{"id":16295,"date":"2021-02-13T23:12:28","date_gmt":"2021-02-13T19:12:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=16295"},"modified":"2021-02-13T23:12:28","modified_gmt":"2021-02-13T19:12:28","slug":"zaur-bayramoglu-d%c9%99y%c9%99rlim-s%c9%99sli","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=16295","title":{"rendered":"Zaur Bayramo\u011flu – D\u0259y\u0259rlim… (s\u0259sli)"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"zaur<\/a>S\u0259n m\u0259nim d\u0259y\u0259rlims\u0259n…<\/p>\n

G\u00f6zl\u0259rinin d\u0259rinliyind\u0259 bo\u011fuldu\u011fum, bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131nda h\u0259bs oldu\u011fum, n\u0259f\u0259sinin at\u0259\u015find\u0259 yand\u0131\u011f\u0131m d\u0259y\u0259rlim…<\/p>\n

Amma bunu bilmirs\u0259n…<\/p>\n

B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fl\u0259rimizd\u0259 hiss etmis\u0259n, sevgi dolu bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131mdan, quruyan dil-doda\u011f\u0131mdan, ya da q\u0131zar\u0131b-p\u00f6rt\u0259n sif\u0259timd\u0259n…<\/p>\n

Amma b\u00fcruz\u0259 vermirs\u0259n…<\/p>\n

H\u0259r ax\u015fam s\u0259nsizliyin yaln\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131 gec\u0259nin z\u00fclm\u0259tiyl\u0259 birl\u0259\u015fib m\u0259ni a\u011fu\u015funa al\u0131nca, \u00f6z-\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 s\u00f6z verir\u0259m: – \u0130lk f\u00fcrs\u0259td\u0259 etiraf ed\u0259c\u0259m m\u0259nim\u00e7\u00fcn n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259y\u0259rli oldu\u011funu…<\/p>\n

Amma g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcy\u00fcm\u00fczd\u0259 g\u00f6z\u0259lliyinin cazib\u0259sin\u0259 qap\u0131l\u0131r, saatlar, h\u0259tta g\u00fcnl\u0259r \u00f6nc\u0259sind\u0259n \u0259zb\u0259rl\u0259diyim e\u015fqnam\u0259mi unudur, m\u00fc\u0259llim\u0259sin\u0259 haz\u0131rl\u0131qs\u0131z yaxalanan u\u015faq kimi \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc itirir, udquna-udquna qal\u0131ram…<\/p>\n

S\u0259nsiz ke\u00e7\u0259n g\u00fcnl\u0259rimd\u0259 h\u0259r mesaj s\u0259sind\u0259 s\u0259ks\u0259n\u0259r\u0259k telefonun ekran\u0131na zill\u0259n\u0259n g\u00f6zl\u0259rim \u00fcmidsizlikl\u0259 q\u0131rp\u0131l\u0131r v\u0259 \u2013 yazmayacaq, \u2013 dey\u0259 dodaqalt\u0131 deyinib k\u00f6ks \u00f6t\u00fcr\u00fcr, bir bils\u0259n mesaj\u0131n\u0131n \u00f6nizl\u0259m\u0259sin\u0259 bax\u0131b g\u00fcl\u00fcms\u0259m\u0259yi n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r \u00f6zl\u0259dim, can\u0131n yanmas\u0131n, \u2013 dey\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcml\u0259 dan\u0131\u015f\u0131r, \u00e7atd\u0131\u011f\u0131m qa\u015flar\u0131m\u0131n alt\u0131ndan q\u0131y\u0131lm\u0131\u015f g\u00f6zl\u0259rimi m\u0259chula zill\u0259y\u0259r\u0259k: – Niy\u0259 d\u0259 yazmal\u0131d\u0131r ax\u0131, \u2013 dey\u0259 donquldan\u0131r, \u00f6z-\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 s\u00f6z verir\u0259m:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0 \u0130lk f\u00fcrs\u0259td\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259rinin i\u00e7in\u0259 bax\u0131b s\u00f6yl\u0259y\u0259c\u0259y\u0259m, m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259y\u0259rli oldu\u011funu…<\/p>\n

Amma g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcy\u00fcm\u00fczd\u0259 h\u0259r \u015fey t\u0259krarlan\u0131r v\u0259 \u015f\u0259n q\u0259hq\u0259h\u0259l\u0259rini izl\u0259m\u0259kl\u0259 yetinir\u0259m, bir d\u0259 d\u0259niz kimi dal\u011falanan sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131…<\/p>\n

V\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcml\u0259 bacarm\u0131ram, n\u0259inki etiraf etm\u0259k, he\u00e7 g\u00f6zl\u0259rinin i\u00e7in\u0259 baxa bilmir\u0259m…<\/p>\n

V\u0259 niy\u0259 bu q\u0259d\u0259r aciz oldu\u011fumu da bilmir\u0259m…<\/p>\n

Y\u0259qin s\u0259nin g\u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259r d\u0259r\u0259c\u0259mi bilm\u0259diyimd\u0259n…<\/p>\n

Bils\u0259ydim, c\u0259sar\u0259tl\u0259n\u0259rdim…<\/p>\n

Amma bilmir\u0259m…<\/p>\n

H\u0259r halda s\u0259n m\u0259nim d\u0259y\u0259rlims\u0259n…<\/p>\n

U\u011fruna \u00f6l\u0259c\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r sevdiyim…<\/p>\n

Ya da \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u0259c\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r…<\/p>\n

N\u0259 f\u0259rq ed\u0259r ki?…<\/p>\n

B\u0259z\u0259n parkda, a\u011faclar\u0131n alt\u0131nda g\u0259zi\u015fdiyimizd\u0259, ya da d\u0259nizin k\u0259nar\u0131nda qumlar\u0131n \u00fcst\u00fcnd\u0259 \u0259l-\u0259l\u0259 tutub qa\u00e7d\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda ki\u00e7icik l\u0259p\u0259l\u0259r sanki bizi \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131rlarm\u0131\u015f kimi ayaqlar\u0131m\u0131za toxunub d\u0259niz\u0259 do\u011fru \u00e7\u0259kilir…<\/p>\n

Anid\u0259n dayan\u0131b s\u0259ni \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 \u00e7\u0259kir\u0259m v\u0259 yerind\u0259 f\u0131rlan\u0131b y\u0131x\u0131lmamaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn sin\u0259m\u0259 yaslan\u0131rsan…<\/p>\n

Astadan \u0259s\u0259n k\u00fcl\u0259yin t\u0259ngiy\u0259n n\u0259f\u0259sinl\u0259 qar\u0131\u015f\u0131b qulaqlar\u0131ma p\u0131\u00e7\u0131ldad\u0131\u011f\u0131 m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259t simfoniyas\u0131n\u0131 dinl\u0259y\u0259-dinl\u0259y\u0259 sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 ox\u015fay\u0131r, \u0259ll\u0259rimi yanaqlar\u0131nda g\u0259zdirir, barmaqlar\u0131mla \u0259tli dodaqlar\u0131na toxunuram…<\/p>\n

V\u0259 k\u00fcl\u0259yin u\u00e7u\u015fdurdu\u011fu sa\u00e7lar\u0131n\u0131 toplayaraq yana\u011f\u0131ndak\u0131 \u00e7\u00f6k\u0259y\u0259 \u00f6p\u00fcc\u00fck qonduracaqk\u0259n telefonuma g\u0259l\u0259n z\u0259ng, ya da k\u00fc\u00e7\u0259d\u0259 ba\u011f\u0131r\u0131\u015fan s\u0259yyar sat\u0131c\u0131lar\u0131n bo\u011fuq s\u0259si ay\u0131r\u0131r m\u0259ni x\u0259yallar\u0131mdan.<\/p>\n

L\u0259n\u0259t olsun! \u2013 dey\u0259 q\u0131cad\u0131\u011f\u0131m di\u015fl\u0259rimin aras\u0131ndan f\u0131s\u0131lday\u0131b oturdu\u011fum yerd\u0259c\u0259 ayaqlar\u0131m\u0131 qarn\u0131ma \u00e7\u0259kir, aln\u0131m\u0131 dizl\u0259rim\u0259 s\u00f6yk\u0259y\u0259r\u0259k x\u0259yallar\u0131na qay\u0131tmaq ist\u0259y\u0259n u\u015faq safl\u0131\u011f\u0131yla g\u00f6zl\u0259rimi b\u0259rk-b\u0259rk yumur, dua edirmi\u015f kimi astaca p\u0131\u00e7\u0131lday\u0131ram: – S\u0259n m\u0259nim d\u0259y\u0259rlims\u0259n…<\/p>\n

U\u011fruna \u00f6l\u0259c\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r sevdiyim…<\/p>\n

Ya da \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u0259c\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r…<\/p>\n

V\u0259 \u00f6z-\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 s\u00f6z verir\u0259m:<\/p>\n

– Bu q\u0259lb bu sin\u0259d\u0259 d\u00f6y\u00fcnd\u00fcy\u00fc s\u00fcr\u0259c\u0259 x\u0259yallar\u0131mda ya\u015fadacam s\u0259ni…
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