ba\u015fqad\u0131r. M\u0259n is\u0259 onlarla ayaqla\u015fa bilmir\u0259m. Getdiyim d\u00fcz yol m\u0259ni hara \u00e7\u0259kib aparacaqsa, oraya q\u0259d\u0259r ged\u0259c\u0259y\u0259m\u201d. \u201cGet, bac\u0131m , s\u0259n\u0259 yax\u015f\u0131 yol. Amma o yolda he\u00e7 n\u0259 qazana bilm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259n\u201d – dey\u0259n qrup yolda\u015f\u0131 g\u00f6zl\u0259rini s\u00fczd\u00fcr\u00fcb getmi\u015fdi.<\/p>\n

\u0130ll\u0259r ke\u00e7s\u0259 d\u0259 o s\u00fczg\u00fcn bax\u0131\u015flar, ri\u015fx\u0259ndli s\u00f6zl\u0259r Xalid\u0259nin yad\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131rd\u0131. O q\u0131z z\u0259ngin bir ail\u0259nin \u00f6vlad\u0131 idi. Kas\u0131bl\u0131q-\u0259ziyy\u0259t n\u0259 oldu\u011funu bilmirdi. \u018fynind\u0259ki “\u015fuba”n\u0131n qiym\u0259ti il\u0259 Xalid\u0259 bir ne\u00e7\u0259\u00a0 ay dolana bil\u0259rdi. Odur ki, onun s\u00f6zl\u0259ri\u00a0 x\u0259trin\u0259 d\u0259ys\u0259 d\u0259, \u0259slind\u0259 q\u0131z\u0131 q\u0131nam\u0131rd\u0131. Atalar demi\u015fk\u0259n: “Toxun acdan n\u0259 x\u0259b\u0259ri…”<\/p>\n

\u018fll\u0259rini ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131na qoyub fikr\u0259 getmi\u015fdi, yata bilmirdi. Atas\u0131n\u0131n x\u0259st\u0259liyi \u015fidd\u0259tl\u0259nmi\u015fdi. Onun \u00e7ar\u0259siz bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131 \u00fcr\u0259yini g\u00f6yn\u0259dirdi. \u201cYox \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 ikinci i\u015f yeri tapmal\u0131yam, yoxsa…\u201d\u00a0 Atas\u0131n\u0131 itim\u0259k ist\u0259mirdi. Qarda\u015f v\u0259 bac\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131n nimda\u015f geyiml\u0259ri, qar\u0131n dolusu yem\u0259k tapmamalar\u0131 onu ikinci i\u015f yeri tapma\u011fa m\u0259cbur edirdi. Bir ne\u00e7\u0259 qeyri-h\u00fckum\u0259t t\u0259\u015fkilat\u0131na \u00fcz tutdu. Uy\u011fun g\u0259l\u0259ni d\u0259 oldu, g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259ni d\u0259. Ona ni\u015fan verdikl\u0259ri bir qap\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6yd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

-M\u0259n\u0259 \u015eahin m\u00fc\u0259llim laz\u0131md\u0131r?<\/p>\n

-Buyurun, m\u0259n\u0259m.<\/p>\n

-\u0130\u015fl\u0259m\u0259k ist\u0259yir\u0259m. Ali t\u0259hsilliy\u0259m, xarici dil d\u0259 bilir\u0259m. Bacar\u0131ql\u0131yam…<\/p>\n

-Xahi\u015f edir\u0259m \u0259yl\u0259\u015fin. Xalid\u0259 \u0259lind\u0259ki ka\u011f\u0131z\u0131 masan\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 qoub oturdu.<\/p>\n

\u015eahin q\u0131z\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxmadan ka\u011f\u0131zdak\u0131lar\u0131 t\u0259mkinl\u0259 oxudu.<\/p>\n

-Yaz\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131z ki, i\u015f yeriniz var. \u00c7atd\u0131ra bil\u0259c\u0259ksinizmi?<\/p>\n

-\u00c7atd\u0131raca\u011fam. Maddi v\u0259ziyy\u0259timiz \u00e7ox a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131r, atam x\u0259st\u0259dir, evd\u0259 t\u0259kc\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259n \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259m…<\/p>\n

-Ne\u00e7\u0259 ya\u015f\u0131n\u0131z var?!<\/p>\n

-Otuz ya\u015f\u0131m\u0131 t\u0259z\u0259c\u0259 bitirmi\u015f\u0259m.<\/p>\n

-Ail\u0259 qurmam\u0131s\u0131n\u0131z?<\/p>\n

-Xeyir, bu haqda fikirl\u0259\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 vaxt\u0131m olmay\u0131b.<\/p>\n

Ancaq bu s\u00f6zl\u0259rd\u0259n sonra \u015eahin ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 qald\u0131r\u0131b Xalid\u0259nin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxd\u0131. Ya\u015f\u0131ndan daha g\u0259nc g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc. \u00dcz\u00fcnd\u0259ki cizgil\u0259r onun z\u0259hm\u0259tke\u015f insan olu\u011fundan x\u0259b\u0259r verirdi. \u015eahin qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndak\u0131 q\u0131z\u0131n g\u00f6z\u0259l oldu\u011funu g\u00f6r\u00fcb g\u00f6zl\u0259rini ondan \u00e7\u0259k\u0259 bilmirdi. H\u0259yadan yanaqlar\u0131 allanan Xalid\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 dikmi\u015fdi.<\/p>\n

-Sizi get-g\u0259l\u0259 salmayaca\u011fam, amma\u00a0 fikirl\u0259\u015fin, iki i\u015fin a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131na tab g\u0259tir\u0259 bil\u0259c\u0259ksinizs\u0259, q\u0259rar\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 s\u0259h\u0259r bildirin, sizi i\u015f\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u0259c\u0259y\u0259m.<\/p>\n

-Q\u0259rar\u0131m q\u0259tidir, fikirl\u0259\u015fm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ba\u015fqa yolum yoxdur.<\/p>\n

-Onda \u0259riz\u0259nizi yaz\u0131n v\u0259 s\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259n f\u0259aliyy\u0259t\u0259 ba\u015faly\u0131n.<\/p>\n

-Siz\u0259 t\u0259\u015f\u0259kk\u00fcr edir\u0259m. Etimad\u0131n\u0131z\u0131\u00a0 do\u011frultma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015faram-Xalid\u0259 bunlar\u0131 deyib yandak\u0131 ota\u011fa ke\u00e7di.<\/p>\n

\u015eahin onun arxas\u0131nca bax\u0131b, ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 bulad\u0131 v\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yind\u0259: “\u0130ndiki vaxtda bel\u0259 q\u0131zlar da var imi\u015f…”- dedi.<\/p>\n

Xalid\u0259 g\u0259rgin i\u015fl\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259, yor\u011funlu\u011funu biruz\u0259 vermirdi. \u00dcz\u00fcnd\u0259ki t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcml\u0259 evd\u0259kil\u0259r\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259k-dir\u0259k verm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. Ail\u0259nin v\u0259ziyy\u0259ti d\u00fcz\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Anas\u0131 t\u0259s\u0259rr\u00fcfat i\u015fl\u0259r il\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful olur, Xalid\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fc demi\u015fk\u0259n qa\u00e7an\u0131 qovurdu. N\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259y\u0259, n\u0259 d\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 bir qad\u0131n kimi baxma\u011fa macal\u0131 yox idi. \u0130\u015fd\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259n kimi bir tik\u0259 \u00e7\u00f6r\u0259k yeyib, yata\u011f\u0131na girir, o saat da yuxuya gedirdi. Ancaq anas\u0131n\u0131n g\u00f6zl\u0259rin\u0259 yuxu getmir,\u00a0 bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131 tavana dikilib qal\u0131rd\u0131. “Ax\u0131 bu q\u0131z \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc bizim\u00e7\u00fcn niy\u0259 f\u0259da edir. M\u0259nim d\u0259 arzular\u0131m var. M\u0259n d\u0259 onu b\u0259yaz g\u0259linlik donunda g\u00f6rm\u0259k ist\u0259yir\u0259m…” Ana d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fckc\u0259 m\u0259yus olur, ancaq \u0259lind\u0259n he\u00e7 n\u0259 g\u0259lmirdi…<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

\u015eahin \u00e7ox m\u0259rh\u0259m\u0259tli, sad\u0259 q\u0259lbli insan idi. Pislik etm\u0259yi sevm\u0259zdi. Ham\u0131ya\u00a0 ehtiramla yana\u015f\u0131r v\u0259 ham\u0131dan da x\u0259tir-h\u00f6rm\u0259t g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fc. B\u00fct\u00fcn bunlara r\u0259\u011fm\u0259n h\u0259yat\u0131nda bir k\u0259siklik var idi. Otuz ya\u015f\u0131nda ail\u0259 qurmu\u015fdu, anas\u0131n\u0131n t\u0259kidi il\u0259. O Xalid\u0259d\u0259n f\u0259rqli olaraq, elm dal\u0131nca getmi\u015f, elmi ara\u015fd\u0131rmalara ba\u015f\u0131 qar\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015f, sonra is\u0259: “Daha m\u0259nim sev\u0259n vaxt\u0131m deyil, m\u0259sl\u0259h\u0259t bildiyiniz bir q\u0131zla m\u0259ni evl\u0259ndirin”- demi\u015fdi. Anas\u0131 Sona xan\u0131m i\u015f yolda\u015f\u0131 G\u00fclnaz m\u00fc\u0259llim\u0259ni a\u011f\u0131z dolusu t\u0259rifl\u0259mi\u015f v\u0259 \u015eahinin onunla evl\u0259nm\u0259sini t\u0259klif etmi\u015fdi.<\/p>\n

-Get dan\u0131\u015fd\u0131r, xo\u015fun g\u0259ls\u0259, t\u0259rbiy\u0259li q\u0131zd\u0131r, m\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lir ki, s\u0259n\u0259 yox dem\u0259z… \u015eahinin q\u0131z dal\u0131nca d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n vaxt\u0131\u00a0 deyildi, h\u0259m d\u0259 g\u00f6rm\u0259diyi adamla da evl\u0259nm\u0259k ist\u0259mirdi. Anas\u0131n\u0131 m\u0259kt\u0259b\u0259 ma\u015f\u0131nla aparark\u0259n Sona q\u0131z\u0131 ona g\u00f6st\u0259rmi\u015fdi. Q\u0131z ilk bax\u0131\u015fdan xo\u015funa g\u0259lm\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259 anas\u0131na he\u00e7 n\u0259 dem\u0259di. Ana o\u011flunun susma\u011f\u0131n\u0131 raz\u0131l\u0131q \u0259lam\u0259ti hesab etdi. S\u0259h\u0259ri g\u00fcn\u00fc G\u00fclnaza fikrini \u00e7atd\u0131rd\u0131: \u201cQ\u0131z\u0131m, o\u011flumun s\u0259nd\u0259n xo\u015fu g\u0259lir, eviniz\u0259 el\u00e7i g\u0259lm\u0259k ist\u0259yirik\u201d…\u00a0 G\u00fclnaz\u0131n el\u0259 bil \u00e7i\u00e7\u0259yi \u00e7\u0131rtlad\u0131.\u00a0 \u015eahini bir ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u0259f\u0259\u00a0 anas\u0131n\u0131 ma\u015f\u0131nla g\u0259tir\u0259nd\u0259 g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc. Sevincini biruz\u0259 verm\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131b: \u201cM\u0259n n\u0259 deyim, Sona m\u00fc\u0259llim\u0259, b\u00f6y\u00fckl\u0259rim bil\u0259r\u201d – dedi.<\/p>\n

-\u018fsas s\u00f6z sahibi \u00f6z\u00fcns\u0259n, k\u00f6nl\u00fcnd\u0259n ke\u00e7irs\u0259, valideynl\u0259rin d\u0259 raz\u0131 olarlar.<\/p>\n

Sona q\u0131zla olan s\u00f6hb\u0259ti o\u011fluna \u00e7atd\u0131randa \u015eahin dedi:<\/p>\n

-Ana niy\u0259 bel\u0259 i\u015f g\u00f6rm\u00fcs\u0259n, ax\u0131 m\u0259n s\u0259n\u0259 he\u00e7 n\u0259 dem\u0259mi\u015fdim?<\/p>\n

-N\u0259 bilim, ay o\u011ful, s\u0259n susdun, m\u0259n d\u0259 el\u0259 bildim raz\u0131san…<\/p>\n

Aradan bir ne\u00e7\u0259 g\u00fcn ke\u00e7mi\u015fdi. Katib\u0259 i\u00e7\u0259ri ke\u00e7ib \u015eahin\u0259:<\/p>\n

-\u0130ki q\u0131z sizi g\u00f6rm\u0259k ist\u0259yir, n\u0259 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn g\u0259ldikl\u0259rini soru\u015fsam da cavab verm\u0259dil\u0259r- dedi.<\/p>\n

Q\u0131zlar i\u00e7\u0259ri gir\u0259nd\u0259 \u015eahin heyr\u0259td\u0259n yerind\u0259 quruyub qald\u0131. Q\u0131zlardan biri G\u00fclnaz idi. Guya r\u0259fiq\u0259si \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn i\u015f axtar\u0131r-\u00f6z\u00fc bel\u0259 dedi. \u015eahin: \u201cH\u0259l\u0259 ki, i\u015fimiz yoxdur, olsa x\u0259b\u0259r ver\u0259r\u0259m\u201d-deyib \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc yana \u00e7evirdi. R\u0259fiq\u0259si qap\u0131dan \u00e7\u0131xanda G\u00fclnaz geriy\u0259 qanr\u0131l\u0131b dedi:<\/p>\n

-Sona m\u00fc\u0259llim\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 h\u0259r \u015feyi deyib, anamla m\u0259sl\u0259h\u0259tl\u0259\u015fmi\u015f\u0259m, adamlar\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 g\u00f6nd\u0259rin…<\/p>\n

\u015eahin q\u0131za n\u0259 dey\u0259c\u0259yini bilmirdi. El\u0259 bil dili-a\u011fz\u0131 ba\u011flanm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u00dcr\u0259yind\u0259: “Ana, indi n\u0259 edim, q\u0131z qar\u015f\u0131mda dayan\u0131b m\u0259nd\u0259n cavab g\u00f6zl\u0259yir, ona n\u0259 cavab verim ax\u0131? Deyim burda bir yaln\u0131\u015fl\u0131q var,\u00a0 yoxsa deyim ki, s\u0259n m\u0259nim q\u0259lbim\u0259 yatm\u0131rsan. Bir qad\u0131n k\u00f6nl\u00fcn\u00fc q\u0131rmaq bu q\u0259d\u0259rmi asand\u0131r?”\u00a0 \u00dcz\u00fcnd\u0259n t\u0259r damc\u0131lar\u0131 ax\u0131rd\u0131, el\u0259 bil m\u00fc\u0259llim qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nd\u00a0 imtahan verirdi. Dili topuq \u00e7ala-\u00e7ala astadan dill\u0259ndi: \u201cGedin, cavab\u0131m\u0131 anam siz\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131rar\u201d.<\/p>\n

G\u00fclnaz otaqdan \u00e7\u0131xanda \u00e7ox sevinc\u0259k g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc. \u015eahin xo\u015funa g\u0259lmi\u015fdi. Ancaq \u015eahin n\u0259 ni\u015fan \u00fcz\u00fcy\u00fc tax\u0131landa, n\u0259 d\u0259 ba\u015fqa vaxt G\u00fclnazala g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb k\u0259lm\u0259 k\u0259sdi. T\u0259kc\u0259 g\u0259lini ata evind\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xarmaq laz\u0131m g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 el ad\u0259tind\u0259n imtina ed\u0259 bilm\u0259di. \u018fslind\u0259 G\u00fclnaz \u00fcr\u0259yin\u0259 yatmam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. N\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fc xo\u015funa g\u0259lirdi, n\u0259 d\u0259 xasiyy\u0259ti. Bir-birini tamamlamayan ba\u015fqa-ba\u015fqa adamlar idil\u0259r. G\u00fclnaz \u015eahini \u00e7ox sevirdi. Amma \u0259rinin onunla soyuq davranam\u011f\u0131 xo\u015funa g\u0259lmirdi.<\/p>\n

-S\u0259n\u0259 zorla g\u0259lm\u0259mi\u015f\u0259m. \u00d6z\u00fcn ist\u0259mis\u0259n, amma bils\u0259ydim bel\u0259s\u0259n, s\u0259n\u0259 he\u00e7 yax\u0131n da d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259zdim.<\/p>\n

-Nec\u0259y\u0259m ki?<\/p>\n

-Bilmir\u0259m, el\u0259 bil g\u0259mil\u0259rin bat\u0131b. Ev\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 qa\u015f-qabaql\u0131 olursan, dinib-dan\u0131\u015fm\u0131rsan. Bir tik\u0259 \u00e7\u00f6r\u0259k yeyib, \u00f6z al\u0259min\u0259 qap\u0131l\u0131r, sonra da gedib yat\u0131rsan.<\/p>\n

-N\u0259 edim, b\u0259lk\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131b-oynay\u0131m-xasiy\u0259tim bel\u0259dir d\u0259… \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259 bilm\u0259r\u0259m ki, b\u0259l\u0259d olub sonra g\u0259l\u0259ydin.<\/p>\n

-Nec\u0259 b\u0259l\u0259d olayd\u0131m. \u00dc\u00e7 ay ni\u015fanl\u0131 qald\u0131q, bir d\u0259f\u0259 d\u0259 olsa s\u0259sini e\u015fitm\u0259dim. Dal\u0131nca qa\u00e7as\u0131 deyildim ki, s\u0259n qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131n, m\u0259n is\u0259 bunu utancaql\u0131q kimi q\u0259bul edirdim.<\/p>\n

-G\u00fclnaz, xahi\u015f edir\u0259m g\u0259l bu s\u00f6hb\u0259ti ba\u011flayaq. S\u0259ni d\u00f6ym\u00fcr\u0259m-s\u00f6ym\u00fcr\u0259m, \u00fcr\u0259yin ist\u0259diyi kimi s\u0259rb\u0259st ya\u015fay\u0131rsan. Xarakterim bel\u0259dir. Q\u0259bul el\u0259 ki, biz bel\u0259 ya\u015fayaca\u011f\u0131q.<\/p>\n

\u018fslind\u0259 \u015eahinin xarakteri bel\u0259 deyildi. O, dan\u0131\u015f\u0131b-g\u00fclm\u0259yi, s\u00f6hb\u0259t etm\u0259yi sev\u0259n adam idi. G\u00fclnaz\u0131 sev\u0259 bilmir, onun \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u00fcr\u0259yi azac\u0131q da olsa titr\u0259mirdi. H\u0259yat\u0131 z\u00fclm\u0259td\u0259 q\u0259rq olmu\u015f, el bil lal-dinm\u0259z da\u015f par\u00e7as\u0131na d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc. Anas\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00fcnahkar san\u0131rd\u0131:: “M\u0259n niy\u0259 birc\u0259 balam\u0131 b\u0259db\u0259xliy\u0259 d\u00fc\u00e7ar etdim. N\u0259 bil\u0259ydim bel\u0259 olacaq. Qad\u0131na n\u0259 var ki, ki\u015finin sevm\u0259d\u0259n evl\u0259nm\u0259si d\u0259h\u015f\u0259t imi\u015f. Q\u0131z el\u0259 d\u0259 pis deyil, s\u0259liq\u0259li, t\u0259mizkard\u0131r. \u00d6z\u00fc d\u0259 \u015eahini \u00e7ox ist\u0259yir. Amma n\u0259 olsun, bunlar\u0131n he\u00e7 biri o\u011flumun \u00fcr\u0259yinc\u0259 deyil. He\u00e7 xasiyy\u0259tl\u0259ri d\u0259 uy\u011fun g\u0259lmir. Oxumaq \u015f\u0259rt deyil, adamlarda g\u0259r\u0259k \u00fcr\u0259k yax\u0131nl\u0131\u011f\u0131 olsun. \u015eahini q\u0131nam\u0131ram, q\u0131zda bir damc\u0131 da olsa \u015firinlik yoxdur. N\u0259 bilim, Allah b\u00f6y\u00fckd\u00fcr ka\u015f ulduzlar\u0131 bar\u0131\u015fa, m\u0259n d\u0259 bir az rahatl\u0131q tapam…\u201d\u00a0 Sona xan\u0131m saatlarla \u00f6z-\u00f6z\u00fcyl\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131r, ancaq bir \u00e7\u0131x\u0131\u015f yolu tapa bilmirdi.<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

Bir ne\u00e7\u0259 il bel\u0259 d\u0259 ya\u015fad\u0131lar. G\u00fclnaz hamil\u0259 olanda Sona xan\u0131m \u00e7ox sevindi. \u201cU\u015faq onlar\u0131n aras\u0131nda k\u00f6rp\u00fc yaradacaq” – dey\u0259 fikirl\u0259\u015firdi. Ancaq s\u0259n sayd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 say, g\u00f6r f\u0259l\u0259k n\u0259 say\u0131r. Onlar\u0131n h\u0259yat yollar\u0131 ayr\u0131ld\u0131. G\u00fclnaz u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 d\u00fcnyaya g\u0259tirs\u0259 d\u0259, \u00f6z\u00fc d\u00f6\u011fu\u015fdan salamat \u00e7\u0131xa bilm\u0259yib \u00f6ld\u00fc. Sona xan\u0131m n\u0259v\u0259sini ba\u011fr\u0131na bas\u0131b, kor-pe\u015fman ev\u0259 qay\u0131td\u0131. \u015eahin g\u0259lnin vaxts\u0131z \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcnd\u0259n sars\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Q\u0131z\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fcnyaya g\u0259tir\u0259n qad\u0131n\u0131 itirm\u0259k ist\u0259m\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259 art\u0131q olan-olmu\u015fdu. Sona xan\u0131m Lal\u0259ni \u00e7ox \u00e7\u0259tinlikl\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fcd\u00fcr, \u015eahin is\u0259 k\u00f6rp\u0259 q\u0131zc\u0131\u011faz\u0131 \u0259zizl\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 el\u0259 bil u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm\u00fc il\u0259 d\u00fcnyaya boylan\u0131rd\u0131…<\/p>\n

Atas\u0131n\u0131n v\u0259ziyy\u0259ti a\u011f\u0131rla\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. Xalid\u0259 onu h\u0259kim\u0259 apard\u0131, x\u0259st\u0259nin \u0259m\u0259liyyat olunmas\u0131 laz\u0131m idi. Q\u0131z art\u0131q n\u0259 ed\u0259c\u0259yini bilmirdi. Qohumlar\u0131 da el\u0259 imkanl\u0131 deyildi, bilmirdi kim\u0259 \u00fcz tutsun. A\u011fl\u0131na \u015eahin g\u0259ldi. Utana-utana onun ota\u011f\u0131na daxil oldu. \u015eahin q\u0131z\u0131n \u00e7\u00f6hr\u0259sind\u0259ki k\u0259d\u0259ri d\u0259rhal hiss el\u0259di.<\/p>\n

-N\u0259 olub, Xalid\u0259, el\u0259 bil a\u011flam\u0131san?<\/p>\n

Xalid\u0259 zorla \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc \u0259l\u0259 al\u0131b dedi:<\/p>\n

-\u015eahin m\u00fc\u0259llim, m\u0259n\u0259 borc pul laz\u0131mdr. Atam \u0259m\u0259liiya olunmal\u0131d\u0131r. \u018fg\u0259r m\u00fcmk\u00fcns\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 k\u00f6m\u0259k edin. \u018fm\u0259k haqqm\u0131 h\u0259r ay \u015firk\u0259t\u0259 \u00f6d\u0259y\u0259r\u0259m.<\/p>\n

-Bir \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc \u0259l\u0259 al. \u018ftrafl\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 h\u0259r \u015feyi dan\u0131\u015f. Pul asan m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259dir.<\/p>\n

\u015eahin Xalid\u0259gilin ail\u0259 v\u0259ziyy\u0259tini \u00f6yr\u0259ndikc\u0259 q\u0131z\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259ki nisgilin s\u0259b\u0259bini anlad\u0131. \u018fslind\u0259, Xalid\u0259ni g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fc g\u00fcnd\u0259n ona vurulmu\u015fdu. G\u00f6rm\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259ri q\u0131z\u0131 axtar\u0131r, tapmayanda vurnuxa-vurnuxa qal\u0131r, qar\u015f\u0131la\u015fanda \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 rahatl\u0131q tap\u0131rd\u0131. Xalid\u0259nin bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131 q\u0259lbin\u0259 xo\u015f bir istilik yay\u0131r, q\u0259lbi titr\u0259yirdi. B\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar\u0131 biruz\u0259 verm\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fsa da, gec\u0259l\u0259r q\u0131z\u0131n\u0131 ba\u011fr\u0131na bas\u0131b yatanda, yan\u0131ndak\u0131 bo\u015fluqda Xalid\u0259ni g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fc. Xalid\u0259 is\u0259 bunlardan x\u0259b\u0259rsiz, \u00f6z i\u015find\u0259-g\u00fcc\u00fcnd\u0259 idi. Art\u0131q bu g\u00fcn ehtiyac onu \u015eahinin ota\u011f\u0131na q\u0259d\u0259r \u00e7\u0259kib g\u0259tirmi\u015fdi.<\/p>\n

-Xalid\u0259, borc ver\u0259c\u0259y\u0259m,\u00a0 amma \u0259m\u0259k haqq\u0131ndan tutulmamaq \u015f\u0259rti il\u0259. N\u0259 vaxt pulun olsa qaytararsan.<\/p>\n

-Yox, \u015eahin m\u00fc\u0259llim, m\u0259nim bu q\u0259d\u0259r pulum he\u00e7 vaxt olmayacaq.<\/p>\n

-Onda \u0259m\u0259k haqq\u0131n\u0131n bir qismini \u00f6d\u0259y\u0259rs\u0259n, bir qismini d\u0259 ail\u0259 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn x\u0259rcl\u0259y\u0259rs\u0259n, yoxsa siz\u0259 a\u011f\u0131r olar.<\/p>\n

Xalid\u0259 sevincini gizl\u0259d\u0259 bilm\u0259di:<\/p>\n

-Allah balan\u0131z\u0131 saxlas\u0131n, bilmir\u0259m siz\u0259 nec\u0259 t\u0259\u015f\u0259kk\u00fcr edim.<\/p>\n

-M\u0259n n\u0259 etdim ki, bel\u0259 deyirs\u0259n, \u00f6z z\u0259hm\u0259t haqq\u0131nla atan\u0131 \u0259m\u0259liyyat etdir\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259n. Qoy bunun \u0259v\u0259zind\u0259 d\u0259 Allah s\u0259n\u0259 xo\u015fb\u0259xtlik qism\u0259t etsin.<\/p>\n

-\u00c7ox sa\u011folun, bu yax\u015f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 he\u00e7 vaxt unutmayaca\u011fam-q\u0131z s\u00f6hb\u0259ti uzatmadan ota\u011f\u0131 t\u0259rk etdi. \u015eahin aya\u011fa duranda g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 masan\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259ki \u0259l yayl\u0131\u011f\u0131 sata\u015fd\u0131. B\u00fck\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f ya\u015f d\u0259smal\u0131 \u0259lin\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fc. Xalid\u0259nin g\u00f6z ya\u015flar\u0131 il\u0259 islanm\u0131\u015f yayl\u0131q \u015eahin\u0259 o q\u0259d\u0259r do\u011fma g\u0259ldi ki, onu, \u0259ll\u0259riyl\u0259 s\u0131\u011fallay\u0131b g\u00f6zl\u0259rinin \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 qoydu.\u00a0 Sin\u0259sind\u0259 \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131nan \u00fcr\u0259yi el\u0259 bil ona: “S\u0259n Xalid\u0259ni sevirs\u0259n”-deyirdi.\u00a0 D\u0259smal\u0131\u00a0 \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259n \u00e7\u0259kib, ehtiyatla masan\u0131n siyirm\u0259sin\u0259 qoydu.<\/p>\n

Atas\u0131 \u0259m\u0259liyyatdan \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. H\u0259kiml\u0259rin dediyin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259\u00a0 art\u0131q “y\u00f6n\u00fc b\u0259ri idi”. Xalid\u0259 sevginin, m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259tin n\u0259 oldu\u011funu v\u0259 sevm\u0259yin dad\u0131n\u0131 h\u0259l\u0259 duymma\u0131\u015fd\u0131. daha do\u011frusu ona vaxt ay\u0131ra bilm\u0259mi\u015fdi. V\u0259 q\u0259fl\u0259t\u0259n: “S\u0259ninl\u0259 evl\u0259nm\u0259k ist\u0259yir\u0259m, s\u0259ni sevir\u0259m” – dey\u0259n \u015eahinin s\u0259si qulaqlar\u0131nda notlar\u0131 bir-birin\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fan musiqi kimi s\u0259sl\u0259ndi. Nahar fasil\u0259sin\u0259 yax\u0131n \u015eahin onu yan\u0131na \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rtd\u0131rm\u0131\u015f v\u0259 \u0259lind\u0259ki \u0259l yayl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 q\u0131za uzadaraq: \u201cBurda unudub qoymusan. H\u0259m d\u0259 ya\u015f idi, a\u011flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131n h\u0259min g\u00fcn.\u00a0 Ne\u00e7\u0259 vaxtd\u0131r bu d\u0259smalla d\u0259rdl\u0259\u015fir\u0259m. \u00dcr\u0259yim\u0259 yatm\u0131san, bir-birimizi tan\u0131y\u0131r\u0131q. S\u0259n m\u0259nin x\u0259yallar\u0131mda ail\u0259 quraca\u011f\u0131m xan\u0131msan. \u018fsas \u015f\u0259rt bunlar deyil, h\u0259md\u0259 s\u0259ni sevir\u0259m\u201d.<\/p>\n

-Ax\u0131 m\u0259nim… M\u0259n…<\/p>\n

-Bilir\u0259m ail\u0259nizi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrs\u0259n. H\u0259r \u015fey yerin\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259c\u0259k, art\u0131q atan yax\u015f\u0131la\u015f\u0131r, i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k, anan\u0131 da i\u015f\u0259 d\u00fcz\u0259ld\u0259rik. S\u0259n d\u0259 k\u00f6m\u0259k ed\u0259rs\u0259n.\u00a0 Xalid\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 sal\u0131b n\u0259 dey\u0259c\u0259yini bilmirdi.<\/p>\n

-M\u0259niml\u0259 evl\u0259nm\u0259y\u0259 raz\u0131sanm\u0131, Xalid\u0259!?<\/p>\n

-\u015eahin m\u00fc\u0259llim….<\/p>\n

-Xahi\u015f edir\u0259m ad\u0131m\u0131 de.<\/p>\n

-M\u0259n h\u0259l\u0259 haz\u0131r deyil\u0259m, bir ne\u00e7\u0259 g\u00fcn fikirl\u0259\u015fm\u0259liy\u0259m.<\/p>\n

-Eybi yoxdur fikirl\u0259\u015f. S\u0259nd\u0259n yax\u015f\u0131 cavab g\u00f6zl\u0259yir\u0259m.<\/p>\n

Otaqdan \u00e7\u0131xanda hiss etdi ki, ayaqlar\u0131 titr\u0259yir, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc birt\u0259h\u0259r \u0259l\u0259 al\u0131b, evl\u0259rin\u0259 qay\u0131td\u0131. Gec\u0259d\u0259n xeyli ke\u00e7\u0259n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc tavana zill\u0259yib xeyli fikirl\u0259\u015fdi: “Ax\u0131, m\u0259n sevmir\u0259m, ona buna nec\u0259 deyim? M\u0259n d\u0259 sev\u0259r\u0259k ail\u0259 qurmaq ist\u0259yir\u0259m. \u00fcr\u0259yimin s\u0259si, onun \u00fcr\u0259yinin s\u0259sin\u0259 hay vermir ax\u0131…” El\u0259 fikirl\u0259\u015f\u0259 -fikirl\u0259\u015f\u0259\u00a0 d\u0259 yuxuya getdi. N\u0259 i\u015fd\u0259, n\u0259 evd\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 yer tapa bilmirdi. “Bir q\u0259rara g\u0259lm\u0259liy\u0259m, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc f\u0259da etm\u0259k d\u0259 ist\u0259mir\u0259m, O, sevir, h\u0259m d\u0259 yax\u015f\u0131 insand\u0131r. Ham\u0131n\u0131n h\u00f6rm\u0259tini qazan\u0131b. “Yox ” des\u0259m ham\u0131 q\u0131nayacaq. Bundan art\u0131\u011f\u0131nam\u0131 ged\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259n, dey\u0259c\u0259kl\u0259r. Ax\u0131…ax\u0131 onu sevmir\u0259m. Q\u0259fild\u0259n el\u0259 bil g\u00fcc tapd\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259.<\/p>\n

T\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n bu ya\u015fda n\u0259 sevgi? Yox, ail\u0259 quracam onunla. M\u0259n sevms\u0259m d\u0259\u00a0 o m\u0259ni sevir.\u00a0 H\u0259m d\u0259 indiki z\u0259man\u0259d\u0259 bel\u0259 a\u011f\u0131ll\u0131-ba\u015fl\u0131\u00a0 adam \u00e7ox azd\u0131r. Allah bilir hans\u0131 s\u0259viyy\u0259siz\u0259 tu\u015f olaca\u011fam…\u201d<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

\u015eahin xo\u015fb\u0259xt idi.\u00a0 Xalid\u0259ni \u00e7ox sevirdi. Onun davran\u0131\u015f\u0131, Lal\u0259ni \u00f6z balas\u0131 kimi ba\u011fr\u0131na basmas\u0131, \u015eahin\u0259 d\u00fcnyan\u0131 b\u0259x\u015f etmi\u00e7di. Xalid\u0259nin \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 tez al\u0131\u015fd\u0131 \u015eahin\u0259. Meylini ona el\u0259 salmi\u015fd\u0131 ki, d\u00fcnya da\u011f\u0131lsayd\u0131 bel\u0259 ondan ayr\u0131lma\u011f\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnm\u0259zdi. Ail\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259 d\u0259 v\u0259ziyy\u0259t d\u00fcz\u0259lmi\u015fdi. Anas\u0131 i\u015fl\u0259yir, bac\u0131lar\u0131 v\u0259 qarda\u015f\u0131 da art\u0131q b\u00f6y\u00fcy\u00fcb ail\u0259y\u0259 k\u00f6m\u0259k edirdil\u0259r. Xalid\u0259 i\u015fd\u0259n ev\u0259 qay\u0131dan kimi Lal\u0259ni ba\u011fr\u0131na bas\u0131b ox\u015fay\u0131rd\u0131.\u00a0 Lal\u0259y\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259kd\u0259n ba\u011flanm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Onun b\u00fct\u00fcn ist\u0259kl\u0259rini yerin\u0259 yetirdikc\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 bir rahtal\u0131q tap\u0131rd\u0131. Sona m\u00fc\u0259llim\u0259 d\u0259 b\u0259y\u0259nmi\u015fdi Xalid\u0259ni. H\u0259rd\u0259n evl\u0259rin\u0259 qonaq g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259, ondan g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fc h\u00f6rm\u0259td\u0259n, Lal\u0259y\u0259 m\u00fcnasib\u0259tind\u0259n a\u011f\u0131zdolusu dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. Xalid\u0259nin hamil\u0259 oldu\u011funu e\u015fid\u0259nd\u0259 sevindiyi q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259 narahat olmu\u015fdu. \u201cG\u00f6r\u0259s\u0259n \u00f6z \u00f6vlad\u0131 olanda Lal\u0259y\u0259 \u00f6gey m\u00fcnasib\u0259t b\u0259sl\u0259m\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k ki?\u201d Q\u0259lbind\u0259n ke\u00e7\u0259nl\u0259ri \u00fcr\u0259yind\u0259 saxlaya bilm\u0259yib \u015eahin\u0259 s\u00f6yl\u0259di:<\/p>\n

-M\u0259n Xalid\u0259ni taniy\u0131ram, ana , onun ip\u0259k kimi yum\u015faq \u00fcr\u0259yi var. S\u0259n g\u00f6r\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259n o, Lal\u0259ni h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259ki kimi sev\u0259c\u0259kdir.<\/p>\n

-Allah el\u0259sin, m\u0259nim d\u0259 ist\u0259yim el\u0259 bu deyilmi? Bel\u0259 d\u0259 oldu. Xalid\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 ana oldu, o\u011flu d\u00fcnyaya g\u0259ldi. \u015eahinin dediyi kimi he\u00e7 n\u0259 d\u0259yi\u015fm\u0259di. \u00c7\u00fcnki q\u0259lbind\u0259ki ilk anal\u0131q sevgisini Lal\u0259d\u0259 tapm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 v\u0259 o\u011flu Elnurla bu sevgi davam edirdi.<\/p>\n

\u015eahin Xalid\u0259 il\u0259 ail\u0259 qurmaqla, sevgisini, s\u0259ad\u0259tini tapm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u0130sti oca\u011f\u0131, g\u00f6z\u0259l ail\u0259si var idi. Xo\u015fb\u0259xt \u0259r, g\u00f6z\u0259l ata idi. \u00dcr\u0259yind\u0259 Allah\u0131na \u015f\u00fck\u00fcr edir,\u201d bundan art\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ist\u0259mir\u0259m, verdikl\u0259rin b\u0259simdir. M\u0259nim xo\u015fb\u0259xtliyimi \u00f6z\u00fcn qoru Allah\u0131m\u201d- deyirdi.<\/p>\n

\u018flyar xeyli vaxtdan b\u0259ri \u015eahinl\u0259 bir yerd\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. Q\u0259fil bir s\u0259hvin ucbat\u0131ndan evl\u0259nm\u015fdi. Nifr\u0259t etdiyi bir qad\u0131nla \u00f6m\u00fcr s\u00fcr\u00fcrd\u00fc, daha do\u011frusu \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn dediyi kimi \u00f6mr\u00fcn\u00fc \u00e7\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fcrd\u00fc. \u00d6vladlar\u0131 b\u00f6y\u00fck idi. Anan\u0131n s\u00f6z\u00fc ke\u00e7\u0259rli oldu\u011fundan \u00f6vladlar\u0131 da ona bigan\u0259 m\u00fcnasib\u0259t b\u0259sl\u0259yir,\u00a0 bir s\u00f6zl\u0259,\u00a0 onun dediyi kimi h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259t etmirdi\u0259r. \u015eahinl\u0259 ya\u015f\u0131d olsalar da sa\u00e7lar\u0131na vaxts\u0131z d\u0259n d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f, ondan xeyli ya\u015fl\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc. D\u0259rdl\u0259rini \u015eahinl\u0259 b\u00f6l\u0259r, h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259n k\u0259d\u0259r ya\u011fard\u0131. Boy-buxunlu, yara\u015f\u0131ql\u0131, istiqanl\u0131 adam idi. \u0130\u015fd\u0259 sevildiyi q\u0259d\u0259r ail\u0259d\u0259 sevilmirdi. Evin\u0259 \u00e7atan kimi s\u00f6z-s\u00f6hb\u0259t, q\u0131\u015fq\u0131r\u0131q bezdirmi\u015fdi \u018flyar\u0131. Bir xo\u015f bax\u0131\u015fa, \u015firin g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u0259, mehriban s\u0259s\u0259 el\u0259 ehtiyac\u0131 var idi ki, amma onu n\u0259 vaxtsa tapaca\u011f\u0131na\u00a0 \u00fcmidi yox idi. \u0130lk g\u00fcnd\u0259n vurulmu\u015fdu Xalid\u0259y\u0259.\u00a0 Q\u0259lbind\u0259 onun sevgisi il\u0259 ya\u015fay\u0131r, g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259ri g\u00fcl\u00fcr, h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131n \u0259n xo\u015fb\u0259xt anlar\u0131n\u0131 ya\u015fay\u0131rd\u0131. Amma ona yax\u0131nla\u015f\u0131b: \u201cS\u0259ni sevir\u0259m\u201d- dey\u0259 bilm\u0259zdi, bilirdi ki, bu ba\u015f tutan sevgi deyil. Sad\u0259c\u0259 olaraq yuxular\u0131nda, x\u0259yallar\u0131nda, q\u0259lbinin d\u0259rinlikl\u0259rdind\u0259 g\u0259zdirdiyi bu e\u015fq, bu sevgi onu ya\u015fad\u0131rd\u0131. \u015eahinl\u0259 Xalid\u0259 evl\u0259n\u0259nd\u0259, sakitc\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kilib h\u00f6nk\u00fcr-h\u00f6nk\u00fcr a\u011flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Bir ne\u00e7\u0259 vaxt \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259 builm\u0259y\u0259n \u018flyar, ist\u0259yind\u0259n \u0259l \u00e7\u0259km\u0259yib, Xalid\u0259nin x\u0259yal\u0131 il\u0259 ya\u015fay\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Xalid\u0259 d\u0259 ilk g\u00fcnl\u0259rd\u0259n duymu\u015fdu bu m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259ti. Onun da q\u0259lbinin d\u0259rinliyind\u0259 bir sevgi k\u00f6z\u0259rtisi vard\u0131. Qar\u015f\u0131la\u015fanda yanaqlar\u0131 od tutub yan\u0131r, salam verib, salam alanda v\u00fccudunda bir titr\u0259yi\u015f hiss edirdi. Bunlar\u0131n m\u0259nas\u0131n\u0131 bilirdi. Hiss edirdi ki, o da \u018flyar\u0131 sevir. Amma onun ail\u0259si oldu\u011funu da bilirdi. Ona g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 i\u00e7ind\u0259 yanan bu sevgi q\u0131\u011f\u0131lc\u0131mlar\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259fn ed\u0259r\u0259k, \u015eahinl\u0259 ail\u0259 qurma\u011f\u0131 \u00fcst\u00fcn tutmu\u015fdu. He\u00e7 vaxt aralar\u0131nda bu bar\u0259d\u0259 s\u00f6hb\u0259t olmam\u0131\u015f, salamdan ba\u015fqa\u00a0 bir-birl\u0259rin\u0259 bir k\u0259lm\u0259 s\u00f6z dem\u0259mi\u015fdil\u0259r. Amma h\u0259r ikisin\u0259\u00a0 b\u0259lli idi ki, sevirl\u0259r bir-birl\u0259rini, \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 \u00e7\u0131l\u011f\u0131n bir m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259tl\u0259… Bu sevgini h\u0259r ikisi \u00fcr\u0259kl\u0259rind\u0259 d\u0259fn etm\u0259y\u0259 m\u0259cbur idil\u0259r, amma s\u00f6zs\u00fcz \u00fcr\u0259kl\u0259rind\u0259 g\u0259zdirdikl\u0259ri bu m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259t s\u00f6nm\u0259k bilmirdi. El\u0259 bu m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259tin k\u00fcl alt\u0131ndak\u0131 q\u0131\u011f\u0131lc\u0131mlar\u0131\u00a0 \u018flyar\u0131 yolundan d\u00f6nd\u0259rdi, el\u0259 bil d\u0259yi\u015fdirib ba\u015fqa adam el\u0259di onu…<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

H\u0259rd\u0259n i\u015fl\u0259 ba\u011fl\u0131 b\u00f6lg\u0259l\u0259r\u0259 gedirdil\u0259r. N\u00f6vb\u0259ti d\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n birind\u0259 \u018flyarla Xalid\u0259 getm\u0259li oldular. \u015eahin \u018flyar\u0131 ill\u0259rd\u0259n b\u0259ri tan\u0131y\u0131rd\u0131, ona g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131n\u0131 ona etibar etdi. \u0130\u015fl\u0259rini yekunla\u015fd\u0131r\u0131b, ki\u00e7ik bir kafed\u0259 nahar etm\u0259li olanda \u018flyar: \u201cXalid\u0259, \u00e7\u0131xaq t\u0259bi\u0259tin qoynunda sakit bir yerd\u0259 oturaq\u201d-dedi. Xalid\u0259 raz\u0131la\u015fd\u0131. \u018flyar onunla \u00fcz-\u00fcz\u0259 he\u00e7 vaxt oturmam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Bu g\u00fcn d\u00fcnyan\u0131n \u0259n xo\u015fb\u0259xti san\u0131rd\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc. Me\u015f\u0259nin sakitliyi, t\u0259bi\u0259tin g\u00f6z\u0259lliyi v\u0259 sevdiyi qad\u0131n! Unutmu\u015fdu \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc, \u0259li d\u00fcnyan\u0131n \u0259t\u0259yind\u0259n \u00fcz\u00fclm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc el\u0259 bil. Bird\u0259n qeyri-ixtiyari olaraq \u0259ll\u0259rind\u0259n tutdu Xalid\u0259nin. Xalid\u0259 \u0259ll\u0259rini geri \u00e7\u0259kib: \u201c\u018flyar, s\u0259n n\u0259 etdiyini bilirs\u0259nmi, m\u0259n evli bir qad\u0131nam\u201d-dedi.<\/p>\n

-M\u0259n d\u0259 evli bir ki\u015fiy\u0259m, amma sevirik bir-birimizi.\u00a0 M\u0259n s\u0259ni sevdiyim kimi s\u0259n d\u0259 m\u0259ni sevirs\u0259n! \u0130ll\u0259rdi q\u0259lbimizid\u0259 gizl\u0259tdiyimiz bu m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259ti niy\u0259 etiraf etm\u0259k ist\u0259mirs\u0259n ax\u0131?<\/p>\n

-Yox, \u018flyar , s\u0259n yalan deyirs\u0259n! M\u0259n, m\u0259n …<\/p>\n

-M\u0259ni sevirs\u0259n,\u00a0 amma bir-birimiz\u0259 qism\u0259t deyilik.<\/p>\n

-M\u0259ni burax, \u018flyar. Q\u0131\u015fq\u0131raram!..<\/p>\n

-\u0130st\u0259yirs\u0259n d\u00fcnyaya s\u0259s sal, ne\u00e7\u0259 ildir sev\u0259-sev\u0259\u00a0 qa\u00e7\u0131rsan m\u0259nd\u0259n! Amma bu g\u00fcn yan\u0131mdasan!!!<\/p>\n

-Yalvar\u0131ram, \u018flyar, \u015eahin yax\u015f\u0131 h\u0259yat yolda\u015f\u0131d\u0131r. M\u0259ni r\u00fcsvay etm\u0259, \u00f6vldlar\u0131m\u0131z var…<\/p>\n

\u018flyar\u0131n onu buraxmaq fikri yox idi. G\u00fccl\u00fc qollar\u0131 il\u0259 g\u0259lini sin\u0259sin\u0259 s\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. H\u0259r ikisi at\u0259\u015f i\u00e7ind\u0259 yan\u0131rd\u0131lar.<\/p>\n

-G\u00fccl\u0259 qovu\u015fmaq olmaz, \u018flyar, n\u0259 olar burax m\u0259ni, s\u0259ni \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u0259r\u0259m…<\/p>\n

-Bacarmazsan, \u00e7\u00fcnki sevirs\u0259n m\u0259ni!!!<\/p>\n

Ba\u011f\u0131rmaq, q\u0131\u015fq\u0131r\u0131b yalvarmaq z\u0259rif v\u00fccudlu Xalid\u0259nin haray\u0131na \u00e7atmad\u0131. Yol boyu h\u0259r ikisi vicdan \u0259zab\u0131 \u00e7\u0259kirdi. Dili s\u00f6z tutmayan Xalid\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yind\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr-qoy edirdi: \u201cEvim\u0259 nec\u0259 gedim. X\u0259yan\u0259t etdiyim \u015eahinin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 nec\u0259 bax\u0131m!..\u201d\u00a0 \u00c7\u0131x\u0131\u015f yolu tapa bilmirdi. \u201cBir anl\u0131q xo\u015fb\u0259xtlik \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ne\u00e7\u0259 illik dostuma niy\u0259 x\u0259yan\u0259t etdim? O Xalid\u0259ni m\u0259n\u0259 etibar etmi\u015fdi. M\u0259n \u0259claf\u0131n biriymi\u015f\u0259m\u201d- \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc danlasa da , \u018flyar\u0131n q\u0259lbind\u0259 bir rahatl\u0131q hissi var idi…<\/p>\n

Evd\u0259 \u00e7iyinl\u0259rind\u0259ki x\u0259cal\u0259t y\u00fck\u00fcn\u00fcn a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 gizl\u0259tm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fsa da, m\u0259yuslu\u011fu \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259n\u00a0 oxunurdu. \u015eahin bunu ani bir bax\u0131\u015fla da sezm\u0259kd\u0259 idi<\/p>\n

-Xalid\u0259, g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 bir t\u0259h\u0259r g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrs\u0259n, s\u0259n\u0259 n\u0259 olub?<\/p>\n

-He\u00e7 n\u0259 olmay\u0131b, \u015eahin, bir az a\u011fr\u0131lar\u0131m var.<\/p>\n

-H\u0259kim\u0259 apar\u0131m s\u0259ni…<\/p>\n

-Yox, yox \u00f6t\u00fcb ke\u00e7\u0259r-demi\u015fdi Xalid\u0259!<\/p>\n

Amma n\u0259 \u00f6t\u00fcr, n\u0259 d\u0259 ke\u00e7irdi bu a\u011fr\u0131-ac\u0131lar. \u0130\u00e7ind\u0259 bir qisas hissi alovlan\u0131rd\u0131. \u201cOnu \u00f6ld\u00fcrs\u0259m d\u0259 uf dem\u0259r\u0259m, yox, \u00f6l\u00fcm asan bir i\u015fdir, ona el\u0259 bir yara vurmal\u0131yam ki, h\u0259r d\u0259f\u0259 o yaran\u0131 g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 vicdan \u0259zab\u0131 \u00e7\u0259ksin!\u201d -dey\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u0259rk\u0259n, \u015eahin\u0259 q\u0131s\u0131l\u0131r, onun k\u00f6ks\u00fcnd\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 s\u0131\u011f\u0131nacaq yeri axtar\u0131rd\u0131. Xalid\u0259 qisas\u0131n\u0131 n\u0259 vaxt alaca\u011f\u0131na \u0259min idi.<\/p>\n

\u018flyar da dey\u0259s\u0259n pe\u015fiman idi. \u0130\u015fd\u0259 \u015eahind\u0259n v\u0259 Xalid\u0259d\u0259n gizl\u0259nm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r, o \u0259hvalat yad\u0131na d\u00fc\u015f\u0259nd\u0259 gec\u0259l\u0259r g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 yuxu getmirdi. \u201c\u018fg\u0259r \u015eahin bils\u0259, bir ail\u0259nin faci\u0259si ba\u015flayar, m\u0259n niy\u0259 bel\u0259 etdim…\u201d Ancaq v\u00fcsal dolu o anlar\u0131n \u015firinliyini x\u0259yal\u0259n t\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n ya\u015fayanda h\u0259r \u015fey yad\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131. Xalid\u0259 il\u0259 rastla\u015fanda qad\u0131n\u0131n nifr\u0259t dolu bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131 q\u0259lbini par\u00e7alasa da, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc birt\u0259h\u0259r \u0259l\u0259 al\u0131r, sonra da qad\u0131ndan uzaqla\u015f\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n

-Salam, \u018flyar, dayan, s\u0259n\u0259 s\u00f6z\u00fcm var- Xalid\u0259 idi.<\/p>\n

Aradan d\u00f6rd-be\u015f il ke\u00e7mi\u015fdi. Bu ill\u0259r \u0259rzind\u0259 bir d\u0259f\u0259 d\u0259 olsun Xalid\u0259 ona salam verm\u0259mi\u015fdi. B\u0259s indi? \u00dcz\u00fcnd\u0259 bir t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm var idi Xalid\u0259nin.<\/p>\n

-Xalid\u0259 , sa-aa-lam..<\/p>\n

-\u018flyar, yenid\u0259n o m\u0259kana ged\u0259rs\u0259nmi m\u0259niml\u0259? O \u015firin anlar\u0131 yendi\u0259n ya\u015famaq ist\u0259yir\u0259m.<\/p>\n

\u018flyar \u00e7a\u015fq\u0131nl\u0131qla Xalid\u0259nin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxd\u0131.<\/p>\n

-Niy\u0259 bel\u0259 bax\u0131rsan, biz ax\u0131 bir-birimizi sevirik.<\/p>\n

-Ax\u0131, Xalid\u0259, bird\u0259n \u015eahin bil\u0259r, m\u0259n, m\u0259n…<\/p>\n

-Dem\u0259li s\u0259nin sevgin bir anl\u0131q imi\u015f, h\u0259?<\/p>\n

\u00dcr\u0259kl\u0259ndi \u018flyar, Xalid\u0259nin \u00e7\u00f6hr\u0259sind\u0259ki t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm \u00fcr\u0259yin\u0259 ya\u011f kimi yay\u0131ld\u0131.<\/p>\n

-S\u0259ni sevdiyim kimi he\u00e7 kimi sevm\u0259mi\u015f\u0259m. S\u0259n h\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131n bir par\u00e7as\u0131 deyils\u0259nmi?<\/p>\n

-Bunlar\u0131 orda dey\u0259rs\u0259n. Planla\u015fd\u0131r s\u0259h\u0259r tezd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xaq.<\/p>\n

Sevincind\u0259n \u0259ll\u0259ri, dizl\u0259ri titr\u0259y\u0259n \u018flyar\u0131n ehtirasdan g\u00f6zl\u0259ri i\u015f\u0131ldad\u0131.<\/p>\n

-M\u0259nim g\u00f6zl\u0259rim \u00fcst\u0259! M\u0259n bunu \u00e7oxdan g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdim.<\/p>\n

-El\u0259mi, b\u0259s n\u0259 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn demirdin?!<\/p>\n

-Qorxurdum s\u0259nd\u0259n.<\/p>\n

-M\u0259nim n\u0259yimd\u0259n qorxurdun, sev\u0259n adam qorxaq olmaz. Bax m\u0259nim kimi g\u00f6r\u00fcrs\u0259n, m\u0259n he\u00e7 n\u0259d\u0259n qorxmuram…<\/p>\n

\u00dcz-\u00fcz\u0259, g\u00f6z-g\u00f6z\u0259 oturmu\u015fdular. H\u0259min yer, h\u0259min m\u0259kan idi. \u018flyar\u0131n dili a\u00e7\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. H\u0259yat\u0131ndan, i\u015find\u0259n dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. Xalid\u0259 yanaqlar\u0131n\u0131 \u0259ll\u0259rinin i\u00e7in\u0259 al\u0131b\u00a0 s\u0259birl\u0259 dinl\u0259yirdi \u018flyar\u0131. H\u0259rd\u0259n g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259yir, amma i\u00e7ind\u0259ki h\u0259y\u0259can bu t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm\u0259 mane olurdu. H\u0259rd\u0259n qa\u015flar\u0131 \u00e7at\u0131l\u0131r, bulud kimi dolur, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc birt\u0259h\u0259r \u0259l\u0259 alma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n

-Xalid\u0259, duraq bir az g\u0259z\u0259k, sonra yen\u0259 oturar\u0131q. Xalid\u0259 aya\u011fa durdu. \u018flyar onun \u0259ll\u0259rind\u0259n tutdu, oturduqlar\u0131 yerd\u0259n xeyli uzaqla\u015fd\u0131lar. Xalid\u0259 q\u0259fl\u0259t\u0259n \u018flyar\u0131n \u0259ll\u0259rini burax\u0131b paltar\u0131n\u0131n cibind\u0259 gizl\u0259tdiyi iri b\u0131\u00e7a\u011f\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xararaq onun sin\u0259sin\u0259 dir\u0259di. G\u00f6zl\u0259ri h\u0259d\u0259q\u0259sind\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xan \u018flyar k\u0259k\u0259l\u0259di:<\/p>\n

-Xalid\u0259, s\u0259n, s\u0259n… M\u0259ni \u00f6ld\u00fcrm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnm\u00fc bura \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131n?!<\/p>\n

Xalid\u0259nin g\u00f6zl\u0259rini qan \u00f6rtm\u00fc\u015f, qeybd\u0259n qollar\u0131na g\u00fcc g\u0259lmi\u015fdi el\u0259 bil.<\/p>\n

-Yox , \u018flyar, s\u0259n \u00f6l\u00fcm\u0259 layiq deyils\u0259n. S\u0259n m\u0259nin \u0259rim\u0259 x\u0259yan\u0259t etdin! S\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 bir yara vuraca\u011fam ki,\u00a0 \u00f6m\u00fcrl\u00fck onun izini da\u015f\u0131yacaqsan.<\/p>\n

-Xalid\u0259, Xalid\u0259 … s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn arxas\u0131n\u0131 dem\u0259y\u0259 macal tapmam\u0131\u015f, sif\u0259tin\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kil\u0259n b\u0131\u00e7a\u011f\u0131n a\u00e7d\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u015f\u0131r\u0131mdan s\u00fcz\u00fcl\u00fcb sin\u0259sin\u0259 t\u00f6k\u00fcl\u0259n qan\u0131 g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 yer-g\u00f6y ba\u015f\u0131na f\u0131rland\u0131. Xalid\u0259 \u00e7iyinl\u0259rind\u0259n a\u011f\u0131r y\u00fck g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcl\u0259n adamlar kimi xeyli rahat idi. T\u0259l\u0259m-t\u0259l\u0259sik i\u015f yerin\u0259 g\u0259ls\u0259 d\u0259 idar\u0259d\u0259 oturma\u011fa s\u0259bri \u00e7atmad\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan qap\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131. Daha yad\u0131na he\u00e7 n\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fcrd\u00fc, el\u0259 bil t\u0259z\u0259c\u0259 azadl\u0131\u011fa \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131…<\/p>\n

* * *<\/p>\n

\u018flyar \u0259lini sif\u0259tind\u0259ki qanl\u0131 yaran\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 bas\u0131b a\u011fac\u0131n alt\u0131ndak\u0131 ma\u015f\u0131na t\u0259r\u0259f qa\u00e7d\u0131, Xalid\u0259ni burada g\u00f6rm\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 hal\u0131 bir az da psil\u0259\u015fdi. Ma\u015f\u0131ndak\u0131 \u201capte\u00e7ka\u201dn\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcn qan\u0131n\u0131 t\u0259mizl\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259n\u00a0 sonra yaras\u0131n\u0131 birt\u0259h\u0259r sar\u0131d\u0131. \u201cS\u0259n n\u0259 etdin Xalid\u0259, indi m\u0259n d\u0259rdimi kim\u0259 a\u00e7\u0131b dan\u0131\u015f\u0131m? S\u0259n\u0259 yalvar\u0131b dedim ki, m\u0259ni ba\u011f\u0131\u015fla, q\u0259bul etm\u0259din. Sonra da ki, bel\u0259…\u201d \u00d6z\u00fcn\u00fc danlasa da , art\u0131q olan olmu\u015fdu. Ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131 birt\u0259h\u0259r s\u00fcr\u00fcb ev\u0259 qay\u0131td\u0131. Onun misgin v\u0259ziyy\u0259tini g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 arvad\u0131 dizl\u0259rin\u0259\u00a0 \u015fapp\u0131ldatd\u0131:<\/p>\n

-\u018flyar, niy\u0259 bu k\u00f6k\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fcs\u0259n, sif\u0259tin\u0259 n\u0259 olub?<\/p>\n

-Ma\u015f\u0131n yoldan \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc saxlaya bilm\u0259dim, y\u0131x\u0131landa d\u0259mir \u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fc k\u0259sdi- dedi v\u0259 yalan dan\u0131\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131na g\u00f6r\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259 bir q\u0131zart\u0131 peyda oldu.<\/p>\n

-Bel\u0259 olmaz, h\u0259kim\u0259 getm\u0259k laz\u0131md\u0131r.<\/p>\n

-Yox, \u00f6z\u00fcm sar\u0131m\u0131\u015fam-ani olaraq d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc ki, \u201ch\u0259kim yaran\u0131n b\u0131\u00e7aq yaras\u0131 oldu\u011funu d\u0259rhal bil\u0259c\u0259kdir\u201d. Qorxma, bir m\u00fcdd\u0259t evd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xmaram, sa\u011fal\u0131b ged\u0259r.<\/p>\n

\u018flyar\u0131n he\u00e7 bir s\u0259b\u0259b olmadan i\u015fd\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u0259m\u0259si \u015eahini narahat etdi. Z\u0259ng edib hal\u0131n\u0131 soru\u015fanda, evd\u0259 uydurub arvad\u0131na s\u00f6yl\u0259diyi yalan\u0131 ona da dan\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u015eahin onu yoxlama\u011fa g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 \u00e7a\u015f\u0131b qald\u0131.<\/p>\n

-S\u0259n ki, rahat ma\u015f\u0131n s\u00fcr\u0259n idin, b\u0259s bu nec\u0259 ba\u015f verdi?<\/p>\n

-Bir az yuxulu idim-deyib i\u00e7ind\u0259ki t\u0259la\u015f\u0131 gizl\u0259tm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Art\u0131q Xalid\u0259nin dincliyi geriy\u0259 qay\u0131tm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. El\u0259 bil ruhu bir az da t\u0259mizl\u0259nmi\u015f, x\u0259cal\u0259t hissind\u0259n yaxa qurtarm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Xeyli vaxtdan b\u0259ri qorxa-qorxa \u015eahinin g\u00f6zl\u0259rin\u0259 baxan Xalid\u0259, daha ondan uzaq qa\u00e7ma\u011fa\u00a0 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fm\u0131rd\u0131. Ancaq arabir i\u00e7ind\u0259ki x\u0259yan\u0259t adl\u0131 bir l\u0259k\u0259ni \u00f6m\u00fcrl\u00fck da\u015f\u0131yaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131\u00a0 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u0259nd\u0259 var\u0131ndan yox olurdu…<\/p>\n

…\u018flyar\u0131n yana\u011f\u0131nda eyb\u0259c\u0259r bir \u00e7ap\u0131q\u00a0 izi qalm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u015e\u00fcbh\u0259siz ki, h\u0259r d\u0259f\u0259 g\u00fczg\u00fcy\u0259 baxanda, bu yara izi ona n\u0259yi is\u0259 xatr\u0131rladacaq idi. \u018fslind\u0259,\u00a0 \u00fcr\u0259kl\u0259rind\u0259 g\u0259zdirdikl\u0259ri gizli m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259tin, a\u011f\u0131ls\u0131z sevginin ac\u0131 yaralar\u0131 onlar\u0131n h\u0259r ikisini \u00f6m\u00fcrl\u00fck a\u011fr\u0131dacaq q\u0259d\u0259r g\u00fccl\u00fc idi…<\/p>\n

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Yaz\u0131ya 1076 d\u0259f\u0259 bax\u0131l\u0131b<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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