{"id":12783,"date":"2019-06-25T16:37:33","date_gmt":"2019-06-25T11:37:33","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=12783"},"modified":"2019-06-25T16:37:33","modified_gmt":"2019-06-25T11:37:33","slug":"aksin-x%c9%99yal-poctalyon-hekay%c9%99","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=12783","title":{"rendered":"Ak\u015fin X\u0259yal – Po\u00e7talyon ( Hekay\u0259)"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"36861890_353120681890027_7463987397567447040_n\"<\/a>\u00c7\u00f6ld\u0259n ayaq s\u0259sl\u0259ri e\u015fidib, \u0259limd\u0259ki t\u0259z\u0259 s\u00fczd\u00fcy\u00fcm \u00e7ay\u0131 taxtadan d\u00fcz\u0259lib, r\u0259ngl\u0259nm\u0259mi\u015f stolun \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 qoyub, p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259nin \u00e7irkli \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259sind\u0259n boyland\u0131msa da, he\u00e7 kimi g\u00f6r\u0259 bilm\u0259dim. Oturub \u00e7ay\u0131m\u0131 \u00fcf\u00fcr\u0259-\u00fcf\u00fcr\u0259 qurtumlama\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131m. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 k\u00fcl\u0259k n\u0259yis\u0259 tapp\u0131ldatm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u0130nanm\u0131ram ki, bu havada kims\u0259 q\u0259br ziyar\u0259tin\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259. Bu q\u0131\u015f dem\u0259k olar ki, he\u00e7 ya\u011f\u0131nt\u0131 olmam\u0131\u015f, quru, \u015faxtal\u0131 v\u0259 k\u00fcl\u0259kli bir hava h\u00f6km s\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc. El\u0259 indi d\u0259 g\u00fcn\u0259\u015f yalandan par\u0131ldasa da, \u00e7\u00f6ld\u0259 \u015faxtadan be\u015f d\u0259qiq\u0259 bel\u0259 dayanmaq m\u00fcmk\u00fcn deyil.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00c7ay\u0131m\u0131 i\u00e7ib biraz uzanmaq ist\u0259yirdim, amma fikrim qald\u0131 bayaqk\u0131 ayaq s\u0259sind\u0259. B\u0259lk\u0259 el\u0259 o\u011furlu\u011fa g\u0259libl\u0259r. \u00c7\u00fcnki bir ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u0259f\u0259 burada o\u011furlu\u011fa c\u0259hd ed\u0259nl\u0259r olmu\u015fdu. Odur ki, uzanmaq fikrimd\u0259n da\u015f\u0131n\u0131b, k\u00fcrk\u00fcm\u00fc geyinib, papa\u011f\u0131m\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131ma qoyub \u00e7\u00f6l\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131m. Q\u0259birl\u0259rin aras\u0131na g\u00f6z g\u0259zdirdim v\u0259 q\u0259birstanl\u0131\u011f\u0131n k\u00f6hn\u0259 q\u0259birl\u0259r adlanan hiss\u0259sind\u0259 g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 bir qaralt\u0131 d\u0259ydi. \u201cBu k\u00fcl\u0259kd\u0259, \u015faxtada kimdir bel\u0259 q\u0259bir ziyar\u0259tin\u0259 g\u0259lib\u201d-dey\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u0259r\u0259k, k\u00fcrk\u00fcm\u00fcn boyunlu\u011funu qald\u0131r\u0131b, \u0259ll\u0259rimi cibim\u0259 qoyaraq, q\u0259birl\u0259rin aras\u0131 il\u0259 h\u0259min istiqam\u0259t\u0259 do\u011fru add\u0131mlad\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Yax\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131qda h\u0259min qaralt\u0131n\u0131n kim oldu\u011funu tan\u0131d\u0131m. Burda g\u00f6z\u0259t\u00e7i i\u015fl\u0259diyim bu be\u015f il m\u00fcdd\u0259tind\u0259 bu adam\u0131 tez-tez g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fcm. Yetmi\u015fd\u0259n \u00e7ox ya\u015f\u0131 olan bu qoca dem\u0259k olar ki, ayda \u00fc\u00e7-d\u00f6rd d\u0259f\u0259 g\u0259lir, k\u00f6hn\u0259 v\u0259 ads\u0131z bir q\u0259brin \u0259traf\u0131n\u0131 t\u0259mizl\u0259yir, g\u0259tirdiyi \u00e7i\u00e7\u0259kl\u0259ri q\u0259brin \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 d\u00fcz\u0259r\u0259k biraz oturub, sonra \u00a0\u00e7\u0131x\u0131b gedirdi. Amma bir aydan art\u0131q idi ki, g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u00fcrd\u00fc. \u0130ndi bu \u015faxtal\u0131, k\u00fcl\u0259kli havada yen\u0259 g\u0259lmi\u015fdi. Yax\u0131nla\u015f\u0131b yax\u0131nl\u0131qdak\u0131 q\u0259birl\u0259rin birinin hasar\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 oturub, ona baxma\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131m. Yerd\u0259ki yolunmu\u015f alaq otlar\u0131ndan bildim ki, m\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259n\u0259 kimi q\u0259brin \u0259traf\u0131n\u0131 t\u0259mizl\u0259mi\u015f, indi is\u0259 g\u0259tirdiyi g\u00fcll\u0259ri q\u0259brin \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 d\u00fcz\u0259r\u0259k, \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 yerd\u0259n y\u0131\u011fd\u0131\u011f\u0131 da\u015flardan qoyurdu ki, k\u00fcl\u0259k aparmas\u0131n. G\u00fcll\u0259ri d\u00fcz\u00fcb qurtarandan sonra q\u0131r\u0131\u015f\u0131b, ya\u015f\u0131l damarlar\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015f \u0259lini ba\u015f da\u015f\u0131n\u0131 \u0259v\u0259z ed\u0259n ki\u00e7ik da\u015f\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 qoyaraq bir ne\u00e7\u0259 c\u00fcml\u0259 n\u0259s\u0259 dey\u0259r\u0259k aya\u011fa durduqda m\u0259ni g\u00f6rd\u00fc. N\u0259mli g\u00f6zl\u0259riyl\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 baxaraq, g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcn\u00fcb salam verib yan\u0131mdan \u00f6t\u00fcb ke\u00e7di. Arxas\u0131nca baxd\u0131m. Qar\u015f\u0131dan \u0259s\u0259n k\u00fcl\u0259k ona ir\u0259lil\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 imkan vermirdi. Arabir h\u00fcd\u00fcrl\u00fcy\u00fc az qala iki metr\u0259 \u00e7atan m\u0259rm\u0259r ba\u015f da\u015f\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131n arxas\u0131na s\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131r, n\u0259f\u0259sin d\u0259rib, sonra yoluna davam etm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. \u00dcr\u0259yimd\u0259, \u201cqoca ki\u015fis\u0259n, ax\u0131 n\u0259 m\u0259cburdu bu soyuqda, \u015faxtada q\u0259bir ziyar\u0259tin\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259s\u0259n\u201d-deyib bir siqaret \u00e7\u0131xar\u0131b qoydum a\u011fz\u0131ma. Qar\u015f\u0131dan \u0259s\u0259n k\u00fcl\u0259k al\u0131\u015fqan\u0131 s\u00f6nd\u00fcrm\u0259sin dey\u0259, arxam\u0131 k\u00fcl\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7evirib siqaretimi yand\u0131r\u0131b geri \u00e7\u00f6nd\u00fckd\u0259 ki\u015fini g\u00f6rm\u0259dim. Getdiyi istiqam\u0259t\u0259 do\u011fru boyland\u0131msa da, yen\u0259 d\u0259 g\u00f6z\u0259 d\u0259ymirdi. \u0130ti add\u0131mlarla q\u0259birl\u0259rin aras\u0131yla qa\u00e7d\u0131m. N\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r axtarsam da, \u00a0g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 d\u0259ym\u0259di. Adam bird\u0259n bir\u0259 nec\u0259 yox ola bil\u0259rdi ax\u0131. Dayan\u0131b n\u0259f\u0259simi d\u0259r\u0259r\u0259k sa\u011fa, sola bax\u0131rd\u0131m ki, qula\u011f\u0131ma inilti s\u0259si g\u0259ldi. S\u0259s g\u0259l\u0259n t\u0259r\u0259f\u0259 boyland\u0131qda onun iki q\u0259brin aras\u0131ndak\u0131 dar c\u0131\u011f\u0131rda \u00fcz\u00fc \u00fcst\u0259 yer\u0259 uzand\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. D\u0259rhal \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc yetirib, \u00e7iyinl\u0259rind\u0259n tutub onu qald\u0131r\u0131b, da\u015f hasara s\u00f6yk\u0259dim. N\u0259f\u0259si gedib g\u0259ls\u0259 d\u0259, g\u00f6zl\u0259ri yar\u0131 qapan\u0131q haldayd\u0131. Aln\u0131 y\u0131x\u0131lark\u0259n harasa d\u0259yib s\u0131yr\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Qald\u0131r\u0131b g\u00f6z\u0259t\u00e7i m\u0259nt\u0259q\u0259m\u0259 aparmaq ist\u0259s\u0259m d\u0259, h\u0259m g\u00fcc\u00fcm \u00e7atmad\u0131, h\u0259m d\u0259 k\u00fcl\u0259k imkan verm\u0259di. Xo\u015fb\u0259xtlikd\u0259n biraz sonra \u00f6z\u00fc g\u00f6zl\u0259rini a\u00e7araq, aya\u011fa durma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Qoluna girib, aya\u011fa qalxmas\u0131na k\u00f6m\u0259k etdim. \u018fliyl\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 yax\u015f\u0131 oldu\u011funu i\u015far\u0259 edib, zorla g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcn\u0259r\u0259k add\u0131m atmaq ist\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259, el\u0259 ilk add\u0131mda yerind\u0259 s\u0259nd\u0259l\u0259di. Yenid\u0259n y\u0131x\u0131lmamas\u0131 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn d\u0259rhal qolundan tutdum. \u00d6z\u00fc getm\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 israr ets\u0259 d\u0259, birt\u0259h\u0259r dil\u0259 tutub onu g\u00f6z\u0259t\u00e7i m\u0259nt\u0259q\u0259m\u0259 g\u0259tir\u0259 bildim.<\/p>\n

Taxta d\u0259rman qutusundan yod, pamb\u0131q g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb aln\u0131n\u0131n qan\u0131n\u0131 sildim. \u0130sti bir \u00e7ay s\u00fcz\u00fcb qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131na qoydum. \u00d6z\u00fcms\u0259 taxta k\u0259tili \u00e7\u0259kib, onunla \u00fcz-\u00fcz\u0259 oturdum. Handan-hana \u00e7ay\u0131ndan bir qurtum i\u00e7ib:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00c7ox sa\u011f ol, ay o\u011ful,\u2013 dedi.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Bir \u015fey deyil, ay \u0259mi. Amma n\u0259 vacibdir ax\u0131 bu soyuqda, qiyam\u0259td\u0259 q\u0259bir ziyar\u0259tin\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259k.<\/p>\n

\u018flind\u0259ki st\u0259kan\u0131 yer\u0259 qoyub, aln\u0131n\u0131 ovxalayaraq:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ne\u00e7\u0259 ayd\u0131 x\u0259st\u0259ydim, yerd\u0259 yat\u0131rd\u0131m dey\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259 bilmirdim. Bu g\u00fcn g\u00f6rd\u00fcm bir az yax\u015f\u0131yam, ayaqlar\u0131m yer tutur, ona g\u00f6r\u0259 durub g\u0259ldim.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 N\u0259yinizdi r\u0259hm\u0259tlik?<\/p>\n

Ki\u015fi sanki sualdan diksin\u0259n kimi oldu. G\u00f6zl\u0259rini k\u00fcnc\u0259 zill\u0259yib, sakitc\u0259:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 He\u00e7 n\u0259yim,\u2013 dedi.<\/p>\n

Bir m\u00fcdd\u0259t n\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcs\u0259:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u018fslind\u0259 he\u00e7 n\u0259yim, amma h\u0259r \u015feyim,- dey\u0259 \u0259lav\u0259 etdi.<\/p>\n

Bir \u015fey ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259diyim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn g\u00f6zl\u0259rimi d\u00f6y\u0259-d\u00f6y\u0259 qalm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. N\u0259 dey\u0259c\u0259yimi, n\u0259 soru\u015faca\u011f\u0131m\u0131 da bilmirdim. Ki\u015fi durumumu anlay\u0131b, \u00f6z\u00fc m\u0259ni bu v\u0259ziyy\u0259td\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xard\u0131.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Bu m\u0259nim ill\u0259rdir q\u0259lbimd\u0259 da\u015f\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131m bir sirrimdir. \u0130ndiy\u0259d\u0259k kim\u0259s\u0259 dan\u0131\u015fmam\u0131\u015fam. \u00c7ay\u0131ndan bur qurtum i\u00e7ib, s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 davam el\u0259di: – Hiss edir\u0259m ki, \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u0259 \u00e7ox az qal\u0131b, odur ki, bu sirrimi kiml\u0259s\u0259 b\u00f6l\u00fc\u015fm\u0259k ist\u0259yir\u0259m ki, \u00f6z\u00fcml\u0259 q\u0259bir\u0259 aparmay\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Oturdu\u011fum taxta k\u0259tili biraz da ona yax\u0131n \u00e7\u0259kib:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 M\u0259mnuniyy\u0259tl\u0259 dinl\u0259r\u0259m,\u2013 dedim.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 1942-ci il, m\u00fcharib\u0259nin q\u0131z\u011f\u0131n vaxt\u0131 idi. Cavan idim, 19-20 ya\u015f\u0131m vard\u0131. \u00dcr\u0259yimd\u0259 anadang\u0259lm\u0259 q\u00fcsur oldu\u011fu \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn m\u0259ni aparmad\u0131lar c\u0259bh\u0259y\u0259. Bir tan\u0131\u015f\u0131m vasit\u0259si il\u0259 po\u00e7tlar\u0131n birind\u0259 po\u00e7talyon kimi i\u015f\u0259 d\u00fcz\u0259ldim. Maraql\u0131 bir pe\u015f\u0259ydi. H\u0259r g\u00fcn yeni insanlar tan\u0131y\u0131r,\u00a0 yeni simalar g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fcm. H\u0259r s\u0259h\u0259r m\u0259ktub dolu \u00e7antam\u0131 \u00e7iynim\u0259 tax\u0131b, Bak\u0131n\u0131n k\u00f6hn\u0259 k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259ri il\u0259 g\u0259zib, qap\u0131-qap\u0131 m\u0259ktub paylamaq x\u00fcsusi z\u00f6vq verirdi m\u0259n\u0259. Amma bu i\u015find\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 m\u0259xsus ac\u0131 ya\u015fadan t\u0259r\u0259fi vard\u0131 ki, o da \u00fc\u00e7k\u00fcnc \u201cqara m\u0259ktublar\u201d idi. H\u0259r g\u00fcn i\u015f\u0259 ged\u0259nd\u0259 yolda Allaha yalvar\u0131rd\u0131m ki, ka\u015f ki, bu g\u00fcn \u201cqara m\u0259ktub\u201d olmaya. Amma n\u0259 fayda, almanlar ir\u0259lil\u0259dikc\u0259 \u201cqara m\u0259ktub\u201dlar\u0131n da say\u0131 art\u0131rd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Yen\u0259 g\u00fcnl\u0259rd\u0259n bir g\u00fcn s\u0259h\u0259r m\u0259ktublar\u0131 ay\u0131r\u0131b \u00e7antama y\u0131\u011f\u0131rd\u0131m ki, g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 eyni adamdan g\u0259lm\u0259, amma f\u0259rqli \u00fcnvanlara g\u00f6nd\u0259rilmi\u015f iki m\u0259ktub d\u0259ydi. D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm ki, y\u0259qin n\u0259s\u0259 yanl\u0131\u015fl\u0131q var burda. \u018flq\u0259r\u0259z, m\u0259ktublar\u0131 \u00e7antama y\u0131\u011f\u0131b, furajkam\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131ma qoyub po\u00e7tdan \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131m. El\u0259 ilk h\u0259min o iki m\u0259ktubun \u00fcnvan\u0131n\u0131 tutub, Bak\u0131n\u0131n tozlu k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259ri il\u0259 ir\u0259lil\u0259dim. \u00d6hd\u0259liyim\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n \u0259razi \u0130\u00e7\u0259ri\u015f\u0259h\u0259rin \u0259traf\u0131ndak\u0131 m\u0259h\u0259ll\u0259l\u0259r idi. \u0130ndi o k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n \u0259s\u0259r-\u0259lam\u0259t d\u0259 qalmay\u0131b. \u00c7ox d\u0259yi\u015fib bu \u015f\u0259h\u0259r. H\u0259m g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fc\u015fc\u0259, h\u0259m d\u0259 xasiyy\u0259tc\u0259. O vaxt\u0131 Bak\u0131 \u00f6rp\u0259kli, ya\u015fmaql\u0131, h\u0259lim xasiyy\u0259tli g\u0259lin\u0259 b\u0259nz\u0259yirdi. \u0130ndi is\u0259 \u00fcz-g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 normadan art\u0131q makiyaj \u00e7\u0259kmi\u015f, s\u00fcni dodaqlar\u0131 olan, aqressiv xasiyy\u0259tli, h\u0259r g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcn\u0259 ayaqlar\u0131n\u0131 aralayan fahi\u015f\u0259l\u0259r\u0259 b\u0259nz\u0259yir. N\u0259inki \u015f\u0259h\u0259r, insanlar da s\u00fcnil\u0259\u015fib sanki. M\u00fcharib\u0259, acl\u0131q \u00e7\u0259tinlik d\u00f6vr\u00fc olsayd\u0131 da, insanlar\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259 bir g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f, t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm hiss olunurdu. K\u00fc\u00e7\u0259l\u0259r dolu olurdu g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u0259r\u0259k qa\u00e7\u0131\u015fan yar\u0131\u00e7\u0131lpaq u\u015faqlarla. \u0130ndi is\u0259 ham\u0131 sanki robotla\u015f\u0131b. Kim\u0259 baxrsan el\u0259 bil ki, eyni proqramla proqramla\u015fd\u0131r\u0131l\u0131blar. G\u00f6zl\u0259rd\u0259 k\u0259d\u0259r, \u00fczl\u0259r soluxmu\u015f, ba\u015flar a\u015fa\u011f\u0131, s\u0259h\u0259r i\u015f\u0259, ax\u015fam ev\u0259…\u00a0 Yar\u0131\u00e7\u0131lpaq u\u015faqlar\u0131 da yar\u0131\u00e7\u0131lpaq qad\u0131nlar, q\u0131zlar \u0259v\u0259zl\u0259yib. Deyirik z\u0259man\u0259 d\u0259yi\u015fib. \u018fslind\u0259 zaman sad\u0259c\u0259 t\u0259qvimd\u0259ki r\u0259q\u0259ml\u0259ri d\u0259yi\u015fm\u0259kl\u0259 \u00f6z axar\u0131yla davam edir. D\u0259yi\u015f\u0259n insanlar\u0131n d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259l\u0259ridir. \u00a0\u201c\u015e\u0259xsi fikrimdir\u201d, \u2013deyib, h\u0259r\u0259 \u00f6z c\u0131l\u0131z d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259sini c\u0259miyy\u0259t\u0259 soxu\u015fduraraq, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc d\u0259, c\u0259miyy\u0259ti d\u0259 iyr\u0259ncl\u0259\u015fdirir. Kim\u0259 bax\u0131rsan ham\u0131 n\u0259yis\u0259 d\u0259yi\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 can at\u0131r. Kimisi hakimiyy\u0259ti, kimisi c\u0259miyy\u0259ti, kimisi sevdiyi insan\u0131 v\u0259 sair\u0259. Amma he\u00e7 kim \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc d\u0259yi\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 can atm\u0131r. N\u0259 vaxtsa d\u00fcz\u0259l\u0259c\u0259k dey\u0259 \u00fcmid ediriks\u0259, s\u0259hv edirik. \u00c7\u00fcnki \u00a0he\u00e7 n\u0259 d\u00fcz\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k, \u0259ksin\u0259 h\u0259r \u015fey iyr\u0259ncliy\u0259 do\u011fru ged\u0259r\u0259k daha da pisl\u0259\u015f\u0259c\u0259k.<\/p>\n

Qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndak\u0131 bo\u015f st\u0259kan\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 uzadaraq:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Qalx o \u00e7ay\u0131ndan birini d\u0259 ver, z\u0259hm\u0259t olmasa. Bo\u011faz\u0131m qurudu, \u2013dedi.<\/p>\n

M\u0259n \u00e7ay s\u00fcz\u0259n\u0259 kimi o, cibind\u0259n siqaret \u00e7\u0131xar\u0131b, titr\u0259y\u0259n barmaqlar\u0131n\u0131n aras\u0131nda doda\u011f\u0131na qoyub, kibritl\u0259 al\u0131\u015fd\u0131rd\u0131. Bir ne\u00e7\u0259 qullab vurub, \u00f6sk\u00fcrd\u00fc v\u0259 siqareti k\u00fclqab\u0131ya basaraq s\u00f6nd\u00fcrd\u00fc. S\u00fczd\u00fcy\u00fcm \u00e7aydan bir qurtum i\u00e7ib, n\u0259f\u0259sini d\u0259r\u0259r\u0259k, s\u00f6z\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 H\u0259, onu deyirdim ax\u0131. G\u0259lib h\u0259min k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131m. \u00dcnvanlara baxd\u0131m ki, h\u0259r iki ev \u00fczb\u0259\u00fczd\u00fcr v\u0259 aralar\u0131nda bir ne\u00e7\u0259 metr m\u0259saf\u0259 var. \u0130lk sa\u011f t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259ki qap\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6yd\u00fcm. \u00d6rp\u0259yinin alt\u0131ndan a\u011f bir\u00e7\u0259kl\u0259ri g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u0259n ya\u015fl\u0131 bir qad\u0131n a\u00e7d\u0131 qap\u0131n\u0131. Z\u0259if g\u00f6r\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015f kimi g\u00f6zl\u0259rini q\u0131yaraq, \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 xeyli baxandan sonra:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Tan\u0131mad\u0131m ax\u0131, ay o\u011ful. Kims\u0259n? \u2013 dedi.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Po\u00e7talyonam, ay ana, m\u0259ktub g\u0259tirmi\u015f\u0259m.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Kimd\u0259ndir?<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u018fsg\u0259r m\u0259ktubudur, ay ana.<\/p>\n

Arvad\u0131n g\u00f6zl\u0259rin\u0259 sanki i\u015f\u0131q g\u0259ldi. H\u0259r iki \u0259liyl\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fc ovuclar\u0131na al\u0131b:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 G\u0259l\u0259n ayaqlar\u0131na qurban olum, ay bala. G\u0259l bir \u00f6p\u00fcm s\u0259ni, \u2013 deyib aln\u0131mdan \u00f6pd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

M\u0259ktubu al\u0131b, \u00f6p\u00fcb \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 s\u00fcrt\u0259r\u0259k, qoynuna qoydu. \u00dczb\u0259\u00fcz evi g\u00f6st\u0259rib soru\u015fdum:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ay ana, bu evd\u0259 kim ya\u015fay\u0131r?<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Telli arvad\u0131n evidir. Onadam\u0131 m\u0259ktub var? \u2013 t\u0259\u0259cc\u00fcbl\u0259 soru\u015fdu.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 H\u0259, ay ana, m\u0259ktub var ona da.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Kimd\u0259n olar, g\u00f6r\u0259s\u0259n. Yaz\u0131\u011f\u0131n iki o\u011flu var idi, el\u0259 m\u00fcharib\u0259nin ilk g\u00fcnl\u0259rind\u0259 h\u0259r ikisind\u0259n qara m\u0259ktub g\u0259ldi. Bir q\u0131z\u0131yla qal\u0131b t\u0259k dam\u0131n alt\u0131nda. Yaz\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u0259rini d\u0259 37-d\u0259 g\u00fcll\u0259l\u0259dil\u0259r.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Y\u0259qin qohumlar\u0131ndand\u0131r, \u2013 deyib, sa\u011folla\u015fd\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Telli arvad\u0131n qap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6yd\u00fcm. Qara qa\u015f, qara g\u00f6z, g\u00f6zl\u0259ri r\u0259ngd\u0259 \u00e7iynind\u0259n azca a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 sa\u00e7lar\u0131 olan, \u00fcz g\u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n \u015f\u0131ltaql\u0131q ya\u011fan bir q\u0131z a\u00e7d\u0131 qap\u0131n\u0131. M\u0259ni g\u00f6rc\u0259k \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc itirdi. Qorxaq v\u0259 titr\u0259k s\u0259sl\u0259:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Buyurun, \u2013 dedi.<\/p>\n

Hiss etdim ki, g\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259 bir k\u0259d\u0259r yarand\u0131 v\u0259 \u0259lb\u0259tt\u0259 ki, m\u0259n bu k\u0259d\u0259rin s\u0259b\u0259bini bilirdim.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Siz\u0259 \u0259sg\u0259r m\u0259ktubu var,\u2013 deyib \u00e7antam\u0131 e\u015f\u0259l\u0259y\u0259r\u0259k m\u0259ktubu tap\u0131b ona uzatd\u0131m.<\/p>\n

M\u0259ktubu a\u00e7\u0131b baxanda \u00a0g\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259ki k\u0259d\u0259r yoxa \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131. H\u0259min k\u0259d\u0259ri d\u0259c\u0259llik simas\u0131 \u0259v\u0259zl\u0259di.<\/p>\n

-Ay q\u0131z, kimdir, o? \u2013 \u0130\u00e7\u0259rid\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259n bu s\u0259s q\u0131z\u0131 h\u00fcrk\u00fctd\u00fc. M\u0259ktubu t\u0259l\u0259sik k\u00f6yn\u0259yinin qoluna d\u00fcrt\u0259r\u0259k:<\/p>\n

– He\u00e7, ay ana, qon\u015fudur, \u2013 deyib m\u0259n\u0259 bax\u0131b g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcnd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

Sonra m\u0259nd\u0259n xahi\u015f etdi ki, bir d\u0259 m\u0259ktub g\u0259tir\u0259nd\u0259 anas\u0131 a\u00e7arsa qap\u0131n\u0131 ona verm\u0259yim. Bir yolunu tap\u0131m q\u0131z\u0131n \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 verim.<\/p>\n

Sonralar o q\u0131zla dostla\u015fd\u0131q. Ad\u0131 T\u0259hmin\u0259 idi. M\u0259ktubu yazan o\u011flan onun h\u0259m \u00fczb\u0259\u00fcz qon\u015fusu, h\u0259m d\u0259 sevgilisiymi\u015f. Eyni anda bir m\u0259ktub anas\u0131na, birini d\u0259 T\u0259hmin\u0259y\u0259 yaz\u0131rd\u0131 h\u0259r zaman. Amma bir g\u00fcn h\u0259min \u0259sg\u0259rd\u0259n sad\u0259c\u0259 bir m\u0259ktub g\u0259ldi-\u201cQara m\u0259ktub\u201d. \u00c7ox \u00e7\u0131x\u0131lmaz bir v\u0259ziyy\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcm. M\u0259ktubu \u0259sg\u0259rin anas\u0131nam\u0131, ya T\u0259hmin\u0259y\u0259mi verim bilmirdim. \u00c7ox d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fckd\u0259n sonra q\u0259rara ald\u0131m ki, anaya verim.<\/p>\n

T\u0259r\u0259dd\u00fcd \u00a0i\u00e7ind\u0259 qap\u0131ya yax\u0131nla\u015faraq, \u0259ll\u0259rim \u0259s\u0259-\u0259s\u0259 d\u00f6yd\u00fcm. Qad\u0131n qap\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b m\u0259ni g\u00f6r\u00fcnc\u0259 sevindi.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Xo\u015f g\u0259ldin, ay o\u011ful,\u2013 deyib d\u0259rhal da \u0259lim\u0259 baxd\u0131.<\/p>\n

Titr\u0259y\u0259n \u0259liml\u0259 m\u0259ktubu ona uzatd\u0131m. H\u0259r zamank\u0131 kimi m\u0259ktubu alan kimi qoxulad\u0131, sonra \u00f6pd\u00fc. El\u0259 qap\u0131n\u0131n a\u011fz\u0131ndaca m\u0259ktubu a\u00e7ma\u011fa ba\u015flayanda tez oradan uzaqla\u015fma\u011f\u0131 q\u0259rara ald\u0131m v\u0259 sa\u011folla\u015fmadan \u00a0iti add\u0131mlarla arxam\u0131 d\u00f6n\u00fcb getm\u0259k ist\u0259yirdim ki, tapp\u0131lt\u0131 s\u0259sin\u0259 geri \u00e7evrildim. Qad\u0131n m\u0259ktub \u0259lind\u0259 qap\u0131n\u0131n astanas\u0131nda y\u0131x\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. C\u0259ld ona t\u0259r\u0259f\u00a0 y\u00fcy\u00fcr\u00fcb, dizl\u0259rimi yer\u0259 ataraq onu silk\u0259l\u0259dims\u0259 d\u0259, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259di. Q\u0131\u015fq\u0131r\u0131b qon\u015fular\u0131 k\u00f6m\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131m. Be\u015f-alt\u0131 arvad t\u00f6k\u00fcl\u00fcb g\u0259ldil\u0259r. Kimisi yayl\u0131qla yell\u0259yir, kimisi \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 su \u00e7il\u0259m\u0259kl\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful idi. \u00dczb\u0259\u00fcz qap\u0131n\u0131n c\u0131r\u0131lt\u0131s\u0131na qanr\u0131ld\u0131m. Telli arvad \u015fal\u0131n\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131na \u00f6rt\u0259-\u00f6rt\u0259 qon\u015fusunun k\u00f6m\u0259yin\u0259 qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131. Onun dal\u0131nca da T\u0259hmin\u0259. O, \u0259vv\u0259lc\u0259 n\u0259 ba\u015f verdiyini anlamad\u0131. Amma qad\u0131n\u0131n \u0259lind\u0259ki m\u0259ktubu g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 \u00e7evrilib d\u00fcz g\u00f6zl\u0259rimin i\u00e7in\u0259 baxd\u0131 v\u0259 \u0259yilib m\u0259ktubu g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u0259r\u0259k evl\u0259rin\u0259 t\u0259r\u0259f getdi. Qap\u0131ya \u00e7at\u0131b oturdu. Bir d\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 qald\u0131r\u0131b \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 baxd\u0131. Bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131ndan anlad\u0131m ki, bu q\u0131z\u0131n g\u00f6zl\u0259rind\u0259ki k\u0259d\u0259ri bir daha he\u00e7 vaxt d\u0259c\u0259llik simas\u0131 \u0259v\u0259zl\u0259m\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k. O g\u00fcnd\u0259n bir daha o m\u0259h\u0259ll\u0259y\u0259 ayaq basmad\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Ki\u015fi n\u0259mli g\u00f6zl\u0259rini ba\u015f barma\u011f\u0131n\u0131n ucuyla silib, bir siqaret yand\u0131rd\u0131. Yen\u0259 bir ne\u00e7\u0259 qullab vurub, \u00f6sk\u00fcrd\u00fc v\u0259 siqareti k\u00fclqab\u0131ya basaraq s\u00f6nd\u00fcrd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 O q\u0259bir T\u0259hmin\u0259nindir? \u2013 maraqla soru\u015fdum.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yox. O g\u00fcnd\u0259n bir il ke\u00e7mi\u015fdi. Bir il \u0259rzind\u0259 o q\u0259d\u0259r el\u0259 t\u0259hmin\u0259l\u0259r g\u00f6rd\u00fcm ki, art\u0131q \u201cqara m\u0259ktub\u201dlar m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn adil\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdi. Ta ki, bir \u201cqara m\u0259ktub\u201d h\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131 d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r.<\/p>\n

1943-c\u00fc ilin yaz\u0131 idi. \u00c7antam\u0131 \u00e7iynim\u0259 sal\u0131b, m\u0259ktublar\u0131m\u0131 paylamaqla m\u0259\u015f\u011ful idim. N\u00f6vb\u0259ti qap\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6yd\u00fcm. Sar\u0131 sa\u00e7lar\u0131, ya\u015f\u0131la \u00e7alan g\u00f6zl\u0259ri olan g\u0259nc bir qad\u0131n a\u00e7d\u0131. G\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcn\u0259r\u0259k:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Buyurun, \u2013 dedi.<\/p>\n

G\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259y\u0259rk\u0259n batan yana\u011f\u0131 onu daha da g\u00f6z\u0259l g\u00f6st\u0259rirdi. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc nec\u0259 itirmi\u015fdims\u0259, qap\u0131n\u0131 niy\u0259 d\u00f6yd\u00fcy\u00fcm\u00fc d\u0259 unutmu\u015fdum. Key kimi g\u00f6zl\u0259rimi d\u00f6y\u0259r\u0259k, madd\u0131m-madd\u0131m bax\u0131rd\u0131m. Qad\u0131n bu d\u0259f\u0259 daha i\u00e7d\u0259n g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcn\u0259r\u0259k:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Buyurun, siz\u0259 n\u0259 laz\u0131md\u0131r? \u2013dedi.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 M\u0259n\u0259? H\u0259, siz\u0259 m\u0259ktub var, \u2013 deyib m\u0259ktubu \u00e7antamdan \u00e7\u0131xard\u0131m.<\/p>\n

\u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc itirdiyimd\u0259n v\u0259 \u0259ll\u0259rim \u0259sdiyind\u0259n m\u0259ktub \u0259limd\u0259n d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc yer\u0259. H\u0259r ikimiz eyni anda \u0259yilib m\u0259ktubu g\u00f6t\u00fcrm\u0259k ist\u0259y\u0259rk\u0259n, ba\u015flar\u0131m\u0131z bir-birin\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259r\u0259k toqqu\u015fdu. \u018fliyl\u0259 aln\u0131n\u0131 ovu\u015fdurub, ufuldad\u0131, sonra g\u00fcld\u00fc. M\u0259n d\u0259 ona qo\u015fulub g\u00fcld\u00fcm.<\/p>\n

H\u0259min g\u00fcn o q\u0131z\u0131n ya\u015f\u0131la \u00e7alan g\u00f6zl\u0259ri, batan yana\u011f\u0131, g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u00fc he\u00e7 yad\u0131mdan \u00e7\u0131xmad\u0131. B\u00fct\u00fcn g\u00fcn\u00fc ancaq key kimi dola\u015fd\u0131m. \u0130lk d\u0259f\u0259 idi m\u0259nd\u0259 bel\u0259 bir hal ba\u015f verirdi. Q\u0259rib\u0259 bir hiss yaranm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 i\u00e7imd\u0259. Gec\u0259ni d\u0259 s\u0259h\u0259r\u0259 kimi yata bilm\u0259dim. O g\u00fcnd\u0259n h\u0259r g\u00fcn onlar\u0131n m\u0259h\u0259ll\u0259sin\u0259 gedir, p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259 boylan\u0131rd\u0131msa da, onu g\u00f6r\u0259 bilmirdim. \u00d6z\u00fcm d\u0259 bilmirdim niy\u0259 bel\u0259 edirdim. Bir g\u00fcn yen\u0259 m\u0259h\u0259ll\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259n ke\u00e7\u0259nd\u0259 hardansa g\u0259ldiyini g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. M\u0259ni g\u00f6r\u00fcb g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcnd\u00fc. Salamla\u015f\u0131b:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 N\u0259 yax\u015f\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm sizi. C\u0259bh\u0259y\u0259 m\u0259ktub yollayacaqd\u0131m, vers\u0259m, siz po\u00e7tdan g\u00f6nd\u0259r\u0259rsiniz? \u2013 dedi.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 H\u0259, \u0259lb\u0259tt\u0259.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Amma m\u0259n m\u0259ktubu h\u0259l\u0259 yazmam\u0131\u015fam ax\u0131,\u2013 deyib sonra n\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcs\u0259, vaxt\u0131n\u0131z varsa g\u0259lin i\u00e7\u0259ri, m\u0259ktubu yaz\u0131b verim,\u2013 dey\u0259r\u0259k qap\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b m\u0259ni i\u00e7\u0259ri d\u0259v\u0259t etdi.<\/p>\n

Q\u0259fil t\u0259klif kar\u0131xd\u0131rm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 m\u0259ni. S\u0131x\u0131la-s\u0131x\u0131la ayaqqab\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xar\u0131b, divarlar\u0131n\u0131n suva\u011f\u0131 t\u00f6k\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f, k\u00f6hn\u0259 mebell\u0259rl\u0259 \u00e7ox s\u0259liq\u0259li b\u0259z\u0259nmi\u015f bir ota\u011fa ke\u00e7dim.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Siz \u0259yl\u0259\u015fin m\u0259n siz\u0259 bir \u00e7ay g\u0259tirim. Siz \u00e7ay\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 i\u00e7\u0259n\u0259 kimi m\u0259n d\u0259 m\u0259ktubu yaz\u0131m, \u2013 deyib m\u0259tb\u0259x\u0259 ke\u00e7di.<\/p>\n

O g\u00fcnd\u0259n onunla tez-tez g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr, m\u0259ktub g\u0259tirir v\u0259 oturub onun m\u0259ktub yazmas\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdim. Ad\u0131 M\u00fcjqan idi. C\u0259bh\u0259d\u0259ki d\u0259 \u0259riydi. T\u0259z\u0259 evl\u0259nibl\u0259rmi\u015f, toylar\u0131ndan sonra \u0259rini c\u0259bh\u0259y\u0259 apar\u0131blar. \u018frd\u0259 oldu\u011funu bil\u0259nd\u0259n sonra, ondan uzaqla\u015fma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fsam da, bacarmad\u0131m. \u00dcr\u0259y\u0259 h\u00f6km etm\u0259k olmur. \u0130ndiki vaxta baxma, o vaxt\u0131 \u0259sg\u0259r ail\u0259sin\u0259 g\u00f6z dik\u0259ni g\u00fcll\u0259l\u0259yirdil\u0259r.<\/p>\n

Bir g\u00fcn i\u015fim\u0259 d\u0259, \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 d\u0259, ona da x\u0259yan\u0259t etdim. Onlar\u0131n m\u0259ktublar\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b oxuma\u011fa davam etdim. Bu m\u0259nd\u0259 art\u0131q v\u0259rdi\u015f hal\u0131 alm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Bir m\u0259ktublar\u0131n\u0131 bel\u0259 buraxm\u0131r, ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 bir-bir oxuyurdum. Zaman ke\u00e7dikc\u0259 d\u0259 ona daha \u00e7ox ba\u011flan\u0131r, ba\u011fland\u0131qca da onu \u0259rin\u0259 q\u0131sqan\u0131rd\u0131m.<\/p>\n

1944-c\u00fc ilin yanvar\u0131nda, soyuq, \u015faxtal\u0131 bir q\u0131\u015f g\u00fcn\u00fcnd\u0259 ona da \u201cqara m\u0259ktub\u201d g\u0259ldi. Gec\u0259ni yatmay\u0131b, s\u0259h\u0259r\u0259 kimi d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcm v\u0259 q\u0259rara ald\u0131m ki, m\u0259ktubu ona verm\u0259yim. S\u0259h\u0259ri durub getdim onlara. \u201cHava soyuqdur, donmu\u015fam. Burdan ke\u00e7irdim, dedim bir \u00e7ay ver\u0259s\u0259n q\u0131z\u0131\u015fam\u201d b\u0259han\u0259siyl\u0259 ev\u0259 ke\u00e7ib oturdum. \u018frind\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259n m\u0259ktublar\u0131 k\u00f6hn\u0259 dolab\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259ki q\u0259hv\u0259yi r\u0259ngli m\u00fccr\u00fcd\u0259 saxlad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bilirdim. O, m\u0259tb\u0259x\u0259 \u00e7ay g\u0259tirm\u0259y\u0259 ged\u0259nd\u0259 m\u00fccr\u00fcd\u0259ki m\u0259ktublar\u0131n birini o\u011furlayaraq, \u00e7antama qoydum. \u00c7ay\u0131m\u0131 i\u00e7ib, sa\u011folla\u015f\u0131b \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131m. Bir h\u0259ft\u0259 gec\u0259l\u0259ri yatmay\u0131b, o\u011furlad\u0131\u011f\u0131m m\u0259ktubu qar\u015f\u0131ma qoyaraq, onun \u0259rinin x\u0259ttind\u0259 yazma\u011f\u0131 \u00f6yr\u0259nm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fd\u0131m v\u0259 n\u0259hay\u0259t ki, ist\u0259diyimi \u0259ld\u0259 etdim. Ondan sonra ayda bir d\u0259f\u0259 \u0259rinin ad\u0131ndan ona m\u0259ktublar yaz\u0131b apar\u0131r, onun yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131 m\u0259ktublar\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcm oxuyub, y\u0131\u011f\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131m ev\u0259. Zamanla aram\u0131zda o q\u0259d\u0259r yax\u0131nl\u0131q, s\u0259mimiyy\u0259t yaranm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ki, bir problemi olanda m\u0259n\u0259 deyir, sirl\u0259rini m\u0259niml\u0259 b\u00f6l\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb, m\u0259sl\u0259h\u0259tl\u0259\u015firdi.<\/p>\n

Bu hal 45-ci ilin may\u0131na kimi davam etdi. Sovetl\u0259r Almaniya \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 q\u0259l\u0259b\u0259 \u00e7alandan sonra, c\u0259bh\u0259d\u0259kil\u0259r qay\u0131tma\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131lar. Art\u0131q \u0259rinin \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn\u00fc, m\u0259ktublar\u0131n m\u0259nim yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 gizl\u0259d\u0259 bilm\u0259zdim. Bir yolun tap\u0131b, h\u0259qiq\u0259ti ona dem\u0259li idim. Gec\u0259ni oturub, ona ilk d\u0259f\u0259 \u00f6z ad\u0131mdan m\u0259ktub yazd\u0131m. H\u0259r \u015feyi oldu\u011fu kimi, m\u0259ktublar\u0131 hans\u0131 vaxtdan m\u0259n yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131, onu g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcm g\u00fcnd\u0259n sevdiyimi, ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 birc\u0259-birc\u0259 etiraf etdim. Sabah\u0131s\u0131 g\u00fcn m\u0259ktubu apar\u0131b ona verib, tez d\u0259 ordan uzaqla\u015fd\u0131m. Po\u00e7t m\u00fcdirind\u0259n xahi\u015f edib, ba\u015fqa bir m\u0259h\u0259ll\u0259y\u0259 ke\u00e7dim. Bir g\u00fcn s\u0259h\u0259r idar\u0259d\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xanda qap\u0131da onunla qar\u015f\u0131la\u015fd\u0131m. \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc itirdim, n\u0259 dey\u0259c\u0259yimi, n\u0259 ed\u0259c\u0259yimi bilm\u0259dim. H\u0259tta qa\u00e7maq da ke\u00e7di fikrimd\u0259n.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Dan\u0131\u015fmal\u0131y\u0131q,\u2013 sakit s\u0259sl\u0259 dedi.<\/p>\n

Ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 sal\u0131b, he\u00e7 n\u0259 dem\u0259dim.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u0130\u015fl\u0259rini bitir, g\u0259l biz\u0259, \u2013 deyib arxas\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7evirib getdi.<\/p>\n

G\u00fcnorta \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc onun qap\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6y\u0259n g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Bura nec\u0259 g\u0259lib \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m, n\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcb g\u0259lmi\u015fdim bilm\u0259dim. Qap\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b m\u0259ni i\u00e7\u0259ri d\u0259v\u0259t etdi.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Mix\u0259kli \u00e7ay\u0131m var, i\u00e7irs\u0259n? \u2013 dey\u0259 soru\u015fdu.<\/p>\n

Ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 bulad\u0131m.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00d6z\u00fcn bil\u0259rs\u0259n, \u2013 deyib stul \u00e7\u0259k\u0259r\u0259k, qar\u015f\u0131mda oturdu. Bir m\u00fcdd\u0259t m\u0259ni s\u00fcz\u0259nd\u0259n sonra s\u00f6z\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 S\u0259ni anlay\u0131ram, sevirs\u0259n. Sevginin n\u0259 oldu\u011funu, nec\u0259 bir hiss oldu\u011funu m\u0259n yax\u015f\u0131 bilir\u0259m. Amma bel\u0259 etm\u0259m\u0259li idin. Onun \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn\u00fc vaxt\u0131nda dem\u0259li idin m\u0259n\u0259. S\u0259n m\u0259n\u0259 yalan dan\u0131\u015fd\u0131n. O bir g\u00fcn qay\u0131dacaq dey\u0259, bo\u015f \u00fcmidl\u0259 ya\u015fama\u011fa m\u0259cbur etdin. Bilir\u0259m, bunu m\u0259n \u00fcz\u00fclm\u0259yim dey\u0259 etdin, amma yen\u0259 d\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fck bir s\u0259hv etdin. M\u0259n s\u0259ni sev\u0259 bilm\u0259r\u0259m. \u00c7\u00fcnki onun yoxlu\u011funa bel\u0259 x\u0259yan\u0259t ed\u0259 bilm\u0259r\u0259m. Cismi yoxdursa da, bir \u00f6m\u00fcr onun ruhunu sev\u0259c\u0259m. S\u0259ni is\u0259 sevgin\u0259 ba\u011f\u0131\u015flay\u0131ram. \u0130ndi is\u0259 dur get v\u0259 bir daha qar\u015f\u0131ma \u00e7\u0131xma.<\/p>\n

S\u00f6z tap\u0131b cavab ver\u0259 bilm\u0259dim. Odur ki, sakitc\u0259 \u00e7antam\u0131 da g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb, sa\u011folla\u015fmadan \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131m. N\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00fcc g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fsam da, onu unuda bilmirdim. N\u0259 yeyib i\u00e7diyimi bilir, n\u0259 normal yuxu yata bilirdim. Bir gec\u0259 onu yuxuda g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. \u018flind\u0259 silah m\u0259n\u0259 tu\u015flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u201cS\u0259n m\u0259ni aldatd\u0131n, s\u0259n m\u0259n\u0259 yalan dan\u0131\u015fd\u0131n\u201d, \u2013 deyib at\u0259\u015f a\u00e7d\u0131. T\u0259r-su i\u00e7ind\u0259 yuxudan dik at\u0131ld\u0131m. S\u0259h\u0259ri diri g\u00f6zl\u0259 a\u00e7\u0131b, g\u00fcn \u00e7\u0131xar-\u00e7\u0131xmaz getdim m\u0259h\u0259ll\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259. El\u0259 tini t\u0259z\u0259 d\u00f6nm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcm ki, qap\u0131n\u0131n a\u011fz\u0131na qon\u015fular\u0131n topla\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. Ham\u0131s\u0131na c\u0259bh\u0259d\u0259n m\u0259ktublar g\u0259tirmi\u015f\u0259m dey\u0259, dem\u0259k olar ki, ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 tan\u0131y\u0131rd\u0131m. Ayaqlar\u0131m titr\u0259y\u0259-titr\u0259y\u0259 qon\u015fulardan birin\u0259 yax\u0131nla\u015f\u0131b, n\u0259 ba\u015f verdiyini soru\u015fdum. \u201cM\u00fcjgan gec\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcb\u201d s\u00f6zl\u0259rini e\u015fid\u0259nd\u0259 g\u00f6z\u00fcm qarald\u0131, d\u00fcnya ba\u015f\u0131ma f\u0131rland\u0131. G\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc a\u00e7anda x\u0259st\u0259xanadayd\u0131m. Y\u0131x\u0131lark\u0259n ba\u015f\u0131m yer\u0259 d\u0259yibmi\u015f. Ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 dayanm\u0131\u015f tibb bac\u0131s\u0131 n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r m\u0259ni saxlama\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fsa da, inad edib, ordan \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131m. X\u0259st\u0259xanadan \u00e7\u0131xanda g\u00fcn\u0259\u015f \u00fcz\u00fc q\u00fcruba t\u0259r\u0259f \u0259yildiyini g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259 anlad\u0131m ki, s\u0259h\u0259r tezd\u0259nd\u0259n ax\u015fama kimi burda hu\u015fsuz v\u0259ziyy\u0259td\u0259 olmu\u015fam. Qa\u00e7araq, t\u0259ngin\u0259f\u0259s \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc onlar\u0131n m\u0259h\u0259ll\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131rd\u0131m. M\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259n\u0259 kimi onu art\u0131q d\u0259fn etmi\u015fdil\u0259r. Qon\u015fulardan q\u0259brin yerini soru\u015fdum. O g\u00fcnd\u0259n h\u0259r h\u0259ft\u0259 bura g\u0259lir, onunla s\u00f6hb\u0259tl\u0259\u015fir, d\u0259rdl\u0259\u015fib, durub gedir\u0259m.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 B\u0259s he\u00e7 evl\u0259nm\u0259din? \u2013 dey\u0259 soru\u015fdum.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yox. M\u0259n d\u0259 onun yoxlu\u011funa x\u0259yan\u0259t etm\u0259dim. Cismi m\u0259ni t\u0259rk edib getdis\u0259 d\u0259, ruhunu sev\u0259r\u0259k ya\u015fad\u0131m. Bunu indiy\u0259d\u0259k kims\u0259y\u0259 dan\u0131\u015fmam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Hiss edir\u0259m ki, \u00f6mr\u00fcm\u00fcn sonuna \u00e7ox qalmay\u0131b, ona g\u00f6r\u0259 s\u0259n\u0259 dan\u0131\u015fd\u0131m ki, \u00f6z\u00fcml\u0259 q\u0259bir\u0259 aparmay\u0131m.<\/p>\n

S\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc bitirib, yen\u0259 bir siqaret yand\u0131rd\u0131. Yen\u0259 iki-\u00fc\u00e7 qullab, yen\u0259 \u00f6sk\u00fcr\u0259k v\u0259 yen\u0259 d\u0259 yar\u0131m\u00e7\u0131q siqareti k\u00fclqab\u0131ya bas\u0131b s\u00f6nd\u00fcr\u0259r\u0259k aya\u011fa qalxd\u0131.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Gedim daha m\u0259n, gecdir, \u2013 deyib titr\u0259y\u0259n \u0259lini m\u0259n\u0259 uzatd\u0131.<\/p>\n

\u018flini s\u0131x\u0131b, ad\u0131n\u0131 soru\u015fdum.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Telman, \u2013 deyib g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcnd\u00fc v\u0259 sa\u011folla\u015faraq getdi.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Onun gedi\u015find\u0259n bir h\u0259ft\u0259 ke\u00e7m\u0259sin\u0259 baxmayaraq, q\u0259birstanl\u0131\u011fa g\u0259lm\u0259mi\u015fdi. B\u00fct\u00fcn g\u00fcn\u00fc hey onu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr, \u00fcnvan\u0131n\u0131 almad\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc danlay\u0131rd\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Q\u0131\u015f gir\u0259nd\u0259n bu g\u00fcn ilk d\u0259f\u0259 idi ki, ya\u011f\u0131\u015f ya\u011fma\u011fa ba\u015flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Gec\u0259d\u0259n ba\u015flayan leysan yava\u015f-yava\u015f s\u0259ngimi\u015f, indi is\u0259 x\u0131rda-x\u0131rda \u00e7is\u0259l\u0259yirdi. P\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259nin \u00f6n\u00fcnd\u0259 oturub ya\u011f\u0131\u015fa tama\u015fa edirdim ki, iki n\u0259f\u0259rin ma\u015f\u0131ndan d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb, g\u00f6z\u0259t\u00e7i m\u0259nt\u0259q\u0259sin\u0259 t\u0259r\u0259f qa\u00e7d\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm. \u201cBu ya\u011f\u0131\u015fda kims\u0259 q\u0259bir ziyar\u0259tin\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259z, y\u0259qin ki, r\u0259hm\u0259t\u0259 ged\u0259nl\u0259ri var\u201d dey\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u0259r\u0259k, qap\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b, onlar\u0131 i\u00e7\u0259ri d\u0259v\u0259t etdim. G\u0259l\u0259nl\u0259rd\u0259n biri salam verdikd\u0259n sonra:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Telman ki\u015fini tan\u0131y\u0131rd\u0131z? \u2013 dey\u0259 soru\u015fdu.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Po\u00e7talyon?<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yox, n\u0259 po\u00e7talyon. Qoca ki\u015fidir, qon\u015fumuzdur. Bu g\u00fcn s\u0259h\u0259r evind\u0259 \u00f6lm\u00fc\u015f tapd\u0131q. \u018flind\u0259 bu m\u0259ktub vard\u0131, \u2013 deyib islanm\u0131\u015f penc\u0259yinin cibl\u0259rini axtaraq, \u00fc\u00e7bucaq \u015f\u0259klind\u0259 bir ka\u011f\u0131z par\u00e7as\u0131 tap\u0131b, m\u0259n\u0259 uzatd\u0131.<\/p>\n

M\u0259ktubun \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 q\u0259birstanl\u0131\u011f\u0131n \u00fcnvan\u0131 v\u0259 m\u0259ktubun q\u0259birstanl\u0131q ke\u015fik\u00e7isin\u0259 \u00e7ataca\u011f\u0131 yaz\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u018fll\u0259rim \u0259s\u0259-\u0259s\u0259 t\u0259l\u0259sik m\u0259ktubu a\u00e7\u0131b oxuma\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131m: \u201cM\u0259ni onun yan\u0131nda d\u0259fn ed\u0259rs\u0259n\u201d yaz\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Ani olaraq g\u00f6z ya\u015flar\u0131m\u0131 saxlaya bilm\u0259dim.<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 M\u0259ktubu oxumu\u015fuq, amma \u201co\u201d kimdir, q\u0259bri hardad\u0131r bilmirik. Siz yeri g\u00f6st\u0259rin, biz q\u0259bri qazma\u011fa ba\u015flayaq, \u2013 g\u0259l\u0259nl\u0259rd\u0259n biri dedi.<\/p>\n

Penc\u0259yimin qoluyla g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc silib:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Siz gedin meyidi g\u0259tirin. Q\u0259bri m\u0259n \u00f6z\u00fcm qazacam,\u2013 dedim v\u0259 divara s\u00f6yk\u0259nmi\u015f bel v\u0259 k\u00fcl\u00fcng\u00fc g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u0259r\u0259k, \u201co\u201dnun q\u0259brin\u0259 t\u0259r\u0259f add\u0131mlad\u0131m.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131ya 1089 d\u0259f\u0259 bax\u0131l\u0131b<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00c7\u00f6ld\u0259n ayaq s\u0259sl\u0259ri e\u015fidib, \u0259limd\u0259ki t\u0259z\u0259 s\u00fczd\u00fcy\u00fcm \u00e7ay\u0131 taxtadan d\u00fcz\u0259lib, r\u0259ngl\u0259nm\u0259mi\u015f stolun \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 qoyub, p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259nin \u00e7irkli \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259sind\u0259n boyland\u0131msa da, he\u00e7 kimi g\u00f6r\u0259 bilm\u0259dim. Oturub \u00e7ay\u0131m\u0131 \u00fcf\u00fcr\u0259-\u00fcf\u00fcr\u0259 qurtumlama\u011fa ba\u015flad\u0131m. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 k\u00fcl\u0259k n\u0259yis\u0259 tapp\u0131ldatm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. \u0130nanm\u0131ram ki, bu havada kims\u0259 q\u0259br ziyar\u0259tin\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259. Bu q\u0131\u015f dem\u0259k olar ki, he\u00e7 ya\u011f\u0131nt\u0131 olmam\u0131\u015f, quru, \u015faxtal\u0131 v\u0259 k\u00fcl\u0259kli bir hava […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":12784,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[16,3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12783"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=12783"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12783\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":12785,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12783\/revisions\/12785"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/12784"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=12783"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=12783"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=12783"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}