{"id":7675,"date":"2015-01-15T15:49:10","date_gmt":"2015-01-15T11:49:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=7675"},"modified":"2015-01-15T15:49:10","modified_gmt":"2015-01-15T11:49:10","slug":"n%c9%99rmin-kamal-bayram-ucun-h%c9%99diyy%c9%99-t%c9%99klifim","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=7675","title":{"rendered":"N\u0259rmin Kamal — Bayram \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn h\u0259diyy\u0259 t\u0259klifim"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"n\u0259rmin<\/a><\/p>\n

Az\u0259rbaycan\u0131 b\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fc\u015f \u015fidd\u0259t, vurmaq, d\u00f6ym\u0259k, hirsl\u0259nib \u00f6ld\u00fcrm\u0259k, bir s\u00f6zl\u0259, jurnalistl\u0259r demi\u015fk\u0259n, m\u0259i\u015f\u0259t zorak\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131na bu yaz\u0131mla bir azca k\u00f6m\u0259k etm\u0259k ist\u0259rdim. Odur ki, siz\u0259 bir bayram h\u0259diyy\u0259si t\u0259klifim var.<\/p>\n

G\u00fcn boyu c\u00fcrb\u0259c\u00fcr i\u015fl\u0259r g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u00fck. Bu i\u015fl\u0259ri g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcm\u00fcz vaxt beynimizd\u0259 bir andan da q\u0131sa s\u00fcr\u0259n \u015fim\u015f\u0259kl\u0259r \u015faqq\u0131lday\u0131r; bug\u00fcnk\u00fc h\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131za aid olmayan ke\u00e7mi\u015fd\u0259n, \u0259n \u00e7ox da u\u015faql\u0131qdan epizodlar parlay\u0131b s\u00f6n\u00fcr: k\u0259d\u0259rli, sevincli, neytral.<\/p>\n

Biz c\u00fcrb\u0259c\u00fcr xo\u015fag\u0259lm\u0259z v\u0259ziyy\u0259tl\u0259rin q\u0259hr\u0259man\u0131 da, qurban\u0131 da olmu\u015fuq. Realist insanlar yadda\u015f\u0131n v\u0259 \u015f\u00fcuralt\u0131n\u0131n bu oyunlar\u0131na he\u00e7 bir s\u0259lahiyy\u0259t vermirl\u0259r. Lap ist\u0259yir o \u015fim\u015f\u0259kl\u0259r g\u00fcnd\u0259 on d\u0259f\u0259 \u00e7axs\u0131n. Ham\u0131 bunu bacarm\u0131r.<\/p>\n

\u018fn \u00e7\u0259tini is\u0259 odur ki, ba\u015fqalar\u0131 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u015fim\u015f\u0259kl\u0259rin yaranma an\u0131na \u00f6z g\u00f6z\u00fcnl\u0259 \u015fahid olursan.<\/p>\n

Y\u0259ni m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n bax\u0131rsan, bir ki\u015finin u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n\u0131 vurdu\u011funu, u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n yer\u0259 y\u0131x\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131, ki\u015finin onu yerd\u0259 qoyub hirsl\u0259 yolun sonunacan t\u0259k getdiyini, t\u0259z\u0259d\u0259n qay\u0131d\u0131b u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 quca\u011f\u0131na g\u00f6t\u00fcrd\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fc, \u00f6pd\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcrs\u0259n.<\/p>\n

O u\u015faq b\u00f6y\u00fcy\u00fcb hardasa i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k, i\u015f yerind\u0259 iclas vaxt\u0131 bird\u0259n bu hadis\u0259 onun \u015fim\u015f\u0259yi olacaq. S\u0259ns\u0259 o u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259k \u015fim\u015f\u0259yini indid\u0259n g\u00f6r\u00fcrs\u0259n.<\/p>\n

U\u015faqlarla, g\u0259ncl\u0259rl\u0259 m\u00fcnasib\u0259t bu n\u00f6qt\u0259d\u0259n baxanda \u00e7\u0259tindir. S\u0259nin, yaxud \u00f6z ata-anas\u0131n\u0131n, dost-tan\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131n hans\u0131sa h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259ti, s\u00f6z\u00fc, \u015fill\u0259si, t\u0259piyi onun \u015fim\u015f\u0259yin\u0259 \u00e7evril\u0259r, h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131n h\u0259r t\u0259r\u0259fin\u0259 s\u0259p\u0259l\u0259n\u0259 bil\u0259r. Ehtiyatl\u0131 olmaq laz\u0131md\u0131r. Biziml\u0259 ehtiyatl\u0131 olmay\u0131blar.<\/p>\n

Bir adam\u0131n evin\u0259 girm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn qap\u0131n\u0131n z\u0259ngini bas\u0131ram, o qap\u0131n\u0131 a\u00e7ana q\u0259d\u0259r yaranan bir ne\u00e7\u0259 anl\u0131q fasil\u0259d\u0259 20-25 il \u0259vv\u0259l yan\u0131mda bir-biril\u0259 canavarlar kimi bo\u011fu\u015fmu\u015f bak\u0131l\u0131 ki\u015fil\u0259r beynimd\u0259 parlay\u0131b s\u00f6n\u00fcr.<\/p>\n

Evd\u0259 bir-birin\u0259 dola\u015fm\u0131\u015f iki kabeli ay\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131m vaxt 25 il \u0259vv\u0259l m\u00fc\u0259llimin x\u0259rit\u0259 g\u00f6st\u0259r\u0259n \u00e7ubuqla m\u0259kt\u0259b o\u011flanlar\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6ym\u0259si s\u0259hn\u0259si m\u0259nim \u015fim\u015f\u0259yim olur.<\/p>\n

U\u015fa\u011f\u0131 d\u00f6ym\u0259m\u0259k haqq\u0131nda y\u00fcz c\u00fcr qanun madd\u0259si var bizim \u00f6lk\u0259mizd\u0259 d\u0259, d\u00fcnyada da. \u0130ndi m\u0259kt\u0259bd\u0259 u\u015faq d\u00f6ym\u0259k dem\u0259k olar ki, qalmay\u0131b. Evl\u0259rd\u0259 is\u0259 oldu\u011fu kimi qal\u0131r.<\/p>\n

U\u015fa\u011f\u0131n\u0131 \u015fill\u0259l\u0259yib \u015f\u0259xsiyy\u0259tini s\u0131nd\u0131ran kim, u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n\u0131n ba\u015f\u0131n\u0131 divara vurub s\u0131nd\u0131ran kim, onu d\u00f6ym\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn x\u00fcsusi sifari\u015f verib nar \u00e7ubu\u011fu g\u0259tizdir\u0259n kim. Qanun u\u015fa\u011f\u0131n \u201c\u015fim\u015f\u0259kl\u0259r\u201d-ini \u00f6z ata-anas\u0131ndan daha \u00e7ox fikirl\u0259\u015fir. U\u015fa\u011fa qapaz vursan\u0131z, \u0259lb\u0259tt\u0259, o \u0259lind\u0259ki on be\u015finci \u015fokolad\u0131 yem\u0259yib siz\u0259 qaytaracaq. Amma o qapaz\u0131 \u00f6mr\u00fc boyu \u00f6z\u00fcnd\u0259 saxlayacaq.<\/p>\n

Biz u\u015fa\u011f\u0131 vuranda onun d\u00fcnyas\u0131 bunu nec\u0259 qavray\u0131r? T\u0259s\u0259vv\u00fcr edin ki, sizd\u0259n \u00fc\u00e7 d\u0259f\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fck, g\u00fccl\u00fc adam \u00fcst\u00fcn\u00fcz\u0259 g\u0259lib sizi vurur, m\u00f6hk\u0259m q\u0131\u015fq\u0131r\u0131r. \u0130ndi is\u0259 t\u0259s\u0259vv\u00fcr edin ki, siz o adamdan bir qab yem\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn, isti ev \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn, t\u0259miz pal-paltar \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn as\u0131l\u0131s\u0131n\u0131z. Siz bu d\u00fcnya haqda h\u0259r \u015feyi o adamdan \u00f6yr\u0259nmisiniz.<\/p>\n

Dem\u0259li, ondan hirsl\u0259n\u0259n vaxt vurmaqdan ba\u015fqa bir yol tapmama\u011f\u0131 da \u00f6yr\u0259n\u0259c\u0259ksiniz!<\/p>\n

Hirsl\u0259n\u0259nd\u0259 adam\u0131n \u0259li robot kim, mexaniki qur\u011fu kimi havaya qalx\u0131r, dili pis s\u00f6zl\u0259r dem\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flay\u0131r. B\u0259zi psixologiya m\u0259nb\u0259l\u0259ri hirsin genderind\u0259n yaz\u0131r, guya ki\u015fil\u0259r fiziki, qad\u0131nlarsa verbal aqressiyaya meylli t\u0259rbiy\u0259 olunurlar.<\/p>\n

\u00dcmumiyy\u0259tl\u0259, tibb aliml\u0259ri yaz\u0131rlar: hirsl\u0259n\u0259n vaxt hormonlar v\u0259 neyrotransmitterl\u0259r b\u0259d\u0259nimizin i\u00e7ind\u0259 \u015f\u0259lal\u0259 kimi ax\u0131r.<\/p>\n

Onlar qollar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n \u0259z\u0259l\u0259l\u0259rini g\u0259rir, n\u0259bzi s\u00fcr\u0259tl\u0259 vurdurur. H\u0259min vaxt sakit qalmaq \u00e7\u0259tinl\u0259\u015fir, \u00e7\u00fcnki b\u00fct\u00fcn bunlar\u0131n yaratd\u0131\u011f\u0131 t\u0259zyiq mexaniki qur\u011fu kimi s\u0259nd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xma\u011fa bir yol axtar\u0131r.<\/p>\n

Ancaq s\u0259n dem\u0259, o m\u0259\u015fhur fikir s\u0259hv imi\u015f ki, hirsimizi \u00e7\u0131xarmal\u0131y\u0131q, vurmaq, s\u0131nd\u0131rmaq d\u00fcz\u0259ldir, yoxsa \u00fcr\u0259yimiz partlayar, sakitl\u0259\u015f\u0259 bilm\u0259rik. H\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131 bu m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259ni ara\u015fd\u0131rma\u011fa h\u0259sr ed\u0259n a\u011f\u0131ll\u0131 adamlar bunun tam \u0259ksin\u0259 oldu\u011funu yaz\u0131rlar.<\/p>\n

Hirsimizi \u201cifad\u0259\u201d etm\u0259k, m\u0259\u015fhur fikrin \u0259ksin\u0259, bizi sakitl\u0259\u015fdirmir. Hirsimizi ifad\u0259 etm\u0259k bizi daha da hirsli edir!<\/p>\n

\u00dcst\u0259lik, o adam\u0131 incidir, qorxudur, hirsl\u0259ndirir, m\u00fcnasib\u0259ti pozur, bizim ist\u0259m\u0259diyimiz n\u0259tic\u0259l\u0259r verir, \u00e7\u00fcnki hirsi \u201cifad\u0259 etm\u0259k\u201d konstruktiv deyil. Hirsl\u0259nm\u0259k normald\u0131r, ham\u0131m\u0131zda ged\u0259n proses t\u0259xmin\u0259n eynidir, h\u0259min vaxt \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc nec\u0259 aparmaq bizi f\u0259rql\u0259ndirir.<\/p>\n

Hirsl\u0259nm\u0259k \u00f6z-\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc \u00e7oxald\u0131r. M\u0259sl\u0259h\u0259t verirl\u0259r ki, hirsl\u0259nm\u0259y\u0259 ba\u015flayan kimi bunu hiss edib daxili limit qoymaq laz\u0131md\u0131r: \u201cBu hirsim\u0259 ba\u015f qo\u015fub n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r uza\u011fa ged\u0259 bil\u0259r\u0259m\u201d.<\/p>\n

Gecik\u0259nd\u0259 idar\u0259 el\u0259m\u0259k d\u0259 \u00e7\u0259tinl\u0259\u015fir. Hirsin \u00fczr\u0259 h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259t etm\u0259kd\u0259ns\u0259, hirsin\u0259 qarn\u0131n\u0131n quruldamas\u0131na qulaq asd\u0131\u011f\u0131n kimi qulaq asmal\u0131san.<\/p>\n

Yollar \u00e7oxdur, m\u0259sl\u0259h\u0259tl\u0259r \u00e7oxdur, h\u0259r\u0259 hirsi idar\u0259 etm\u0259yin \u00f6z\u00fc \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259n yolunu tapmal\u0131d\u0131r, d\u00f6ym\u0259y\u0259, vurma\u011fa, q\u0131\u015fq\u0131rma\u011fa alternativ axtar\u0131b tapmal\u0131d\u0131r.<\/p>\n

Bayrama h\u0259diyy\u0259 tapmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn x\u00fcsusi olaraq \u00e7\u0131x\u0131b axtard\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131z kimi axtarmal\u0131d\u0131r. Budur, daha bir \u015fim\u015f\u0259k: a\u011f\u0131r b\u00fcllur k\u00fclqab\u0131 havada u\u00e7ur.<\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131ya 743 d\u0259f\u0259 bax\u0131l\u0131b<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Az\u0259rbaycan\u0131 b\u00fcr\u00fcm\u00fc\u015f \u015fidd\u0259t, vurmaq, d\u00f6ym\u0259k, hirsl\u0259nib \u00f6ld\u00fcrm\u0259k, bir s\u00f6zl\u0259, jurnalistl\u0259r demi\u015fk\u0259n, m\u0259i\u015f\u0259t zorak\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131na bu yaz\u0131mla bir azca k\u00f6m\u0259k etm\u0259k ist\u0259rdim. Odur ki, siz\u0259 bir bayram h\u0259diyy\u0259si t\u0259klifim var. G\u00fcn boyu c\u00fcrb\u0259c\u00fcr i\u015fl\u0259r g\u00f6r\u00fcr\u00fck. Bu i\u015fl\u0259ri g\u00f6rd\u00fcy\u00fcm\u00fcz vaxt beynimizd\u0259 bir andan da q\u0131sa s\u00fcr\u0259n \u015fim\u015f\u0259kl\u0259r \u015faqq\u0131lday\u0131r; bug\u00fcnk\u00fc h\u0259yat\u0131m\u0131za aid olmayan ke\u00e7mi\u015fd\u0259n, \u0259n \u00e7ox da u\u015faql\u0131qdan epizodlar […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[6],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7675"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7675"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7675\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7676,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7675\/revisions\/7676"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7675"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7675"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7675"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}