{"id":7267,"date":"2014-12-11T19:34:34","date_gmt":"2014-12-11T15:34:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=7267"},"modified":"2014-12-11T22:50:09","modified_gmt":"2014-12-11T18:50:09","slug":"ziba-x%c9%99lil-yeni-seirl%c9%99r","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=7267","title":{"rendered":"Ziba X\u0259lil \u0130\u015f\u0131q – Yeni \u015feirl\u0259r"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"10264968_508765785932123_8030793936098235605_n\"<\/a><\/p>\n

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131,<\/p>\n

g\u00f6z\u00fcn ya\u015f\u0131 ax\u0131b, ax\u0131b\u00a0 qurtard\u0131.<\/p>\n

\u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131 q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259rdin<\/p>\n

b\u00fct\u00fcn d\u00fcnyan\u0131 tutdu.<\/p>\n

arzun\u00a0 vard\u0131 \u00e7ox deyil,<\/p>\n

ki\u00e7ik \u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131 boyda.<\/p>\n

g\u0259ncliyinin \u0259n t\u0259miz , \u0259n m\u00fcq\u0259dd\u0259s \u00a0\u00e7a\u011f\u0131nda.<\/p>\n

bir \u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131 boyda\u00a0 sevgi vard\u0131 i\u00e7ind\u0259.<\/p>\n

b\u00f6y\u00fcy\u00fcb\u00a0 d\u00fcnya q\u0259d\u0259r \u00a0ola bil\u0259c\u0259k sevgi.<\/p>\n

kims\u0259nin bilm\u0259diyi,<\/p>\n

kims\u0259nin bulmad\u0131\u011f\u0131.<\/p>\n

bir \u0259l\u00a0 toxunmad\u0131\u011f\u0131-<\/p>\n

\u00fclvi\u00a0 hissl\u0259r\u00a0 yumrusu.<\/p>\n

mavi\u00a0 g\u00f6yl\u00fc, g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fli,\u00a0 ya\u015f\u0131l \u00e7\u0259m\u0259nli \u00a0d\u00fcnya.<\/p>\n

arzular\u0131n r\u0259ngar\u0259ng,<\/p>\n

yuxular\u0131n ki\u00e7icik – kims\u0259nin girm\u0259diyi<\/p>\n

kims\u0259nin\u00a0 g\u00f6rm\u0259diyi<\/p>\n

\u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131 boyda r\u00f6ya.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

t\u0259l\u0259b\u0259lik\u00a0 ill\u0259rin \u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131nla doland\u0131n.<\/p>\n

niy\u0259 bel\u0259 tez ke\u00e7di o \u00fcrp\u0259cik ill\u0259rin.<\/p>\n

k\u00f6rp\u0259 fidan tutmam\u0131\u015f\u00a0 k\u00f6k\u00fcnd\u0259n qopard\u0131lar.<\/p>\n

s\u0259ni\u00a0 he\u00e7 sevm\u0259diyin d\u00fcnyaya apard\u0131r.<\/p>\n

susdun, baxd\u0131n, aldand\u0131n.<\/p>\n

bir \u201cyox!\u201d, dey\u0259 bilmd\u0259in.<\/p>\n

\u00fcsyan ed\u0259 bilm\u0259din.<\/p>\n

\u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131n\u0131 ovcuna s\u0131x\u0131b \u0259r\u0259 yolland\u0131n.<\/p>\n

ki\u00e7ik q\u0131z\u0131 \u0259zdil\u0259r,<\/p>\n

ki\u00e7ik q\u0131z\u0131 \u00fczd\u00fcl\u0259r.<\/p>\n

b\u0259rb\u0259z\u0259kli\u00a0 xal\u0131\u00a0 t\u0259k \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259\u00a0 g\u0259zdil\u0259r.<\/p>\n

\u00e7ay\u00a0 da\u015f\u0131n\u0131 bir s\u0259h\u0259r\u00a0 yast\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131ndan<\/p>\n

gizlic\u0259 g\u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fcl\u0259r.<\/p>\n

ovsunlu bir \u015fey kimi\u00a0 harasa itirdil\u0259r.<\/p>\n

s\u0259n d\u0259 itdin o andan,<\/p>\n

o da\u015f kimi, q\u0131z\u00e7\u0131\u011faz.<\/p>\n

Indi\u00a0 ha a\u011fla, ovun<\/p>\n

h\u0259yat\u00a0 g\u0259mi , q\u0131z\u00e7\u0131\u011faz!<\/p>\n

bu \u00e7irkil, bu qar\u0131\u015f\u0131q\u00a0 h\u0259yat\u0131n\u00a0 girdab\u0131nda.<\/p>\n

s\u0131yr\u0131ld\u0131n , yaraland\u0131n<\/p>\n

ne\u00e7\u0259 tik\u0259, ne\u00e7\u0259 c\u00fcr\u00a0 qumlara par\u00e7aland\u0131n.<\/p>\n

\u0259l\u0259kl\u0259rd\u0259n \u0259l\u0259ndin,<\/p>\n

\u00e7irkablara b\u0259l\u0259ndin.<\/p>\n

\u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131 na\u011f\u0131l\u0131n\u0131,\u00a0 s\u0259n bel\u0259c\u0259 bitirdin.<\/p>\n

\u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131 safl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131-\u00a0 da\u011f selind\u0259 itirdin…<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

Soyuq\u00a0 pay\u0131z s\u0259h\u0259ri.<\/p>\n

\u00c7\u0259n alm\u0131\u015fd\u0131\u00a0 qoynuna<\/p>\n

Bu k\u00fcl\u0259kli \u015f\u0259h\u0259ri.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey \u00fcst-\u00fcst d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

S\u0259nin m\u0259n\u0259 baxma\u011f\u0131n.<\/p>\n

M\u0259nim\u00a0 s\u0259ni g\u00f6rm\u0259yim.<\/p>\n

H\u0259yacana\u00a0 d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259yim.<\/p>\n

S\u0259ssizc\u0259 u\u00e7unma\u011f\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Bir anda vurulma\u011f\u0131m.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey\u00a0 \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

Qa\u015fla\u0131n\u0131n alt\u0131ndan<\/p>\n

O can alan g\u00f6zl\u0259rin.<\/p>\n

Ov\u00e7u, z\u0259rg\u0259r g\u00f6z\u00fcyl\u0259<\/p>\n

O\u011frun-o\u011frun s\u00fczm\u0259yin.<\/p>\n

Kipriyin\u00a0 g\u00f6z\u00fcn \u00fcstd\u0259.<\/p>\n

Yer ald\u0131n\u00a0 g\u00f6z\u00fcm \u00fcst\u0259.<\/p>\n

\u0130z\u00a0 qoydun \u00fcr\u0259yim\u0259,<\/p>\n

Od qoydun k\u00f6z\u00fcm \u00fcstd\u0259.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey \u00fcst-\u00fcstd\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

S\u00f6nd\u00fcr\u00fcl\u0259n\u00a0 i\u015f\u0131qlar.<\/p>\n

K\u00fc\u00e7\u0259d\u0259ki\u00a0 u\u015faqlar.<\/p>\n

Ma\u015f\u0131nlar\u0131n\u00a0 s\u0259sl\u0259ri.<\/p>\n

Ke\u00e7ib ged\u0259n adamlar.<\/p>\n

Toqqu\u015fduq yer\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

\u018flimd\u0259ki\u00a0 kitablar.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

Daranm\u0131\u015f qara telin,<\/p>\n

\u00c7antamdak\u0131 nax\u0131\u015flar.<\/p>\n

O ild\u0131r\u0131m bax\u0131\u015flar<\/p>\n

\u00c7\u0259kib apard\u0131 m\u0259ni,<\/p>\n

Bir divan\u0259\u00a0 d\u00fcnyaya.<\/p>\n

Dadl\u0131 , d\u0259li r\u00f6yaya.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

Sevgisi, \u0259zab\u0131 da,<\/p>\n

G\u00fcnah\u0131 savab\u0131 da.<\/p>\n

O g\u00fcn\u0259d\u0259k nam\u0259lum<\/p>\n

Sual\u0131n cavab\u0131 da.<\/p>\n

S\u0259n\u00a0 idin axtard\u0131\u011f\u0131m<\/p>\n

Qos-qoca \u00f6m\u00fcr boyu.<\/p>\n

O g\u00fcn sanki na\u011f\u0131ld\u0131.<\/p>\n

B\u00fctn d\u00fcnya da\u011f\u0131ld\u0131.<\/p>\n

Yeni\u00a0 h\u0259yat ba\u015flad\u0131.<\/p>\n

\u0130ki\u00a0 \u00fcr\u0259k qovu\u015fdu…<\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey \u00fcst-\u00fcst\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fc.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

yana\u011f\u0131na axan ya\u015fam<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

yana\u011f\u0131na axan ya\u015fa –<\/p>\n

b\u00fct\u00fcn d\u00fcnyan\u0131 ver\u0259rdim.<\/p>\n

ya\u00a0 m\u0259nim\u00e7\u00fcn\u00a0 a\u011flamad\u0131n,<\/p>\n

ya g\u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 ya\u015f olmad\u0131.<\/p>\n

b\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 s\u0259n\u0259 ver\u0259c\u0259k<\/p>\n

m\u0259nim bir d\u00fcnyam olmad\u0131.<\/p>\n

s\u0259ni\u00a0 s\u0259nd\u0259n almaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn-<\/p>\n

\u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc b\u00fct\u00f6v ver\u0259rdim.<\/p>\n

ya s\u0259nd\u0259 bir\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cS\u0259n\u201dolmad\u0131,<\/p>\n

ya m\u0259n tam, but\u00f6v olmad\u0131m.<\/p>\n

s\u0259n\u0259,\u00a0 s\u0259n\u0259 \u00e7atmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn<\/p>\n

b\u00fct\u00fcn yollar\u0131 d\u0259n\u0259rdim.<\/p>\n

ya s\u0259n yolun sonundayd\u0131n,<\/p>\n

ya m\u0259n yolumu azm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m.<\/p>\n

m\u0259ni\u00a0 \u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn\u0259 sevib,<\/p>\n

sevm\u0259ni bel\u0259 bilm\u0259dim.<\/p>\n

ya sevm\u0259yi bacarmad\u0131n,<\/p>\n

ya he\u00e7 sevm\u0259k ist\u0259m\u0259din.<\/p>\n

yanana yanarlar,\u00a0 dedim!<\/p>\n

b\u0259lk\u0259 yand\u0131n, \u00a0m\u0259n g\u00f6rm\u0259dim.<\/p>\n

n\u0259 \u00e7\u0131xard\u0131n h\u0259yat\u0131ndan,<\/p>\n

n\u0259 birl\u0259\u015fm\u0259y\u0259 c\u0259hd etdin.<\/p>\n

\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc \u00fcz\u00fcb danlama.<\/p>\n

ac\u0131\u00a0 so\u011fan soyar kimi<\/p>\n

bir g\u00fcn dolarsa g\u00f6zl\u0259rin,<\/p>\n

bu h\u0259yat\u0131n ac\u0131s\u0131ndan.<\/p>\n

buluddan o yana\u011f\u0131na<\/p>\n

bir damla ya\u015f s\u00fcz\u00fcl\u0259rs\u0259.<\/p>\n

s\u0259ni\u00a0 uzaqdan uza\u011fa<\/p>\n

sevm\u0259y\u0259 bel\u0259 d\u0259y\u0259rmi\u015f.<\/p>\n

o\u00a0 ya\u015fdan savay d\u00fcnyada –<\/p>\n

sanaram\u00a0 h\u0259r \u015fey h\u0259d\u0259rmi\u015f.<\/p>\n

q\u0259m el\u0259m\u0259, gec\u0259g\u00f6z\u00fcm!<\/p>\n

yana\u011f\u0131ndan axan ya\u015fam.<\/p>\n

heyif,\u00a0 \u00f6m\u00fcr \u00f6t\u00fcb ke\u00e7di.<\/p>\n

art\u0131q gecdi…<\/p>\n

n\u0259 f\u0259rq ed\u0259r?<\/p>\n

m\u0259n ki can\u0131mdan bezmi\u015f\u0259m…<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

***<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Dolub g\u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259 ulduzlar qum kimi,<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Yatma\u011fa qoymazlar gec\u0259ni.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00d6mr\u00fcmd\u0259n \u00f6mrun\u0259 axan bir ulduz,<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00c7a\u011f\u0131rar s\u0259ni sev\u0259ni.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u018fynim\u0259 geydiyim paltar t\u0259k <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 t\u0259mas\u0131n isid\u0259r m\u0259ni.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

G\u0259l gec\u0259 ,<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 g\u0259l, ulduz\u00a0 i\u015f\u0131\u011f\u0131n <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00e7il\u0259nsin \u00fcz\u00fcm\u0259,g\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259.<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Canland\u0131r s\u0259nsiz bu \u00f6l\u00fc,<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 bu ruhsuz b\u0259d\u0259n<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

qovu\u015fmayan e\u015fql\u0259r m\u0259sud<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

bu da bel\u0259 al\u0131n yaz\u0131…
\nn\u0259 \u201cunutma!, dey\u0259 bildim,
\nn\u0259 d\u0259, unut…
\nsevgi biziml\u0259 \u0259n az\u0131.<\/p>\n

qovu\u015fmayan e\u015fql\u0259r m\u0259sud.
\nsevgi biziml\u0259 \u0259n az\u0131.
\ni\u00e7imizd\u0259…
\nvalla, billa!
\nkirl\u0259nm\u0259mi\u015f, paslanmam\u0131\u015f,
\ntoz tutmam\u0131\u015f.
\nadil\u0259\u015fib bezdirm\u0259mi\u015f.
\nh\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 t\u0259r, o t\u0259rt\u0259miz<\/p>\n

o \u0259l\u00e7atmaz.
\nuzaq, ya\u015f\u0131l ada kimi.
\ns\u0259nin kimi, m\u0259nim kimi.
\nya\u015fam q\u0259d\u0259r \u015firin, \u0259ziz.
\nac\u0131, q\u0259ddar \u00f6lum kimi.
\nevlilik n\u0259?!
\nz\u00fcl\u00fcm kimi….
\n\u0259vv\u0259l-\u0259vv\u0259l l\u0259ziz, dadl\u0131.<\/p>\n

yem\u0259k kimi…
\nsonra\u00a0 z\u0259h\u0259r, tur\u015f, g\u00f6yn\u0259d\u0259n<\/p>\n

n\u0259m\u0259k kimi…
\ng\u0259lir adil\u0259\u015fm\u0259 fonu.
\nsonra m\u0259i\u015f\u0259t, zir-zibil.
\nsonra says\u0131z probleml\u0259r.
\nyerli-yersiz s\u00f6z sohb\u0259tl\u0259r.
\nsonra nifr\u0259t.
\nyox!
\ndem\u0259yim, burda duraq!
\nsonlu\u011fu yox<\/p>\n

tragikomik
\ne\u015fq filmifason, t\u0259h\u0259r…<\/p>\n

he\u00e7 \u00fcz\u00fclm\u0259, ciy\u0259rparam!<\/p>\n

s\u0259n d\u0259 sa\u011fsan, m\u0259n d\u0259 sa\u011fam.
\nm\u0259ni a\u011flinda h\u0259p bel\u0259
\nvuruldu\u011fun g\u00fcn kimi tut.
\ninan m\u0259n\u0259, can\u0131m g\u00f6z\u00fcm!
\nqovu\u015fmayan e\u015fqler m\u0259sud.
\nqovushmayan e\u015fql\u0259r m\u0259sud.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00f6z\u00fc \u015feir olan q\u0131z<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

sa\u00e7\u0131na pay\u0131z hopub<\/p>\n

r\u00fczgar h\u00fccum eyl\u0259yib.<\/p>\n

a\u011f \u00f6rp\u0259yin ba\u015f\u0131nda<\/p>\n

\u00f6z\u00fc duman olan q\u0131z.<\/p>\n

i\u00e7ind\u0259 \u00fcmidl\u0259rin<\/p>\n

tufan\u0131n qorxusundan<\/p>\n

ba\u015f qald\u0131rmaz,utanqac…<\/p>\n

n\u0259 yatm\u0131san , oyan q\u0131z!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

f\u0259sill\u0259r d\u0259 q\u0131sqanar<\/p>\n

o\u00a0 t\u0259rt\u0259miz ruhunu.<\/p>\n

g\u00f6rm\u00fcrs\u0259n ne\u00e7\u0259 vaxtd\u0131<\/p>\n

al\u0131\u015f\u0131b-yan\u0131r pay\u0131z.<\/p>\n

ax\u0131 neyl\u0259sin pay\u0131z?!<\/p>\n

k\u00fcl\u0259kl\u0259r s\u0259n\u00e7\u00fcn \u0259s\u0259r.<\/p>\n

mehtab s\u0259nd\u0259n utanar.<\/p>\n

duman s\u0259nin\u00e7\u00fcn \u00e7\u00f6k\u0259r.<\/p>\n

\u015feh g\u00fcl\u0259 s\u0259n\u00e7\u00fcn damar.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

g\u00f6yd\u0259 bir ulduz tutdun.<\/p>\n

parlamad\u0131 ulduzun.<\/p>\n

t\u0259bi\u0259t palitrand\u0131.<\/p>\n

g\u00f6y\u00a0 qur\u015fa\u0131\u011f\u0131 s\u0259nindi.<\/p>\n

indi\u00a0 se\u00e7 \u00a0\u00f6z r\u0259ngini.<\/p>\n

k\u0259tan, boya, f\u0131r\u00e7alar\u2026<\/p>\n

\u00e7\u0259k leysan\u0131n \u015f\u0259klini.<\/p>\n

ild\u0131r\u0131m ax\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131<\/p>\n

n\u0259f\u0259sini\u00a0 ayaz\u0131n.<\/p>\n

\u00e7\u0259k\u00a0 x\u0259zan\u0131n r\u0259ngini<\/p>\n

ac\u0131\u011f\u0131na pay\u0131z\u0131n.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00f6z kitab ota\u011f\u0131nda.<\/p>\n

roman \u00a0r\u0259sm d\u00fcnyanda.<\/p>\n

film n\u0259\u011fm\u0259 \u00a0tablonda<\/p>\n

k\u0259d\u0259rli, \u00a0t\u0259nha, yalq\u0131z…<\/p>\n

s\u0259n\u0259 n\u0259 olsun arzum<\/p>\n

bahar kimi qalan q\u0131z?!<\/p>\n

s\u0259n\u0259 n\u0259 \u015feir yaz\u0131m<\/p>\n

\u00f6z\u00fc \u015feir olan q\u0131z…<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

qorxuram<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

qorxuram leysan basa.
\nsel apara\u2026qorxuram!
\nqorxuram \u015fim\u015f\u0259k \u00e7axa
\nod k\u00fcl ola\u2026 qorxuram!
\nqorxuram aq\u0131l susa.
\n\u00fcr\u0259k s\u0259hv yerd\u0259 dura.
\nIt\u0259 s\u0259ssiz huzurum.
\na\u00e7\u0131la yeni yaram.
\ns\u0259ni sevm\u0259kd\u0259n d\u0259 \u00e7ox.
\ns\u0259ni he\u00e7 sevm\u0259yi yox.
\nhe\u00e7 \u00f6z\u00fcm d\u0259 bilm\u0259d\u0259n.
\nhe\u00e7 oz\u00fcm hiss etm\u0259d\u0259n.
\ns\u0259n\u0259,\u00a0 ay do\u011fma-yad\u0131m.
\n\u00f6yr\u0259\u015fm\u0259kd\u0259n qorxuram.
\n\u00f6yr\u0259\u015fm\u0259kd\u0259n qorxuram…<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u0259hv el\u0259 m\u0259ni!<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

uzaq durma!
\ns\u0259nd\u0259n min il
\nmin bi \u015f\u0259h\u0259r<\/p>\n

min gec\u0259<\/p>\n

min a\u00e7\u0131lan s\u0259h\u0259r<\/p>\n

uzaq olsam da
\noxunmami\u015f \u015feir kimi
\nyazdi\u011f\u0131m h\u0259r bir s\u0259tird\u0259
\n\u0259kgiyim g\u00fcld\u0259 \u00e7ic\u0259kd\u0259
\nk\u0259\u015ff el\u0259 m\u0259ni!
\ng\u00fcnl\u0259r, aylar, ill\u0259r kecir
\nqollar ba\u011fli,
\nyollar ba\u011fli
\nur\u0259k titr\u0259k n\u0259f\u0259s kimi<\/p>\n

ba\u011fl\u0131, d\u0259mir q\u0259f\u0259s kimi
\nq\u0131rammad\u0131m
\ng\u0259l\u0259mm\u0259dim
\n\u0259hv el\u0259 m\u0259ni!…<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

ya sonra<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

sonra da \u0259lin\u0259 toxundu \u0259lim.
\n\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc \u00fcz\u00fcmd\u0259 m\u0259n hiss el\u0259dim.<\/p>\n

sonra\u2026<\/p>\n

ondan ke\u00e7\u0259n oda al\u0131\u015fhd\u0131m.
\nsonra ildirim t\u0259k \u00f6mrum\u0259 \u00e7axd\u0131.
\nsonra da…
\nsonra da ya\u011fdi ya\u011f\u0131\u015flar.
\no adl\u0131 leysana, sel\u0259 qar\u0131\u015fd\u0131m.
\nya sonra?!
\nsonras\u0131 n\u0259 olsun, bildiyin \u015feyl\u0259r
\ntufandan sonrak\u0131 s\u00fcstl\u0259 bar\u0131\u015fd\u0131m…<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

X\u0259b\u0259rimiz yox<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

D\u00f6y\u00fc\u015f al\u0131na yaz\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131.
\nD\u00f6y\u00fc\u015fd\u0259n x\u0259b\u0259rimiz yox.
\n\u018fsir d\u00fc\u015f\u0259n ah-nal\u0259d\u0259n
\nS\u00f6y\u00fc\u015fd\u0259n x\u0259b\u0259rimiz yox.<\/p>\n

\u0130nsan o\u011flu h\u0259ddin a\u015f\u0131b.
\nN\u0259fsin\u0259 qul, yolun \u00e7a\u015f\u0131b.
\n\u015eeytan Allahla bar\u0131\u015f\u0131b
\nG\u00f6r\u00fc\u015fd\u0259n x\u0259b\u0259rimiz yox.<\/p>\n

\u00d6z xa\u00e7\u0131n da\u015f\u0131yan \u0130sa.
\nG\u00fcn \u00e7\u0131xa, a\u00e7\u0131la sabah.
\n\u00d6l\u00fcm,\u00a0 yoxsa yeni\u00a0 ya\u015fam.
\nD\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fd\u0259n\u00a0 x\u0259b\u0259rimiz yox…<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Yuxu<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

T\u0259yyar\u0259miz d\u00fc\u015f\u0259r sular \u00fcst\u00fcn\u0259.<\/p>\n

Somsoyuq bir d\u0259niz al\u0131\u015far, yanar.<\/p>\n

Tarixin\u00a0 t\u0259k\u0259ri\u00a0 f\u0131rlanar yen\u0259.<\/p>\n

Qara qutudan da qara s\u0259s \u00e7\u0131xar.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Bir kims\u0259 anlamaz n\u0259dir ba\u015f ver\u0259n.<\/p>\n

Y\u0259ni\u00a0 anlama\u011fa vaxt\u0131 da olmaz.<\/p>\n

S\u0259p\u0259l\u0259n\u0259r\u00a0 suya\u00a0 yanar\u00a0 tik\u0259l\u0259r.<\/p>\n

Burda\u00a0 torpaq yoxdu,\u00a0 q\u0259bir\u00a0 qaz\u0131lmaz.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Su p\u0259risi il\u0259 r\u0259qs ed\u0259r ruhum.<\/p>\n

B\u0259d\u0259nim yem olar\u00a0 a\u011f bal\u0131qlara.<\/p>\n

Sa\u011f\u00a0 ik\u0259n\u00a0 uzaqdan g\u0259l\u0259rdi qoxum.<\/p>\n

Rayih\u0259m\u00a0 qar\u0131\u015far duzlu sulara.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Sa\u00e7\u0131ma\u00a0 ili\u015f\u0259r ya\u015f\u0131l yosunlar.<\/p>\n

M\u0259rcan \u00a0qula\u011f\u0131ma s\u0131r\u011falar taxar.<\/p>\n

R\u0259ngar\u0259ng\u00a0 bal\u0131qlar seyr\u0259 dayanar.<\/p>\n

Bir d\u0259niz ulduzu\u00a0 uzaqdan baxar.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Sanki\u00a0 \u00e7a\u015far qalar bu yerd\u0259 b\u0259\u015f\u0259r.<\/p>\n

Uzaqda\u00a0 n\u0259 h\u0259yat, n\u0259 ev g\u00f6r\u00fcn\u0259r.<\/p>\n

El\u0259 bil yerl\u0259\u00a0 g\u00f6y burda \u00f6p\u00fc\u015f\u0259r.<\/p>\n

D\u00fcnya bir masmavi\u00a0 d\u0259niz\u0259 d\u00f6n\u0259r.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Bu nec\u0259 al\u0259mdi\u00a0 ili\u015fib qald\u0131m.<\/p>\n

Niy\u0259 gec\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259z, a\u00e7\u0131lmaz sabah.<\/p>\n

Dem\u0259 r\u00f6ya\u00a0 imi\u015f\u00a0 bird\u0259n oyand\u0131m.<\/p>\n

N\u0259 yax\u015f\u0131\u00a0 sa\u011fm\u0131\u015fam, sa\u011fm\u0131\u015fam, Allah!!!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

He\u00e7 n\u0259 dem\u0259!<\/strong><\/p>\n

H\u0259r \u015fey bamba\u015fqa d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcy\u00fcmd\u0259n.
\nH\u0259r \u015fey f\u0259rqli arzulad\u0131\u011f\u0131mdan.
\nH\u0259r \u015fey ke\u00e7ici, fani.
\nSanki he\u00e7 n\u0259 olmam\u0131\u015f kimi.
\nN\u0259 m\u0259n s\u0259ni sevmi\u015f,
\nN\u0259 s\u0259n m\u0259n\u0259 yenid\u0259n vurulmu\u015f.
\nH\u0259r \u015fey b\u00fct\u00f6l\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fc itirmi\u015f,
\nH\u0259r \u015fey yar\u0131m.
\nN\u0259 x\u0259st\u0259 kimi x\u0259st\u0259,
\nN\u0259 sa\u011flam kimi sa\u011flam.
\n\u018fs\u0259bl\u0259r tar\u0131m…
\nSonu b\u0259lli olmayan yolda
\nTutu\u015fmu\u015f k\u00f6z,
\nQara tukan \u00fcstd\u0259
\nY\u00fcr\u00fcy\u00fcr ayaqlar\u0131m…
\nDem\u0259!
\nHe\u00e7 n\u0259 dem\u0259!
\nToxunsan?!
\nToxunsan , \u00fcsyan ed\u0259r duy\u011fular\u0131m…<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

L\u0259nk\u0259ran<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

yolboyu \u015f\u00fct\u00fcy\u0259n
\n\u0259cn\u0259bi ma\u015f\u0131nlar olmasa.
\nuzaqdan gorun\u0259n
\nyamya\u015fil tali\u015f da\u011flari.<\/p>\n

k\u0259ndl\u0259r bir-birin\u0259<\/p>\n

sanki k\u0259ndirl\u0259 ba\u011flanm\u0131\u015f.
\nh\u0259r h\u0259y\u0259tin \u00f6z bi\u00e7imi,
\n\u00e7ic\u0259kl\u0259ri, g\u00fcll\u0259ri.<\/p>\n

hasarlar\u0131. \u00e7\u0259p\u0259rl\u0259ri
\ngombulca t\u0259ndirl\u0259ri.<\/p>\n

narlngi, feyxoa, limon<\/p>\n

sitrus meyv\u0259 ba\u011flar\u0131<\/p>\n

q\u0131rm\u0131z\u0131 k\u0259rpic, b\u0259dke\u015fli<\/p>\n

na\u011f\u0131l kimi evl\u0259ri.<\/p>\n

bi ba\u015fqa d\u00fcnya
\nbir al\u0259m…
\nke\u00e7mi\u015f\u0259 s\u0259yah\u0259tdi sanki
\nVeravul pal\u0131dlari,
\nSeparadi s\u0259rvl\u0259ri…<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ruhun t\u0259labat\u0131<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

M\u00fcbariz\u0259\u00a0 gedir\u00a0 \u00e7ox vaxt i\u00e7imd\u0259.<\/p>\n

Yazmaqla, yazmamaq m\u00fcbariz\u0259si.<\/p>\n

Bu davadan bezir b\u0259z\u0259n i\u00e7im d\u0259.<\/p>\n

A\u011fl\u0131m k\u0259s\u0259 bilmir q\u0259lbimin s\u0259sin.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131b bo\u015fal\u0131ram, sakitl\u0259\u015fir\u0259m.<\/p>\n

F\u0259rqi yox – olmas\u0131n birc\u0259 oxucum.<\/p>\n

He\u00e7\u00a0 vaxt\u00a0 s\u00f6yl\u0259mir\u0259m-\u201dm\u0259n d\u0259 \u015fair\u0259m!\u201d<\/p>\n

Yazmaq \u00f6z-\u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 hesab\u0131m, borcum.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Eyb\u00a0 etm\u0259z, \u00e7\u0131xmas\u0131n q\u0259zet, jurnalda.<\/p>\n

M\u0259ni\u00a0 tan\u0131mas\u0131n bir n\u0259f\u0259r bel\u0259.<\/p>\n

Yazm\u0131ram oxuna, yaz\u0131ram qala.<\/p>\n

\u0130st\u0259mir\u0259m d\u00fc\u015f\u0259m dil\u0259-a\u011f\u0131za.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Kims\u0259y\u0259 mane\u0259 olmur ki, \u015feirim.<\/p>\n

Kims\u0259nin yerini\u00a0 dar etmir\u0259m ki?!
\nYaz\u0131b, yazmamaqda \u00f6z d\u0259rdi-s\u0259rim.<\/p>\n

Bu d\u0259rdl\u0259 ya\u015famaq asand\u0131 sanki…<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

N\u0259 t\u0259rif, n\u0259 d\u0259 ki,\u00a0 yalan\u00e7\u0131 \u015f\u00f6hr\u0259t,<\/p>\n

G\u0259r\u0259k deyil m\u0259n\u0259 b\u0259zil\u0259ri\u00a0 t\u0259k.<\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131rsam, dem\u0259li bu da bir qism\u0259t,<\/p>\n

Tanr\u0131 yaz\u0131s\u0131ndan qa\u00e7\u0131lmaz dem\u0259k.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Yazanlar art\u0131qca g\u00f6b\u0259l\u0259k kimi,<\/p>\n

Kim\u0259 m\u0259cburiyy\u0259t, d\u0259rs\u00a0 saat\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n

M\u0259n\u0259 n\u0259f\u0259s kimi, su i\u00e7m\u0259k kimi<\/p>\n

Ruhumun g\u00fcnd\u0259lik t\u0259labat\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Yazm\u0131\u015fam, yaz\u0131ram, yen\u0259 yazacam.<\/p>\n

M\u0259ni \u00f6z i\u00e7imd\u0259n ay\u0131ra bilm\u0259z.<\/p>\n

\u018flimd\u0259n q\u0259l\u0259mi, ruhumdan \u015feiri,<\/p>\n

Dilimd\u0259n\u00a0 s\u00f6zl\u0259ri qopara bilm\u0259z<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131ya 1484 d\u0259f\u0259 bax\u0131l\u0131b<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0   \u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131, g\u00f6z\u00fcn ya\u015f\u0131 ax\u0131b, ax\u0131b\u00a0 qurtard\u0131. \u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131 q\u0259d\u0259r d\u0259rdin b\u00fct\u00fcn d\u00fcnyan\u0131 tutdu. arzun\u00a0 vard\u0131 \u00e7ox deyil, ki\u00e7ik \u00e7ay da\u015f\u0131 boyda. g\u0259ncliyinin \u0259n t\u0259miz , […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[15,3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7267"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7267"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7267\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7284,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7267\/revisions\/7284"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7267"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7267"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7267"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}