{"id":14124,"date":"2020-06-27T13:19:13","date_gmt":"2020-06-27T08:19:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=14124"},"modified":"2020-06-27T13:19:13","modified_gmt":"2020-06-27T08:19:13","slug":"xaliq-r%c9%99himli-s%c9%99h%c9%99rd%c9%99n-g%c9%99l%c9%99n-usaq-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=14124","title":{"rendered":"Xaliq R\u0259himli – “\u015e\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259n u\u015faq”"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"1800173_286998971495691_171391277621403070_o\"<\/a>( xatir\u0259 – povest)
\ndavam\u0131…
\nAz bir zamanda n\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259n\u0259 yem\u0259li bitkil\u0259ri ,otlar\u0131 tan\u0131td\u0131.Quzuqula\u011f\u0131 pi\u015fikcayna\u011f\u0131 ,qoyunqula\u011f\u0131 ,cincilim,lilpar ,q\u0131j\u0131- q\u0131j\u0131,yemlikotu ,bald\u0131r\u011fan \u0259m\u0259nk\u00f6m\u0259nci,\u0259v\u0259lik,yolotu v\u0259 ba\u015fqa bitkil\u0259rin hans\u0131 \u015f\u0259raitd\u0259 bitdiyini ,nec\u0259 y\u0131\u011f\u0131l\u0131b yeyildiyini bir- bir ba\u015fa sald\u0131.\u018flimi dalad\u0131\u011f\u0131 ilk g\u00fcnn\u0259n gicitkandan z\u0259hl\u0259m getdi.Baxmayaraq ki, yel x\u0259st\u0259liyinin d\u0259rman\u0131yd\u0131. N\u0259n\u0259m \u00e7ox i\u015fl\u0259dirdi.\u018fm\u0259nk\u00f6m\u0259ncini, yolotunu xo\u015flayard\u0131m.Yaz vaxt\u0131 \u0259lim\u0259 b\u0131\u00e7aq vedr\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrdim h\u0259y\u0259tin can\u0131na. N\u0259n\u0259m h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 y\u0131\u011fd\u0131\u011f\u0131m penc\u0259ri t\u0259mizl\u0259y\u0259r ,yuyar ,do\u011frayar so\u011fan\u00e7an\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 t\u00f6k\u0259rdi. Sonra qaynanm\u0131\u015f d\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fc bi\u015f\u0259n\u0259 yax\u0131n x\u00f6r\u0259y\u0259 \u0259lav\u0259 ed\u0259rdi.Bu x\u00f6r\u0259yin \u0259trind\u0259n, dad\u0131ndan doymaq olmazd\u0131 .Haz\u0131r penc\u0259r\u0259 sar\u0131msaql\u0131 qat\u0131q da \u0259lav\u0259 edib nu\u015fcanl\u0131qla yey\u0259rdik .N\u0259n\u0259m oldu\u011funa g\u00f6r\u0259 demir\u0259m – \u0259ll\u0259ri qizil idi.H\u0259min anlarda d\u00fcnyan\u0131n yek a\u015fpazlar\u0131 y\u0131\u011f\u0131lsayd\u0131 bel\u0259 ,\u00f6z nadir yem\u0259kl\u0259ri il\u0259 m\u0259ni heyran qoya bilm\u0259zdil\u0259r.\u00c7\u00fcnki s\u00fcfr\u0259mizd\u0259 t\u0259bi\u0259tin bitirdiyi ,m\u0259nim \u00f6z \u0259ll\u0259riml\u0259 y\u0131\u011fd\u0131\u011f\u0131m,n\u0259n\u0259min b\u0259h-b\u0259hl\u0259 t\u0259mizl\u0259yib ar\u0131tlay\u0131b bi\u015firdiyi penc\u0259r var idi .Bundan ba\u015fqa k\u0259nd klunariyas\u0131nda x\u0259mir x\u00f6r\u0259kl\u0259rin \u00e7e\u015fidl\u0259ri daha \u00e7ox olard\u0131.X\u0259ng\u0259l,\u0259ri\u015ft\u0259 qa\u015f\u0131qx\u0259ng\u0259li,umac,xa\u015f\u0131l,g\u00f6y k\u0259t\u0259si,- bu yem\u0259kl\u0259rin dad\u0131ndan doymaq olmazd\u0131.Deyirdim,-ay n\u0259n\u0259 x\u0259ng\u0259l ,-deyirdi i\u015fl\u0259r oldu \u0259ng\u0259l.Bu da o dem\u0259k idi ki x\u0259mir yo\u011furmaq laz\u0131md\u0131 ona da m\u0259nim heyim yoxdu .X\u0259miri m\u0259n yo\u011furaram ,-deyirdim. K\u00f6m\u0259yim n\u0259n\u0259min xo\u015funa g\u0259lirdi,\u0259lin\u0259 bax\u0131b \u00f6yr\u0259nirdim . Vallah -billah g\u00fcc\u00fcm \u00e7atm\u0131r, qolumun biri b\u0259rk a\u011fr\u0131y\u0131r,-deyirdi.Dediyin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 bu babam\u0131n otuz il \u0259vv\u0259l a\u011facla vurdu\u011fu h\u0259min qoldur .N\u0259n\u0259m bu \u0259hvalat\u0131 d\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 xat\u0131rlad\u0131rd\u0131 v\u0259 indi lap yerin\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc .M\u0259n\u0259 q\u0259rib\u0259 g\u0259lirdi,- nec\u0259 ola bil\u0259r ki ,otuz il \u0259vv\u0259l vurulan qol indi a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131n.Ax\u0131 bu a\u011fr\u0131yan qoldan ba\u015fqa n\u0259n\u0259min yax\u015f\u0131 xatir\u0259l\u0259ri d\u0259 olmaya bilm\u0259zdi.Amma dey\u0259s\u0259n xatir\u0259l\u0259ri d\u0259 qolu q\u0259d\u0259r az a\u011fr\u0131m\u0131rd\u0131. H\u0259r halda babamla o boyda \u00f6m\u00fcr ya\u015fam\u0131\u015fd\u0131lar, bir yast\u0131\u011fa ba\u015f qoymu\u015fdular, o\u011ful -u\u015faq b\u00f6y\u00fctm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcl\u0259r. Amma n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 yada d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n otuz ild\u0259n sonra a\u011fr\u0131yan qolun tarix\u00e7\u0259siydu. – Ba\u015f\u0131m qar\u0131\u015fd\u0131 s\u00fcd da\u015fd\u0131 ,yerl\u0259 bir oldu ,baban quca\u011f\u0131mdak\u0131 odunun birini g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb z\u0259rbn\u0259n qoluma nec\u0259 vurdusa ,qolum yan\u0131ma d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc .Gec\u0259 a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131ndan yata bilm\u0259dim .S\u0259h\u0259r qalxd\u0131m, odu -budu daha a\u011fr\u0131mad\u0131 – dey\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m bu ba\u015f\u0131 b\u0259lal\u0131 qolun hekay\u0259tini tez -tez m\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131 ki, h\u0259tta m\u00fcharib\u0259d\u0259 kantuziya alan bir adam \u00f6z d\u0259rdini bel\u0259 yanq\u0131l\u0131 dan\u0131\u015fa bilm\u0259zdi .Lakin m\u0259n\u0259 maraql\u0131 g\u0259l\u0259n otuz il ke\u00e7\u0259nn\u0259n sonra bu qolun t\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n a\u011fr\u0131mas\u0131yd\u0131. Yen\u0259 deyir\u0259m, n\u0259n\u0259min \u00f6mr\u00fcnd\u0259 maraql\u0131 anlar sevincli, f\u0259r\u0259hli g\u00fcnl\u0259r d\u0259 \u00e7ox olub.Amma n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 qolunun a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131 bilm\u0259rr\u0259 olaraq o xatir\u0259l\u0259ri xat\u0131rlama\u011fa qoymurdu. O xatir\u0259l\u0259r\u0259 sip\u0259r olmu\u015fdu, q\u0259nim k\u0259silmi\u015fdi.El\u0259 bil bu boyda \u00f6m\u00fcrd\u0259 qazanc\u0131 t\u0259kc\u0259 sa\u011f qolunun a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131 olub ,v\u0259ssalam …X\u00fclas\u0259 m\u0259n x\u0259miri h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 yo\u011fururdum.Bu bacar\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 d\u0259 xo\u015f g\u0259lirdi. Sonralar x\u0259mir yayma\u011f\u0131 ,qa\u015f\u0131qx\u0259ng\u0259li , \u0259ri\u015ft\u0259 k\u0259sm\u0259yi, k\u0259t\u0259 bi\u015firm\u0259yi,-q\u0131sas\u0131 x\u0259mir x\u00f6r\u0259kl\u0259r\u0259 aid n\u0259 varsa ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6yr\u0259ndim .H\u0259tta n\u0259n\u0259m zarafatla deyirdi ki \u00f6yr\u0259ns\u0259n yax\u015f\u0131d\u0131r ,g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259kd\u0259 b\u0259lk\u0259 arvad\u0131n\u0131n \u0259lind\u0259n bi\u015f -d\u00fc\u015f g\u0259lm\u0259di Cincilim k\u0259t\u0259sinin dad\u0131 bir ba\u015fqayd\u0131 . Ke\u015fni\u015fini ,so\u011fan\u0131n\u0131 \u0259lav\u0259 edib \u015f\u0131rha\u015f\u0131r suyun alt\u0131nda yax\u015f\u0131-yax\u015f\u0131 yuyub do\u011frayard\u0131q .Suyu \u00e7\u0259kil\u0259rdi .Sonra penc\u0259ri x\u0259mirin aras\u0131na yay\u0131b bir az da motal \u015foru qatard\u0131q. Pe\u00e7d\u0259 ,yaxud sacda bi\u015fir\u0259rdik .Bi\u015f\u0259n kimi d\u0259 isti -isti n\u0259hr\u0259 ya\u011f\u0131 il\u0259 genin\u0259 -boluna ya\u011flay\u0131b b\u0259h -b\u0259hl\u0259 yey\u0259rdik .\u018flimizd\u0259n ,doda\u011f\u0131m\u0131zdan ya\u011f s\u00fcz\u00fcl\u0259rdi . \u018ftrin\u0259 ,dad\u0131ndan doymaq olmazd\u0131 .Baxmayaraq ki \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259n ill\u0259r ke\u00e7ib o k\u0259t\u0259nin dad\u0131 h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 dama\u011f\u0131mdan getm\u0259yib .Quzuqula\u011f\u0131ndan,pi\u015fikcayna\u011f\u0131ndan,yarp\u0131zdan ,lilpardan bi\u015firil\u0259n dov\u011faya dov\u011fa \u00e7atmazd\u0131
\n****
\nPenc\u0259r y\u0131\u011fan qon\u015fu q\u0131zlar\u0131 h\u0259y\u0259timiz\u0259 h\u0259s\u0259dl\u0259 boylanard\u0131lar .H\u0259y\u0259timizd\u0259 penc\u0259r ba\u015fqa yerl\u0259rd\u0259n daha \u00e7ox v\u0259 s\u0131x bit\u0259rdi .Amma babamnan \u00e7\u0259kin\u0259rdil\u0259r.M\u0259nim u\u015faq \u00fcr\u0259yim buna d\u00f6zm\u0259zdi.Babam evd\u0259 olmayanda \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rard\u0131m ki ,g\u0259lin n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r ist\u0259yirsiniz y\u0131\u011f\u0131n ,apar\u0131n. G\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u0259 ,g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u0259 h\u0259y\u0259t\u0259 dolu\u015furdular .Q\u0131zlar\u0131n \u0259ll\u0259rini g\u00f6rm\u0259k olmurdu .Arada ba\u015flar\u0131n\u0131 qald\u0131r\u0131b ” \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259n g\u0259l\u0259n o\u011flan”a da baxma\u011fa macal tap\u0131rd\u0131lar .\u0130\u00e7imd\u0259 h\u0259l\u0259 sevgi q\u0131\u011f\u0131lc\u0131mlar\u0131 olmasa da hiss edirdim ki ,onlar bu q\u0131\u011f\u0131lc\u0131mlar\u0131 m\u0259nd\u0259 oyatma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131lar .M\u0259n \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131m ki \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc bir o q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259 \u0259f\u0259l g\u00f6st\u0259rm\u0259yim. \u00dcz\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00fcl\u0259nin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fcm ,s\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00fcl\u0259nin s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 .B\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259ni ,n\u0259rgizi d\u0259 h\u0259min o q\u0131zlar tan\u0131td\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259…Penc\u0259r y\u0131\u011f\u0131b qurtard\u0131lar.Biz\u0259 d\u0259 b\u00f6l\u00fcb verdil\u0259r. Bir az dinc\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259n sonra b\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259- b\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259 oynad\u0131q.
\nBir oyun oynad\u0131q ad\u0131ma layiq
\nB\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259 b\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259
\nb\u0259nd\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259
\nbizd\u0259n siz\u0259 kim d\u00fc\u015f\u0259
\nXaliq…
\nSonra m\u0259ni b\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259 kolunun yan\u0131na apard\u0131lar .B\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259l\u0259r el\u0259 bil bizi g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdi.D\u0259rilm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u00fcr\u0259kl\u0259ri gedirdi .
\n–D\u0259r onlar\u0131 ,Xaliq ,tez ol d\u0259r,-q\u0131zlar xorla dill\u0259ndil\u0259r
\nBir qoma b\u0259n\u00f6v\u0259 d\u0259rdim v\u0259 qalib \u0259sg\u0259r kimi q\u0131zlara baxd\u0131m.
\n\u0130ndi qoman\u0131 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcm\u00fczd\u0259n birimiz\u0259 verm\u0259lis\u0259n, – g\u00fcl\u0259r\u00fcz q\u0131z dedi
\n\u018fc\u0259b yerd\u0259 ax\u015famlam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. H\u0259r\u0259niz\u0259 bir qoma y\u0131\u011f\u0131m, -dey\u0259nd\u0259 q\u0131zlar g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcl\u0259r v\u0259 y\u00fcz faiz \u0259min oldular ki ,onlar\u0131n dediyi m\u0259n\u0259 \u00e7atmay\u0131b.
\nYox ham\u0131m\u0131za laz\u0131m deyil s\u0259n bu b\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259ni \u00fcr\u0259yin ist\u0259y\u0259n\u0259 verm\u0259lis\u0259n.
\n“\u00dcr\u0259yi ist\u0259y\u0259n\u0259”s\u00f6z\u00fc m\u0259ni h\u0259m \u00e7a\u015fd\u0131rd\u0131 ,h\u0259m d\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259kl\u0259ndirdi .\u00dcr\u0259yim tez -tez d\u00f6y\u00fcnm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131 .\u018fm\u0259lli ba\u015fl\u0131 h\u0259y\u0259canland\u0131m.Eyni g\u00f6zl\u0259 baxd\u0131\u011f\u0131m q\u0131zlar\u0131n birin\u0259 indi tamam ba\u015fqa bir g\u00f6zl\u0259 baxmal\u0131 idim \u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc \u0259l\u0259 ald\u0131m, \u0259limd\u0259rki b\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259 qomas\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn i\u00e7in\u0259 intizar qar\u0131\u015f\u0131q m\u0259z\u0259yl\u0259 baxan bu \u00fc\u00e7 q\u0131zdan birin\u0259 , -\u00fcr\u0259yimd\u0259 sevg\u0131 q\u0131\u011f\u0131lc\u0131m\u0131n\u0131n t\u0259m\u0259lini qoyan “\u00fcr\u0259yi ist\u0259y\u0259n\u0259” s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc dey\u0259n q\u0131za uzatd\u0131m . M\u0259nim ,on \u00fc\u00e7 ya\u015fl\u0131 u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n sevgi d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131n q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 lenti h\u0259min o sehirli s\u00f6zl\u0259 k\u0259sildi -“\u00dcr\u0259yin ist\u0259y\u0259n\u0259”… Seginin u\u015faql\u0131q m\u0259rh\u0259l\u0259sin\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259m qoydum .Sonra bir ne\u00e7\u0259 daf\u0259 o q\u0131za sevgi m\u0259ktubu yazd\u0131m .\u018fvv\u0259l -\u0259vv\u0259l ,- “o b\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259ni m\u0259n\u0259 ver\u0259nd\u0259 bildim ki, ki\u015fi adamsan ,m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259t\u0259 layiqs\u0259n” ,-dey\u0259 \u0259m\u0259lli -ba\u015fl\u0131 s\u00f6zl\u0259r yaz\u0131rd\u0131 .Amma bir m\u00fcdd\u0259t sonra s\u0259si x\u0131r\u0131p k\u0259sildi.Q\u0131zlardan biri dedi ki, onun b\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259 ald\u0131\u011f\u0131 o\u011flan t\u0259k s\u0259n deyils\u0259n. A\u011fl\u0131n\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131na yi\u011f get i\u015finl\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful ol, baban bils\u0259 pi\u015fiyini a\u011faca \u00e7\u0131xardacaq .M\u00fcq\u0259dd\u0259s sevgini m\u0259zh\u0259k\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7evir\u0259n o q\u0131za nifr\u0259tim bir\u0259 -be\u015f artd\u0131. U\u015faq da olsam \u0259l\u0259 sal\u0131nd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 hiss el\u0259dim .H\u0259m d\u0259 bu m\u0259n\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fck d\u0259rs oldu. B\u0259n\u00f6v\u015f\u0259 koluna t\u0259r\u0259f getdim .\u018fyilib \u00fczr ist\u0259dim…
\n*****
\nT\u0259p\u0259l in\u0259yimizin yax\u015f\u0131 ya\u011fl\u0131 s\u00fcd\u00fc olurdu.N\u0259n\u0259m s\u0259h\u0259rl\u0259r s\u00fcdl\u00fc yayma bi\u015firirdi .H\u0259r d\u0259f\u0259 s\u00fcd\u00fc bi\u015firib qat\u0131q \u00e7alanda \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcn qayma\u011f\u0131n\u0131 y\u0131\u011f\u0131b ayr\u0131 qaba t\u00f6k\u0259rdi .Bunun ad\u0131na y\u0131\u011f\u0131nt\u0131 dey\u0259rdik ki, bu da bir xeyli y\u0131\u011f\u0131landan sonra n\u0259hr\u0259y\u0259 t\u00f6k\u00fcb \u00e7alxalayard\u0131q .N\u0259hr\u0259ni qurmaqda n\u0259n\u0259m\u0259 k\u00f6m\u0259k ed\u0259rdim.Bir yaxmal\u0131q ya\u011fa g\u00f6r\u0259 i\u015f\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 giri\u015f\u0259rdim.Sonra n\u0259n\u0259m ya\u011f\u0131 toplay\u0131b bir qaba y\u0131\u011fard\u0131. Nec\u0259 dey\u0259rl\u0259r, ya\u011f\u0131 ya\u011f ,ayran\u0131 ayranl\u0131q .Z\u0259hm\u0259t haqq\u0131ma veril\u0259n isti k\u00fcrs\u00fc \u00e7\u00f6r\u0259yi il\u0259 ya\u011f yaxmas\u0131n\u0131 i\u015ftahla yey\u0259rdim .Yeri g\u0259lmi\u015fk\u0259n deyim ki ,el\u0259 halal z\u0259hm\u0259tin b\u0259hr\u0259sini d\u0259 o bir yaxmal\u0131q n\u0259hr\u0259 ya\u011f\u0131n\u0131n dad\u0131nda hiss el\u0259dim .Yaxmadan di\u015fl\u0259dikc\u0259 qolumun v\u0259 dizimin a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 unudurdum.
\nHam\u0131 kimi bizim d\u0259 xeyli \u0259kin sah\u0259miz vard\u0131 .Bu boyda sah\u0259ni \u0259kib bec\u0259rm\u0259k babam n\u0259n\u0259m v\u0259 m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn o q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259 asan ba\u015fa g\u0259lmirdi.M\u0259n i\u015f\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 qat\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131m. Baxmayaraq ki , ya\u015f\u0131m buna \u00e7ox imkan vermirdi .\u018fvv\u0259lc\u0259 torpa\u011f\u0131 bell\u0259yirdik. Aprel ay\u0131nda kartof s\u0259pini ba\u015flay\u0131rd\u0131.Pay\u0131zdan se\u00e7diyimiz v\u0259 t\u00f6vl\u0259nin bir k\u00fcnc\u00fcnd\u0259 \u00fcst\u00fcn\u00fc yax\u015f\u0131 -yax\u015f\u0131 \u00f6rt\u00fcb c\u00fcc\u0259rtdiyimiz toxumluq kartoflar\u0131 vedr\u0259- vedr\u0259 sah\u0259y\u0259 da\u015f\u0131y\u0131rd\u0131q .C\u0259rg\u0259 il\u0259 qaz\u0131lan yalaqlara iriliyind\u0259n x\u0131rdal\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan as\u0131l\u0131 olaraq bir yaxud iki kartof qoyub \u00fcst\u00fcn\u00fc torpaqla \u00f6rt\u00fcrd\u00fck.Bel\u0259c\u0259 iki – \u00fcc g\u00fcn\u0259 s\u0259pin ba\u015fa \u00e7at\u0131rd\u0131.N\u00f6vb\u0259ti i\u015fimiz iyun iyul aylar\u0131nda davam edirdi. K\u00f6rp\u0259 \u015ftill\u0259ri alaq otlar\u0131ndan t\u0259mizl\u0259yirdik,dibl\u0259rini bo\u015fald\u0131rd\u0131q.Ad\u0131na \u00e7apa dediyimiz al\u0259tl\u0259 m\u0259n bu i\u015f\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 giri\u015firdim,n\u0259n\u0259min dediyin\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 onlar\u0131 yar\u0131d\u0131rd\u0131m.Babam bir az x\u0259st\u0259 idi . Bir- iki l\u0259k yum\u015faldard\u0131 sonra \u00e7apaya s\u00f6yk\u0259nib bir xeyli da\u011flara t\u0259r\u0259f baxard\u0131 . El\u0259 bil da\u011flardan \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00fcc ist\u0259yirdi . V\u0259 az ke\u00e7mirdi ki da\u011flardan g\u00fcc al\u0131rm\u0131\u015f kimi bir xeyli i\u015f g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fc. Amma n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r olmasa da k\u0259ndin g\u00fcn\u0259muzd i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259nl\u0259rin\u0259 ehtiyac duyulurdu.G\u00fcn\u00fc bir toyu\u011fa i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259n qad\u0131n vard\u0131 ki, n\u0259n\u0259m onu h\u0259r il k\u00f6m\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131. G\u00f6r\u00fcl\u0259n i\u015fl\u0259rd\u0259n sonra bol m\u0259hsul y\u0131\u011fmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn pay\u0131z\u0131n tez glm\u0259sini arzulama\u011fa d\u0259y\u0259rdi.Bu o vaxt idi ki ,kartof \u015faxlar\u0131 tamam quruyub yer\u0259 s\u0259ril\u0259rdi. \u015eax\u0131n bu i\u015fi onun, boy qald\u0131r\u0131b b\u0259hr\u0259 ver\u0259nd\u0259n sonra t\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n yer\u0259 \u0259yilib torpa\u011fa minn\u0259tdarl\u0131q el\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 b\u0259nz\u0259yirdi.M\u0259n ilk d\u0259f\u0259 kartof qazanda beli d\u00fcz bat\u0131rm\u0131rd\u0131m Kartoflar\u0131 yar\u0131bayar\u0131 t\u0259n ortadan k\u0259sirdim.S\u0259hvimd\u0259n utan\u0131rd\u0131m .-A pir olmu\u015fun n\u0259v\u0259si beli bir az aral\u0131dan bat\u0131rsana ,kartoflar\u0131n anas\u0131n\u0131 a\u011flatd\u0131n ax\u0131 ,–dey\u0259n babam\u0131n yum\u015faq danla\u011f\u0131 m\u0259suliyy\u0259timi xeyli art\u0131rd\u0131 Qaz\u0131lan kartoflar bo\u015f yer se\u00e7ilib ora t\u00f6k\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fc.K\u0259nardan baxanda deyirdin ki b\u00f6y\u00fck t\u0259p\u0259dir. \u0130rili -xirdal\u0131 bu kartoflar\u0131 bir ne\u00e7\u0259 yer\u0259 ay\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131q.Satmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ,n\u00f6vb\u0259ti ild\u0259 toxumluq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ,aran toxumu ,\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz\u0259 yem\u0259y\u0259,sonda qaz kartofu .Aran toxumu o dem\u0259k idi ki ,\u015e\u0259mkir ,Tovuz kimi rayonlardan bu kartofu toxumluq alma\u011fa g\u0259lirdil\u0259r.O yerl\u0259rin m\u0259hsulundan n\u00f6vb\u0259ti il\u0259 toxumluq g\u00f6t\u00fcrm\u0259k olmurdu .Orada kartofu suvarma \u00fcsulu il\u0259 yeti\u015fdirirdil\u0259r Torpaq da bizim torpaqlar\u0131n g\u00fcc\u00fcnd\u0259 deyildi .Qaz kartofuna da ayd\u0131nl\u0131q g\u0259tirim :Bunlar lap x\u0131rda yaxud k\u0259silmi\u015f kartoflar idi .Qaz\u0131n ad\u0131na olmas\u0131na baxmayaraq dig\u0259r heyvanlar\u0131n da yemin\u0259 qat\u0131rd\u0131lar .Toyuq -c\u00fcc\u0259 d\u0259 dad\u0131na bax\u0131rd\u0131 .Amma qaz q\u0259d\u0259r l\u0259zz\u0259tl\u0259 yey\u0259n olmurdu…
\nBazarda kartof satm\u011fa n\u0259 babam\u0131n h\u0259v\u0259si vard\u0131 ,n\u0259 d\u0259 m\u0259nim ya\u015f\u0131m imkan verirdi.Qap\u0131dan bir ba\u015fa alver\u00e7il\u0259r\u0259 sat\u0131rd\u0131q.Pay\u0131zda k\u0259ndd\u0259 zil ma\u015f\u0131nlar\u0131n \u0259lind\u0259n t\u0259rp\u0259nm\u0259k olmurdu. Amma \u00f6z\u00fc apar\u0131b bazarda satan da \u00e7ox olurdu.H\u0259min vaxtda kimi soru\u015furdunsa — Bak\u0131ya ,yaxud dig\u0259r rayonlara kartof satma\u011fa gedib–deyirdil\u0259r.Caamat\u0131n g\u0259liri kolxozdan \u0259lav\u0259 \u0259sas\u0259n kartof sat\u0131\u015f\u0131ndan \u0259m\u0259l\u0259 g\u0259lirdi.Borc alan ,borc ver\u0259n ham\u0131s\u0131 kartof pulu il\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259nl\u0259\u015fdirilirdi .U\u015faq da d\u0259d\u0259sind\u0259n pul ist\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 m\u00fctl\u0259q kartofun sat\u0131l\u0131b sat\u0131lmamas\u0131n\u0131 n\u0259z\u0259r\u0259 almal\u0131 idi.Babam kartofdan g\u0259l\u0259n g\u0259lirimizi ba\u015f barma\u011f\u0131na t\u00fcp\u00fcr\u0259 -t\u00fcp\u00fcr\u0259 yan\u0131mdaca say\u0131rd\u0131 ,\u0259zilmi\u015f pullar\u0131 s\u0259liq\u0259y\u0259 sal\u0131rd\u0131,\u00e7inl\u0259yirdi .Bu pullar bizim illik ehtiyac\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 ba\u015faba\u015f \u00f6d\u0259yirdi.Cibind\u0259ki x\u0131rda pullar\u0131 topalay\u0131b g\u00fcl\u0259 -g\u00fcl\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 uzar\u0131rd\u0131 ki,-s\u0259nin d\u0259 z\u0259hm\u0259tin var ,g\u00f6t\u00fcr bu pullar\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 pe\u00e7enye al ye. Alma\u011fa t\u0259l\u0259sm\u0259zdim. X\u0131rda pullar\u0131 toplay\u0131b d\u00fckanda manata \u00e7evir\u0259rdim.H\u0259min o \u015fax manat\u0131 s\u0259liq\u0259 il\u0259 qatlay\u0131b cibim\u0259 qoyard\u0131m.Pullu ki\u015fil\u0259r kimi tez -tez \u0259limi cibim\u0259 salard\u0131m baqmaqlar\u0131m\u0131 \u015fax manata toxundurard\u0131m v\u0259 el\u0259 bil\u0259rdim d\u00fcnyan\u0131n \u0259n varl\u0131 adam\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259m . Amma m\u0259n\u0259vi d\u0259y\u0259ri d\u0259 unutmurdum. Babam h\u0259r d\u0259f\u0259- ,s\u0259n olmasan biz neyn\u0259rdik ,s\u0259ni ver\u0259n\u0259 \u015f\u00fck\u00fcr, -dey\u0259nd\u0259 is\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc d\u00fcnyan\u0131n \u0259n xo\u015fb\u0259xt u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 say\u0131rd\u0131m .Zarafat deyil be\u015finci sinifd\u0259 oxuma\u011f\u0131ma baxmayaraq \u0259lli kiloluq kartof kis\u0259sini k\u00fcr\u0259yimd\u0259 da\u015f\u0131y\u0131rd\u0131m.Belimin a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 gizl\u0259dirdim. Bu a\u011fr\u0131n\u0131n izi g\u0259l\u0259n kartof m\u00f6vs\u00fcm\u00fcn\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r qal\u0131rd\u0131.Art\u0131q ,g\u00fcn\u00fc bir toyu\u011fa i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259nl\u0259rd\u0259n d\u0259 \u00e7ox i\u015f g\u00f6r\u0259 bilirdim.Bir g\u00fcn x\u0259b\u0259r g\u0259ldi ki,b\u0259s \u015e\u0259milin d\u00fckan\u0131na kastyum g\u0259lib.Sinif yolda\u015f\u0131m\u0131n \u0259ynind\u0259 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm ,\u00e7ox xo\u015fuma g\u0259ldi.Fikirl\u0259\u015fdim ki babama deyim m\u0259n\u0259 d\u0259 als\u0131n.H\u0259y\u0259td\u0259 rastla\u015fd\u0131q.Qay\u011f\u0131l\u0131 oldu\u011fumu duyub -n\u0259 fikirl\u0259\u015firs\u0259n ,olmaya yen\u0259 \u015f\u0259h\u0259r yad\u0131na d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb, -dedi
\n-Yox baba ,ist\u0259yir\u0259m s\u0259n\u0259 bir s\u00f6z deyim,utan\u0131ram
\n–De ,utanma de g\u00f6r\u00fcm n\u0259 m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259di?
\n-\u015e\u0259milin d\u00fckan\u0131na kastyum g\u0259lib ,imkan varsa m\u0259n\u0259 d\u0259 bir d\u0259st al
\nBabam g\u00f6zl\u0259rini bir n\u00f6qt\u0259y\u0259 dikib fikr\u0259 getdi .M\u0259nim fikr\u0259 getm\u0259yim yalan oldu.\u00c7\u0259p\u0259rimizin u\u00e7ulmu\u015f da\u015flar\u0131 diqq\u0259tini h\u0259m\u0259n \u00e7\u0259kdi .Xeyli o da\u015flara baxd\u0131.Anlad\u0131m ki ,o da\u015flar\u0131 yerin\u0259 y\u0131\u011fma\u011f\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 tap\u015f\u0131rmaq ist\u0259yir. H\u0259tta o da\u015flar\u0131 kimin heyvanlar\u0131 t\u0259r\u0259find\u0259n u\u00e7ulmas\u0131n\u0131 da soru\u015fmad\u0131 .Danlamad\u0131 ki niy\u0259 baxmam\u0131san ,qorumam\u0131san. \u00c7ox sakit v\u0259 t\u0259mkinl\u0259 bax\u0131rd\u0131 da\u015flara. Bir yandan da bu kostyum s\u00f6hb\u0259ti \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ortaya. El\u0259 bil bu \u00e7\u0259p\u0259ri bil\u0259- bil\u0259 u\u00e7urmu\u015fdular ki, babas\u0131 Xaliq\u0259 u\u00e7ulmu\u015f da\u015flar\u0131 yerin\u0259 y\u0131\u011fd\u0131rs\u0131n v\u0259 \u0259v\u0259zind\u0259 ona t\u0259z\u0259 kastyum als\u0131n .\u00c7\u00fcnki ill\u0259riydi ki ,o \u00e7\u0259p\u0259r\u0259 heyvan aya\u011f\u0131 d\u0259ymirdi. V\u0259 inan\u0131rd\u0131m ki ,bu \u00e7\u0259p\u0259r olmasa da babam m\u0259n\u0259 bir i\u015f tapacaqd\u0131 . Kastyumu havay\u0131 geyin\u0259 bilm\u0259zdim
\nBax o da\u011f\u0131lan da\u015flar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcrs\u0259nmi ,onlar yerin\u0259 y\u0131g ,sonra ged\u0259k alaq
\n\u00c7\u0259tinlikl\u0259 d\u0259 olsa i\u015fi yerin\u0259 yetirdim.H\u0259tta \u00f6t\u00fcb ke\u00e7\u0259nl\u0259rd\u0259n -bu u\u015fa\u011fa niy\u0259 z\u00fcl\u00fcm verirl\u0259r -q\u0131na\u011f\u0131n\u0131 da e\u015fitdim.Amma q\u0131naqdan ke\u00e7mi\u015fdi .Ortada kastyum s\u00f6hb\u0259ti vard\u0131…\u0130\u015fimi qurtard\u0131m. Babam\u0131n xo\u015funa g\u0259ldi.Bir xeyli baxd\u0131 v\u0259 g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u00fcnd\u00fc .D\u00fc\u015f qaba\u011f\u0131ma ,-dedi.
\nDeyil\u0259n\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 kostyum \u0259ynim\u0259 \u00e7ox yara\u015f\u0131rd\u0131 .V\u0259 bird\u0259n m\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259ldi ki kostyumun cibl\u0259ri h\u0259m d\u0259 qabarl\u0131 \u0259ll\u0259rimi gizl\u0259tm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnd\u00fcr…
\nK\u0259ndimizin gec\u0259si d\u0259 g\u00fcnd\u00fcz\u00fc kimi g\u00f6z\u0259l olur .\u0130llah da g\u00f6y\u00fcn \u00fcz\u00fc a\u00e7\u0131q olanda ulduzlara baxmaqdan doymurdum, onlar\u0131 sayma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131m .Sonra g\u00f6rd\u00fcm ki, say\u0131b ax\u0131ra \u00e7atd\u0131rmaq m\u00fcmk\u00fcn deyil .M\u00fctl\u0259q ya art\u0131q , ya da \u0259skik g\u0259lirdi. N\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259nim bu u\u015faq mara\u011f\u0131ma g\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fc.-G\u0259l -g\u0259l ev\u0259 soyuqdu,aya salavat \u00e7evir ,g\u0259l -o boyda ulduzu sayma\u011fa bir insan \u00f6mr\u00fc b\u0259s el\u0259m\u0259z .N\u0259n\u0259min s\u0259si m\u0259ni ulduz saymaqdan “xilas” el\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259 ,k\u0259ndin gec\u0259sin\u0259 mara\u011f\u0131m\u0131 azaltm\u0131rd\u0131.Qaranl\u0131qda qap\u0131 itl\u0259rinin s\u0259si k\u0259ndin sakitliyini pozurd\u0131 .Sayr\u0131\u015fan ulduzlarla bu s\u0259s d\u00fcz g\u0259lm\u0259zdi .Amma adam bu s\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259 \u00f6yr\u0259\u015fir v\u0259 it s\u0259si e\u015fitm\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 k\u0259ndin gec\u0259l\u0259rini yar\u0131m\u00e7\u0131q hiss el\u0259yirs\u0259n,el\u0259 bil n\u0259s\u0259 \u00e7atm\u0131r l\u0259l\u0259 k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcb ,yurdu qal\u0131b .G\u00fcnd\u00fcz e\u015f\u015f\u0259kl\u0259rin s\u0259si k\u0259ndi ba\u015f\u0131na g\u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fcy\u00fc halda ,gec\u0259l\u0259r itl\u0259rin s\u0259si meydan sulay\u0131rd\u0131 .Az ev tap\u0131lar ki ,qap\u0131s\u0131nda iti olmas\u0131n Baxmayaraq ki m\u00fcxt\u0259lif tonda s\u0259sl\u0259r \u00e7\u0131xararaq g\u00fcl kimi gec\u0259ni s\u0259ssizliy\u0259 h\u0259sr\u0259t qoyurlar ,a\u011f\u0131z -a\u011f\u0131za verib ula\u015f\u0131rlar .S\u0259m\u0259d Vur\u011fun yaz\u0131rd\u0131- “A\u011f\u0131ls\u0131z k\u00f6p\u0259kl\u0259r ulduza h\u00fcr\u0259r” .B\u0259lk\u0259 el\u0259 do\u011frudan da ulduza h\u00fcr\u00fcb onlar\u0131 h\u00fcrk\u00fcd\u00fcrd\u00fcl\u0259r ki, m\u0259n saya bilm\u0259yim .Eh u\u015faq a\u011fl\u0131 ki ,u\u015faq a\u011fl\u0131… Gec\u0259l\u0259r itini bil\u0259r\u0259kd\u0259n ,ya bilm\u0259d\u0259n z\u0259ncird\u0259n a\u00e7\u0131q qoyanlar da olurdu .Vay o g\u00fcn\u0259 ki, k\u0259nd iti s\u0259ni tuta ,-itliyinu s\u00fcbut etm\u0259yinc\u0259 \u0259l c\u0259km\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k. Bizim itimiz yox idi .V\u0259 he\u00e7 arzusunda da deyildim. Onsuz da k\u0259ndd\u0259 qald\u0131\u011f\u0131m m\u00fcdd\u0259td\u0259 kimins\u0259 mal\u0131n\u0131n o\u011furland\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 e\u015fitm\u0259dim. Amma nec\u0259 olursa -olsun o\u011fru oldu olmad\u0131, k\u0259ndi itsiz t\u0259s\u0259vv\u00fcr el\u0259m\u0259k \u00e7\u0259tindi. K\u0259nd\u00e7il\u0259rim\u0259 h\u0259yan olan, onlar\u0131n \u00f6zl\u0259rinin, \u0259mlaklar\u0131n\u0131n ke\u015fiyini \u00e7\u0259k\u0259n bu qap\u0131 itl\u0259rinin d\u0259 aqib\u0259ti he\u00e7 d\u0259 e\u015f\u015f\u0259kl\u0259rd\u0259n dala qalm\u0131rd\u0131 .M\u0259n bir d\u0259f\u0259 d\u0259, at o\u011flu, qo\u00e7 o\u011flu, \u0130n\u0259k o\u011flu ,k\u0259l\u0259 o\u011flu s\u00f6zl\u0259rini e\u015fitm\u0259dim .Amma e\u015f\u015f\u0259k o\u011flu ,it o\u011flu deyimini add\u0131m ba\u015f\u0131 e\u015fidirdim.V\u0259 o boyda ev -e\u015fiyi qoruyan, gec\u0259l\u0259r yatmayan, r\u0259ngb\u0259r\u0259ng s\u0259sl\u0259ri il\u0259 yoldan ke\u00e7\u0259nl\u0259ri s\u0259ks\u0259ndirib qorxudan bu itl\u0259r \u0259m\u0259lli -ba\u015fl\u0131 t\u0259hqir olunurdular. Bu t\u0259hqirin d\u0259 tarixi el\u0259 itin yaran\u0131\u015f\u0131 q\u0259d\u0259rdi .\u0130nsanlar bir -birl\u0259rini t\u0259hqir ed\u0259nd\u0259 lap rahatca bu heyvan\u0131n ad\u0131ndan istifad\u0259 edirdil\u0259r .-S\u0259n it o\u011flusan ,it g\u00fcn\u00fcnd\u0259 ya\u015fay\u0131rsan, it kimi h\u00fcr\u00fcrs\u0259n ,can\u0131n it can\u0131d\u0131 -s\u00f6zl\u0259ri adi hal alm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Eyn\u0259n e\u015f\u015f\u0259kl\u0259rin aqib\u0259ti kimi, -sahibin\u0259 canla -ba\u015fla xidm\u0259t el\u0259 ax\u0131rda da t\u0259hqir olun .\u00c7ox g\u00fcman ki, n\u0259 vaxtsa b\u0259db\u0259xt e\u015f\u015f\u0259kl\u0259r kimi bu b\u0259db\u0259xt itl\u0259r d\u0259 iki ayaqlar\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcst\u0259 qalxacaqlqr, adlar\u0131n\u0131n t\u0259hqir olunmas\u0131na qar\u015f\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xacaqlar. Heyvan h\u00fcquqlar\u0131n\u0131n m\u00fcdaf\u0131\u0259si komit\u0259si itl\u0259rin yaln\u0131z fiziki qay\u011f\u0131lar\u0131n\u0131n deyil, h\u0259m d\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259n t\u0259hqir olunmalar\u0131n\u0131n qar\u015f\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 alma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015facaq. \u0130nsanlardan tutulan c\u0259rim\u0259 pullar\u0131 n\u0259inki k\u0259ndimizd\u0259 h\u0259tta d\u00fcnyadak\u0131 itl\u0259rin maddi durumuna enin\u0259 d\u0259 uzununa da b\u0259s ed\u0259\u00e7\u0259k Bir qab yaldan \u00f6t\u0259ri gedib kimins\u0259 qap\u0131s\u0131nda ulamayacaqlar.
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\nK\u0259nd \u0259halisinin \u0259s\u0259s g\u0259lir m\u0259nb\u0259yi h\u0259y\u0259tyan\u0131 sah\u0259d\u0259n v\u0259 kalxozdan olurdu Ustal\u0131qla m\u0259\u015f\u011ful olanlar bir-iki n\u0259f\u0259r olard\u0131, ya olmazd\u0131 .Bizim qon\u015fumuz Qara o\u011flu Abbas yax\u015f\u0131 d\u00fclg\u0259r idi .Ya\u015f\u0131 doxsan\u0131 haqlam\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ,amma mismar\u0131 d\u00f6\u015f\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 az qala yumru\u011fuyla vururdu .D\u00f6\u015f\u0259m\u0259 ,tavan i\u015fl\u0259rin\u0259 bax\u0131rd\u0131 \u00c7\u0259kici el\u0259 z\u0259rbl\u0259 vururdu ki ,\u0259zray\u0131l ona yax\u0131n g\u0259lm\u0259sin. Amma \u0259zray\u0131l da \u0259zray\u0131ld\u0131.G\u00fcnl\u0259rin birind\u0259 qoca d\u00fclg\u0259rin \u00e7\u0259kici yer\u0259 qoyma\u011f\u0131nnan \u0259zray\u0131l\u0131n onu oppalara aparma\u011f\u0131 bir oldu …Dediyim kimi k\u0259ndd\u0259 usta \u00e7ox az idi .Usta i\u015fin\u0259 ehtiyac\u0131 olanlar “Ba\u015fk\u0259nd”d\u0259n erm\u0259ni ustalar\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rard\u0131lar. \u018fll\u0259rind\u0259n h\u0259r i\u015f g\u0259lirdi -h\u00f6rg\u00fc h\u00f6rm\u0259k,d\u00f6\u015f\u0259m\u0259 vurmaq ,evin \u00fcst\u00fcn\u00fc \u00e7atmaq v\u0259 dig\u0259r tikinti i\u015fl\u0259ri g\u00f6rm\u0259kd\u0259 bacar\u0131ql\u0131 idil\u0259r …Bir d\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fcn , \u00e7ay\u0131n k\u0259nar\u0131nda ocaq qalan\u0131b ,qazan as\u0131l\u0131b .O saat bilm\u0259k olurdu ki, hans\u0131sa evd\u0259n erm\u0259ni ustalar i\u015fl\u0259rini qurtar\u0131b y\u0131\u011f\u0131\u015f\u0131b gedib .Arvadlar erm\u0259nil\u0259rin \u0259ll\u0259ri n\u0259y\u0259 d\u0259yibs\u0259 ,n\u0259d\u0259n istifad\u0259 edibl\u0259rs\u0259 -yor\u011fan, d\u00f6\u015f\u0259k ,bo\u015fqab ,st\u0259kan qa\u015f\u0131q -ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 qaynad\u0131rd\u0131lar ,suya \u00e7\u0259kirdil\u0259r,g\u00fcn\u0259 verirdil\u0259r.Xatirimd\u0259di , Fatma arvad qa\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131 qumla el\u0259 s\u00fcrt\u00fcrd\u00fc ki ,dey\u0259rdin ona c\u0259za verilib. Bu t\u0259mizlik m\u0259rasimin\u0259 u\u015faq mara\u011f\u0131mla baxa -baxa soru\u015furdum ki ,ay Fatma xala, bunlar\u0131 niy\u0259 bel\u0259 cani -dild\u0259n s\u00fcrt\u00fcrs\u0259n, qa\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n can\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131 ax\u0131 .S\u00fcrt\u0259 -s\u00fcrt\u0259 d\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 qald\u0131r\u0131b \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 bax\u0131rd\u0131,- o\u011flum s\u0259n h\u0259l\u0259 u\u015faqsan ,amma deyim bird\u0259f\u0259lik bil .M\u0259n\u0259 xo\u015fdumu bu q\u0259d\u0259r y\u00fck\u00fc e\u015f\u015f\u0259y\u0259 y\u00fckl\u0259 ,\u00e7ay\u0131n q\u0131ra\u011f\u0131na g\u0259tir ,art\u0131q odun yand\u0131r ,ocaq qala , qoyma haray .Bunlara kafir \u0259li d\u0259yib, ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrs\u0259nmi ,kafir \u0259li .Bel\u0259 s\u00fcrtm\u0259s\u0259m , axar suda d\u00f6n\u0259 -d\u00f6n\u0259 yumasam, qazanda qaynatmasam q\u0259tiyy\u0259n pak olmaz. Erm\u0259ni ustalar\u0131 i\u015fl\u0259rini qurtar\u0131b bu s\u0259h\u0259r getdil\u0259r. Yax\u015f\u0131 usta olsalar da dinl\u0259ri dinimizd\u0259n deyil …B\u00fct\u00fcn bu “dezinfeksiya” i\u015fl\u0259ri s\u0259h\u0259r g\u00fcn \u00e7\u0131xandan ax\u015fam g\u00fcn batana q\u0259d\u0259r davam edirdi.\u00d6z -\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 m\u0259t\u0259l qala -qala fikirl\u0259\u015firdim,-erm\u0259ninin dini dinimizd\u0259n deyils\u0259, kafirdis\u0259 , nat\u0259mizdis\u0259 k\u0259nd\u00e7il\u0259rim niy\u0259 onlar\u0131 evl\u0259rind\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 d\u0259v\u0259t edir .Sonra da \u00fc\u00e7 g\u00fcn i\u015fl\u0259dikl\u0259ri evd\u0259 bir aydan \u00e7ox t\u0259mizlik i\u00e7l\u0259ri apar\u0131rlar.Arvadlar\u0131na art\u0131q problem yarad\u0131rlar .\u018flb\u0259tt\u0259 k\u0259ndin ki\u015fil\u0259ri bu s\u0259n\u0259ti daha \u00e7ox \u00f6yr\u0259ns\u0259ydil\u0259r “Ba\u015fk\u0259nd”d\u0259n erm\u0259ni ustalar\u0131 \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rma\u011fa ehtiyac qalmazd\u0131 .Arvadlar da evi e\u015f\u015f\u0259y\u0259 y\u00fckl\u0259yib \u00e7ay\u0131n q\u0131ra\u011f\u0131na g\u0259tirm\u0259zdi \u0259lav\u0259 ocaq qalamazd\u0131 ,qa\u015f\u0131q ,st\u0259kan s\u00fcrtm\u0259kd\u0259n barmaqlar\u0131n\u0131 qum aparmazd\u0131 .Amma onu da anlad\u0131m ki, bu i\u015fl\u0259rin himi bel\u0259 qoyulubmu\u015f . K\u0259ndd\u0259 ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m m\u00fcdd\u0259td\u0259 dem\u0259k olar ki tez -tez \u00e7ay\u0131n k\u0259nar\u0131nda t\u00fcst\u00fcl\u0259n\u0259n ocaq g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fcm.H\u0259r\u00e7\u0259nd ki ,indi o ocaqlar \u00e7oxdan s\u00f6n\u00fcb …
\nK\u0259ndd\u0259 evl\u0259ri \u0259sas\u0259n a\u011facdan tik\u0259rdil\u0259r. X\u00fcsusi yonulmu\u015f haz\u0131rlanm\u0131\u015f bu a\u011faclar\u0131 bir – birin\u0259 ke\u00e7ir\u0259r\u0259k ev \u00e7atan ustalar\u0131n i\u00e7l\u0259rin\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 bax\u0131rd\u0131m Ota\u011f\u0131n a\u011fac divarlar\u0131 haz\u0131r olandan sonra onun \u00fcz\u0259rin\u0259 “drank” deyil\u0259n nazik k\u0259silmi\u015f a\u011faclar vurard\u0131lar ki , sar\u0131 pal\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131 saxlaya bilsin .Sar\u0131 pal\u00e7\u0131q x\u00fcsusi sar\u0131 torpaqdan haz\u0131rlan\u0131rd\u0131 .\u018fvv\u0259l bu i\u015f \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn geni\u015f yer d\u00fcz\u0259ldirdil\u0259r. Sar\u0131 torpa\u011f\u0131 h\u0259m\u0259n yer\u0259 t\u00f6k\u00fcrd\u00fcl\u0259r. Sonra \u00fcz\u0259rin\u0259 saman v\u0259 su \u0259lav\u0259 edirdil\u0259r. .N\u00f6vb\u0259 ata \u00e7at\u0131rd\u0131. \u00c7\u00fcnki pal\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131 at qar\u0131\u015fd\u0131rmal\u0131 idi .Xeyli miqdarda pal\u00e7\u0131q qat\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131na g\u00f6r\u0259 at \u0259m\u0259yin\u0259 ehtiyac duyulurdu. Dair\u0259vi \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 haz\u0131rlanan bu pal\u00e7\u0131q “meydan”\u0131nda at da el\u0259 dair\u0259vi h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259t edirdi ,sar\u0131 pal\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131na f\u0131rlan\u0131rd\u0131 .B\u0130r d\u0259f\u0259 qon\u015fumuz \u018fsg\u0259r \u0259mi bu i\u015fl\u0259r\u0259 maraqla baxd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcb m\u0259ni ata mindirdi .At dizin\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r \u00e7\u0131xan sar\u0131 pal\u00e7\u0131qda ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 sal\u0131b d\u00f6vr\u0259 vururdu .Qarn\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131 pal\u00e7\u0131q olmu\u015fdu . Quyru\u011funu qatlay\u0131b d\u00fcy\u00fcnl\u0259mi\u015fdil\u0259r ki, pal\u00e7\u0131\u011fa d\u0259ym\u0259sin . Ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131n bir -iki yerind\u0259 sar\u0131 n\u00f6qt\u0259l\u0259r var\u0131yd\u0131 ,v\u0259ssalam. Amma at sakit idi .Bilirdi ki ,i\u015fd\u0259n sonra onu apar\u0131b \u00e7ayda doyunca \u00e7imdir\u0259c\u0259kl\u0259r , qa\u015fovlayacaqlar ,qap\u0131ya g\u0259tirib qaba\u011f\u0131na ot qoyacaqlar. At c\u0259mi \u00fc\u00e7 d\u0259f\u0259 pal\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131na f\u0131rlanan kimi \u00fcr\u0259yim buland\u0131, ba\u015f\u0131m h\u0259rl\u0259ndi. Hal\u0131m\u0131n pis oldu\u011funu g\u00f6r\u00fcb \u018fsg\u0259r ki\u015fi m\u0259ni tez atdan d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrd\u00fc .N\u0259 oldu s\u0259n\u0259 a bala ,-soru\u015fdu Ki\u015fini pe\u015fiman el\u0259m\u0259m\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn tez \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc \u0259l\u0259 ald\u0131m. H\u0259r \u015fey yax\u015f\u0131d\u0131 deyib ,onun \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259ki nigaran\u00e7\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 qova bildim.Amma at\u0131n vecin\u0259 deyildi, n\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yi bulan\u0131rd\u0131 n\u0259 d\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131 f\u0131rlan\u0131rd\u0131. Bir \u00f6yn\u0259lik samana g\u00f6r\u0259 pal\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131n i\u00e7ind\u0259 v\u0131r\u00e7a-v\u0131r\u00e7 d\u00f6vr\u0259 vururdu. N\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 lap ki\u00e7ik ya\u015flar\u0131mdan karuseld\u0259 zadda \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc pis hiss el\u0259mi\u015f\u0259m. Benzin n\u0259di ki, onun qoxusunu g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u0259 bilmirdim .Dey\u0259c\u0259ksiniz at hara ,benzin hara . Amma s\u00f6z g\u0259li\u015fi yad\u0131ma d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc .S\u00f6hb\u0259tin birini qoyub o birin\u0259 gedir\u0259m . \u015e\u0259mkirin dolaylar\u0131n\u0131 zar\u0131ya -zar\u0131ya qalxan k\u00f6hn\u0259 “paz” avtobusunu benzinin iysind\u0259n \u00fcr\u0259yim buland\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan d\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 saxlatm\u0131\u015fam.- Saxla ,saxla u\u015faq qaytar\u0131r ay \u015fofer,s\u0259n Allah saxla ,\u00fcst ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131z it g\u00fcn\u00fcn\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259c\u0259k,-dey\u0259 yan\u0131mda oturanlar az qala s\u00fcr\u00fcc\u00fcy\u0259 yalvar\u0131rd\u0131lar . Yoxu\u015flarda ma\u015f\u0131n saxlama\u011f\u0131n \u00e7\u0259tinliuini o yollar\u0131 gedib g\u0259l\u0259nl\u0259r yax\u015f\u0131 bilir. S\u00fcr\u00fcc\u00fc yer se\u00e7ib avtobusu saxlayana q\u0259d\u0259r tulaqulaq papa\u011f\u0131m\u0131 a\u011fz\u00fcma tutub \u00f6\u00f6\u00f6 el\u0259m\u0259yiml\u0259 dolma\u011f\u0131 bir olurdu. Sonra da p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259 d\u0259r\u0259y\u0259 v\u0131z\u0131llad\u0131rd\u0131m. Yan\u0131mdak\u0131lar, -s\u00fcr -s\u00fcr saxlama h\u0259r \u015fey d\u00fcz\u0259ldi ,\u015f\u00fck\u00fcr yax\u015f\u0131 qurtard\u0131q,-deyib s\u00fcr\u00fcc\u00fcy\u0259 \u015fad x\u0259b\u0259r verirdil\u0259r. O ill\u0259rd\u0259 ne\u00e7\u0259 bel\u0259 bahal\u0131 tulaqulaq papa\u011f\u0131 s\u0131ld\u0131r\u0131m yoxu\u015fun dolaylar\u0131ndan d\u0259r\u0259y\u0259 vasil el\u0259mi\u015f\u0259m …Qay\u0131daq \u0259vv\u0259lki s\u00f6hb\u0259t\u0259. Pal\u00e7\u0131q yo\u011frulub haz\u0131r olan kimi at\u0131 k\u0259narla\u015fd\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131lar. At h\u0259min vaxt m\u00f6hk\u0259m silk\u0259l\u0259nirdi ki, b\u0259d\u0259nind\u0259ki sar\u0131 quru pal\u015f\u0131qlar yer\u0259 t\u00f6k\u00fcls\u00fcn. Amma quyru\u011funu dibd\u0259n n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r t\u0259rp\u0259dirdis\u0259 d\u0259 he\u00e7 c\u00fcr a\u00e7\u0131lm\u0131rd\u0131. \u00c7ayda \u00e7imdir\u0259nd\u0259 a\u00e7acaqd\u0131lar. Ustalar sar\u0131 pal\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u015fapha\u015fap divara vururdular. Bel\u0259 evl\u0259r q\u0131\u015fda isti ,yayda s\u0259rin olurdu …Da\u015f evl\u0259r s\u00f6hb\u0259tin\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 is\u0259 onu deyim ki ,k\u0259ndd\u0259 da\u015f i\u015fin\u0259 day\u0131m bax\u0131rd\u0131. Al\u0131b -satmaq yox haa. Birba\u015fa “Balatomba “deyil\u0259n \u0259razid\u0259n da\u015f\u0131 yerd\u0259n \u00f6z\u00fc \u00e7\u0131xar\u0131rd\u0131. Al\u0259tl\u0259r\u0131nin ham\u0131s\u0131 var idi -lom , k\u00fcl\u00fcng, bel …Bu balaca “da\u015f karxanas\u0131”n\u0131n m\u00fcd\u00fcri d\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcyd\u00fc, f\u0259hl\u0259si d\u0259, lap el\u0259 m\u00fch\u0259ndisi d\u0259 .Yerin alt\u0131nda hans\u0131 t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259 da\u015f\u0131n olmas\u0131n\u0131 bilm\u0259y\u0259 x\u00fcsusi cihaza ehtiyac yox idi .Day\u0131m bunlar\u0131 \u00f6z f\u0259hminn\u0259n ,z\u0259nninn\u0259n, t\u0259cr\u00fcb\u0259sinn\u0259n bilirdi . H\u0259rd\u0259n gedib da\u00e7 \u00e7\u0131xarma\u011f\u0131na h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 tama\u015fa ed\u0259rdim.K\u00fcl\u00fcng\u00fc qald\u0131r\u0131b yer\u0259 \u00e7\u0131rpanda n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 onu F\u0259rhada b\u0259nz\u0259d\u0259rdim Amma sonralar g\u00f6rd\u00fcm yox o F\u0259rhaddan da g\u00fccl\u00fcd\u00fcr \u018fvv\u0259la F\u0259rhad \u0259fsan\u0259ydi, mifiydi, u\u011frunda k\u00fcl\u00fcng \u00e7ald\u0131\u011f\u0131 Sirin d\u0259 onun kimi .Day\u0131m is\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259rimin qaba\u011f\u0131nda canl\u0131 varl\u0131\u011f\u0131yd\u0131, Bisutun da\u011f\u0131n\u0131 yarmasa da “Balatomba”da ail\u0259sin\u0259 \u00e7\u00f6r\u0259k pulu qazan\u0131rd\u0131 .F\u0259rhad \u00f6z\u00fc day\u0131m\u0131 i\u015f ba\u015f\u0131nda g\u00f6rs\u0259ydi \u0259lin\u0259 \u00f6m\u00fcr billah k\u00fcl\u00fcng almazd\u0131.B\u0259li t\u0259k adam \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn bu i\u015f \u00e7ox a\u011f\u0131r idi.Lay da\u015flar\u0131 axtar\u0131b tapmaq ,sonra onu par\u00e7alay\u0131b \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 y\u0131\u011fmaq uzund\u0259r\u0259ydi .Da\u015f\u0131n \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fc vahidi saj\u0131nla \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fc.\u0130\u015f sifari\u015fl\u0259 yerin\u0259 yetirilirdi .O vaxtlar m\u0259n bir adam\u0131n bel\u0259 day\u0131mdan incidiyini g\u00f6rm\u0259dim.K\u0259ndd\u0259 yegan\u0259 adam idi ki ,da\u015f \u00e7\u0131xard\u0131rd\u0131, h\u0259m d\u0259 bu i\u015fd\u0259n yax\u015f\u0131ca ba\u015f \u00e7\u0131xard\u0131rd\u0131. H\u0259rd\u0259n qazd\u0131\u011f\u0131 yerd\u0259n k\u00f6hn\u0259 nuh \u0259yyam\u0131ndan qalm\u0131\u015f q\u0259birl\u0259r \u00e7\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131. Q\u0259brin i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 bil\u0259rzik, k\u00fcp ,v\u0259 dig\u0259r b\u0259z\u0259kli a\u015fyalar olurdu .Day\u0131m h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 q\u0131z\u0131l qxtar\u0131rd\u0131 .Amma tarix d\u0259rsind\u0259n m\u0259nim yad\u0131mda qalm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ki, bel\u0259 \u0259\u015fyalar tunc d\u00f6vr\u00fcn\u0259 aiddir. Q\u0131z\u0131ldan s\u00f6hb\u0259t ged\u0259 bilm\u0259z. Tarix-marix h\u0259rl\u0259mirdi .B\u0259xtini s\u00f6y\u0259- s\u00f6y\u0259 k\u00fcpl\u0259ri bir- bir s\u0131nd\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131 .\u0130llahda ki, araq i\u00e7\u0259nd\u0259 q\u0259birl\u0259r\u0259 qan uddururdu, yerl\u0259 yeksan edirdi.\u0130st\u0259yirdim i\u00e7i bo\u015f k\u00fcp\u00fcn birini \u00f6z\u00fcml\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u0259m ,day\u0131m\u0131n i\u015find\u0259n yadigar saxlayam ,qoymurdu,- i\u00e7ind\u0259 q\u0131z\u0131l olmayan k\u00fcp\u00fc neynirs\u0259n a bajo\u011flu ,bir az o t\u0259r\u0259f\u0259 dur k\u00fcl\u00fcng s\u0259n\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259r,- deyib q\u0259birl\u0259rd\u0259n olmaz\u0131n heyifini al\u0131rd\u0131 .Bu bo\u015f k\u00fcp\u0259li ,tunc bil\u0259rzikli q\u0259bird\u0259 uyuyan b\u0259db\u0259xtl\u0259r ,\u00fc\u00e7 min ild\u0259n sonra hans\u0131sa bir da\u015f \u00e7\u0131xardan day\u0131n\u0131n onlar\u0131n q\u0259birl\u0259rini k\u00fcl\u00fcngl\u0259 it g\u00fcn\u00fcn\u0259 qoyaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bils\u0259ydil\u0259r,- meyitl\u0259rini yand\u0131r\u0131b k\u00fcll\u0259rini g\u00f6y\u0259 sovurmalar\u0131n\u0131 \u0259zizl\u0259rin\u0259 d\u00f6n\u0259- d\u00f6n\u0259 v\u0259siyy\u0259t ed\u0259rdil\u0259r. Bir \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259 m\u0259\u015fhur “Ekstra” ara\u011f\u0131n\u0131 t\u0259k ba\u015f\u0131na i\u00e7\u0259n day\u0131m – i\u00e7\u0259risind\u0259 i\u00e7i bo\u015f k\u00fcp\u0259si, bir ovuc \u00e7\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fc\u015f s\u00fcm\u00fcy\u00fc ,be\u015f alt\u0131 tunc bil\u0259rziyi, sap\u0131 q\u0131r\u0131q x\u0259nc\u0259ri olan bu anas\u0131 \u00f6lm\u00fc\u015fl\u0259rin q\u0259brirl\u0259rinin k\u00fcl\u00fcn\u00fc s\u00f6z\u00fcn \u0259sl m\u0259nas\u0131nda g\u00f6y\u0259 sovururdu .Day\u0131m d\u00f6vr zad anlam\u0131rd\u0131 .El\u0259 hey q\u0131z\u0131l deyib, q\u0131z\u0131l e\u015fidirdi.V\u0259 beyni o q\u0259d\u0259r dumanlanm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ki ,o dumanda g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 h\u0259r \u015fey q\u0131z\u0131l g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc .H\u0259min g\u00fcn m\u0259n d\u0259 ondan \u00f6t\u0259ri q\u0131z\u0131l o\u011flan idim .-Soru\u015furdum, b\u0259s ay day\u0131 o k\u00fcpl\u0259ri q\u0259br\u0259 niy\u0259 qoyublar g\u00f6r\u0259s\u0259n?- El\u0259 bil yaras\u0131na duz bas\u0131rd\u0131n ,-canlar\u0131na azara-\u00e7ora qoyublar a baj\u0131o\u011flu ,n\u0259 bilim ,m\u0259n d\u0259 s\u0259nin kimi, -deyib \u0259m\u0259lli- ba\u015fl\u0131 \u0259s\u0259bl\u0259\u015firdi. Arxas\u0131nca da bu q\u0131z\u0131ls\u0131z, zin\u0259tsiz ,kas\u0131b q\u0259brd\u0259 d\u0259fn olunanlar\u0131n yeddi arxa d\u00f6n\u0259ninin ruhlar\u0131n\u0131 ya\u011fl\u0131 -ya\u011fl\u0131 s\u00f6y\u00fc\u015fl\u0259rl\u0259 yad edirdi. Ax\u0131rda sustal\u0131b yorulurdu ,\u0259ld\u0259n d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrd\u00fc ,k\u00fcl\u00fcng\u00fc yer\u0259 at\u0131rd\u0131,- y\u0259qin bura basd\u0131r\u0131lanlar m\u0259nim kimi kas\u0131b -kusublard\u0131,- deyib ,\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 t\u0259s\u0259lli verirdi v\u0259 “Avrora” siqaretind\u0259n d\u0259rin q\u00fcllab vura -vura o biri \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259ni “zakuska”s\u0131z zads\u0131z ba\u015f\u0131na \u00e7\u0259kirdi .El\u0259 bil bulaq suyu i\u00e7irdi. Bu \u00fc\u00e7 min illik “b\u0259r\u0259k\u0259tsiz” v\u0259 b\u0259db\u0259xt q\u0259birl\u0259r day\u0131m\u0131 \u00e7ox dilxor edirdi .Q\u0131z\u0131l axtara -axtara q\u0131z\u0131l kimi vaxt\u0131n\u0131 bo\u015f yer\u0259 itirirdi .Da\u015fdan qazand\u0131\u011f\u0131 pulun \u00e7ox hiss\u0259sini beyni dumanland\u0131ran ,niyy\u0259ti g\u00fcmanland\u0131ran m\u0259\u015fhur”Ekstra” ara\u011f\u0131na x\u0259rcl\u0259yirdi.Sifari\u015fl\u0259r y\u0131\u011f\u0131l\u0131b qal\u0131rd\u0131 ,\u0259li -qolu i\u015fd\u0259n soyuyurdu.-Bajo\u011flu get bir d\u0259n\u0259 d\u0259 aqa\u011f al , ciy\u0259rim yan\u0131r ,-deyirdi.Amma bu ara\u011f\u0131n ona xoruz s\u0259si e\u015fitm\u0259y\u0259n ,d\u00fcrl\u00fc-d\u00fcrl\u00fc s\u00f6y\u00fc\u015fl\u0259ri xat\u0131rlatmaqdan v\u0259 bu xat\u0131rlanan s\u00f6y\u00fc\u015fl\u0259ri u\u00e7 min illik b\u0259db\u0259xt ,talesiz q\u0259birl\u0259rin \u00fcnvan\u0131na s\u00f6yd\u00fcrm\u0259kd\u0259n ba\u015fqa day\u0131ma he\u00e7 bir xeyri yoxuydu. Yan\u0131nda bir x\u0259nd\u0259k vard\u0131 i\u00e7i dolu bo\u015f araq \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259l\u0259ri . El\u0259 bu \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n bir saray tikm\u0259k olard\u0131 …
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\n….Evimiz \u0259n g\u00f6z\u0259l yerd\u0259 g\u00fcneyd\u0259 yerl\u0259\u015fir .Buradan b\u00fct\u00fcn k\u0259nd ovcumun i\u00e7i kimi g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr.\u018fn g\u00f6z\u0259l \u0259z\u0259m\u0259tli g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u0259n is\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131 qarl\u0131 da\u011flard\u0131r.G\u00fcn\u0259\u015f da\u011flar\u0131n arxas\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131\u011f\u0131 kimi d\u0259 yenid\u0259n da\u011flar\u0131n arxas\u0131nda bat\u0131r.\u00c7ox zaman m\u0259kt\u0259bin vaxt\u0131n\u0131 saata yox, da\u011flar\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131 \u00fcst\u0259 nazlanan g\u00fcn\u0259\u015f\u0259 bax\u0131b m\u00fc\u0259yy\u0259n ed\u0259 bilirdim.M\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lirdi ki g\u00fcn\u0259\u015f da\u011flara ke\u015fik \u00e7\u0259kir ,\u0259z\u0259m\u0259tin\u0259 i\u015f\u0131q sal\u0131r.B\u0259li g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fli g\u00fcnl\u0259rd\u0259 da\u011flar daha g\u00f6z\u0259l g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc s\u0259ssiz ,s\u0259mirsiz adam\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fc.Ona g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fi daha tez-tez arzulay\u0131rd\u0131m .Baxmayaraq ki havalar \u00e7ox vaxt \u00e7iskinli – dumanl\u0131 ,buludlu ke\u00e7irdi .Bel\u0259 havalarda basarat\u0131 ba\u011flanan adamlar kimi dar\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131m ,buluda \u015fim\u015f\u0259y\u0259 ,ya\u011f\u0131\u015fa ,dumana, g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fin d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259ni kimi bax\u0131rd\u0131m.B\u0259z\u0259n h\u0259ft\u0259l\u0259rn\u0259n onlar g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fin qaba\u011f\u0131n\u0131 tuturdular ,da\u011flar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcnm\u0259z edirdil\u0259r.K\u0259ndimizi da\u011flars\u0131z t\u0259s\u0259vv\u00fcr ed\u0259 bilmirdim. Onsuz d\u00fcnyan\u0131n \u0259n q\u0259rib adam\u0131na d\u00f6n\u00fcrd\u00fcm.
\nG\u00fcn\u0259\u015f\u0259 t\u0259r\u0259fke\u015flik el\u0259m\u0259yim\u0259 baxmayaraq k\u0259ndimizin f\u0259sill\u0259rinin ham\u0131s\u0131 g\u00f6z ox\u015fay\u0131rd\u0131 .Yazda eyvandan baxanda b\u00fct\u00fcn k\u0259nd a\u011fappaq g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc.\u00c7i\u00e7\u0259k a\u00e7mayan bir g\u00fcl, bir a\u011fac tapa bilm\u0259zdin.B\u0259y\u0259nm\u0259diyimiz qanqal\u0131n da \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259m\u0259xsus g\u00fcll\u0259ri olurdu.A\u011fappaq k\u0259nd\u0259 baxmaqdan adam doymurdu. Bu qeyri -adi g\u00f6z\u0259llik b\u00fct\u00fcn probleml\u0259ri arxada qoyurdu .Adam\u0131n ruhu dinc\u0259lird\u0131. \u00c7i\u00e7\u0259kl\u0259r\u0259 qonan ar\u0131lar\u0131n v\u0131zilt\u0131s\u0131nda bir q\u0259l\u0259b\u0259lik vard\u0131 ,yaradana minn\u0259tdarl\u0131q vard\u0131 .Ar\u0131lar\u0131n \u015fir\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kdikl\u0259ri ,g\u00fcll\u0259ri diqq\u0259tl\u0259 izl\u0259y\u0259rdim .Sonra \u00f6z\u00fcm o g\u00fcll\u0259ri qopar\u0131b \u015fir\u0259sini dadard\u0131m. Ad\u0131na” Sormux g\u00fcl\u00fc” dey\u0259rdil\u0259r.Ar\u0131lar\u0131n ilk d\u0259f\u0259 m\u0259ni sancmas\u0131n\u0131n s\u0259b\u0259bi y\u0259qin ki el\u0259 bu \u015fir\u0259 m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259siydi .O g\u00fcl\u00fc d\u0259rm\u0259yim d\u0259 birinci v\u0259 sonuncu oldu .Ar\u0131lar\u0131n intiqam\u0131 n\u0259 yaman olurmu\u015f. \u0130yn\u0259nin a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131 xeyli vaxt qolumnan getm\u0259di .Qaranqu\u015flar eyvan\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n ne\u00e7\u0259 yerind\u0259 \u00f6zl\u0259rin\u0259 yuva qurard\u0131lar .Pal\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131 dimdikl\u0259rind\u0259 da\u015f\u0131malar\u0131na maraqla baxard\u0131m .Sonra h\u0259min yuvada balalar\u0131na yem g\u0259tirdikl\u0259rini izl\u0259y\u0259rdim.Onu da bilirdim ki bu yuvalar\u0131 u\u00e7urmaq olmazd\u0131. \u018fsrar\u0259ngiz g\u00f6z\u0259lliyi il\u0259 nsanlarda ruh y\u00fcks\u0259kliyi, ya\u015famaq e\u015fqi yaradan yaz\u0131n g\u0259lm\u0259si m\u00fcnasibati il\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m\u0259 qo\u015fulub Tanr\u0131ya dua el\u0259yirdim ,dediyi s\u00f6zl\u0259ri t\u0259krarlay\u0131rd\u0131m .Sidqi \u00fcr\u0259kd\u0259n oxunan bu dualar\u0131n m\u00fcst\u0259c\u0259b olmas\u0131na he\u00e7 bir \u015f\u00fcbh\u0259m yox idi.
\nBir may d\u00fcnya z\u0259hm\u0259tke\u015fl\u0259rinin bayram\u0131n\u0131 b\u00f6y\u00fck h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 ke\u00e7ir\u0259rdik D\u00fczd\u00fc, k\u0259ndd\u0259 parad- marad yoxuydu .He\u00e7 ura q\u0131\u015fq\u0131ran da tapa bilm\u0259zdin .Ad\u0131na mayovka dediyimiz bu bayram g\u00fcn\u00fcnd\u0259 insanlarda, x\u00fcsus\u0259n u\u015faqlarda bir \u00e7anf\u0259\u015fanl\u0131q vard\u0131 ki, g\u0259l g\u00f6r\u0259s\u0259n.\u00dc\u00e7 -d\u00f6rd n\u0259f\u0259r bir yer\u0259 y\u0131\u011f\u0131l\u0131b pul at\u0131\u015fard\u0131q .O pula kilki konservas\u0131 ,pe\u00e7enye ,konfet v\u0259 bir \u015f\u00fc\u015f\u0259 “Al\u015f\u0259rab” \u00e7ax\u0131r\u0131 alard\u0131q. Evd\u0259n d\u0259 Allah ver\u0259nd\u0259n \u015fordan yumurtadan g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u0259rdik .G\u00fcn\u0259\u015fli da\u011f\u0131n \u0259t\u0259yind\u0259 oturub, k\u0259nd caamat\u0131n\u0131 da ora qat\u0131b d\u00fcnya z\u0259hm\u0259tke\u015fl\u0259rinin sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131na yeyib i\u00e7\u0259rdik. \u00c7ox ke\u00e7m\u0259zdi beynimiz dumanlanard\u0131 .Da\u011flar\u0131n duman\u0131 ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131zdak\u0131 dumana h\u0259s\u0259d aparard\u0131 .\u015e\u0259nliyimiz bir -iki saat c\u0259k\u0259rdi.Bibio\u011flu deyirdi ki, getm\u0259y\u0259 t\u0259l\u0259sm\u0259 qoy \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcn q\u0131zart\u0131s\u0131 \u00e7\u0259kilsin, a\u011fz\u0131ndan \u00e7ax\u0131r\u0131n qoxusu getsin.Babam bils\u0259 ki z\u0259hm\u0259tke\u015fl\u0259rin sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131na \u00e7ax\u0131r i\u00e7mi\u015fik, z\u0259hm\u0259tke\u015fl\u0259ri d\u0259 bizi d\u0259 s\u00f6y\u00fcb sulayacaq.Babam\u0131n xasiyy\u0259tini m\u0259n d\u0259 bildiyimn\u0259n \u018flini \u00e7ox yax\u015f\u0131 ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrd\u00fcm.Da\u011f\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 enib yastana deyil\u0259n d\u00fcz\u0259ngahda bir az futbol oynad\u0131q .Yorulduq.Daha ged\u0259k b\u0259sdir, evd\u0259 nigaran qalarlar ,h\u0259m d\u0259 g\u00f6y\u00fcn \u00fcz\u00fc tutulub, bir azdan ya\u011f\u0131\u015f yagacaq- dey\u0259 \u018fli bir may bayram\u0131n\u0131 ba\u011fl\u0131 elan el\u0259di. \u00dcz\u00fcm\u0259 baxd\u0131,-\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcn q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131s\u0131 qal\u0131b,ehtiyatl\u0131 ol babam bilm\u0259sin ,yoxsa… Bilir\u0259m ,ev\u0259 \u00e7atana q\u0259d\u0259r tam ke\u00e7ib ged\u0259r,-dedim.Amma ke\u00e7m\u0259di .Ev\u0259 \u00e7atan kimi babam m\u0259ni diqq\u0259tl\u0259 s\u00fczd\u00fc ,o saat da ,-\u018fliy\u0259 qo\u015fulub \u00e7ax\u0131r i\u00e7mis\u0259n – deyib s\u0259sini qald\u0131rd\u0131 ,b\u0259rk \u0259s\u0259bl\u0259\u015fdi.\u00dcz\u00fcm bir az da q\u0131zard\u0131, od tutub yand\u0131 ,\u00e7ax\u0131r\u0131n q\u0131zart\u0131s\u0131 toya getm\u0259li oldu. X\u0259cal\u0259tin q\u0131zart\u0131s\u0131 \u015f\u0259rab\u0131n q\u0131zart\u0131s\u0131na qar\u0131\u015f\u0131b \u00fcz\u00fcmd\u0259 q\u0259rib\u0259 xo\u015fag\u0259lm\u0259z r\u0259ng yaratd\u0131lar. M\u0259n \u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fc g\u00f6rm\u0259s\u0259m d\u0259, bu r\u0259ngi y\u00fcz faiz hiss el\u0259yirdim .\u00c7\u00fcnki m\u0259nim sif\u0259tim d\u0259yi\u015fib o v\u0259ziyy\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259nd\u0259, el\u0259 bil babam\u0131n da ac\u0131ql\u0131 sif\u0259ti bir az m\u00fclayiml\u0259\u015fdi ,yum\u015fald\u0131 .Hiss el\u0259dim ki ,qorxma\u011f\u0131m v\u0259 q\u0259rib u\u015faq olma\u011f\u0131m qan\u0131m\u0131n aras\u0131na girib. Qorxudan ,x\u0259cal\u0259td\u0259n r\u0259ngi ruhu qa\u00e7an ,\u0259cayib g\u00f6rk\u0259m alan bu xo\u015fa g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259n \u00fcz\u00fcmn\u0259n babam\u0131n g\u00f6z\u00fc su i\u00e7m\u0259di .N\u0259n\u0259min d\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 qahmar \u00e7\u0131xmas\u0131 onun \u00e7\u0131rmalanm\u0131\u015f \u0259lini -qolunu tamam soyutdu.L\u0259n\u0259t \u015feytana dedi. -B\u0259 s\u0259n\u0259 demi\u015f\u0259m ax\u0131 ,-\u018fliy\u0259 qo\u015fulma,onnan az otur dur ,b\u0259 bel\u0259 olarm\u0131 adam da \u00e7ax\u0131r i\u00e7\u0259rmi ,m\u0259kt\u0259blis\u0259n ax\u0131 s\u0259n ,-dedi v\u0259 astadan da olsa d\u00fcnya z\u0259hm\u0259tke\u015fl\u0259rini v\u0259 bu bayram\u0131 icad el\u0259y\u0259nin \u00fcnvan\u0131na indiy\u0259d\u0259k e\u015fitm\u0259diyim ya\u011fl\u0131 s\u00f6y\u00fc\u015fl\u0259r s\u00f6yd\u00fc.Q\u0259rib\u0259ydi ki , xo\u015fag\u0259lm\u0259z q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 r\u0259ng bir m\u00fcdd\u0259t \u00fcz\u00fcmn\u0259n getm\u0259di .O s\u0259b\u0259bd\u0259n d\u0259 xeyli vaxt g\u00fczg\u00fcy\u0259 baxmaqdan z\u0259hl\u0259m getdi.X\u0259cal\u0259tin r\u0259ngi n\u0259 pis olurmu\u015f…<\/p>\n

Yavanl\u0131q dig\u0259r \u0259rzaq bax\u0131m\u0131ndan o q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259 \u00e7\u0259tinlik \u00e7\u0259kmirdik . Babam\u0131n v\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259min ald\u0131qlar\u0131 t\u0259qa\u00fcd h\u0259m d\u0259 kartofdan g\u0259l\u0259n g\u0259lir dolan\u0131\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131za b\u0259s el\u0259yirdi Mal qoyun \u0259tind\u0259n \u00e7ox t\u0259sad\u00fcfi hallarda istifad\u0259 edirdik .Bir d\u0259 e\u015fidirdin ki ,k\u0259nd adam\u0131n\u0131n biri \u00f6z danas\u0131n\u0131 k\u0259sm\u0259y\u0259 haz\u0131rla\u015f\u0131r .Bu zaman bir n\u0259f\u0259r qap\u0131 -qap\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb siyah\u0131 tuturdu ki ,g\u00f6r\u0259k kim ne\u00e7\u0259 kilo \u0259t alacaq.Buna al\u0131\u015fma deyirdil\u0259r.V\u0259 bu al\u0131\u015fmaya qat\u0131lanlar aras\u0131da babam\u0131n da ad\u0131 olurdu.N\u0259n\u0259m \u015fil\u0259 bi\u015fir\u0259rdi .\u00c7al\u0131\u015fard\u0131 ki ,\u0259tin \u00e7oxunu m\u0259n yeyim. Bilmir\u0259m gec- gec yem\u0259kd\u0259ndi , ya n\u0259d\u0259ndis\u0259 bu dana \u0259ti n\u0259 x\u0259ng\u0259lin n\u0259 penc\u0259rin n\u0259 d\u0259 yarp\u0131zl\u0131 dov\u011fan\u0131n yerini vermirdi.H\u0259tta \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259n k\u0259nd\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259n qonaqlar da toyuq c\u00fcc\u0259, heyvan k\u0259sm\u0259y\u0259 qoymazd\u0131lar .\u015e\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 \u0259t yeyirik deyib, -k\u0259nd x\u00f6r\u0259kl\u0259rin\u0259 \u00fcst\u00fcnl\u00fck ver\u0259rdil\u0259r. Qat\u0131\u011fa s\u00fcd\u0259 lap el\u0259 Allah\u0131n quru \u015foruna daha \u00e7ox meyl ed\u0259rdil\u0259r .Amma qona\u011f\u0131n qaba\u011f\u0131na quru \u015for qoymaq ev sahibin\u0259 ar g\u0259lirdi .\u018fn az\u0131ndan bir xoruz k\u0259sm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131lar. Amma el\u0259leri d\u0259 vard\u0131 ki …Qohumlardan biri Bak\u0131dan qonaq g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 o\u011fluna i\u015far\u0259 el\u0259yirdi ki, \u0259min g\u0259lib ,qa\u00e7 q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 xoruzu tut k\u0259s\u0259k. \u018fvv\u0259ll\u0259r u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 ba\u015fa salm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ki ev\u0259 qonaq g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 s\u0259ni xoruzu tutma\u011fa g\u00f6nd\u0259r\u0259c\u0259m .Amma n\u0259 bad\u0259 tutasan, yalandan xoruzun dal\u0131nca qa\u00e7, m\u0259hl\u0259ni \u00fc\u00e7 -d\u00f6rd d\u0259f\u0259 “kruq”vur,guya tuta bilmirs\u0259n. Ona kimi qonaq \u015fordan qat\u0131qdan yeyib qarn\u0131n\u0131 doyduracaq .Sonra qurudlu x\u0259ng\u0259ll\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 qatar\u0131q Bir g\u00fcn yen\u0259 Bak\u0131dan g\u0259l\u0259n var idi. Ev yiy\u0259si xo\u015f -be\u015fd\u0259n sonra ad\u0259ti \u00fczr\u0259 balaca o\u011fluna i\u015far\u0259 el\u0259di ki, b\u0259s qa\u00e7 q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 xoruzu tut k\u0259s\u0259k , \u0259min yesin. K\u0259nd xoruzunun dad\u0131 bir ayr\u0131d\u0131 .U\u015faq \u00f6z i\u015fini bilirdi ,atas\u0131n\u0131n n\u0259 dediyini g\u00f6yd\u0259 tuturdu .Bu d\u0259f\u0259 h\u0259y\u0259t\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xan kimi xoruzu qap\u0131n\u0131n a\u011fz\u0131nda g\u00f6rd\u00fc. El\u0259 bil xoruz da qona\u011f\u0131 g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc ,v\u0259 n\u00f6vb\u0259ti \u015founu \u00e7\u0131xartmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn o\u011flana qo\u015fulma\u011f\u0131n vaxt\u0131 idi .Xoruz qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131, o\u011flan qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131 .Amma bildiyiniz kimi tutmaq s\u00f6hb\u0259ti yox idi .Tutsa qonaq ged\u0259nn\u0259n sanra atas\u0131n\u0131n ya\u011fl\u0131 k\u00f6t\u0259kl\u0259rin\u0259 m\u0259ruz qalacaqd\u0131, t\u0259hqir olunacaqd\u0131 .S\u00f6z\u0259 baxmayan f\u0259rsiz o\u011ful dam\u011fas\u0131 alacaqd\u0131 .Ev sahibi qona\u011fa, -qat\u0131qnan ,\u015fornan \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc doydurma \u00f6\u011flum q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 xoruzu tutma\u011fa getdi ,s\u0259nin qism\u0259tindi ,b\u0259s onu kim yey\u0259c\u0259k ,-dey\u0259 qonaqp\u0259rv\u0259rlik n\u00fcmayi\u015f etdirirdi .Zavall\u0131 qonaq d\u00f6n\u0259- d\u00f6n\u0259 xahi\u015f edirdi ki ,b\u0259s u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 yormay\u0131n. Bu \u015for , qat\u0131q ,t\u0259miz hava n\u0259y\u0259 des\u0259niz d\u0259y\u0259r. \u015e\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 bunlar\u0131n h\u0259sr\u0259tini \u00e7\u0259kirik. Siz Allah \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131n u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 g\u0259lsin .Yoxsa yediyim m\u0259n\u0259 nu\u015f olmaz .Qona\u011f\u0131n bel\u0259 yerli -yataql\u0131 dediyi bu t\u0259m -t\u0259raql\u0131 s\u00f6zl\u0259r ev yiy\u0259sinin can\u0131na ya\u011f kimi yay\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131 .Az qal\u0131rd\u0131 qona\u011f\u0131 ba\u011fr\u0131na bass\u0131n, onula t\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n \u0259m\u0259lli -ba\u015fl\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fs\u00fcn,sizin kimi insan az-azd\u0131 desin . Amma \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc saxlay\u0131rd\u0131. H\u0259m d\u0259 \u015fit al\u0131nard\u0131 .Qonaq da \u015f\u00fcbh\u0259l\u0259n\u0259rdi ki g\u00f6r\u0259s\u0259n bunun ba\u015f\u0131na at t\u0259pib n\u0259di ,-adamnan ne\u00e7\u0259 d\u0259f\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u0259rl\u0259r -Ev sahibi bu gic -gici x\u0259yallardan tez ayr\u0131ld\u0131 v\u0259 bic -bic g\u00fcl\u0259 -g\u00fcl\u0259 ,-yax\u015f\u0131 ay q\u0131z \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 ev\u0259 g\u0259lsin, \u0259misi b\u0131r d\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 tutub k\u0259s\u0259rik, -dedi .U\u015faq qan- t\u0259rin i\u00e7ind\u0259 olard\u0131 .\u0130\u015finin bitdiyini anlay\u0131b qalib \u0259sg\u0259r kimi \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc ev\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131rard\u0131.Q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 xoruz bir az da q\u0131zarard\u0131,dili dimdiyind\u0259n sallanard\u0131, it kimi l\u0259hliy\u0259rdi ,pipikl\u0259rind\u0259n od t\u00f6k\u00fcl\u0259rdi.H\u0259r qonaq g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 bu q\u0259d\u0259r bo\u015f -bo\u015funa qa\u00e7maqdansa bir d\u0259f\u0259lik tutulub k\u0259silm\u0259k ona daha s\u0259rf\u0259liydi. Amma bu \u015fou bitmirdi ki, bitmirdi. T\u0259z\u0259 qonaq g\u0259l\u0259n kimi ev sahibi t\u0259r\u0259find\u0259n xoruzun marafon qa\u00e7\u0131\u015f\u0131na start verilirdi .A\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131 balaca o\u011flan da bu oyundan bezmi\u015fdi Xoruz qovmaqdan z\u0259hl\u0259si gedirdi .Bu qa\u00e7ma\u011f\u0131n\u0131 u\u015faqlarla oyuna ,futbola s\u0259rf el\u0259s\u0259ydi daha s\u0259m\u0259r\u0259li olard\u0131.Amma b\u00f6y\u00fcy\u00fcn s\u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n d\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xa bilmirdi. N\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r olmasa atas\u0131 idi.\u018flb\u0259tt\u0259 bu f\u0259rdi epizodu qonaqp\u0259rv\u0259r bir k\u0259ndin aya\u011f\u0131na yazmaq g\u00fcnah olard\u0131…
\nXoruz s\u00f6hb\u0259ti salm\u0131\u015fk\u0259n onu da deyim ki,toyuq k\u0259sm\u0259y\u0259 he\u00e7 \u00fcr\u0259yim g\u0259lm\u0259zdi.Apar\u0131b qon\u015fuya k\u0259sdir\u0259rdim .K\u0259silnd\u0259 d\u0259 toyu\u011fun \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxa bilmirdim .N\u0259n\u0259m deyirdi ki ,\u00f6yr\u0259n \u00f6z\u00fcn k\u0259s ,bir toyuqdan \u00f6t\u0259ri n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r onun ,bunun qap\u0131s\u0131na ged\u0259c\u0259ks\u0259n .Amma \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc n\u0259 qd\u0259r toplasam da \u0259lim g\u0259lmirdi .Toyu\u011fa yaz\u0131\u011f\u0131m g\u0259lirdi. \u0130llah da ki, qon\u015fu balta il\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 bir g\u00f6z q\u0131rp\u0131m\u0131nda \u00fcz\u0259nd\u0259 baxa bilmirdim. Ba\u015fs\u0131z toyuq h\u0259l\u0259 diri idi v\u0259 \u0259limn\u0259n \u00e7\u0131x\u0131b ba\u015f\u0131 \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259ymi\u015f kimi qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131 . Dey\u0259rdim ki, ba\u015f\u0131 \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 oldu\u011fundan da yax\u015f\u0131 qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131 .\u018fvv\u0259l qorxurdum .Yaz\u0131\u011f\u0131m g\u0259lirdi.Sonra \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc toplay\u0131b c\u0259ld qa\u00e7\u0131b tuturdum .Quca\u011f\u0131mda el\u0259 \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131n\u0131rd\u0131 ki, dey\u0259rdin y\u00f6n\u00fc \u00f6lm\u0259y\u0259 yox ,dirilm\u0259y\u0259 t\u0259r\u0259fdi , ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 axtar\u0131r .M\u0259n bunlar\u0131 u\u015faq mara\u011f\u0131mla n\u0259n\u0259m\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131m .N\u0259n\u0259m ba\u015fa sal\u0131rd\u0131 ki , toyu\u011fu k\u0259s\u0259nd\u0259 g\u0259r\u0259k \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc qibl\u0259y\u0259 tutasan, bismillah dey\u0259s\u0259n ,baltayla yox b\u0131\u00e7aqla k\u0259s\u0259s\u0259n.\u00c7\u0131rp\u0131nma\u011fa qoymayasan ki, qan\u0131 rahat axs\u0131n. Yoxsa g\u00fcnah say\u0131l\u0131r …
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\nT\u0259k birc\u0259 d\u0259f\u0259 u\u015faqlar m\u0259ni alma o\u011furlu\u011funa getm\u0259y\u0259 m\u0259cbur el\u0259dil\u0259r Etiraz etdim amma m\u00fcmk\u00fcn olmad\u0131 .Dedil\u0259r ki qorxma s\u0259n aral\u0131da dayan\u0131b pusarsan ,adam zad g\u00f6r\u00fcb el\u0259s\u0259n tez biz\u0259 x\u0259b\u0259r ed\u0259rs\u0259n.Ayaqlar\u0131m g\u00fccl\u0259 gedirdi.\u0130ri q\u0131pq\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 almalar\u0131 saxlama\u011fa g\u00fcc\u00fc \u00e7atmayan budaqlar yer\u0259 d\u0259yirdi.Ona g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 \u00e7ox asan y\u0131\u011fmaq olurdu Bu alma \u0259m\u0259liyyat\u0131nda tutulmad\u0131q ,he\u00e7 kim bizi g\u00f6rm\u0259di.Amma n\u0259n\u0259md\u0259n e\u015fitmi\u015fdim ki ,Allah h\u0259r \u015feyi g\u00f6r\u00fcr.Bel\u0259 olan halda Allah\u0131n bizi d\u0259 g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcn\u0259 \u015f\u00fcbh\u0259m qalmad\u0131.\u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc o ki var danlad\u0131m.\u0130ndinin \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 d\u0259 bu h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259timd\u0259n x\u0259cal\u0259t \u00e7\u0259kir\u0259m.O almalar\u0131 u\u015faqlaq nec\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 b\u0259h -b\u0259hl\u0259 yeyirdil\u0259r.M\u0259n h\u0259v\u0259ssiz yeyirdim ,bo\u011fulurdum. A\u011fz\u0131mda xo\u015fa g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259n dad \u0259m\u0259l\u0259 g\u0259lirdi. Yeti\u015fmi\u015f , q\u0131pq\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 ,\u015fip\u015firin alman\u0131n ac\u0131 z\u0259h\u0259r kimi dadmas\u0131 q\u0259rib\u0259 idi .Bu haram\u0131n dad\u0131 idi …
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\nYa\u011f\u0131\u015f ya\u011fanda k\u0259silm\u0259k bilmirdi .\u015eim\u015f\u0259k el\u0259 g\u00fccl\u00fc \u015faqq\u0131lday\u0131b \u00e7ax\u0131rd\u0131 ki ,dey\u0259rdin indi da\u011f\u0131 yar\u0131 b\u00f6l\u0259c\u0259k.S\u0259sind\u0259n qulaq tutulurdu.Leysan k\u0259ndi \u0259m\u0259lli ba\u015fl\u0131 yuyurdu.D\u0259r\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n axan sel m\u0259cras\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131.\u018flin\u0259 ke\u00e7\u0259ni \u00f6z\u00fcyl\u0259 apar\u0131rd\u0131.N\u0259n\u0259m \u0259ll\u0259rini g\u00f6y\u0259 uzad\u0131b Allaha dua el\u0259yirdi ki ya\u011f\u0131\u015f \u00e7ox f\u0259sad yaratmas\u0131n.Bo\u015f qablar\u0131 ya\u011f\u0131\u015f\u0131n alt\u0131na d\u00fcz\u0259rdik.N\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259ni h\u0259min su il\u0259 \u00e7imdir\u0259rdi. Buludlar bo\u015falanda k\u0259ndd\u0259 q\u0259rib\u0259 bir sakitlik \u00e7\u00f6k\u0259rdi.Az sonra bir canlanma \u0259m\u0259l\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259rdi .Bel\u0259 \u015f\u0259raitd\u0259 yolda yerim\u0259k h\u0259r o\u011fulun i\u015fi deyildi .S\u00f6z\u00fcn \u0259sl m\u0259nas\u0131nda pal\u00e7\u0131q diz\u0259 \u00e7ixird\u0131.\u00c7\u0259km\u0259 ,qalo\u015f t\u0259mizl\u0259m\u0259kd\u0259n bezirdik H\u0259r evin gir\u0259c\u0259yind\u0259 k\u00f6t\u00fcy\u0259 b\u0259rkidilmi\u015f d\u0259mird\u0259n ayaqqab\u0131 t\u0259mizl\u0259y\u0259n var idi.Ona g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 k\u0259ndd\u0259 ya\u011f\u0131\u015f arzulayan\u0131 \u00e7\u0259tin tapard\u0131n.
\nK\u0259ndimizin q\u0131\u015f f\u0259slinin bir ayr\u0131 g\u00f6z\u0259lliyi var idi .Yazda a\u011fappaq \u00e7i\u00e7\u0259y\u0259 b\u00fcr\u00fcn\u0259n k\u0259nd q\u0131\u015fda a\u011fappaq qara b\u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc.G\u00fcn\u0259\u015fin \u015f\u00fcas\u0131 qar\u0131n \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 maraql\u0131 par\u0131lt\u0131 \u0259m\u0259l\u0259 g\u0259tirirdi v\u0259 adam\u0131n g\u00f6zl\u0259rini qama\u015fd\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131 G\u00fcn\u00fcn i\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131nda sayr\u0131\u015fan parlaq qar d\u0259n\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259 baxmaqdan xo\u015fum g\u0259lirdi .Sanki qar \u00fc\u015f\u00fcm\u0259sin dey\u0259 g\u00fcn onu isitm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131 .\u0130sitdikc\u0259 d\u0259 qar yava\u015f- yava\u015f \u0259riyirdi ,azal\u0131rd\u0131 .G\u00fcn\u00fcn bel\u0259 “s\u0259xav\u0259ti “\u0259lb\u0259tt\u0259 biz u\u015faqlar\u0131n xo\u015funa g\u0259lm\u0259zdi.\u00c7\u00fcnki q\u0131\u015f mac\u0259ralar\u0131m\u0131z \u0259sas\u0259n qarla ba\u011fl\u0131yd\u0131 .Buz ba\u011flam\u0131\u015f yolda s\u00fcr\u00fc\u015fm\u0259yin \u00f6z l\u0259zz\u0259ti var idi.Xiz\u0259kl\u0259 s\u00fcr\u00fc\u015f\u0259n kim, y\u0131x\u0131lan kim, duran kim,y\u0131x\u0131lana g\u00fcl\u0259n kim… \u018fn \u00e7ox ayaq \u00fcst\u0259 \u00e7\u0259km\u0259 il\u0259 s\u00fcr\u00fc\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 \u00fcst\u00fcnl\u00fck verilirdi. Bu da m\u0259nim xo\u015fuma g\u0259lirdi .\u00c7\u0259km\u0259l\u0259rim t\u0259z\u0259ydi, bu s\u0259b\u0259bd\u0259n d\u0259 pis s\u00fcr\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrd\u00fc, dilxor olurdum.\u0130\u015f o yer\u0259 \u00e7atdi ki,yax\u015f\u0131 s\u00fcr\u00fc\u015fs\u00fcn dey\u0259 b\u0131\u00e7a\u011f\u0131 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb x\u0259lv\u0259tc\u0259 \u00e7\u0259km\u0259nin alt\u0131ndak\u0131 rezin x\u0259tl\u0259ri k\u0259sib do\u011frad\u0131m.Bunu u\u015faqlardan kims\u0259 bildi v\u0259 babama x\u0259b\u0259r verdi.H\u0259min \u00e7\u0259km\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 m\u0259kt\u0259bin yan\u0131ndak\u0131 s\u00fcr\u00fc\u015fk\u0259nlikd\u0259n yox evd\u0259n s\u00fcr\u00fc\u015f\u0259si oldum.-S\u00fcr\u00fc\u015f burdan – babam\u0131n h\u00f6kml\u00fc s\u0259si o ilki q\u0131\u015f\u0131 m\u0259nim burnumnan g\u0259tirdi .\u018flb\u0259tt\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259 d\u0259 az yox idi…
\nBuras\u0131 da yad\u0131mdad\u0131 ki n\u0259n\u0259min tap\u015f\u0131r\u0131\u011f\u0131 il\u0259 xeyli t\u0259miz qar y\u0131\u011fard\u0131m. Qzana t\u00f6k\u00fcb soban\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 \u0259rid\u0259rdik v\u0259 qar\u0131n suyu il\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259ni \u00e7imizdir\u0259rdi.Q\u0131\u015fda soyuq havada bulaqlar donurdu ,\u015faylar buz ba\u011flay\u0131rd\u0131 Heyvanlar\u0131 sulamaq da m\u00fc\u015fk\u00fcl\u0259 \u00e7evrilirdi.Ki\u015fil\u0259r toxmaq ,balta g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb \u00e7ay\u0131n buz qat\u0131n\u0131 s\u0131nd\u0131rard\u0131lar.El\u0259 el\u0259y\u0259rdil\u0259r ki,heyvan\u0131n a\u011fz\u0131 suya \u00e7ats\u0131n. \u0130n\u0259kl\u0259r dizl\u0259rini qatlay\u0131b buzun \u00fcz\u0259rin\u0259 qoyurdu,ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 \u0259yib bumbuz suyu ciy\u0259rl\u0259rin\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kirdi.
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\nM\u00fcq\u0259dd\u0259s ma\u011far toylar\u0131n\u0131n s\u0259si -k\u00fcy\u00fc indi d\u0259 yerli -yataql\u0131 yad\u0131mdad\u0131r Biz u\u015faqlar\u0131 ma\u011fara buraxmazd\u0131lar .\u00c7ad\u0131r\u0131n aral\u0131 yerini tap\u0131b oradan maraqla toyun gedi\u015fat\u0131n\u0131 izl\u0259y\u0259rdik.Ma\u011far\u0131n bir t\u0259r\u0259find\u0259 ki\u015fil\u0259r dig\u0259r t\u0259r\u0259find\u0259 arvadlar oturard\u0131.Toyu iki a\u015f\u0131q bir balaban\u00e7\u0131 m\u00fc\u015faiy\u0259t ed\u0259rdi.El\u0259 ucadan q\u0131\u015fq\u0131rard\u0131lar ki ,s\u0259sl\u0259ri qon\u015fu k\u0259ndd\u0259 e\u015fidil\u0259rdi.Bir d\u0259 da\u011flar bu s\u0259si yerli- yataql\u0131 e\u015fid\u0259rdi.Kim bilir b\u0259lk\u0259 Tanr\u0131ya da gedib \u00e7at\u0131rd\u0131.H\u0259r halda bu s\u0259s ma\u011farda qapan\u0131b qalm\u0131rd\u0131.Haqq a\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n s\u0259sinin ma\u011fardan \u00e7\u0131x\u0131b haqq\u0131n d\u0259rgah\u0131na \u00e7atmas\u0131n\u0131 da normal saymaq olard\u0131.Balaban\u00e7\u0131n\u0131n boyu a\u015f\u0131qlardan xeyli balaca idi.El\u0259 bilirdin u\u015faqd\u0131.El\u0259 ki, balaban\u0131 f\u00fcl\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flay\u0131rd\u0131 \u00fcz\u00fc-g\u00f6z\u00fc h\u0259y\u0259timizd\u0259ki xoruzun pipiyi kimi q\u0131pq\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 q\u0131zar\u0131rd\u0131.O q\u0259d\u0259r q\u0131zar\u0131rd\u0131 ki ,tan\u0131nmaz hala d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrd\u00fc.\u00dcst\u0259lik ayaqlar\u0131n\u0131 r\u0259qs edirmi\u015f kimi dizd\u0259n qatlaya- qatlaya yeriyirdi .Dey\u0259rdin ki, yoxu\u015f \u00e7\u0131x\u0131r.A\u015f\u0131qlar\u0131n milli geyimind\u0259n f\u0259rqli olaraq balaban\u00e7\u0131 \u015fax qara kastyum geymi\u015fdi ,q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 qalstuk taxm\u0131\u015fd\u0131.El\u0259 bil q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 qalstuk taxmasayd\u0131 balaban\u0131n s\u0259si yax\u015f\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xmayacaqd\u0131.Balaban\u0131 f\u00fcl\u0259y\u0259- f\u00fcl\u0259y\u0259 bir k\u0259r\u0259m a\u015f\u0131qlara baxanda, be\u015f k\u0259r\u0259m d\u0259 oturanlara bax\u0131rd\u0131. Vay o g\u00fcn\u0259 ki ,-ya\u015fa ay balaban\u00e7\u0131 s\u0259nin \u0259v\u0259zin yoxdu,-dey\u0259ydin.R\u0259ngi bir az da q\u0131zar\u0131rd\u0131 ,q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131l\u0131q el\u0259yirdi,\u015fit\u0259nirdi.Burun p\u0259r\u0259l\u0259ri bir az da geni\u015fl\u0259nirdi,gozl\u0259ri o q\u0259d\u0259r b\u00f6y\u00fcy\u00fcrd\u00fc ki,deyirdin bu d\u0259qiq\u0259 p\u0131rtlay\u0131b kimins\u0259 bo\u015fqab\u0131na d\u00fc\u015f\u0259c\u0259k .H\u0259tta \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fcn n\u0259inki r\u0259ngi ,g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u00fc d\u0259 q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131ya \u00e7al\u0131rd\u0131.Balaban\u00e7\u0131 el\u0259 v\u0259ziyy\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrd\u00fc ki ,bu v\u0259ziyy\u0259td\u0259 onu he\u00e7 do\u011fma arvad\u0131 da tan\u0131ya bilm\u0259zdi.Amma \u00e7\u0131xartd\u0131\u011f\u0131 h\u0259ngam\u0259l\u0259r\u0259 baxmayaraq zal\u0131m o\u011flu \u00e7ox g\u00f6z\u0259l \u00e7al\u0131rd\u0131…Balaban\u00e7\u0131dan f\u0259rqli olaraq a\u015f\u0131qlar milli geyimd\u0259 olurdular. Xrom \u00e7\u0259km\u0259,q\u0259lfeyi \u015falvar ,kitel v\u0259 buxara papaq .O zaman tan\u0131nm\u0131\u015f a\u015f\u0131q Mikay\u0131l Azafl\u0131n\u0131 bizim k\u0259ndd\u0259 tez -tez toya \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rard\u0131lar.\u018fd\u0259b \u0259rkanl\u0131 ki\u015fiydi .\u00d6z\u00fcn\u00fcn g\u00f6z\u0259l qo\u015fmalar\u0131 ,g\u0259rayl\u0131lar\u0131 vard\u0131.Maraql\u0131 toy apar\u0131rd\u0131 .El aras\u0131nda h\u00f6rm\u0259tili ,izz\u0259tliydi .Onun apard\u0131\u011f\u0131 toyda ma\u011far\u0131n i\u00e7ind\u0259n \u00e7ox \u00e7\u00f6l\u00fcnd\u0259 xeyli adam topla\u015fard\u0131.Q\u0131z, g\u0259lin ,o\u011ful, u\u015faq \u00e7ad\u0131r\u0131n aras\u0131ndan da olsa s\u0259sini e\u015fitdikl\u0259ri bu a\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n nurlu \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00f6rm\u0259y\u0259 \u00e7al\u0131\u015fard\u0131lar. Ustad\u0131n apard\u0131\u011f\u0131 toy el \u015f\u0259nliyin\u0259 \u00e7evril\u0259rdi.A\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n ifas\u0131na ,\u015firin z\u0259ngul\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259 s\u00f6z ola bilm\u0259zdi.Azafl\u0131 oxuyanda ma\u011fara q\u0259rib\u0259 bir sakitlik \u00e7\u00f6k\u0259rdi.Bu s\u0259sd\u0259 n\u0259l\u0259r yox idi .Ma\u011farda d\u00f6vr\u0259 vuran bu azman a\u015f\u0131q saz\u0131yla ,s\u00f6z\u00fcyl\u0259 insanlar\u0131 ovsunlay\u0131rd\u0131. Saz\u0131n s\u0259si m\u0259nim u\u015faq qan\u0131m\u0131 co\u015fdururdu ,q\u0259rib\u0259 hissl\u0259r ke\u00e7irirdim. Bu s\u0259sd\u0259n da\u011flar\u0131n da \u00fcz\u00fc g\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fc.
\n“Qoca qartal n\u0259 g\u0259zirs\u0259n
\nDa\u011flar qoynunda qoynunda”
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\nBu xatir\u0259l\u0259rin ham\u0131s\u0131 m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn do\u011fmad\u0131 ,\u0259zizdir. Bunlar\u0131n s\u0131ras\u0131nda t\u0259bii ki ,novruz bayram\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6z yeri var.Ad\u0259tl\u0259rin ham\u0131s\u0131 dem\u0259k olar ki, yerin\u0259 yetirilirdi. \u00c7\u0259r\u015f\u0259nb\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n \u00f6nc\u0259 lopa d\u00fcz\u0259ld\u0259rdik.K\u00f6hn\u0259 par\u00e7alar\u0131 toplay\u0131b top kimi yumrulayard\u0131q,siml\u0259 b\u0259rk -b\u0259rk s\u0131xar,\u0259lav\u0259 d\u0259st\u0259k ba\u011flayard\u0131q .Sonra lopan\u0131 n\u00f6y\u00fcd\u0259 qoyard\u0131q ki ,davaml\u0131 yans\u0131n.S\u0259ri\u015ft\u0259m olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131na g\u00f6r\u0259 m\u0259nim lopam el\u0259 havadaca a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131. Qanad\u0131 q\u0131r\u0131lm\u0131\u015f qu\u015f kimi yer\u0259 s\u0259r\u0259l\u0259nirdi.Qon\u015fu u\u015faqlar s\u0259ri\u015ft\u0259sizliyim\u0259 doyunca g\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fcl\u0259r ki ,bu da bayrama \u0259lav\u0259 maraq qat\u0131rd\u0131.Bir n\u0259f\u0259r kims\u0259 p\u0259rt oldu\u011fumu g\u00f6r\u00fcb,-al m\u0259nim lopam\u0131 at- dedi.Amma k\u0259nardan g\u00f6yd\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u0259l kimi yan\u0131b d\u00f6vr\u0259 vuran lopalara baxmaq kimins\u0259 lopas\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6y\u0259 v\u0131z\u0131llatmaqdan m\u0259n\u0259 daha maraql\u0131 g\u0259lirdi.lopalar\u0131n v\u0131y\u0131lt\u0131s\u0131 qaranl\u0131q k\u0259ndi ba\u015f\u0131na g\u00f6t\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc. Ay bala yava\u015f tullay\u0131n ,dam\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259r,ot tayas\u0131n\u0131 yand\u0131rars\u0131z, – kimi s\u00f6zl\u0259r \u00e7ox e\u015fidilirdi ,lakin \u0259h\u0259miyy\u0259t ver\u0259n az idi.Amma n\u00f6vb\u0259ti ild\u0259 d\u00fcz\u0259ltdiyim lopan\u0131 lap qayaya da \u00e7\u0131rpsan da\u011f\u0131lan deyildi.G\u00f6y\u00fcn yeddinci qat\u0131na tolazlaya bilm\u0259s\u0259m d\u0259 \u00e7oxlar\u0131n\u0131 heyr\u0259tl\u0259ndir\u0259 bilirdim.Bu da bizim at\u0259\u015ff\u0259\u015fanl\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z idi.
\nNovruz ad\u0259tl\u0259rind\u0259n biri d\u0259 yumurta d\u00f6y\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcrm\u0259k idi.Bundan \u00f6t\u0259ri k\u0259ndd\u0259 ayr\u0131ca yer t\u0259yin olunmu\u015fdu. Kolxoz t\u00f6vl\u0259sinin yan\u0131.Bizim toyu\u011fun yumurtalar\u0131 o q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259 b\u0259rk olmurdu.El\u0259 di\u015fimd\u0259 s\u0131n\u0131rd\u0131.Uduzurdum N\u0259n\u0259m v\u0259ziyy\u0259ti g\u00f6r\u00fcb deyirdi ki ,-ay bala yumurtalar\u0131 apar\u0131b ona- buna verm\u0259 ,qay\u011fanaq el\u0259 ye. Bak\u0131ya ged\u0259n olsa bir az da anan gil\u0259 g\u00f6nd\u0259r\u0259k k\u0259nd yumurtas\u0131n\u0131n dad\u0131 bir ayr\u0131d\u0131 .Amma bunlar\u0131n he\u00e7 biri qula\u011f\u0131ma batm\u0131rd\u0131 .Qula\u011f\u0131m el\u0259 bil tutulmu\u015fdu ,novruzdan sanra a\u00e7\u0131lacaqd\u0131 .Bir- iki yumurta uda bils\u0259m h\u0259r \u015fey qaydas\u0131na d\u00fc\u015f\u0259rdi .H\u0259r halda bu m\u0259n\u0259 bel\u0259 g\u0259lirdi. Lakin \u0259lim g\u0259tirmirdi .Uduza-uduza gedirdim.Yumurta vedr\u0259sinin ax\u0131r\u0131na \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m .\u0130\u015f o yer\u0259 \u00e7at\u0131rd\u0131 ki,toyu\u011fun ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcn\u00fc k\u0259sdirib yumurtlamas\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdim.\u0130sti yumurtan\u0131 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb d\u00f6y\u00fc\u015f ustas\u0131 \u018fnv\u0259rin yan\u0131na qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131m.Yumurtan\u0131 ovcunun ortas\u0131nda tutub deyirdi ki-haras\u0131na ist\u0259yirs\u0259n vur.Amma zal\u0131m o\u011flunun yumurtas\u0131 el\u0259 bil da\u015fdan yonulmu\u015fdu. N\u0259inki m\u0259n he\u00e7 kim ona bata bilmirdi. Arada s\u00f6z g\u0259zirdi ki b\u0259s onun yumurtas\u0131 h\u0259\u015ft\u0259rxan toyu\u011funun yumurtas\u0131d\u0131r .Kims\u0259 ona g\u0259tirir.N\u0259 is\u0259 h\u0259r d\u0259f\u0259 \u0259lim \u0259t\u0259yimd\u0259n uzun ev\u0259 qay\u0131d\u0131rd\u0131m.N\u0259n\u0259min \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxa bilmirdim,x\u0259cal\u0259t \u00e7\u0259kirdim.O da y\u0259qin q\u0259ribliyim\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 x\u0259trim\u0259 d\u0259ymirdi …
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\nF\u0259sill\u0259rd\u0259n s\u00f6hb\u0259t a\u00e7\u0131b yaydan yazmamaq olmaz \u00c7\u00fcnki bu f\u0259sild\u0259 yay\u0131n \u00f6z\u00fc q\u0259d\u0259r isti xatir\u0259l\u0259rim var.\u015eah da\u011f\u0131n \u0259t\u0259yind\u0259 ‘\u00c7\u0259tind\u0259r\u0259 ‘adlanan yaylaqda \u00e7ox olmu\u015fam . U\u015faqlarla da\u011f\u0131n zirv\u0259sin\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r qalxm\u0131\u015fam .’Ha\u00e7a qaya ‘deyil\u0259n h\u00fcnd\u00fcrlkd\u0259n o \u00fcz\u0259 baxanda G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259 g\u00f6l\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcr.Bu zaman k\u0259ndimizd\u0259 ya\u015fayan g\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259lil\u0259r yad\u0131ma d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr.N\u0259 vaxtsa da\u011f\u0131n o \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259n bu \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 k\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcb g\u0259libl\u0259r.Hans\u0131 \u018fhm\u0259d – G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259li \u018fhm\u0259d .Bel\u0259c\u0259 ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n ad\u0131\u0131n\u0131n qaba\u011f\u0131nda G\u00f6y\u015f\u0259 var. G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259ni adlar\u0131nda \u0259b\u0259dil\u0259\u015fdiribl\u0259r.Onlar\u0131n aras\u0131nda g\u00f6z\u0259l bir saz \u00e7alan da var idi .M\u0259n onu b\u00f6y\u00fck h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 dinl\u0259y\u0259rdim. Sonralar m\u0259lum hadis\u0259l\u0259r ba\u015f ver\u0259nd\u0259 n\u0259inki G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259y\u0259 gedib g\u0259lm\u0259k m\u00fcmk\u00fcn olmad\u0131 ,h\u0259tta orada ya\u015fayanlar yerli dibli departasiya olundular H\u00fcseyn Arif “G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259lil\u0259r da\u011f\u0131lmay\u0131n g\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259d\u0259n “-\u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131\u015f\u0131 el\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259 ,insanlar\u0131n qaba\u011f\u0131n\u0131 almaq m\u00fcmk\u00fcn olmad\u0131. G\u00fcnki o boyda el -oban\u0131 \u00f6z torpa\u011f\u0131nnan dart\u0131b aparan tarixin t\u0259k\u0259ri idi . U\u015faql\u0131 b\u00f6y\u00fckl\u00fc, q\u0131zl\u0131 g\u0259linli ham\u0131s\u0131 bu t\u0259k\u0259rin \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 g\u0259lirdi . Bil\u0259nl\u0259r bilir ki ,tarixin t\u0259k\u0259rini geri d\u00f6nd\u0259rm\u0259k o q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259 asan deyil. \u0130ndi tarix h\u0259min t\u0259k\u0259rin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc n\u0259 vaxtsa G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259y\u0259 d\u00f6nd\u0259r\u0259c\u0259yi g\u00fcn\u00fc s\u0259birsizlikl\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259yir g\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259lil\u0259r…”G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259lil\u0259r da\u011f\u0131ld\u0131lar g\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259d\u0259n “-deyib H\u00fcseyn Arif\u0259 cavab yazan ad\u0131n\u0131 unutdu\u011fum \u015fair d\u0259 tarixin o iri b\u0259dheyb\u0259t t\u0259k\u0259rini g\u00f6r\u0259nd\u0259n sonra bismillah deyib susdu ..Ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc ki tarixin t\u0259k\u0259rini f\u0131rladan el\u0259 \u00e7\u0259rxi f\u0259l\u0259yin \u00f6z\u00fcd\u00fc.F\u0259l\u0259kl\u0259 \u00e7iling a\u011fac oynama\u011f\u0131n yeri deyil… H\u0259min o saz \u00e7alma\u011f\u0131ndan feyziyab oldu\u011fum g\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259lini ill\u0259r sonra g\u00f6rd\u00fcm .D\u00fcnya d\u0259yi\u015fdiyi kimi saz\u0131n s\u0259si d\u0259 xeyli d\u0259yi\u015fmi\u015fd\u0131..Yan\u0131ql\u0131 \u00e7al\u0131rd\u0131. El\u0259 bil bundan ba\u015fqa hava bilmirdi.Saz\u0131 sin\u0259sin\u0259 bas\u0131b-G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259m G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259m- deyib gah zil\u0259 qalx\u0131rd\u0131 ,gah da b\u0259m\u0259 enirdi . O boyda G\u00f6y\u00e7\u0259 d\u00f6n\u00fcb saz boyda olmu\u015fdu …Qay\u0131daq yayla\u011fa .Bizim in\u0259yi qohumumuz \u00f6z mallar\u0131na qataraq h\u0259r il “\u00c7\u0259tind\u0259r\u0259” yayla\u011f\u0131na k\u00f6\u00e7\u0259rdil\u0259r.C\u0259mi bir in\u0259kl\u0259 yayla\u011fa k\u00f6\u00e7m\u0259k \u0259lb\u0259tt\u0259 biz\u0259 s\u0259rf el\u0259m\u0259zdi .\u00dcst\u0259lik babam\u0131n ,n\u0259n\u0259min ixtiyar ya\u015f\u0131nda bu k\u00f6\u00e7\u00fc h\u0259yata ke\u00e7irm\u0259k fiziki c\u0259h\u0259td\u0259n d\u0259 \u00e7\u0259tin olard\u0131 .O s\u0259b\u0259bd\u0259n d\u0259 qohumumuz Arzuman day\u0131 b\u00f6y\u00fck m\u0259mnunluqla t\u0259p\u0259l in\u0259yimizin naz\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0259km\u0259li olurdu.Xeyli uzaqda yerl\u0259\u015f\u0259n h\u0259min o “\u00c7\u0259tind\u0259r\u0259 “yayla\u011f\u0131ndan biz\u0259 yar\u0131m aydan bir qara at\u0131 il\u0259 yavanl\u0131q g\u0259tir\u0259rdi.Milli arnamentl\u0259rl\u0259 b\u0259z\u0259nmi\u015f xurcunun \u00e7\u00f6l\u00fc kimi i\u00e7i d\u0259 b\u0259r\u0259k\u0259tliydi ,-qat\u0131q ,s\u00fczm\u0259,n\u0259hr\u0259 ya\u011f\u0131,\u015for ,ayran,pendir , bald\u0131r\u011fan cincilim… Arzuman day\u0131m\u0131n qara at\u0131n\u0131 q\u0131r ata, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc d\u0259 Koro\u011fluya b\u0259nz\u0259dirdim Biz\u0259 vaxtl\u0131- vaxt\u0131nda yavanl\u0131q g\u0259tir\u0259n bu g\u00fcl\u0259r\u00fcz ,\u00fcr\u0259yi a\u00e7\u0131q insan\u0131 ba\u015fqa c\u00fcr d\u0259y\u0259rl\u0259ndir\u0259 bilm\u0259zdim…
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\nK\u0259ndin g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fi q\u0131zmar olur alt\u0131nda \u00e7ox dayananda adam\u0131 qarald\u0131r .Qara d\u0259rilid\u0259n bir az f\u0259rqli olursan.K\u00f6lg\u0259si is\u0259 s\u0259rin olur .\u00c7ayda \u00e7imm\u0259yin l\u0259zz\u0259ti bir ba\u015fqad\u0131.Amma g\u0259r\u0259k \u00e7ay\u0131n qaba\u011f\u0131n\u0131n k\u0259silm\u0259sind\u0259 k\u00f6m\u0259k ed\u0259s\u0259n .\u00c7\u00fcm k\u0259s\u0259s\u0259n ,da\u015f da\u015f\u0131yasan.\u018fks halda \u00e7im\u0259nl\u0259ri k\u0259nardan seyr etm\u0259kd\u0259n \u00f6zg\u0259 \u00e7ar\u0259n qalmayacaq M\u0259nd\u0259 bu \u00f6hd\u0259liyi h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 yerin\u0259 yetirirdim ki u\u015faqlardan minn\u0259t g\u00f6t\u00fcrm\u0259yim.G\u00f6ld\u0259n \u00e7\u0131x\u0131b \u015f\u0259lal\u0259nin alt\u0131nda yaxalan\u0131rd\u0131q.T\u0259bi\u0259tin du\u015funun l\u0259zz\u0259ti ba\u015fqayd\u0131.B\u0259\u015f\u0131m\u0131z el\u0259 qar\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131 ki ,bird\u0259 e\u015fidirdik otard\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z mal qoyun g\u00f6zd\u0259n itibl\u0259r Paltar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 qoltu\u011fumuza al\u0131b yolda geyin\u0259- geyin\u0259 heyvanlar\u0131n dal\u0131nca qa\u00e7ard\u0131q.Kolxozun qoruq\u00e7usu bizi g\u00f6r\u00fcb ac\u0131qlanard\u0131, -ay\u0259 ay k\u00f6p\u0259y u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 mal\u0131 -heyvan\u0131 qoru\u011fa burax\u0131b \u00e7im\u0259rl\u0259rmi .A sizi do\u011fan arvad\u0131n qarn\u0131 c\u0131r\u0131ls\u0131n .Bir d\u0259 bel\u0259 el\u0259s\u0259niz d\u0259d\u0259niz\u0259 od qoyacam.U\u015faqlar qoruq\u00e7uya -get \u00f6z d\u0259d\u0259n\u0259 od qoy ,-deyib g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f\u0259rdil\u0259r.Amma m\u0259n n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 onlara qo\u015fulub g\u00fcl\u0259 bilmirdim.Ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 sal\u0131b g\u00fcnahgar oldu\u011fumu anlasam da,h\u0259m d\u0259 k\u0259nd u\u015faqlar\u0131n\u0131n bu c\u00fcr haz\u0131rcavab olmalar\u0131na h\u0259s\u0259d apar\u0131rd\u0131m…
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\nBir az da m\u0259kt\u0259b h\u0259yat\u0131ndan…
\nM\u0259kt\u0259bimiz k\u00f6hn\u0259ydi .H\u0259y\u0259tind\u0259 oyun meydan\u00e7as\u0131 v\u0259 iki \u0259d\u0259d turnik var idi.M\u0259kt\u0259bin dam\u0131nda g\u00f6y\u0259r\u00e7inl\u0259r yuva qurmu\u015fdu.G\u00f6y\u0259r\u00e7inl\u0259rin s\u0259si sinif otaqlar\u0131na dolurdu.U\u011fultulu s\u0259siydi.Ham\u0131 bu s\u0259s\u0259 \u00f6yr\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdi Allah\u0131n qu\u015fudu deyib qovmurdular. Bu s\u0259s \u0259ks\u0259r sinifl\u0259r\u0259 dolurdu v\u0259 he\u00e7 kim d\u0259 he\u00e7 n\u0259 demirdi .El\u0259 bil rayon t\u0259hsil \u015f\u00f6b\u0259sind\u0259n tap\u015f\u0131r\u0131q alm\u0131\u015fd\u0131lar .T\u0259n\u0259ff\u00fcz\u00fc bildirm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn d\u0259hlizd\u0259n iri bir d\u0259mir as\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ,dig\u0259r uzun d\u0259mirl\u0259 onu d\u00f6y\u0259cl\u0259yirdil\u0259r. Bu t\u00fck\u00fcrp\u0259dici s\u0259s el\u0259 g\u00fccl\u00fc idi ki m\u0259kt\u0259bd\u0259n xeyli uzaqda da e\u015fidilirdi .Bir d\u0259f\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259llim dedi ki b\u0259s qa\u00e7 z\u0259ngi s\u0259n vur. U\u015faq h\u0259v\u0259siml\u0259 bu tap\u015f\u0131r\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00e7oxdan g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdim. Z\u0259ngi vurma\u011f\u0131n mara\u011f\u0131ndayd\u0131m .D\u0259mir a\u011f\u0131r idi. Birt\u0259h\u0259r \u00fc\u00e7 -d\u00f6rd d\u0259f\u0259 g\u00fccl\u0259 o biri iri d\u0259mir\u0259 \u00e7\u0131rpa bildim.\u00dc\u00e7 g\u00fcn qolumun a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131ndan yata bilm\u0259dim …Q\u0131\u015fda da\u015f k\u00f6m\u00fcr sobas\u0131n\u0131n \u0259v\u0259zini he\u00e7 n\u0259 ver\u0259 bilm\u0259zdi. Soba q\u0131pq\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 q\u0131zar\u0131rd\u0131 . H\u0259min anda \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131b d\u0259mir\u00e7iy\u0259 imkan vers\u0259ydin k\u00f6r\u00fcks\u00fcz ,filans\u0131z o q\u0131zm\u0131\u015f d\u0259mird\u0259n el\u0259 sinifd\u0259c\u0259 yalan olmasn be\u015f -alt\u0131 at nal\u0131 d\u00fcz\u0259ld\u0259rdi . M\u00fc\u0259lliml\u0259rin d\u0259 d\u0259rsi bilm\u0259y\u0259n u\u015faqlar\u0131 qorxutduqlar\u0131 vasit\u0259 o q\u0131pq\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 q\u0131zm\u0131\u015f da\u015f k\u00f6m\u00fcr sobas\u0131 idi. – Ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 “pe\u00e7”\u0259 soxaram,- dem\u0259si b\u0259s el\u0259yirdi ki, u\u015faqlar qara g\u00fcnl\u0259rini qabqara bilsinl\u0259r. Bir- iki d\u0259f\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259llim \u015fagirdin ba\u015f\u0131ndan tutub pe\u00e7\u0259 yax\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 \u00f6z g\u00f6zl\u0259riml\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fcb heyr\u0259tl\u0259nmi\u015fdim \u018fvv\u0259l el\u0259 bilirdim kinoya bax\u0131ram .Sonra g\u00f6rd\u00fcm, yox m\u00fc\u0259llimin qoltu\u011funda tutdy\u011fu ba\u015f dostum Elxan\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131d\u0131r , he\u00e7 bir kino zad yoxdu ,real h\u0259yatd\u0131 Q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 sobaya d\u0259ym\u0259sin\u0259 birc\u0259 barmaq qal\u0131b . H\u0259min anda Elxan\u0131 Allah saxlad\u0131. N\u0259n\u0259mn\u0259n e\u015fitmi\u015fdim ki ,Allah r\u0259himlidi v\u0259 u\u015faqlar\u0131 \u00e7ox sev\u0259ndi. M\u00fc\u0259llim\u0259 qalsayd\u0131 Elxan\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131nda qirm\u0131z\u0131 sobadan yadigar m\u00fctl\u0259q n\u0259s\u0259 qalacaqd\u0131 .Bel\u0259 hallarda o soba bizim g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz\u0259 istilik m\u0259nb\u0259yi kimi yox i\u015fg\u0259nc\u0259 vasit\u0259si kimi g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc.Q\u0131z\u0131nmaq \u0259v\u0259zin\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259llimin qorxusundan \u00fc\u015f\u00fcy\u00fcrd\u00fck, titr\u0259yirdik. Kimins\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131n c\u0259llad k\u00f6t\u00fcy\u00fcn\u0259 ox\u015far o sobaya t\u0259r\u0259f g\u0259tirildiyini g\u00f6rm\u0259kd\u0259ns\u0259 soyuq sinifd\u0259 oturma\u011fa raz\u0131 idik. Maraql\u0131d\u0131r ki ,valideynl\u0259r d\u0259 bu i\u015f\u0259 qol qoyurdular. M\u00fc\u0259llim\u0259 -“m\u0259nim u\u015fa\u011f\u0131m d\u0259rsini oxumasa ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 “pe\u00e7\u0259” soxun”- deyirdil\u0259r ,he\u00e7 uf da el\u0259mirdil\u0259r. B\u00fct\u00fcn bunlara baxmayaraq neynirs\u0259n el\u0259, -oxuyan oxuyurdu oxumayan oxumurdu .
\nB\u0259zi m\u00fc\u0259lliml\u0259rin \u015fagirdl\u0259ri d\u00f6ym\u0259yi dediyim kimi adi hal alm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. H\u0259tta q\u0131zlar\u0131 da eyn\u0259n o\u011flanlar kimi d\u00f6y\u00fcrd\u00fcl\u0259r.Bir d\u0259f\u0259 riyaziyyat m\u00fc\u0259llimimiz d\u0259rs\u0259 haz\u0131r g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259n bir q\u0131z\u0131n aln\u0131na q\u0131zm\u0131\u015f da\u015f k\u00f6m\u00fcr pe\u00e7inin i\u00e7ind\u0259ki d\u0259mir \u00e7ubuqla el\u0259 bir n\u00f6qt\u0259 qoymu\u015fdu ki,deyil\u0259n\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 hind q\u0131z\u0131n\u0131n xal\u0131 onun yan\u0131nda he\u00e7 n\u0259ymi\u015f.Orta m\u0259kt\u0259bd\u0259n d\u0259 ona qalan el\u0259 o xal oldu.
\nRiyaziyyat m\u00fc\u0259lliminin \u015fill\u0259si d\u0259rsi bilm\u0259y\u0259n o\u011flanlar\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 tapan\u00e7a kimi a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131 .T\u0259xmin\u0259n d\u0259rsini bilm\u0259y\u0259n be\u015f- alt\u0131 n\u0259f\u0259r yaz\u0131 taxtas\u0131n\u0131n qaba\u011f\u0131na d\u00fcz\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fc. M\u00fc\u0259llim qolundak\u0131 saat\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131b stolun \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259 qoyurdu Sonra kostyumunu \u00e7\u0131xar\u0131rd\u0131 .El\u0259 bilirdin ki ,bu saat ispan \u00f6k\u00fcz\u00fc il\u0259 \u0259lb\u0259yaxa olacaq .\u015eill\u0259 ,t\u0259pik a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131 ,n\u0259 a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131 .Sanki \u015fagird yox ,\u0259sir d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259nl\u0259ri d\u00f6y\u00fcrd\u00fc .Bu z\u0259rb\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n \u015fagirdl\u0259rin n\u0259inki d\u0259rs ,adlar\u0131 da yadlar\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131.Bu qaydas\u0131z d\u00f6y\u00fc\u015f s\u0259hn\u0259si d\u0259rsin yar\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 apar\u0131rd\u0131.D\u00f6y\u00fcl\u0259n \u015fagirdl\u0259r a\u011fr\u0131dan bir ne\u00e7\u0259 g\u00fcn d\u0259rs\u0259 g\u0259lmirdil\u0259r.Maraql\u0131 buras\u0131 idi ki,valideynl\u0259r d\u0259 riyaziyyat m\u00fc\u0259lliminin bu qaydas\u0131z d\u00f6y\u00fc\u015f \u00fcsulunu t\u0259dris\u0259 t\u0259tbiq etm\u0259sini bir m\u0259nal\u0131 olaraq q\u0259bul edirdil\u0259r.V\u0259 d\u00f6y\u00fcl\u0259n \u00f6vladar\u0131 il\u0259 f\u0259xr edirdil\u0259r.Nec\u0259 dey\u0259rl\u0259r,-\u0259ti s\u0259nin ,s\u00fcm\u00fcy\u00fc m\u0259nim…Amma insaf\u0259n m\u00fc\u0259llimin qolu kimi biliyi d\u0259 g\u00fccl\u00fc idi.<\/p>\n

\u0130dman d\u0259rsind\u0259 iki s\u0131raya d\u00fcz\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fck. O\u011flanlar bir s\u0131rada q\u0131zlar bir s\u0131rada.\u0130dman zal\u0131 deyil\u0259n \u015fey yox idi.\u00c7ox vaxt d\u0259rsimizi ya\u011f\u0131\u015fl\u0131 v\u0259 soyuq havada ke\u00e7irdik.Bu s\u0259b\u0259bd\u0259n d\u0259 paltomuzu \u0259ynimizd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xartm\u0131rd\u0131q.Yer pal\u00e7\u0131q olanda \u0130\u015fl\u0259rimiz bir az da \u00e7\u0259tinl\u0259\u015firdi.Qal\u0131n geyim v\u0259 pal\u00e7\u0131ql\u0131 \u00e7\u0259km\u0259 il\u0259 turnikd\u0259 onbe\u015f d\u0259f\u0259 dart\u0131nmaq h\u0259r \u015fagirdin i\u015fi deyildi.Amma buna baxmayaraq idman m\u00fc\u0259llimimiz ham\u0131m\u0131za yuxar\u0131 qiym\u0259t yaz\u0131rd\u0131. Siz m\u0259nim balalar\u0131ms\u0131n\u0131z ,onbe\u015f d\u0259f\u0259 dart\u0131nmal\u0131s\u0131z amma \u0259yninizi ,pal\u00e7\u0131ql\u0131 \u00e7\u0259km\u0259nizi n\u0259z\u0259r\u0259 alsaq \u00fc\u00e7 d\u0259f\u0259 g\u00fccl\u0259 dart\u0131n\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131z. \u0130gidsiniz ki bunu bacar\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131z, -bunlar\u0131 h\u00f6rm\u0259tli idman m\u00fc\u0259llimiz deyirdi.Amma m\u0259n bel\u0259 d\u0259rsd\u0259n v\u0259 bu d\u0259rsd\u0259n ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m y\u00fcks\u0259k qiym\u0259t\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 utan\u0131rd\u0131m B\u00fct\u00fcn bunlara r\u0259\u011fm\u0259n m\u0259kt\u0259bimizd\u0259n idman\u00e7\u0131 yeti\u015fm\u0259di .\u0130dman ad\u0131nda- qa\u00e7\u0131b m\u0259kt\u0259bin h\u0259y\u0259tini d\u00f6vr\u0259 vuraraq q\u0131zlar\u0131n sa\u00e7\u0131n\u0131 dartmaqdan savay\u0131 yad\u0131mda \u00f6zg\u0259 bir \u015fey qalmay\u0131b…
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\nA\u011fl\u0131m k\u0259s\u0259nd\u0259n babam\u0131n stolunun \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 Nizaminin “X\u0259ms\u0259”sini S\u0259dinin “B\u00fcstan”\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f\u0259m.Babam bu kitablar\u0131 sev\u0259 -sev\u0259 oxuyard\u0131.H\u0259rd\u0259n h\u00fcnd\u00fcrd\u0259n oxuyard\u0131 ki ,h\u0259min o n\u0259sih\u0259tamiz s\u00f6zl\u0259ri m\u0259n d\u0259 e\u015fidim.G\u00fcnl\u0259rin birind\u0259 s\u00f6z\u0259 diqq\u0259tli oldu\u011fumu g\u00f6r\u00fcb,m\u0259ni kolxoz kitabxanas\u0131n\u0131n m\u00fcdiri ada\u015f\u0131 \u0130srafill\u0259 tan\u0131\u015f el\u0259di ki,\u0259lav\u0259 kitab oxuya bilim.Babam\u0131 g\u00f6r\u0259n kimi ,\u0130srafil ki\u015finin \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259 yaranan t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm kitabxanan\u0131n balaca k\u00f6hn\u0259 p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259sind\u0259n d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n i\u015fi\u011f\u0131 k\u00f6lg\u0259d\u0259 qoydu.V\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259ldi ki,bu a\u011fsaqqal kitabxana m\u00fcdirinin g\u00fcn i\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131na ox\u015far t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm\u00fc h\u0259min o k\u00f6hn\u0259 balaca p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n i\u015f\u0131q d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259s\u0259 bel\u0259, bu kolxoz kitabxanas\u0131n\u0131 kifay\u0259t q\u0259d\u0259r i\u015f\u0131qland\u0131rma\u011fa qadirdir.-M\u0259nim g\u00f6zl\u0259rim \u00fcst\u0259, n\u0259 vaxt g\u0259ls\u0259 kitablar ona qurband\u0131r ,lap kalxozun ma\u015f\u0131n\u0131n\u0131 g\u0259tirsin y\u0131\u011fs\u0131n arars\u0131n, uf el\u0259m\u0259r\u0259m, -dey\u0259 babam\u0131n ada\u015f\u0131 dill\u0259ndi . El\u0259 babam yan\u0131mda ola- ola bir -iki kitab se\u00e7ib verdi ki ,apar oxu s\u0259n ya\u015fda u\u015faqlar \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnd\u00fcr. -Babanla aram\u0131zda ayr\u0131 c\u00fcr x\u0259tir-h\u00f6rm\u0259t var,hans\u0131 kitab\u0131lar\u0131 xo\u015flay\u0131rsansa apar oxu.Bir g\u00fcn yen\u0259 g\u0259ldim ,ist\u0259diyim kitablar\u0131 se\u00e7dim ,sonra \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 g\u00f6st\u0259rdim, -yox qaytar yerin\u0259 qoy bunlar\u0131 ,s\u0259nin ya\u015f\u0131na uy\u011fun deyil ,h\u0259l\u0259lik al bu balaca kitabi apar oxu.Kitab dey\u0259nd\u0259 on-oniki s\u0259hif\u0259lik na\u011f\u0131l idi .Onu da n\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259n\u0259 dan\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015fd\u0131.\u018flimi r\u0259f\u0259 uzatd\u0131m ki ,bar\u0131 bunu d\u0259yi\u015fim.-Neynirs\u0259n, d\u0259ym\u0259 ,olmaz,dey\u0259 s\u0259sin\u0259 ton qatd\u0131 .Kimins\u0259 \u0259lind\u0259n b\u0259rk \u0259s\u0259bl\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdi ,ac\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 m\u0259nn\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xas\u0131 olmu\u015fdu Sars\u0131ld\u0131m ,incik bax\u0131\u015flarla \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxd\u0131m, \u0259vv\u0259l g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcm o t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcmd\u0259n i\u015f\u0131qdan \u0259s\u0259r -\u0259lam\u0259t qalmam\u0131\u015fd\u0131.\u0130st\u0259di yalandan da olsa \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc \u0259l\u0259 als\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00fcls\u00fcn. M\u00fcmk\u00fcn olmad\u0131.T\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm\u00fc yerli-dibli yoxa \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. N\u0259 ger\u00e7\u0259yi var idi ,n\u0259 d\u0259 saxtas\u0131 .Amma balaca p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n i\u015f\u0131q yerind\u0259ydi…
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\nAy caamat ,ay caamat hind kinosu g\u0259lib, hind kinosu g\u0259lib.K\u0259nd caamat\u0131 bu s\u0259si s\u0259brsizlikl\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259y\u0259rdi.Klub kolxoz idar\u0259sinin yan\u0131nda yerl\u0259\u015firdi \u00c7oxdan tikils\u0259 d\u0259 son tamamlama i\u015fl\u0259ri g\u00f6r\u00fclm\u0259mi\u015fdi.Klub oldu\u011funu m\u0259n deyir\u0259m ,amma klubluqdan \u0259s\u0259r-\u0259lam\u0259t yox idi.M\u00fcdir deyirdi ki \u0259y\u0259r-\u0259skiyini in\u015fallah g\u0259l\u0259n be\u015fillikd\u0259 d\u00fcz\u0259ld\u0259c\u0259yik.Bu d\u00f6rd divar ,bir- iki n\u0259f\u0259r damino , n\u0259rdtaxta oynayanlardan ba\u015fqa h\u0259m d\u0259, kolxozun otlaq sah\u0259l\u0259rin\u0259 dolan heyvanlar\u0131n saxlanma yeri,-bir n\u00f6v c\u0259rim\u0259 meydan\u00e7as\u0131 idi.Kolxozun qoruq\u00e7usu bu i\u015fin \u00f6hd\u0259sind\u0259n m\u0259har\u0259tl\u0259 g\u0259lirdi .Onu h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 yan\u0131nda heyvanla g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fcm .Qova -qova kluba g\u0259tirirdi .G\u00fcn\u00fcn g\u00fcnorta \u00e7a\u011f\u0131 burada hans\u0131 heyvana des\u0259n rast g\u0259lm\u0259k olard\u0131.Heyvanlar\u0131n xor s\u0259si maraql\u0131, v\u0259 \u0259yl\u0259nc\u0259li olsa da onlara yaz\u0131\u011f\u0131m g\u0259lirdi . G\u00f6zl\u0259yirdil\u0259r ki ,sahibl\u0259ri g\u0259lib onlara c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m kimi g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u0259n bu klub adlanan d\u00f6rd divardan xilas el\u0259sinl\u0259r.\u018fslind\u0259 bu dilsiz -a\u011f\u0131zs\u0131z heyvanlar\u0131n t\u0259qsiri yox idi .B\u00f6y\u00fcr\u0259n kim ,anq\u0131ran kim ,m\u0259l\u0259y\u0259n kim, -bu s\u0259sl\u0259r bir -birin\u0259 qar\u0131\u015faraq q\u0259rib\u0259 bir ansambl yarad\u0131rd\u0131 .El\u0259 ba\u015fa d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259k olard\u0131 ki, bu klub h\u0259m d\u0259 heyvanlar\u0131n istirah\u0259ti \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnd\u00fcr.
\nKino ax\u015famt\u0259r\u0259fi ba\u015flay\u0131rd\u0131.Bu vaxta q\u0259d\u0259r mal -qara klubdan bo\u015fald\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131,sahibin\u0259 t\u0259hvil verilirdi. Qal\u0131b hind kinosuna da baxa bil\u0259rdil\u0259r.Amma qar\u0131nlar\u0131 ac oldu\u011fundan qap\u0131dan ild\u0131d\u0131rm kimi \u00e7\u0131x\u0131rd\u0131lar.B\u0130r az da a\u011f\u0131llar\u0131 k\u0259ss\u0259ydi sahibl\u0259rinin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 lappan\u0131 bir t\u00fcp\u00fcr\u0259rdil\u0259r…Sonra klub heyvanlar\u0131n n\u0259cisind\u0259n ,sidiyind\u0259n t\u0259mizl\u0259n\u0259rdi.Amma k\u0259skin qoxu qal\u0131rd\u0131 ki,bunu da a\u011flamal\u0131 hind kinosunun t\u0259sirind\u0259n he\u00e7 kim hiss el\u0259mirdi…Klubun p\u0259rd\u0259l\u0259ri yox idi.Kino ver\u0259n bir qayda qoymu\u015fdu ki,kim evl\u0259rind\u0259n p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259l\u0259ri tutmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn odeyal g\u0259tirs\u0259 ,o kinoya pulsuz burax\u0131lacaq.Odeyal\u00e7\u0131lardan biri d\u0259 m\u0259n idim .Evimiz kluba yax\u0131n idi.N\u0259n\u0259m ay\u0131r\u0131b k\u0259nara qoymu\u015fdu ki ,bu kinonun odeyal\u0131d\u0131r.P\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259l\u0259r tutulan kimi kino ba\u015flay\u0131rd\u0131.Bir \u0259mmas\u0131 var idi ki,lent tez -tez q\u0131r\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131 .Bu zaman tama\u015fa\u00e7\u0131lar\u0131n s\u0259si klubu ba\u015f\u0131na g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcrd\u00fc.Q\u0131\u015fq\u0131ran kim,fit \u00e7alan kim…Filmin sonuna q\u0259d\u0259r bu lent q\u0131r\u0131lma prosesi be\u015f- alt\u0131 d\u0259f\u0259 t\u0259krar olunurdu .Bu da fanatlar\u0131 q\u0259z\u0259bl\u0259ndirirdi ,\u00f6zl\u0259rinin dediyi kimi kinonun l\u0259zz\u0259tini qa\u00e7\u0131rd\u0131rd\u0131 .”S\u0259nin g\u0259tirdiyin kino ba\u015f\u0131na d\u0259ysin,yek\u0259 ki\u015fis\u0259n bu n\u0259di \u0259\u0259\u0259 “,-kimi t\u0259hqiramiz ifad\u0259l\u0259r d\u0259 n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 lentq\u0131r\u0131lma m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259sini yoluna qoya bilmirdi.Pulu olmayanlar ,yaxud az olanlar ikinci seriyada i\u00e7\u0259ri burax\u0131l\u0131rd\u0131lar .\u00c7\u00f6ld\u0259 i\u00e7\u0259rid\u0259n \u00e7ox adam olurdu.Qap\u0131 a\u00e7\u0131lan kimi fanatlar bir- birl\u0259rinin ayaqlar\u0131n\u0131 tapdaya -tapdaya, \u0259z\u0259-\u0259z\u0259 i\u00e7\u0259ri el\u0259 t\u0259pilirdil\u0259r ki ,-he\u00e7 acl\u0131q d\u00f6vr\u00fcnd\u0259 \u00e7\u00f6r\u0259k \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 insanlaq bu v\u0259ziyy\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259yibl\u0259r .Hindistanin kino rejissorlar\u0131 bu m\u00fcsib\u0259ti g\u00f6rs\u0259ydil\u0259r n\u0259yin bahas\u0131na olursa olsun ,d\u0259rid\u0259n qab\u0131qdan \u00e7\u0131x\u0131b kinolar\u0131n\u0131n premyeras\u0131n\u0131 bizim k\u0259ndimizd\u0259 el\u0259y\u0259rdil\u0259r…Kino davam edirdi ,fanatlar \u00f6z i\u015fl\u0259rind\u0259ydi. X\u0259yal\u0259n biri Gitan\u0131 ,dig\u0259ri is\u0259 Zitan\u0131 qucaqlay\u0131rd\u0131. Amma o konki n\u0259dis\u0259 ona \u00fcr\u0259k el\u0259mirdil\u0259r…
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\nK\u0259ndimizd\u0259 ikinci cahan sava\u015f\u0131nda i\u015ftirak ed\u0259nl\u0259r az olmay\u0131b.Onlar\u0131n s\u0131ras\u0131nda qay\u0131danlar da olub ,v\u0259fat ed\u0259nl\u0259r d\u0259,itkin d\u00fc\u015f\u0259nl\u0259r d\u0259.G\u00fcnl\u0259rin birind\u0259 dostlar\u0131mla h\u0259y\u0259t -bacada s\u0259s salan zaman n\u0259n\u0259min h\u00f6vs\u0259l\u0259si darald\u0131.\u00c7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131b biz\u0259 dedi ki , gedin \u018fsg\u0259r baban\u0131z siz\u0259 m\u00fcharib\u0259d\u0259n dan\u0131\u015fs\u0131n .Maraql\u0131 xatir\u0259l\u0259ri var…\u018fsg\u0259r ki\u015fi yax\u0131n qon\u015fu idi.M\u0259n k\u0259nd\u0259 t\u0259z\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 bir a\u011fsaqqal kimi onunla da salam k\u0259smi\u015fdim .Amma m\u00fcharib\u0259 i\u015ftirak\u00e7\u0131s\u0131 oldu\u011funu bilmirdim.N\u0259n\u0259min t\u0259klifind\u0259n sonra \u018fsg\u0259r ki\u015finin m\u00fcharib\u0259li s\u00f6hb\u0259tin\u0259 mara\u011f\u0131m daha da artd\u0131.\u00c7\u00fcnki n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 onu m\u00fcharib\u0259 i\u015ftirak\u00e7\u0131s\u0131na ox\u015fada bilmirdim.M\u0259nim u\u015faq a\u011fl\u0131mla m\u00fcharib\u0259 i\u015ftirak\u00e7\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n yaxas\u0131nda \u00e7oxlu medal olmal\u0131yd\u0131.X\u00fclas\u0259 u\u015faqlarla k\u00f6hn\u0259 d\u00f6y\u00fc\u015f\u00e7\u00fcn\u00fcn evin\u0259 yolland\u0131q.H\u0259r birimiz\u0131n kimin o\u011flu oldu\u011fumuzula maraqland\u0131.\u018fslind\u0259 bizi tan\u0131y\u0131rd\u0131 amma yen\u0259 soru\u015fdu.-\u018fsg\u0259r baba k\u0259lmi\u015fik ki ,biz\u0259 davadan dan\u0131\u015fasan-dey\u0259 Telman g\u0259li\u015fimizin m\u0259qs\u0259dini a\u00e7\u0131qlad\u0131.Ortaya bir q\u0259d\u0259r s\u00fckut \u00e7\u00f6kd\u00fc .Diqq\u0259timiz \u018fsg\u0259r ki\u015fiy\u0259 y\u00f6n\u0259ldi.\u018fsg\u0259r ki\u015fi qocal\u0131qdan b\u00fck\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f belini m\u00fcmk\u00fcn q\u0259d\u0259r d\u00fcz\u0259ltdi,\u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 ciddilik verdi ,c\u0259sur d\u00f6y\u00fc\u015f\u00e7\u00fc g\u00f6rk\u0259mi almaq ist\u0259di amma al\u0131nmad\u0131, tez d\u0259 \u0259vv\u0259lki v\u0259ziyy\u0259tin\u0259 qay\u0131td\u0131.Beli t\u0259zd\u0259n b\u00fck\u00fcld\u00fc.\u00c7\u0259n\u0259si dizin\u0259 \u0259yildi.Cibind\u0259n k\u00f6hn\u0259 q\u0259zetd\u0259n k\u0259silmi\u015f bir b\u00fck\u00fcml\u00fck papiros ka\u011f\u0131z\u0131 \u00e7\u0131xartd\u0131 , s\u0259liq\u0259 il\u0259 qatlad\u0131 v\u0259 aras\u0131na balaca torbadan t\u0259nb\u0259ki s\u0259pdi, b\u00fck\u00fcb papiros d\u00fcz\u0259ltdi .Pe\u00e7in a\u011fz\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7d\u0131 ma\u015fa il\u0259 k\u00f6z g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb papirosu yand\u0131rd\u0131.Bir q\u00fcllab al\u0131b t\u00fcst\u00fcs\u00fcn\u00fc ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259n qap\u0131ya t\u0259r\u0259f f\u00fcl\u0259di.T\u00fcst\u00fcd\u0259n saralm\u0131\u015f b\u0131\u011flar\u0131 titr\u0259di ,\u0259sd\u0131 ,bir az da sarald\u0131.T\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n ayr\u0131 -ayr\u0131 h\u0259r birimizin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 diqq\u0259tl\u0259 baxd\u0131 .\u00d6z\u00fcnd\u0259n olsa b\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar o d\u0259h\u015f\u0259tli xatir\u0259l\u0259ri bir -bir yada salma\u011fa, h\u0259rbi sirl\u0259rl\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fd\u0131rmama\u011fa g\u00f6r\u0259ydi .Hiss el\u0259di ki, u\u015faq s\u0259brimiz da\u015f\u0131r . S\u00f6hb\u0259t\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131.- H\u0259, m\u0259nim balaca dostlar\u0131m.Allah he\u00e7 kimin y\u00f6n\u00fcn\u00fc m\u00fcharib\u0259d\u0259n salmas\u0131n.M\u0259n \u00e7ox \u00e7\u0259tin \u015f\u0259raitd\u0259 d\u00f6y\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f\u0259m D\u0259h\u015f\u0259tiydi.G\u00f6yd\u0259n qol- q\u0131l\u00e7a ya\u011f\u0131rd\u0131.Tank\u0131n, topun -t\u00fcf\u0259ngin s\u0259sind\u0259n yer -g\u00f6y titr\u0259yirdi,-deyib el\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131 ki ,dey\u0259rdin q\u0259l\u0259b\u0259 bayra\u011fn\u0131 Berlin\u0259 \u00f6z \u0259liyl\u0259 sanc\u0131b .El\u0259 bu zaman s\u00f6hb\u0259ti e\u015fid\u0259n \u00f6m\u00fcr -g\u00fcn yolda\u015f\u0131 S\u00fcr\u0259yya qar\u0131 d\u00f6zm\u0259yib m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259y\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fd\u0131, n\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fd\u0131. -M\u0259nim balalar\u0131m bavan\u0131z yalan deer, davada zadda olmooof .Yoldan yar\u0131m\u00e7\u0131q qay\u0131d\u0131f. O gedif \u00e7atana kimi m\u00fcharib\u0259 qutar\u0131f.Yalannan sizin ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131nz\u0131 allader.\u018fsg\u0259r ki\u015fi \u0259lini ma\u015faya atmaq ist\u0259di.Tez d\u0259 fikrind\u0259n d\u00f6nd\u00fc.\u00dcz\u00fcn\u00fc S\u00fcr\u0259yya arvada tutdu q\u0131\u015fq\u0131ra -q\u0131\u015fq\u0131ra,-y\u00fcz d\u0259f\u0259 demi\u015f\u0259m m\u0259nim dava s\u00f6hb\u0259tim\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fma ,arvadsan get arvad i\u015finl\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful ol ,-dedi.B\u0259lk\u0259 m\u0259nim yerim\u0259 davada s\u0259n olufsan xavar\u0131m\u0131z yoxdu ,hayyyy?…\u00d6sk\u00fcrm\u0259yi tutma\u011f\u0131ynan danla\u011f\u0131n\u0131n k\u0259silm\u0259yi bir oldu.G\u00f6zl\u0259ri ya\u015fard\u0131 .Saralm\u0131\u015f barmaqlar\u0131n\u0131n ucundak\u0131 s\u00f6nm\u0259kd\u0259 olan papirosu saralm\u0131\u015f b\u0131\u011flar\u0131na t\u0259r\u0259f el\u0259 apard\u0131 ki ,dey\u0259rdin indi yey\u0259c\u0259k .Sonuncu q\u00fcllab\u0131 ciy\u0259rin\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kib yen\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259n qap\u0131ya t\u0259r\u0259f f\u00fcl\u0259di.Hiss olunurdu ki, b\u0259rk \u0259s\u0259bl\u0259\u015fib.-Gedin ayr\u0131 vaxt g\u0259l\u0259rsiniz dan\u0131\u015faram-dedi…
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\n\u0130\u015f el\u0259 g\u0259tirdi ki ,babam x\u0259st\u0259l\u0259ndi .Atam onu m\u00fcalic\u0259 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn Bak\u0131ya g\u0259tirdi M\u00fcayin\u0259 el\u0259y\u0259n h\u0259kim t\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n x\u0259st\u0259ni k\u0259nd\u0259 qaytarma\u011f\u0131 m\u0259sl\u0259h\u0259t g\u00f6rd\u00fc.H\u0259r \u015fey ayd\u0131n idi.K\u0259nd\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259n sonra babam\u0131 g\u00f6rm\u0259y\u0259 xeyli adam ax\u0131\u015fd\u0131 .\u015e\u0259fa dil\u0259y\u0259n kim,halal\u0131q ist\u0259y\u0259n kim.Bu get-g\u0259ll\u0259rin \u00e7oxlu\u011funu hiss el\u0259y\u0259n babam el\u0259 bil adamlar\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxmaqdan yoruldu ,usand\u0131.H\u0259tta \u0259rki \u00e7atanlara eviniz -e\u015fiyiniz yoxdumu,-dedi.Get -g\u0259ld\u0259n, yaranan t\u00fcnl\u00fckd\u0259n yoruldu.Ay \u0130srafil \u0259mi bu filank\u0259sdi – tan\u0131d\u0131nm\u0131, bu be\u015fmank\u0259sdi tan\u0131d\u0131nm\u0131 ,-kimi t\u0259qdimatlardan bezdi. N\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 g\u0259lib ged\u0259nl\u0259r\u0259 yox, tavanda \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n ba\u015fqa he\u015f kimin g\u00f6r\u0259 bilm\u0259diyi bir n\u00f6qt\u0259y\u0259 baxmaq ona daha \u00e7ox xo\u015f g\u0259ldi .M\u0259nim u\u015faq a\u011fl\u0131ma o da g\u0259ldi ki , bibimin canidild\u0259n tan\u0131td\u0131\u011f\u0131 h\u0259min o qohum \u0259qr\u0259ban\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc babam tavanda” k\u0259\u015ff “el\u0259diyi n\u00f6qt\u0259d\u0259c\u0259 a\u00e7\u0131q -ayd\u0131n g\u00f6r\u00fcr .\u00c7\u00fcnki \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 baxmadan ,s\u0259sini e\u015fitm\u0259d\u0259n onlar\u0131 tan\u0131mas\u0131 m\u0259ni z\u0259nnimd\u0259 yan\u0131ltm\u0131rd\u0131.H\u0259tta bir- bir g\u0259lib ondan halall\u0131q almaq ist\u0259y\u0259nl\u0259r\u0259 d\u0259 \u00e7atd\u0131rm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 ki,z\u0259hm\u0259t \u00e7\u0259kib g\u0259lm\u0259yin-he\u00e7 kimd\u0259n incikliyim yoxdu, ham\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 ba\u011fr\u0131ma bas\u0131ram. Babam d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r tavandak\u0131 n\u00f6qt\u0259d\u0259n g\u00f6zl\u0259rini \u00e7\u0259km\u0259di. Bir- iki d\u0259f\u0259, y\u00f6n\u00fcm\u00fc da\u011flara t\u0259r\u0259f \u00e7evirin ,dedi,-v\u0259ssalam.Sonra yen\u0259 tavana o n\u00f6qt\u0259y\u0259 qay\u0131td\u0131 .El\u0259 bil b\u00fct\u00f6v d\u00fcnya h\u0259min o n\u00f6qt\u0259y\u0259 yerl\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdi Da\u011flar ,d\u0259r\u0259l\u0259r ,k\u0259nd ,el-oba ham\u0131s\u0131 orada ayd\u0131nca g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc .Amma o sirli n\u00f6qt\u0259d\u0259 bizim bilm\u0259diyimiz \u015feyl\u0259r d\u0259 \u00e7ox idi .V\u0259 babam\u0131n o n\u00f6qt\u0259y\u0259 baxa -baxa bir xeyli g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259diyinin \u015fahidiy\u0259m.\u0130ndiki a\u011fl\u0131mla yana\u015fanda deyir\u0259m y\u0259qin c\u0259nn\u0259tin i\u015fart\u0131lar\u0131 v\u0259 haqq d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131n a\u011f\u0131la g\u0259lm\u0259z g\u00f6z\u0259lliyi idi onu g\u00fcld\u00fcr\u0259n …M\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lirdi ki ,babam h\u0259min o ki\u00e7ik noqt\u0259d\u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck Allah\u0131 da g\u00f6r\u00fcr .\u00c7\u00fcnki \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 Allah adam\u0131yd\u0131 .\u0130nsanlardan ,d\u00fcnyadan doymu\u015fdu .B\u0259lk\u0259 el\u0259 ona g\u00f6r\u0259 haqq d\u00fcnyas\u0131 il\u0259 \u00fcz -\u00fcz\u0259 dayand\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir vaxtda kimliyind\u0259n as\u0131l\u0131 olmayaraq he\u00e7 k\u0259si g\u00f6r\u0259n g\u00f6z\u00fc yox idi .\u00dcz\u00fcn\u00fc bu d\u00fcnyaya \u00e7evir\u0259nd\u0259 a\u011fr\u0131s\u0131 daha da \u00e7oxal\u0131rd\u0131 Sanki xilas yolu tavandak\u0131 o n\u00f6qt\u0259d\u0259ydi .O n\u00f6qt\u0259 d\u0259 el\u0259- bel\u0259 n\u00f6qt\u0259 yox, el\u0259 bil haqq d\u00f6nyas\u0131n\u0131n qap\u0131s\u0131ym\u0131\u015f v\u0259 o qap\u0131n\u0131n a\u00e7\u0131lmas\u0131na az qal\u0131bm\u0131\u015f .Babam son d\u0259f\u0259 tavana baxd\u0131 v\u0259 d\u0259rind\u0259n g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259di .M\u0259n onun bu c\u00fcr g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259diyini g\u00f6rm\u0259mi\u015fdim .Da\u011flar\u0131n g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259m\u0259yind\u0259n d\u0259 m\u00f6ht\u0259\u015f\u0259miydi Anlad\u0131m ki ,haqq\u0131n d\u0259rgah\u0131na qovu\u015fmaqda olan babam sonuncu d\u0259f\u0259 bu d\u00fcnyaya g\u00fcl\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015f. Son g\u00fcl\u00fc\u015f daha \u0259z\u0259m\u0259tli v\u0259 daha yaddaqalan olur…Ay u\u015faq ,g\u0259l s\u0259n \u00e7\u00f6l\u0259 \u00e7\u0131x ,-qohumlardan kims\u0259 m\u0259n\u0259 s\u0259sl\u0259ndi…
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\nBabam haqq d\u00fcnyas\u0131na qovu\u015fandan sonra bir il d\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259ml\u0259 qalmal\u0131 oldum Babam\u0131n yeri g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc .\u018flimi hans\u0131 i\u015f\u0259 at\u0131rd\u0131msa s\u0259sini e\u015fidirdim,-ona d\u0259ym\u0259 ,bu i\u015f s\u0259nlik deyil,d\u0259rsl\u0259rini oxusan b\u0259s el\u0259y\u0259r…El\u0259 bu s\u0259si e\u015fid\u0259 -e\u015fid\u0259 m\u0259n babam\u0131n g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fc i\u015fl\u0259ri h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 yerin\u0259 yetir\u0259rdim . Amma n\u0259n\u0259m bu a\u011f\u0131r i\u015fl\u0259ri m\u0259n\u0259 q\u0131ym\u0131rd\u0131.Ba\u015fqa k\u00f6m\u0259yimiz yox idi.Mina bibim h\u0259rd\u0259n \u0259l yetirs\u0259 d\u0259 el\u0259 \u00e7ox vaxt\u0131 olmurdu.\u00d6z\u00fcn\u00fcn bir b\u00f6l\u00fck k\u00fclf\u0259ti var idi Bel\u0259c\u0259 t\u0259s\u0259rr\u00fcfat\u0131m\u0131zdan bir az ixtisar ed\u0259si olduq .T\u0259p\u0259l bir az da d\u0259li in\u0259yimizi babam\u0131n sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131nda satm\u0131\u015fd\u0131q.B\u0259hlul day\u0131m bu i\u015fd\u0259 biz\u0259 k\u00f6m\u0259k el\u0259mi\u015fdi.\u0130n\u0259yn ba\u015f\u0131na \u00e7at\u0131 ke\u00e7irib birt\u0259h\u0259r heyvan bazar\u0131na aparm\u0131\u015fd\u0131q .Day\u0131m zat\u0259n vuran idi.Babam dedi ki -a B\u0259hlul bu d\u0259li in\u0259yi sata bils\u0259k s\u0259ni Saratovkan\u0131n yem\u0259kxanas\u0131nda yax\u015f\u0131ca i\u00e7ird\u0259c\u0259m Bu g\u00fcnk\u00fc ara\u011f\u0131n m\u0259nlikdi.B\u0259hlul day\u0131m bu t\u0259klifd\u0259n m\u0259mnunluq hissi ke\u00e7irdi,-ba\u015f \u00fcst\u0259 \u0259mi -\u0259limizd\u0259 deyilmi .Bazara \u00e7atd\u0131q .Az ke\u00e7m\u0259di bir n\u0259f\u0259r biz\u0259 yaxinla\u015fd\u0131 Pulunu raz\u0131la\u015fd\u0131q \u0130n\u0259yi apard\u0131. Bir xeyli uzaqla\u015fm\u0131\u015fd\u0131q ki ,in\u0259k yed\u0259yind\u0259 h\u0259min o al\u0131c\u0131n\u0131n biz\u0259 t\u0259r\u0259f t\u0259l\u0259sdiyini g\u00f6rd\u00fcm -A\u011fsaqqal bu ki d\u0259lidir ,indid\u0259n m\u0259nn\u0259n buynuzla\u015f\u0131r , \u015f\u0131llaql\u0131y\u0131r sonra neyn\u0259y\u0259c\u0259m…\u0130n\u0259yin tutmas\u0131 tutmu\u015fdu.Xasiyy\u0259tin\u0259 b\u0259l\u0259d idik Satanda sevindik ki,n\u0259 yax\u015f\u0131 d\u0259lilik el\u0259m\u0259di.Budur sevincimiz \u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fczd\u0259n getm\u0259mi\u015f in\u0259k t\u0259z\u0259 sahibi il\u0259 b\u00f6yr\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc k\u0259sdirmi\u015fdi.Babam bir k\u0259lm\u0259 d\u0259 o yan bu yan dem\u0259di .Pulu qaytar\u0131b in\u0259yi geri ald\u0131q .B\u0259hlul day\u0131m dedi ki \u0259mi dar\u0131xma h\u0259r \u015fey yax\u015f\u0131 olacaq.Bazara qay\u0131td\u0131q.Yen\u0259 bir m\u00fc\u015ft\u0259ri g\u0259ldi.\u0130n\u0259k sakitl\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdi.Baxd\u0131 b\u0259y\u0259ndi.C\u0259mi bir d\u0259f\u0259 quyru\u011funu \u00e7\u0131rpd\u0131.O da mil\u00e7\u0259y\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 V\u0259ssalam.Qiym\u0259ti raz\u0131la\u015fd\u0131q Ayr\u0131ld\u0131q. Bayaqk\u0131ndanda az getmi\u015fdik ki ,in\u0259yi arxam\u0131zda g\u00f6rd\u00fck .-Siz Allah incim\u0259yin, qadan\u0131z alaram in\u0259k d\u0259lidir M\u0259n bunu saxlaya bilm\u0259r\u0259m.Babam yen\u0259 bir k\u0259lm\u0259 bel\u0259 dill\u0259nm\u0259di.Pulu cibin\u0259 nec\u0259 qoymu\u015fdusael\u0259c\u0259 d\u0259 qaytap\u0131b ki\u015fiy\u0259 verdi.Amma babam bu d\u0259f\u0259 in\u0259yin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 ac\u0131ql\u0131-ac\u0259ql\u0131 bir xeyli baxd\u0131 ,baxd\u0131.\u0130n\u0259k d\u0259 su\u00e7lu adamlar kimi ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 yer\u0259 dikmi\u015fdi. G\u00f6zl\u0259nilm\u0259d\u0259n babam in\u0259yin \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 t\u00fcp\u00fcrd\u00fc.Bu m\u0259n\u0259 \u00e7ox pis t\u0259sir el\u0259di.El\u0259 bil m\u0259nim \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 t\u00fcp\u00fcrd\u00fc.\u0130n\u0259y\u0259 yaz\u0131\u011f\u0131m g\u0259ldi \u018flimi uzatd\u0131m ki boynunu s\u0131\u011fallay\u0131m bir azda m\u0259n\u0259 q\u0131s\u0131ld\u0131.Hiss el\u0259dim ki,heyvan bizd\u0259n ayr\u0131lmaq ist\u0259mir ,dar\u0131x\u0131r.Amma babam bunun f\u0259rqind\u0259 deyildi.B\u0259rk \u0259s\u0259bl\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdi.M\u0259rh\u0259m\u0259t zad h\u0259rl\u0259mirdi.\u00dc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc d\u0259f\u0259 bazara girdik Bazar seyr\u0259lmi\u015fdi.\u00dcmidimizi \u00fcz\u00fcb kor pe\u015fman ev\u0259 qay\u0131tmaq ist\u0259yirdik ki,bir n\u0259f\u0259r biz\u0259 yax\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131.Raz\u0131la\u015f\u0131b d\u0259y\u0259rind\u0259n bir az da a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 in\u0259yi satd\u0131q.T\u0259z\u0259 sahibinin arxas\u0131nca k\u00f6n\u00fcls\u00fcz k\u00f6n\u00fcls\u00fcz yeriyirdi M\u0259n in\u0259yimiz \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn dar\u0131xd\u0131m amma arxas\u0131nca baxma\u011fa \u00e7ox macal tapmad\u0131m- Qa\u00e7aq u\u015faqlar, tez olun qa\u00e7aq he\u00e7 olmasa bu m\u00fc\u015ft\u0259ri g\u0259lib biz\u0259 \u00e7atmas\u0131n-dey\u0259 babam nigaran -nigaran p\u0131\u00e7\u0131ldad\u0131 .\u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fcz\u00fc bazardan xeyli aral\u0131da yerl\u0259\u015f\u0259n yem\u0259kxanaya t\u0259pdik.Bir xeyli ora -bura baxandan sonra sakitl\u0259\u015fdik .Babam yem\u0259k sifari\u015f el\u0259di.B\u0259hlul day\u0131m doyunca araq i\u00e7di.Ev\u0259 \u00e7atana q\u0259d\u0259r arxam\u0131za boylana -boylana g\u0259ldik.G\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcz yaman qorxmu\u015fdu …
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\nAlt\u0131nc\u0131 sinifd\u0259 oxuyurdum.Babam\u0131n v\u0259fat\u0131ndan sonra h\u0259yat\u0131mda bir bo\u015fluq hiss el\u0259yirdim Tez -tez iri \u00e7\u0259r\u00e7iv\u0259y\u0259 sal\u0131nm\u0131\u015f z\u0259hmli ,bir az da g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259r \u015f\u0259klin\u0259 bax\u0131rd\u0131m.Bax\u0131rd\u0131m dey\u0259nd\u0259 ki ,stolun \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259ydi \u0130\u00e7\u0259ri gir\u0259n kimi ist\u0259r- ist\u0259m\u0259z g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 sata\u015f\u0131rd\u0131 .Amma n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 z\u0259hmi g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259m\u0259yini \u00fcst\u0259l\u0259yirdi ,ya m\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lirdi.\u015e\u0259kil\u0259 baxanda qorxurdum,m\u0259ni vahim\u0259 bas\u0131rd\u0131.\u00d6l\u00fcm\u00fcn n\u0259 oldu\u011funu ,nec\u0259 oldu\u011funu u\u015faq a\u011fl\u0131m d\u0259rk el\u0259mirdi v\u0259 el\u0259y\u0259 d\u0259 bilm\u0259zdi.Bir s\u0259hv h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259t el\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 \u015f\u0259kil\u0259 baxma\u011fa \u00fcr\u0259k el\u0259mirdim .El\u0259 bilirdim yen\u0259 m\u0259ni danlayacaq, \u00fcst\u00fcm\u0259 ac\u0131qlanacaq .Zat\u0259n bu z\u0259himli, danlayic\u0131 ,istehzal\u0131 \u015f\u0259kil el\u0259 bil babamdan sonra da onu \u0259v\u0259z el\u0259m\u0259liydi v\u0259 sanki m\u0259nim bu g\u00fcn\u00fcm\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kilmi\u015fdi .H\u0259r d\u0259f\u0259 s\u0259hv h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259t el\u0259y\u0259nd\u0259 \u015f\u0259kli g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fcn qaba\u011f\u0131na g\u0259lirdi ,utan\u0131rd\u0131m,\u00e7\u0259kinirdim. Buras\u0131 da q\u0259rib\u0259dir ki ,babam\u0131n sa\u011fl\u0131\u011f\u0131nda \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259n o q\u0259d\u0259r qorxmurdum n\u0259inki indi bu q\u0131z\u0131l\u0131 \u00e7\u0259r\u00e7iv\u0259li \u015f\u0259klind\u0259n.M\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lirdi ki, babam \u00f6lm\u0259yib ,m\u0259ni s\u0131namaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn d\u00f6n\u00fcb \u015f\u0259kil olub. \u0130ndic\u0259 \u00e7\u0259r\u00e7iv\u0259d\u0259n d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcb yen\u0259 d\u0259 \u0259lini k\u00fcr\u0259yim\u0259 vuracaq -d\u0259rsl\u0259rini oxumusanm\u0131-dey\u0259 soru\u015facaq…M\u0259n h\u0259r g\u00fcn bu arzuyla, d\u0259li bir \u00fcm\u00fcdl\u0259 babam\u0131n \u015f\u0259klin\u0259 bax\u0131rd\u0131m,amma \u015f\u0259klin canl\u0131 adama d\u00f6nm\u0259k fikri yerli- dibli yoxuydu.Y\u0259qin d\u00fcnyada bel\u0259 bir m\u00f6c\u00fcz\u0259 ba\u015f vers\u0259ydi \u015f\u0259kild\u0259n diril\u0259nl\u0259rin \u0259lind\u0259n t\u0259rp\u0259nm\u0259k olmazd\u0131. Donmu\u015f z\u0259himli bax\u0131\u015f ,donmu\u015f t\u0259b\u0259ss\u00fcm,donmu\u015f zaman…N\u0259n\u0259m bil\u0259n d\u0259 ki ,babam\u0131n \u015f\u0259kilnd\u0259n qorxuram, \u00fcst\u00fcn\u00fc d\u0259smalla \u00f6rtd\u00fc v\u0259 tap\u015fird\u0131 ki ,\u00f6l\u00fcm haqq\u0131nda \u00e7ox fikirl\u0259\u015fm\u0259yim. Bir g\u00fcn yaranan bir g\u00fcn d\u0259 \u00f6l\u0259c\u0259k.Amma n\u0259n\u0259min ham\u0131ya m\u0259lum olan bu minillik f\u0259ls\u0259fi fikirl\u0259ri m\u0259nim u\u015faq d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnc\u0259l\u0259riml\u0259 \u00fcst -\u00fcst\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259s\u0259 d\u0259 onunla raz\u0131la\u015fmal\u0131yd\u0131m. Bu bar\u0259d\u0259 amerika a\u00e7ma\u011fa d\u0259ym\u0259zdi.
\nN\u00f6vb\u0259ti t\u0259dris ilin\u0259 az qalm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 .N\u0259n\u0259mi d\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb Bak\u0131ya evimiz\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259yi q\u0259rara g\u0259lmi\u015fdik G\u0259lmi\u015fdik dey\u0259nd\u0259 ki, atam\u0131 anam\u0131 bir z\u00fcl\u00fcml\u0259 raz\u0131la\u015fd\u0131rm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m.M\u0259n n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r sevinirdims\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259nd\u0259n d\u0259 \u00e7ox t\u0259\u0259ss\u00fcfl\u0259nirdi.Amma nec\u0259 dey\u0259rl\u0259r dir\u0259\u015fmi\u015fdim.Ail\u0259mizl\u0259 birg\u0259 olmaq ist\u0259yirdim.N\u0259n\u0259m\u0259 d\u0259 deyirdim ki ,be\u015f il m\u0259n sizd\u0259 qald\u0131m ,indi d\u0259 ged\u0259k s\u0259n bizd\u0259 qal.\u00dcr\u0259ksiz d\u0259 olsa raz\u0131la\u015f\u0131rd\u0131.Neyn\u0259k s\u0259n dey\u0259n olsun,- deyirdi. El\u0259 d\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fck t\u0259s\u0259rr\u00fcfat\u0131m\u0131z yox idi .Be\u015f -alt\u0131 toyuq -c\u00fcc\u0259ni qon\u015funun h\u0259y\u0259tin\u0259 k\u00fc\u015fk\u00fcrd\u00fcb k\u0259ndl\u0259 vidala\u015fd\u0131q .Amma evimiz\u0259 getm\u0259y\u0259 n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r sevindims\u0259 ondan da \u00e7ox k\u0259ndd\u0259n ayr\u0131lma\u011f\u0131ma k\u0259d\u0259rl\u0259ndim .G\u00f6zl\u0259rim k\u0259ndin halal ,z\u0259hm\u0259tke\u015f, ilqarl\u0131, imanl\u0131 adamlar\u0131na ,d\u0259r\u0259sin\u0259 ,d\u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259, a\u011fac\u0131na ,da\u015f\u0131na baxa -baxa gedib da\u011flarda dayand\u0131.Eyni il\u0259 k\u0259nd\u0259 t\u0259z\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcm da\u011flar idi .\u018fg\u0259r min ild\u0259 d\u0259yi\u015fm\u0259yibs\u0259 be\u015f ild\u0259 n\u0259 d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259c\u0259kdi ki …Bir d\u0259 insan deyil ha d\u0259yi\u015f\u0259,ne\u00e7\u0259 sif\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u0259…Bu v\u00fcqarl\u0131 da\u011flar\u0131n bir vaxtlar m\u0259nim k\u0259nd\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259yimd\u0259n x\u0259b\u0259rl\u0259ri var\u0131yd\u0131sa ,dem\u0259li getm\u0259yimd\u0259n d\u0259 x\u0259b\u0259rl\u0259ri olmal\u0131yd\u0131 .Oldu da. \u018fn \u00e7ox bax\u0131b vidala\u015fd\u0131\u011f\u0131m da\u011flar oldu ,dar\u0131xd\u0131m. Yam-ya\u015f\u0131l \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 bir xeyli tama\u015fa el\u0259dim,bir az da q\u00fcrurland\u0131m i\u00e7imn\u0259n q\u0259rib\u0259 hissl\u0259r ke\u00e7di.O boyda da\u011flar m\u0259n boyda u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 \u0259m\u0259lli ba\u015f\u0131l\u0131 k\u00f6vr\u0259ldirdi .Bu m\u0259nim bir vaxtlar qatarda k\u00f6vr\u0259lm\u0259yim\u0259 b\u0259nz\u0259yirdi.Bir zaman anamnan ayr\u0131landa dar\u0131xm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m,indi d\u0259 da\u011flardan ayr\u0131landa g\u00f6zl\u0259rim dolmu\u015fdu .\u00c7\u00fcnki bu k\u0259ndd\u0259 m\u0259n h\u0259r s\u0259h\u0259r yuxudan qalxanda ist\u0259r-ist\u0259m\u0259z h\u0259r \u015feyd\u0259n \u0259vv\u0259l o da\u011flar\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcrd\u00fcm.G\u00fcn\u0259\u015fli ,dumanl\u0131, \u00e7iskinli da\u011flar\u0131 .Da\u011flarla sa\u011folla\u015fmay\u0131b ,ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 a\u015fa\u011f\u0131 sal\u0131b nec\u0259 ged\u0259 bil\u0259rdim bu k\u0259ndd\u0259n. Nankorluq olard\u0131 .Bir d\u0259 bu k\u0259nd\u0259 n\u0259 \u00fczl\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259rd\u0131m …Ay\u0259 ,ay Allah k\u00f6m\u0259k olmu\u015f da\u011f g\u00f6rm\u00f6fs\u0259nmi n\u0259 \u00e7ox baxersan ,s\u0259ni g\u00f6zd\u00f6r\u0259k ax\u0131 ,- bu da bizi \u015f\u0259h\u0259r\u0259 yola salan s\u00fcr\u00fcc\u00fcn\u00fcn s\u0259siydi..
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\nN\u0259n\u0259m \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 q\u0259f\u0259sd\u0259ki qu\u015f kimi \u00e7\u0131rp\u0131nd\u0131 ya\u015fad\u0131. Bir az \u0259mim gild\u0259 qal\u0131rd\u0131 ,bir az bizd\u0259.\u018fmimgil \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc m\u0259rt\u0259b\u0259d\u0259 olurdular, biz is\u0259 be\u015finci. He\u00e7 birimizin h\u0259y\u0259t evi yoxuydu ki, bin\u0259va n\u0259n\u0259m yalandan da olsa \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc k\u0259ndd\u0259ki kimi hiss el\u0259sin.Bu minvalla on ild\u0259n \u00e7ox ya\u015fad\u0131.He\u00e7 kim\u0259 mane olmad\u0131 .Ad\u0259t\u0259n bir k\u00fcnc\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kilib yaddda\u015f\u0131nda g\u0259tirdiyi bayat\u0131lardan z\u00fcmz\u00fcm\u0259 el\u0259y\u0259rdi .O bayat\u0131larla x\u0259yal\u0259n k\u0259nd\u0259 da\u011flara ged\u0259rdi.Eyvanda \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00f6y\u0259 tutub dodaqlar\u0131n\u0131 t\u0259rp\u0259d\u0259rdi. Bel\u0259 v\u0259ziyy\u0259td\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m\u0259 baxma\u011f\u0131 xo\u015flayard\u0131m. M\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lirdi ki n\u0259n\u0259min oxudu\u011fu o bayatilar,g\u0259rayl\u0131lar da duad\u0131r v\u0259 Allah bunlar\u0131 \u015f\u0259ksiz -\u015f\u00fcbh\u0259siz e\u015fidir. Sonra n\u0259n\u0259m \u00f6z -\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131 , \u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00f6y\u0259 tutub n\u0259s\u0259 p\u0131\u015f\u0131lday\u0131rd\u0131,\u00f6z-\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. Bu dan\u0131\u015f\u0131q, bu p\u0131\u00e7\u0131lt\u0131 da m\u0259n\u0259 bayat\u0131 q\u0259d\u0259r \u015f\u0131rin, m\u0259nal\u0131 g\u0259lirdi . Yad\u0131nda qalan adamlar\u0131n ad\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0259kirdi ,\u00f6l\u0259nl\u0259r\u0259 r\u0259hm\u0259t oxuyurdu ,ruhlar\u0131na salavat \u00e7evirirdi.X\u0259yal\u0259n in\u0259k sa\u011f\u0131rd\u0131 ,toyuq -c\u00fcc\u0259y\u0259 d\u0259n verirdi ,k\u00fcrs\u00fcd\u0259 \u00e7\u00f6r\u0259k bi\u015firirdi , n\u0259hr\u0259 \u00e7alxay\u0131rd\u0131…X\u00fclas\u0259 h\u0259r g\u00fcn n\u0259n\u0259m bel\u0259c\u0259 xatir\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 k\u0259nd\u0259 gedib g\u0259lirdi. V\u0259 bu c\u00fcr qiyabi d\u0259 olsa k\u0259nd\u0259 gedib g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259, \u00fcz\u00fc bir az da nurlan\u0131rd\u0131 yanaqlar\u0131 ,q\u0131zar\u0131rd\u0131 .Baxan dey\u0259rdi ki el\u0259 do\u011frudan da bu d\u0259qiq\u0259 k\u0259ndd\u0259n g\u0259lib .Bel\u0259c\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m \u00f6z\u00fc- \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc ovundururdu ,ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 qat\u0131rd\u0131 .\u018fs\u0259d \u0259mim d\u0259 \u00f6z saz\u0131 -s\u00f6z\u00fc il\u0259 anas\u0131n\u0131 dar\u0131xma\u011fa qoymurdu .Dostu Valehl\u0259 h\u0259min o \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc m\u0259rt\u0259b\u0259d\u0259ki \u015f\u0259h\u0259r evind\u0259 k\u0259nd ab\u0131 havas\u0131 yarada bilirdi.El\u0259 g\u00f6z\u0259l \u00e7al\u0131b oxuyurdular ki, ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7evirib p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n asfalta baxmasan el\u0259 bil\u0259rdin ya\u015f\u0131l da\u011flar\u0131n qoynundasan.Amma b\u00fct\u00fcn bu h\u0259ngam\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259mi ovundurmaqdan \u00f6tr\u00fcyd\u00fc .N\u0259 k\u0259nd var\u0131yd\u0131 ,n\u0259 d\u0259 k\u0259s\u0259k .Ad\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0259kdiyim Valeh bizim qon\u015fu k\u0259ndd\u0259niydi .\u018fmimgilin qon\u015fulu\u011funda olurdu. Sah\u0259 m\u00fcv\u0259kkili i\u015fl\u0259yirdi. R\u00fctb\u0259si d\u0259 kapitan .H\u0259rd\u0259n \u0259miml\u0259 birlikd\u0259 el m\u0259clisin\u0259 d\u0259 ged\u0259rdil\u0259r. \u0130nsaf\u0259n yax\u015f\u0131 saz \u00e7al\u0131rd\u0131 ,h\u0259m d\u0259 oxuyurdu .Polis paltar\u0131nda is\u0259 saz ona bir ayr\u0131 c\u00fcr yara\u015f\u0131rd\u0131. M\u0259n\u0259 q\u0259rib\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259n oydu ki “u\u00e7astkov\u0131” olasan kabineti ba\u011flay\u0131b ged\u0259s\u0259n saz \u00e7alma\u011fa. Polis v\u0259 saz ilk bax\u0131\u015fdan q\u0259rib\u0259 s\u0259sl\u0259ns\u0259 d\u0259 Valehd\u0259 bir- birini \u00e7ox g\u00f6z\u0259l tamamlay\u0131rd\u0131. H\u0259tta m\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259lirdi ki ,o polis\u0259 i\u015f\u0259 gir\u0259nd\u0259 d\u0259 sazdan imtahan verib,ona qo\u015fma oxudublar, dastan s\u00f6yl\u0259dibl\u0259r. ” U\u00e7astkovu”nu soru\u015fanda ,-saz\u0131 ba\u011fr\u0131na bas\u0131b toy apar\u0131r harda olsa g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259k ,-x\u0259b\u0259ri adi hal alm\u0131\u015fd\u0131 .Saz\u0131 bu c\u00fcr d\u0259lic\u0259sin\u0259 sev\u0259r\u0259k pe\u015f\u0259sind\u0259n \u00fcst\u00fcn tutan,-a\u015f\u0131q Valehd\u0259n \u00f6zg\u0259 he\u00e7 kimi xat\u0131rlam\u0131ram .Amma insaf\u0259n \u00e7ox g\u00f6z\u0259l \u00e7al\u0131b oxuyurdu .\u018fs\u0259d \u0259mim ixtisasca neft m\u00fch\u0259ndisiydi. O da buruqdan \u00e7ox saz g\u00f6r\u00fcb. Amma i\u015fini, v\u0259zif\u0259sini d\u0259 l\u0259yaq\u0259tl\u0259 yerin\u0259 yetirirdi .M\u0259n a\u011fl\u0131m k\u0259s\u0259nd\u0259n onlar\u0131n evind\u0259 saz g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcm.Se\u00e7m\u0259 el \u015fairl\u0259rinin \u015feirl\u0259rind\u0259n ibar\u0259t d\u0259ft\u0259ri var\u0131yd\u0131.Ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 \u0259zb\u0259r bilirdi. O c\u00fcml\u0259d\u0259n dastan, ustadnam\u0259.Yadda\u015f\u0131na s\u00f6z ola bilm\u0259zdi. Bo\u015f vaxtlar\u0131mda onlara tez -tez ged\u0259rdim. Bilirdi ki ,\u0259n \u00e7ox saza g\u00f6r\u0259 g\u0259lir\u0259m. Q\u0131sa hal -\u0259hvaldan sonra saz\u0131 divardan d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcr\u0259r sin\u0259sin\u0259 bas\u0131b inl\u0259d\u0259rdi. Bu vaxtacan g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcm a\u015f\u0131qlardan dala qalmazd\u0131 .S\u0259s yerind\u0259 ,s\u00f6z yerind\u0259 .El aras\u0131nda dill\u0259r \u0259zb\u0259ri olan el \u015fairl\u0259rinin \u015feirl\u0259rini m\u0259n ilk d\u0259f\u0259 \u0259mimn\u0259n e\u015fitmi\u015f\u0259m .Hardan ,nec\u0259 toplay\u0131rd\u0131 bu \u015feirl\u0259ri- m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn maraql\u0131yd\u0131. El a\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131 olmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn b\u00fct\u00fcn \u015fans\u0131 var\u0131yd\u0131 .Amma neft m\u00fch\u0259ndisi v\u0259zif\u0259si onu da Valeh kimi \u00e7ox zild\u0259n getm\u0259y\u0259 qoymurdu .Evd\u0259kil\u0259r \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ,qonaqlar \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ,ki\u00e7ik m\u0259clisl\u0259r \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u00e7al\u0131b oxuyurdu .\u018fsas\u0259n d\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc q\u0259rib sayan n\u0259n\u0259mi dar\u0131xma\u011fa qoymurdu. Saz h\u0259m d\u0259 q\u0259ribliyin d\u0259rman\u0131yd\u0131 .\u018fs\u0259d \u0259mim n\u0259n\u0259min q\u0259ribliyini ona h\u0259min o telli sazla ah\u0259st\u0259-ah\u0259st\u0259 unutdururdu N\u0259n\u0259m a\u011fr\u0131yanda n\u0259 t\u0259zyiqini \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fcrd\u00fc n\u0259 d\u0259 t\u0259cili yard\u0131m \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131rd\u0131 ,\u0259lini divardak\u0131 saza uzad\u0131rd\u0131…
\nBir ne\u00e7\u0259 ild\u0259n sonra n\u0259n\u0259m d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259yi\u015fdi.\u018fslind\u0259 yen\u0259 ya\u015fayard\u0131 .Amma \u015f\u0259h\u0259r h\u0259yat\u0131 bir \u00e7ox hallarda k\u0259nd h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131n q\u0259sdin\u0259 durur. Sa\u011flam ,uzun m\u00fcdd\u0259t ya\u015fmaq \u015fans\u0131 ola bil\u0259c\u0259k ya\u015fl\u0131 k\u0259nd adamlar\u0131 \u0259ks\u0259r hallarda \u015f\u0259h\u0259r h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131n s\u0131na\u011f\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131xa bilmir onun “qurban\u0131”olurlar .\u00c7ox ya\u015famaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn onlara m\u0259hz k\u0259nd \u015f\u0259rait yarad\u0131r v\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fc d\u0259 buna zamin durur .Amma ah\u0131l ya\u015flar\u0131nda \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 ya\u015fama\u011fa m\u0259hkum olanlara k\u0259nd “m\u0259suliyy\u0259t “da\u015f\u0131m\u0131r.Bu s\u0259b\u0259bd\u0259n ya\u015fl\u0131 insanlar k\u0259nd\u0259 nisb\u0259t\u0259n \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 az ya\u015fay\u0131rlar. V\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259mi d\u0259 tale bel\u0259 bir s\u0131na\u011fa \u00e7\u0259ks\u0259 d\u0259 o doxsana yax\u0131n ya\u015fad\u0131 .Allaha \u00fcz tutub oxudu\u011fu dualar\u0131n s\u0259b\u0259biydi ki ,son d\u0259r\u0259c\u0259 urvatl\u0131 , imanl\u0131 getdi bu d\u00fcnyadan. Tanr\u0131ya yalvar\u0131rd\u0131 ki ,ona \u0259ziyy\u0259t verm\u0259sin ,\u0259li aya\u011f\u0131 sa\u011fk\u0259n ,corab\u0131n\u0131 gey\u0259rk\u0259n ,qa\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131 tutark\u0259n haqq d\u00fcnyas\u0131na qovu\u015fdursun. He\u00e7 kim\u0259 m\u00f6htac el\u0259m\u0259sin. Kimins\u0259 q\u0131na\u011f\u0131na, gileyin\u0259 tu\u015f g\u0259lm\u0259sin .N\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fc \u0259zab \u00e7\u0259ksin ,n\u0259 d\u0259 bir kims\u0259y\u0259 \u0259zab verm\u0259sin.\u00d6z\u00fc -\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc idar\u0259 el\u0259y\u0259 bilsin .Bu dualar\u0131 ,yalvar\u0131\u015flar\u0131 n\u0259n\u0259mn\u0259n m\u0259n d\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 \u00f6z qula\u011f\u0131mla e\u015fitmi\u015f\u0259m v\u0259 q\u0259rib\u0259 hissl\u0259r ke\u00e7irmi\u015f\u0259m. T\u0259bii ki ,n\u0259n\u0259min Tanr\u0131dan bel\u0259 bir \u00f6l\u00fcm “sifari\u015fini “o vaxt anlaya bilm\u0259zdim. Amma zaman ke\u00e7dikc\u0259, h\u0259yat\u0131 d\u0259rk el\u0259dikc\u0259 onun dualar\u0131n\u0131n \u0259h\u0259miyy\u0259tini bir daha anlad\u0131m ,d\u0259rk etdim. \u00c7ox ke\u00e7m\u0259di ki ,h\u0259min o g\u00f6z\u0259l \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn “sifari\u015fini” Tanr\u0131 q\u0259bul el\u0259di .El\u0259 d\u0259 oldu .Qadir Allah bu imanl\u0131 arvad\u0131n \u00f6m\u00fcrl\u00fcy\u00fcn\u0259 baxd\u0131 ,savab\u0131n\u0131 g\u00fcnah\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6n\u0259 -d\u00f6n\u0259 yoxlad\u0131 ,nurlu \u00fcz\u00fcn\u0259 n\u0259z\u0259r sald\u0131. Bu ilahi s\u0131naqlardan n\u0259n\u0259m \u00fcz\u00fc a\u011f \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131 .Allah\u0131n izni il\u0259 c\u0259nn\u0259tm\u0259kan oldu…
\nD\u00fcnyag\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f n\u0259n\u0259m, a\u011fbir\u00e7\u0259k n\u0259n\u0259m
\nDaha m\u0259ni d\u00f6ym\u00fcr, m\u0259ni yan\u0131m\u0131r
\nG\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn i\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131 azal\u0131b tamam
\nDaha adamlar\u0131 yax\u015f\u0131 tan\u0131m\u0131r<\/p>\n

H\u0259r d\u0259f\u0259 yan\u0131na ged\u0259nd\u0259 onun
\nN\u0259f\u0259simn\u0259n bilir g\u0259l\u0259n Xaliqdi
\n\u00dcz\u00fcmn\u0259n-g\u00f6z\u00fcmn\u0259n o q\u0259d\u0259r \u00f6p\u00fcr
\nBilir ki, Xaliq d\u0259 buna layiqdi<\/p>\n

Sonra da \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 bax\u0131b astaca
\nN\u0259s\u0259 p\u0131\u00e7\u0131lday\u0131r – deyir, – duad\u0131r
\nM\u0259nim apard\u0131\u011f\u0131m nan\u0259li konfet
\nN\u0259n\u0259min verdiyi xeyir – duad\u0131r<\/p>\n

Uzad\u0131b \u0259lini g\u00f6yl\u0259r\u0259 sar\u0131
\nOxuyur \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259 ax\u0131r k\u0259lm\u0259ni
\nEtibar el\u0259mir m\u0259ni he\u00e7 kim\u0259
\nBirba\u015fa Tanr\u0131ya tap\u015f\u0131r\u0131r m\u0259ni<\/p>\n

Allah hifz el\u0259y\u0259 bizi b\u0259ladan
\nTale \u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fcz\u0259 ac\u0131 baxmaya
\nM\u0259nim bu h\u0259yat\u0131m kimn\u0259n art\u0131qd\u0131
\nO xeyir – duad\u0131r m\u0259ni saxlayan…<\/p>\n

*****
\n\u018fs\u0259d \u0259mim \u00f6z i\u015f yerind\u0259n avtobus xahi\u015f el\u0259di ki, c\u0259naz\u0259ni k\u0259nd\u0259 apar\u0131b orada d\u0259fn ed\u0259k .Deyil\u0259n\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 d\u0259fn el\u0259s\u0259ydik n\u0259n\u0259min v\u0259 babam\u0131n ruhu \u00f6m\u00fcrbillah bizi ba\u011f\u0131\u015flamazd\u0131.H\u0259n\u0259m h\u0259r gec\u0259 yuxumuza girib dey\u0259c\u0259kdi ki ,-g\u00fcl kimi torpa\u011f\u0131, ill\u0259rdi bir yast\u0131\u011fa ba\u015f qoydu\u011fum \u0259rimin b\u00f6yr\u00fcn\u00fc qoyub niy\u0259 \u015f\u0259h\u0259rd\u0259 hans\u0131sa bir tan\u0131mad\u0131\u011f\u0131m arvad xayla\u011f\u0131n\u0131n yan\u0131nda basd\u0131rd\u0131n\u0131z .M\u0259nim bu q\u0259bristanl\u0131qda n\u0259 itim azm\u0131\u015fd\u0131… Bel\u0259c\u0259 yuxuda it \u0259zab\u0131 \u00e7\u0259k\u0259c\u0259kdik ,s\u0259ks\u0259k\u0259, sor\u011fu-sual ax\u0131r\u0131m\u0131za \u00e7\u0131xacaqd\u0131.Bu azm\u0131\u015f kimi bir t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259n d\u0259 ruhlar d\u00fcnyas\u0131ndan r\u0259hm\u0259tlik babam z\u0259himli bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131yla \u00fcz\u00fcm\u00fcz\u0259 baxacaq, n\u0259 ki var bizi q\u0131nayacaq, -arvad\u0131 k\u0259nd\u0259 g\u0259tir\u0259 bilm\u0259diniz, ruhunu incitdiniz ,t\u00fcp\u00fcr\u00fcm sizin m\u0259nliyiniz\u0259, -dey\u0259c\u0259k .B\u00fct\u00fcn bu s\u00f6y\u00fc\u015f dolu qatmaqar\u0131\u015f\u0131q yuxular\u0131 g\u00f6rm\u0259m\u0259k , yersiz danlaqlar\u0131 e\u015fitm\u0259m\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn be\u015f y\u00fcz yox, lap be\u015f y\u00fcz min kilometr m\u0259saf\u0259 d\u0259 q\u0259t etm\u0259yin\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259rdi. K\u00f6hn\u0259 “alaba\u015f” avtobus zar\u0131ya-zar\u0131ya \u00fcz\u00fc da\u011flara t\u0259r\u0259f qalx\u0131rd\u0131 .Avtobusun ortas\u0131nda xal\u00e7aya b\u00fck\u00fcl\u00fc c\u0259naz\u0259 qoyulmu\u015fdu. Otuqacaqlarda atam ,\u0259mim ,m\u0259n v\u0259 bir ne\u00e7\u0259 qohum oturmu\u015fdular. Gedib \u00e7atmaq bilmirdik .El\u0259 bil d\u00fcnyan\u0131n d\u0259rdini bu k\u00f6hn\u0259 avtobusa y\u00fckl\u0259mi\u015fdil\u0259r Q\u0131r\u011f\u0131z yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131s\u0131 \u00c7ingiz Aytmatovun “\u018fsr\u0259 b\u0259rab\u0259r g\u00fcn” roman\u0131 yad\u0131ma d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrd\u00fc .Bu s\u0259f\u0259rimiz romandak\u0131 hadis\u0259l\u0259rl\u0259 \u00e7ox s\u0259sl\u0259\u015firdi Yol q\u0131salmaq bilmirdi. Sanki G\u0259d\u0259b\u0259y\u0259 yox d\u00fcnyan\u0131n bu ba\u015f\u0131ndan o biri ba\u015f\u0131na gedirdik .C\u0259naz\u0259 n\u0259 yaman a\u011f\u0131r olurmu\u015f. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 c\u0259naz\u0259nin deyil ,ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u00f6mr\u00fcn a\u011f\u0131rl\u0131\u011f\u0131yd\u0131 . Yoxsa ki ,c\u0259naz\u0259 qu\u015f kimi y\u00fcng\u00fcl\u00fcyd\u00fc .M\u0259n bunu axtobusa qoyanda \u00f6z \u00e7iynimd\u0259 hiss el\u0259mi\u015fdim… Ax\u0131r ki \u00e7atd\u0131q. Alt\u0131 saatl\u0131q s\u00fckutdan qopa bildik .N\u0259n\u0259m n\u0259 k\u0259nd\u0259 g\u0259ldiyini bildi, n\u0259 bayat\u0131 dey\u0259 bildi, n\u0259 d\u0259 dua oxudu .\u00d6mr\u00fc bitmi\u015fdi .Dediyini demi\u015fdi ,oxudu\u011funu oxumu\u015fdu .\u0130ndi s\u00f6z mollan\u0131n idi.Qon\u015fular ,e\u015fidib bil\u0259nl\u0259r n\u0259n\u0259min ged\u0259r -g\u0259lm\u0259z\u0259 tu\u015flanan yolunu g\u00f6zl\u0259yirmi\u015fl\u0259r. Mina bibim, -m\u0259n s\u0259ni \u00e7iyind\u0259 yox \u00f6z ayaqlar\u0131nla g\u0259lm\u0259yini g\u00f6zl\u0259yirdim, bu n\u0259 i\u015fdi ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131za a\u00e7d\u0131n ay ana -dey\u0259r\u0259k f\u0259ryada ba\u015flad\u0131. O biri a\u011fla\u015fanlar da a\u011f\u0131 deyirdil\u0259r ,m\u0259clisin ruhuna uy\u011fun s\u00f6zl\u0259r i\u015fl\u0259dirdil\u0259r . N\u0259n\u0259m t\u0259bii ki bunlar\u0131n he\u015f birini e\u015fitmirdi v\u0259 s\u00f6z\u00fcn \u0259sl m\u0259nas\u0131nda bu d\u00fcnyadan x\u0259b\u0259ri yox idi .Art\u0131q o d\u00fcnyan\u0131n qap\u0131s\u0131ndan i\u00e7\u0259ri ke\u00e7mi\u015fdi .Ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 a\u011f\u0131 dey\u0259n arvadlar\u0131n yox,c\u0259nn\u0259td\u0259ki m\u0259l\u0259kl\u0259rin s\u0259sini e\u015fidirdi.A\u011f\u0131 dey\u0259nl\u0259r \u00f6zl\u0259ri a\u011flay\u0131b ,\u00f6zl\u0259ri d\u0259 e\u015fidirdil\u0259r. N\u0259n\u0259m h\u0259min anlarda dini qaydalarla des\u0259k o d\u00fcnyas\u0131 il\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011fuluydu v\u0259 \u0130nkir Minkirin suallar\u0131na cavab verirdi .G\u00fcnahlar\u0131, savablar\u0131 \u00f6l\u00e7\u00fcl\u00fcrd\u00fc ,c\u0259nn\u0259t , c\u0259h\u0259nn\u0259m m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259si h\u0259ll olunurdu.Ba\u015f\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. M\u0259n \u0259min idim ki, n\u0259n\u0259m c\u0259nn\u0259tlikdi. \u00c7\u00fcnki onun savab \u0259m\u0259li \u00e7oxuydu. Yava\u015f -yava\u015f a\u011fla\u015fma k\u0259sildi. Ota\u011f\u0131 q\u0259rib\u0259 bir s\u00fckut b\u00fcr\u00fcd\u00fc. A\u011fla\u015fanlar c\u0259naz\u0259y\u0259 el\u0259 bax\u0131rd\u0131lar ki ,sanki bu q\u0259d\u0259r g\u00f6z ya\u015f\u0131na g\u00f6r\u0259 n\u0259n\u0259m ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 qald\u0131r\u0131b onlara -\u00e7ox sa\u011f olun, dey\u0259c\u0259kdi .Amma da\u015fdan s\u0259s \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131 ,n\u0259n\u0259mn\u0259n yox .O sehirli al\u0259m\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc, \u00f6z i\u015find\u0259ydi, c\u0259nn\u0259tin da\u011flar\u0131nda bayat\u0131 oxuyurdu. M\u0259l\u0259kl\u0259r onu \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259ki nurdan tan\u0131m\u0131\u015fd\u0131lar . Hans\u0131 ki, n\u0259n\u0259m anadan olanda \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259ki o nur m\u0259l\u0259kl\u0259rd\u0259n ona \u0259man\u0259t verilmi\u015fdi.M\u0259n\u0259 el\u0259 g\u0259ldi ki ,h\u0259l\u0259 torpa\u011fa tap\u015f\u0131r\u0131lmam\u0131\u015fdan n\u0259n\u0259m bu q\u0259d\u0259r saf ,d\u00fczg\u00fcn ,imanl\u0131 olma\u011f\u0131yla n\u0259inki m\u0259l\u0259kl\u0259ri h\u0259tta Allah\u0131n \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc t\u0259\u0259cc\u00fcbl\u0259ndir\u0259 bildi. …N\u0259n\u0259mi k\u0259nd q\u0259bristanl\u0131\u011f\u0131nda babam\u0131n yan\u0131nda d\u0259fn el\u0259dik .Bir q\u0259d\u0259r arxay\u0131nla\u015fandan sonra evimiz\u0259, h\u0259y\u0259timiz\u0259 doyunca baxd\u0131m .Xatir\u0259l\u0259r ba\u015f qald\u0131rd\u0131 .\u00d6z\u00fcm\u00fc saxlaya bilm\u0259dim. H\u00f6nk\u00fcr -h\u00f6nk\u00fcr a\u011flad\u0131m .Bu c\u00fcr ilk d\u0259f\u0259 k\u0259nd\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 qatarda a\u011flam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. \u0130\u00e7imi \u00e7\u0259k\u0259 -\u00e7\u0259k\u0259 ba\u015f\u0131m\u0131 qald\u0131r\u0131b da\u011flara baxd\u0131m. Da\u011flar da k\u00f6vr\u0259lmi\u015fdi…
\n*****
\nS\u00f6z\u00fcm \u00fcr\u0259yim\u0259 y\u0131\u011f\u0131l\u0131b qal\u0131b
\nArzular, \u00fcmidl\u0259r y\u0131x\u0131l\u0131b qal\u0131b
\nTaleyim \u015f\u0259h\u0259r\u0259 s\u0131x\u0131l\u0131b qal\u0131b
\nM\u0259n s\u0259n\u0259 qay\u0131da bilm\u0259dim k\u0259ndim<\/p>\n

O q\u0131z\u0131n \u00fcz\u00fcnd\u0259n xal dad\u0131b g\u0259ldim
\nAr\u0131 p\u0259t\u0259yind\u0259n bal dad\u0131b g\u0259ldim
\nO boyda da\u011flar\u0131 aldad\u0131b g\u0259ldim
\nM\u0259n s\u0259n\u0259 qay\u0131da bilm\u0259dim k\u0259ndim<\/p>\n

Unutdum o ay\u0131, o ulduzlar\u0131
\nQayadan as\u0131lan salx\u0131m buz\u0131ar\u0131
\nK\u0259sdi qaba\u011f\u0131m\u0131 \u015f\u0259h\u0259r q\u0131zlar\u0131
\nM\u0259n s\u0259n\u0259 qay\u0131da bilm\u0259dim k\u0259ndim<\/p>\n

K\u00f6nl\u00fcmd\u0259 ayr\u0131l\u0131q,q\u00fcbar t\u0259rp\u0259ndi
\nS\u0259daq\u0259t, etibar,ilqar t\u0259rp\u0259ndi
\nGecikdim \u00e7atmad\u0131m, qatar t\u0259rp\u0259ndi
\nM\u0259n s\u0259n\u0259 qay\u0131da bilm\u0259dim k\u0259ndim<\/p>\n

Qoynunda c\u0131\u011f\u0131r\u0131m, izim qalmay\u0131b
\nDill\u0259rd\u0259 bir k\u0259lm\u0259 s\u00f6z\u00fcm qalmay\u0131b
\nIndi d\u0259 g\u0259lm\u0259y\u0259 \u00fcz\u00fcm qalmay\u0131b
\nM\u0259n s\u0259n\u0259 qay\u0131da bilm\u0259dim k\u0259ndim…
\n**************
\nSon<\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131ya 880 d\u0259f\u0259 bax\u0131l\u0131b<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

( xatir\u0259 – povest) davam\u0131… Az bir zamanda n\u0259n\u0259m m\u0259n\u0259 yem\u0259li bitkil\u0259ri ,otlar\u0131 tan\u0131td\u0131.Quzuqula\u011f\u0131 pi\u015fikcayna\u011f\u0131 ,qoyunqula\u011f\u0131 ,cincilim,lilpar ,q\u0131j\u0131- q\u0131j\u0131,yemlikotu ,bald\u0131r\u011fan \u0259m\u0259nk\u00f6m\u0259nci,\u0259v\u0259lik,yolotu v\u0259 ba\u015fqa bitkil\u0259rin hans\u0131 \u015f\u0259raitd\u0259 bitdiyini ,nec\u0259 y\u0131\u011f\u0131l\u0131b yeyildiyini bir- bir ba\u015fa sald\u0131.\u018flimi dalad\u0131\u011f\u0131 ilk g\u00fcnn\u0259n gicitkandan z\u0259hl\u0259m getdi.Baxmayaraq ki, yel x\u0259st\u0259liyinin d\u0259rman\u0131yd\u0131. N\u0259n\u0259m \u00e7ox i\u015fl\u0259dirdi.\u018fm\u0259nk\u00f6m\u0259ncini, yolotunu xo\u015flayard\u0131m.Yaz vaxt\u0131 \u0259lim\u0259 b\u0131\u00e7aq vedr\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcb d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrdim […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":13442,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[16,3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14124"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=14124"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14124\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14125,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14124\/revisions\/14125"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/13442"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=14124"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=14124"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=14124"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}