{"id":8428,"date":"2015-02-24T15:39:15","date_gmt":"2015-02-24T11:39:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=8428"},"modified":"2015-02-24T15:39:15","modified_gmt":"2015-02-24T11:39:15","slug":"nadin-qordimer-evim-afrika-idi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/?p=8428","title":{"rendered":"Nadin Qordimer: “… evim Afrika idi.”"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"unnamed\"<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0C\u0259nubi Afrikal\u0131 yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131, siyasi f\u0259al Nadin Qordimer 1923-c\u00fc ild\u0259 anadan olub. Atas\u0131 y\u0259hudi \u0259silli immiqrant \u0130sidor Qordimer Litvada, anas\u0131 Hannah Myers Qordimer is\u0259 Londanda d\u00fcnyaya g\u00f6z a\u00e7\u0131b v\u0259 C\u0259nubi Afrikada tan\u0131\u015f olaraq, ail\u0259 qurublar. \u018fd\u0259bi u\u011furlar\u0131 Avropaya g\u0259li\u015fi il\u0259 ba\u015flayan yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 1991-ci ild\u0259 \u201c\u00f6z b\u0259nz\u0259rsiz eposu il\u0259 b\u0259\u015f\u0259riyy\u0259t\u0259 verdiyi faydaya g\u00f6r\u0259\u201d Nobel \u0259d\u0259biyyat m\u00fckafat\u0131na layiq g\u00f6r\u00fcl\u00fcb. Qormider\u00a0<\/span>\u201cYadellil\u0259rin torpa\u011f\u0131\u201d, \u201cT\u0259sad\u00fcfi sevgi\u201d, \u201cF\u0259xri Qonaq\u201d, \u201cM\u00fchafiz\u0259\u00e7i\u201d \u2013 (1974-c\u00fc ild\u0259 i\u015f\u0131q \u00fcz\u00fc g\u00f6rm\u00fc\u015f bu roman m\u00fc\u0259llif\u0259 \u201cMan Booker\u201d m\u00fckafat\u0131 qazand\u0131r\u0131b \u2013 red. E.S.) , \u201cBurgerin q\u0131z\u0131\u201d, \u201cO\u011flumun hekay\u0259si\u201d kimi romanlar\u0131n m\u00fc\u0259llifidir. Hekay\u0259 kitablar\u0131ndan is\u0259 \u201cAlt\u0131 fut torpaq\u201d, \u201cC\u00fcm\u0259nin izi\u201d, \u201cM\u0259xfidir\u201d, \u201cLivinqstonun yolda\u015flar\u0131\u201d, \u201cY\u0259qin ki, bazar ert\u0259si\u201d, \u201c\u018fsg\u0259rin a\u011fu\u015flar\u0131\u201d v\u0259 s. misal \u00e7\u0259km\u0259k olar. \u201c\u0130yul adamlar\u0131\u201d, \u201cT\u0259bi\u0259tin \u0259yl\u0259nc\u0259l\u0259ri\u201d, \u201cO\u011flumun hekay\u0259si\u201d\u00a0<\/b>romanlar\u0131nda v\u0259 \u201cN\u0259s\u0259, hardasa orda\u201d hekay\u0259l\u0259r toplusunda Qordimer h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259ki m\u00f6vzusuna \u2013 CAR-dak\u0131 h\u0259yat\u0131n probleml\u0259rin\u0259 sadiq qald\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6st\u0259rir. M\u00fcsahib\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259n birind\u0259 m\u00fc\u0259llif b\u00fct\u00fcn \u0259s\u0259rl\u0259rinin \u0259slind\u0259 el\u0259 yegan\u0259 bir kitabdan ibar\u0259t oldu\u011funu deyib. \u201cYan\u0131mda kims\u0259 yoxdur\u201d roman\u0131nda Qordimer \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc tan\u0131y\u0131b tapmaq ist\u0259y\u0259n Vera Stark adl\u0131 qad\u0131n\u0131n siyas\u0259t\u0259 h\u0259sr olunmu\u015f taleyini q\u0259l\u0259m\u0259 al\u0131b. 1999-cu ild\u0259 \u201c\u00dcmid i\u00e7ind\u0259 v\u0259 tarix i\u00e7ind\u0259 olan h\u0259yat: Bizim \u0259sr haqq\u0131nda qeydl\u0259r\u201d adl\u0131 kitab\u0131nda is\u0259 Qordimerin \u0259d\u0259biyyat, m\u0259d\u0259niyy\u0259t, insan haqlar\u0131 v\u0259 t\u0259bii ki, \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcn CAR-dak\u0131 i\u015fi v\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131 haqq\u0131nda m\u0259qal\u0259l\u0259ri, m\u00fchazir\u0259l\u0259ri i\u015f\u0131q \u00fcz\u00fc g\u00f6r\u00fcb. D\u00fcnyaca m\u0259\u015fhur yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 \u00f6t\u0259n il anadan oldu\u011fu Cohannesburqda d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259yi\u015fib. M\u00fc\u0259llifin \u201cThe Paris Review\u201d jurnal\u0131nda yay\u0131mlanm\u0131\u015f m\u00fcsahib\u0259sini t\u0259qdim edirik.<\/span>


Nadin Qordimerl\u0259 apard\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z m\u00fcsahib\u0259 iki hiss\u0259d\u0259n ibar\u0259tdir. M\u00fcsahib\u0259nin birinci hiss\u0259sini 1979-cu ilin pay\u0131z\u0131nda \u2013 \u0259dib \u201cBurgerin q\u0131z\u0131\u201d roman\u0131n\u0131n ictimai t\u0259qdimat\u0131 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn Amerikada olark\u0259n, ikinci hiss\u0259si is\u0259 1980-ci ilin yaz\u0131nda yen\u0259 Amerikada o\u011flunun m\u0259zuniyy\u0259tin\u0259 g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 haz\u0131rlan\u0131b.<\/span>
\u0130lk g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm\u00fcz \u201cVikinq N\u0259\u015friyyat\u0131\u201d-nda ba\u015f tutub. Na\u015firin ota\u011f\u0131n\u0131n yan\u0131nda bizim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn x\u00fcsusi otaq a\u00e7\u0131lm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Bu, \u0259ks\u0259r n\u0259\u015friyyatlarda oldu\u011fu kimi konfrans \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ayr\u0131lm\u0131\u015f, p\u0259nc\u0259r\u0259siz, kitablarla dolu otaq idi. \u0130kinci g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm\u00fcz oteld\u0259 oldu. Otaq rahat v\u0259 il\u0131q s\u00f6hb\u0259t \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn olduqca m\u00fcnasib olsa da, Qordimer eyni il\u0259 yazark\u0259n oldu\u011fu kimi, dan\u0131\u015fanda da s\u00f6zl\u0259ri bo\u015funa s\u0259rf etm\u0259kd\u0259n imtina etdi. H\u0259r iki g\u00f6r\u00fc\u015f\u00fcm\u00fczd\u0259 sanki saniy\u0259l\u0259ri say\u0131rm\u0131\u015f kimi qap\u0131dan aya\u011f\u0131m\u0131 i\u00e7\u0259ri basan kimi m\u00fcsahib\u0259y\u0259 d\u0259rhal ba\u015flama\u011fa haz\u0131r oldu\u011funu n\u00fcmayi\u015f etdirdi, biz\u0259 t\u0259klif etdiyi vaxt yax\u0131nla\u015fanda is\u0259 art\u0131q dan\u0131\u015fmaq ist\u0259m\u0259diyini, vaxt\u0131n bitdiyini a\u00e7\u0131q-a\u015fkar bildirdi. Zehni ayd\u0131nl\u0131q v\u0259 diqq\u0259tin m\u0259rk\u0259zl\u0259\u015fm\u0259si o q\u0259d\u0259r g\u00fccl\u00fcd\u00fcr ki, \u0259sla m\u00f6vzudan v\u0259 sualdan k\u0259nara \u00e7\u0131xm\u0131r, q\u0131sa zaman \u0259rzind\u0259 m\u00fcmk\u00fcn ola bil\u0259c\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r \u00e7ox v\u0259 laz\u0131ml\u0131 m\u0259lumat\u0131 verir.<\/span>
Z\u0259rif, inc\u0259 s\u0259sli, yum\u015faq dan\u0131\u015fan, davran\u0131\u015flar\u0131nda s\u00fcr\u0259t v\u0259 inc\u0259liyi m\u00fck\u0259mm\u0259l formada uzla\u015fd\u0131rm\u0131\u015f, bax\u0131\u015flar\u0131ndan beyninin daim n\u0259 is\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fc, n\u0259s\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259diyini ayd\u0131nca g\u00f6r\u0259 bil\u0259c\u0259yiniz xan\u0131md\u0131r Nadin. B\u0259z\u0259n insana el\u0259 g\u0259lir ki, o, q\u0131rx ild\u0259n \u00e7oxdur ki, sad\u0259c\u0259 d\u00fcny\u0259vi ehtiraslar\u0131ndan ar\u0131nmaq, daxilini s\u00fczg\u0259cd\u0259n ke\u00e7irm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn yaz\u0131r. Lakin C\u0259nubi Afrikadan olanlara xas bu enerji, h\u0259r t\u0259r\u0259fd\u0259n says\u0131z-hesabs\u0131z maraq v\u0259 h\u0259r g\u00fcn yeni bir h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259 tutulmu\u015f olmas\u0131 h\u0259qiq\u0259tini d\u0259 d\u0259rk edir.<\/span>

– C\u0259nubi Afrikada f\u0259sill\u0259rin f\u0259rqi varm\u0131, yoxsa el\u0259 b\u00fct\u00fcn il boyu hava istidir?<\/b>
– Yox, \u0259lb\u0259tt\u0259 ki, f\u0259sill\u0259r se\u00e7ilir, hiss olunur. Yaln\u0131z ekvatora yax\u0131n \u0259razil\u0259rd\u0259 bu f\u0259rq \u00e7ox c\u00fczidir, y\u0259ni orada hava ad\u0259t\u0259n d\u0259yi\u015fmir. Ancaq qit\u0259nin lap sonunda bir yerd\u0259 olsaq v\u0259 \u0259n yuxar\u0131 yerin\u0259, m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, m\u0259nim ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m Cohannasburqa qalxsaq, tamamil\u0259 bir-birind\u0259n f\u0259rqli iqliml\u0259rd\u0259n ke\u00e7\u0259c\u0259ksiniz. Olduqca s\u0259rt v\u0259 k\u0259skin soyuqlarla m\u00fc\u015fayi\u0259t olunan q\u0131\u015f f\u0259sli olur Afrikada. Qar olmur, baxsan\u0131z, el\u0259 bil\u0259rsiniz pay\u0131zd\u0131r, ya da yaz\u0131n \u0259vv\u0259ll\u0259ridir, t\u0259miz, g\u00fcn\u0259\u015fli havalar olur, amma gec\u0259l\u0259r \u015faxta insan\u0131 \u00f6ld\u00fcr\u00fcr. Afrikan\u0131n x\u00fcsusi, ya\u011f\u0131\u015fl\u0131 m\u00f6vs\u00fcm\u00fc var. H\u0259min \u0259r\u0259f\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259 durmadan ya\u011f\u0131\u015f ya\u011f\u0131r. Lakin ilin yar\u0131s\u0131ndan \u00e7oxunu g\u00f6yd\u0259n bir damc\u0131 bel\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fcr, h\u0259tta q\u0131\u015fda da. H\u0259tta b\u0259z\u0259n bu m\u00fcdd\u0259t o q\u0259d\u0259r uzan\u0131r ki, ya\u011f\u0131\u015f\u0131n oldu\u011funu bel\u0259 yad\u0131r\u011fay\u0131r insan. Bir s\u0259h\u0259r g\u00f6zl\u0259rinizi a\u00e7\u0131b, havada ya\u011f\u0131\u015fdan doyma\u011fa \u00e7al\u0131\u015fan torpa\u011f\u0131n iyisini almaq el\u0259 m\u00f6ht\u0259\u015f\u0259m duy\u011fudur ki… K\u00f6hn\u0259 tikili evl\u0259rin \u00e7oxu, bizimki kimi, d\u0259mir v\u0259 ya qalayla \u00f6rt\u00fcl\u00fc olur. M\u00f6hk\u0259m ya\u011f\u0131\u015f, dolu d\u00fc\u015f\u0259nd\u0259 t\u0259s\u0259vv\u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fczd\u0259 bunun evin i\u00e7ind\u0259 nec\u0259 s\u0259sl\u0259ndiyini \u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fcz canland\u0131r\u0131n, el\u0259 bil b\u00f6y\u00fck ilx\u0131 d\u00f6rtnala \u00e7ap\u0131r. B\u00f6y\u00fcd\u00fcy\u00fcm evin qalaydan dam\u0131 vard\u0131, yata\u011f\u0131ma uzan\u0131b, ya\u011f\u0131\u015f\u0131n s\u0259sini dinl\u0259m\u0259k u\u015faql\u0131\u011f\u0131ma aid ilk xatir\u0259l\u0259rimd\u0259ndir.<\/span>

– \u0130lk d\u0259f\u0259 n\u0259 zaman C\u0259nubi Afrikadan k\u0259nara \u00e7\u0131xd\u0131n\u0131z?<\/b>
– O vaxtlar Rodeziya idi, indiki Zimbabve, ilk d\u0259f\u0259 ora s\u0259f\u0259r etmi\u015f\u0259m. Ola bil\u0259r ki, bu iki \u00f6lk\u0259 t\u0259s\u0259vv\u00fcr\u00fcn\u00fczd\u0259 eyni yer kimi canlan\u0131r, amma deyil. Zimbabve M\u0259rk\u0259zi Afrikada yerl\u0259\u015fir, subtropik \u00f6lk\u0259dir, h\u0259tta bir az tropik\u0259 yax\u0131n. Amma \u00f6z\u00fcm \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ilk s\u0259yah\u0259t xarakterli gedi\u015fim 30 ya\u015f\u0131mda olub, art\u0131q iki kitab\u0131m \u00e7ap olunmu\u015fdu. \u0130ngilt\u0259r\u0259 v\u0259 Amerikaya d\u0259v\u0259t alm\u0131\u015fd\u0131m, n\u0259d\u0259ns\u0259 yolumu Misird\u0259n sald\u0131m. B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259, bu mar\u015frut daha s\u0259rf\u0259li idi. Misir s\u0259yah\u0259t etdiyim ilk \u00f6lk\u0259 oldu. Londonda \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc do\u011fma yerd\u0259, evimd\u0259ymi\u015f\u0259m kimi hiss etdim, lakin bu n\u0259s\u0259 qeyri-real yolla yaranm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Sonralar anlad\u0131m ki, Londonu m\u0259n\u0259 bu q\u0259d\u0259r do\u011fmala\u015fd\u0131ran Dikensin v\u0259 Virciniya Vulfun \u0259s\u0259rl\u0259rind\u0259 oxuyub, beynimd\u0259 canland\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131m \u015f\u0259kildir. Bu iki yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 m\u0259n\u0259 \u0130ngilt\u0259r\u0259 h\u0259yat\u0131n\u0131n h\u0259r \u015feyini m\u0259nims\u0259tmi\u015fdi, sanki yerimi tapm\u0131\u015f kimi hiss edirdim. Orvel kimi yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131lar ad\u0259t\u0259n yer\u0259 ba\u011fl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00fccl\u00fc olmayanlard\u0131r. Amma Vulf v\u0259 Dikensd\u0259 bu duy\u011fu g\u00fccl\u00fcd\u00fcr. Sonralar \u00c7elsid\u0259 g\u0259z\u0259nd\u0259 g\u00f6rd\u00fcm ki, bura h\u0259qiq\u0259t\u0259n d\u0259 Dalloveyin v\u0259t\u0259nidir, yaln\u0131z m\u0259kana v\u0259 yer\u0259 ba\u011fl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131 g\u00fccl\u00fc olanlar onu bu q\u0259d\u0259r m\u00fck\u0259mm\u0259l v\u0259 ayd\u0131n t\u0259svir ed\u0259 bil\u0259r.<\/span>

– \u201cF\u0259xri qonaq\u201d (\u201cA guest of honour\u201d) roman\u0131n\u0131n q\u0259hr\u0259man\u0131 Rebeka kimi siz d\u0259 Afrika qit\u0259sind\u0259n k\u0259narda bir h\u0259yata haz\u0131r deyildiniz?<\/b>
– Yox, iyirmi ild\u0259n \u00e7ox \u0130ngilt\u0259r\u0259y\u0259 ged\u0259 bilm\u0259y\u0259n anam m\u0259ni bu s\u0259yah\u0259t\u0259 \u00e7ox yax\u015f\u0131 haz\u0131rlam\u0131\u015fd\u0131. M\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u00e7oxlu yun alt paltar\u0131 v\u0259 n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r laz\u0131ms\u0131z \u015fey y\u0131\u011fm\u0131\u015fd\u0131, g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259n sonra ham\u0131s\u0131n\u0131 r\u0259dd el\u0259dim. Rebekkan\u0131n \u0130s\u00e7ve\u00e7r\u0259y\u0259 s\u0259f\u0259ri is\u0259… Bilirsiniz, m\u0259n n\u0259s\u0259 bu q\u0259na\u0259t\u0259 g\u0259lmi\u015f\u0259m ki, bu son d\u00f6vrl\u0259rd\u0259 yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131lar q\u0259hr\u0259man\u0131n havadan v\u0259 yeni bir \u00f6lk\u0259d\u0259n ald\u0131\u011f\u0131 t\u0259\u0259ss\u00fcrat\u0131 g\u0259r\u0259k d\u0259qiq v\u0259 ehtiyatl\u0131 t\u0259svir etsin. Eyni il\u0259 XIX \u0259sr \u0259d\u0259biyyat\u0131nda qatarla edil\u0259n s\u0259f\u0259rl\u0259rin t\u0259svirind\u0259ki kimi qeyri-d\u0259qiqlik, s\u00fcnilik hiss olunmas\u0131n. Sonralar qatarla s\u0259yah\u0259t ed\u0259nd\u0259n \u0259slind\u0259 n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r f\u0259rqli duy\u011fular ya\u015fad\u0131m. S\u0259yah\u0259t m\u0259nim al\u0259mimd\u0259 insana daxili d\u0259yi\u015fiklik ya\u015fadan bir \u015feydir, \u00fcst\u0259lik bug\u00fcn s\u0259yah\u0259t dey\u0259nd\u0259 ham\u0131n\u0131n a\u011fl\u0131na \u201ct\u0259yyar\u0259\u201d g\u0259lirs\u0259, t\u0259svir m\u00fctl\u0259q d\u00f6vrl\u0259 s\u0259sl\u0259\u015fm\u0259lidir.\u00a0<\/span>

– \u0130ngilt\u0259r\u0259y\u0259 edil\u0259n o s\u0259yah\u0259t \u201csoyk\u00f6k\u0259 qay\u0131d\u0131\u015f\u201d ekspedisiyas\u0131 adlana bil\u0259rmi?<\/b>
– Yox. Amma o s\u0259yah\u0259t m\u0259n\u0259 kim oldu\u011fumu, n\u0259l\u0259rin c\u0259mi oldu\u011fumu k\u0259\u015ff etm\u0259k imkan\u0131 verdi, koloniyala\u015fma qurban\u0131 b\u00fct\u00fcn nailiyy\u0259tl\u0259rini s\u0259rgil\u0259di. Koloniyal\u0131 oldu\u011fumu bilmirdim, hiss etmirdim, lakin bunu sonradan tam m\u0259\u011fzi il\u0259 anlad\u0131m. Baxmayaraq ki, anam C\u0259nubi Afrikaya g\u0259l\u0259nd\u0259 h\u0259l\u0259 alt\u0131 ya\u015f\u0131nda olub, h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 \u0130ngilt\u0259r\u0259d\u0259n v\u0259 ya g\u0259l\u0259c\u0259k planlar\u0131ndan dan\u0131\u015fanda \u201cevin\u0259 geri d\u00f6nm\u0259k\u201d ist\u0259diyini deyirdi. Amma o ilk s\u0259f\u0259rd\u0259n sonra m\u0259n . V\u0259 d\u00fcnyada ba\u015fqa bir yer ev ola bilm\u0259zdi.<\/span>

– Valideynl\u0259riniz C\u0259nubi Afrikaya niy\u0259 g\u0259lmi\u015fdi?<\/b>
– \u0130kisini d\u0259 buraya g\u0259tir\u0259n s\u0259b\u0259b eynidir, m\u00fcst\u0259ml\u0259k\u0259 geni\u015fl\u0259ndirilm\u0259sinin t\u0259rkibin\u0259 daxil edil\u0259n ail\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259 do\u011fulublar. Babam h\u0259rb\u00e7i olub, 1890-c\u0131 ill\u0259rd\u0259 iki qarda\u015f\u0131 il\u0259 birg\u0259 m\u00fcxt\u0259lif yerl\u0259rd\u0259 ged\u0259n m\u00fcharib\u0259l\u0259rin i\u015ftirak\u00e7\u0131s\u0131 olublar. Afrika avropal\u0131lar \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn geni\u015f imkanlar torpa\u011f\u0131 hesab edildiyind\u0259n burada daha \u00e7ox ingilis h\u0259rb\u00e7il\u0259rin ail\u0259l\u0259ri m\u0259skunla\u015f\u0131b. Amma atam\u0131n k\u00f6\u00e7 hekay\u0259si bu q\u0259d\u0259r sad\u0259 v\u0259 xo\u015fb\u0259xt deyil. O, Litvada anadan olub, h\u0259min d\u00f6vrl\u0259r is\u0259 y\u0259hudil\u0259rin k\u00fctl\u0259vi \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 d\u00fcnya \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn t\u0259hl\u00fck\u0259 m\u0259nb\u0259yi hesab edildikl\u0259ri v\u0259 h\u0259r \u015feyd\u0259n m\u0259hrum qald\u0131qlar\u0131 zamanlar olub. Babam is\u0259 12 u\u015faql\u0131 ail\u0259y\u0259 baxa bilm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259k q\u0259d\u0259r kas\u0131b olub. Atam oxumaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u00e7ox \u00e7al\u0131\u015fsa da, y\u0259hudi u\u015faqlar bu imkanlardan da m\u0259hrum burax\u0131l\u0131blar. N\u0259hay\u0259t, atam 12-13 ya\u015f\u0131 olanda d\u00fcnyan\u0131n haras\u0131 olursa, olsun getm\u0259k ist\u0259diyin\u0259 q\u0259rar verir. Bel\u0259c\u0259, 13 ya\u015fl\u0131 balaca o\u011flan Amerikaya getm\u0259k ad\u0131 il\u0259 g\u0259miy\u0259 minir v\u0259 Afrikaya g\u0259lir, b\u0259li, bel\u0259 qeyri-adi hekay\u0259. B\u00fct\u00fcn mac\u0259ralar ba\u015f\u0131na g\u0259ls\u0259 d\u0259, he\u00e7 mac\u0259rap\u0259r\u0259st, m\u00f6hk\u0259m xarakterli adam deyildi, utancaq idi. H\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn mistik adam kimi qal\u0131r, h\u0259mi\u015f\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fc \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn s\u0259ssiz yerl\u0259r axtar\u0131rd\u0131, \u015f\u0259xsiyy\u0259t olmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn he\u00e7 n\u0259 el\u0259m\u0259mi\u015fdi, sanki \u00f6z\u00fc il\u0259 ba\u011fl\u0131 h\u0259bs etdiyi \u015feyl\u0259r vard\u0131.<\/span>

– Orada m\u0259kt\u0259bl\u0259r nec\u0259 idi?<\/b>
– Dem\u0259li, bel\u0259, etiraf edim ki, formal t\u0259hsil ald\u0131m, y\u0259ni ora \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn kafi olacaq q\u0259d\u0259r oxudum. Amma \u00e7ox maraql\u0131 u\u015faql\u0131\u011f\u0131m olub. Ail\u0259d\u0259 iki u\u015faq idik, m\u0259nd\u0259n b\u00f6y\u00fck bac\u0131m var. B\u00f6y\u00fck bac\u0131m\u0131n kuklas\u0131, sevimlisi, evin \u0259rk\u00f6y\u00fcn\u00fc idim. Ona g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 \u00e7ox h\u0259ddinibilm\u0259z u\u015faq oldum. Amma ola bil\u0259r ki, bu bir az da enerji bollu\u011fundan ir\u0259li g\u0259lirdi, onu \u00e7\u0131xara, dinc\u0259l\u0259 bilmirdim. Odur ki, r\u0259qs\u0259 meyll\u0259ndim, d\u00f6rd ya\u015f\u0131mdan on ya\u015f\u0131ma kimi r\u0259qsl\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful oldum. H\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 o ill\u0259rd\u0259 b\u0259d\u0259nimi o formada oynatma\u011f\u0131n verdiyi z\u00f6vq\u00fc xat\u0131rlad\u0131qca h\u0259zz al\u0131ram. Ham\u0131 birm\u0259nal\u0131 \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 m\u0259nim r\u0259qqas olaca\u011f\u0131m\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrd\u00fc, lakin on ya\u015f\u0131mda anid\u0259n \u00f6l\u00fcmc\u00fcl v\u0259ziyy\u0259t\u0259 d\u00fc\u015fd\u00fcm, n\u0259f\u0259sim k\u0259sildi. \u018fslind\u0259 s\u0131sqa olsam da, olduqca sa\u011flam u\u015faq idim. Odur ki, he\u00e7 kim bu hadis\u0259y\u0259 el\u0259 d\u0259 diqq\u0259t ay\u0131rmad\u0131. Bu hal bir daha t\u0259krarland\u0131qdan sonra atam h\u0259kim\u0259 apard\u0131 v\u0259 \u00fcr\u0259yimd\u0259 ciddi problem oldu\u011fu ayd\u0131nla\u015fd\u0131. \u00dcr\u0259yim olduqca s\u00fcr\u0259tli d\u00f6y\u00fcnd\u00fcy\u00fcnd\u0259n s\u0259rt v\u0259 s\u00fcr\u0259tli h\u0259r\u0259k\u0259tl\u0259r qada\u011fan olundu. H\u0259kim eynil\u0259 bunlar\u0131 dedi: \u201cBu u\u015fa\u011fa h\u0259r hans\u0131sa fiziki m\u0259\u015fq, tennis oynamaq, qa\u00e7maq, r\u0259qs etm\u0259k, h\u0259tta \u00fczm\u0259k d\u0259 qada\u011fand\u0131r\u201d. Bel\u0259c\u0259, \u0259n \u00e7ox sevdiyim m\u0259\u015f\u011fuliyy\u0259t\u0259 – r\u0259qs\u0259 son qoydum, bu m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn qorxunc d\u0259yi\u015fiklik oldu. 11 ya\u015f\u0131mda is\u0259 anam m\u0259ni tamamil\u0259 m\u0259kt\u0259bd\u0259n ay\u0131rd\u0131. Hardasa bir il m\u0259kt\u0259bd\u0259n d\u0259, t\u0259hsild\u0259n d\u0259 uzaq qald\u0131m. B\u00fct\u00fcn diqq\u0259tim qira\u0259t\u0259 y\u00f6n\u0259ldi, v\u0259h\u015fi kimi oxuyurdum. Bir m\u00fcdd\u0259t sonra tamamil\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcn\u0259qapal\u0131 u\u015faq oldum. Anam b\u00fct\u00fcn t\u0259bi\u0259timi v\u0259 xarakterimi d\u0259yi\u015fdirdi. Sonra m\u0259n\u0259 x\u00fcsusi m\u00fc\u0259llim tutdu, g\u00fcnd\u0259 \u00fc\u00e7 saat onun yan\u0131na apar\u0131rd\u0131. Amma orada da yaln\u0131z olurdum, g\u00fcnd\u0259lik d\u0259rsl\u0259ri i\u015fl\u0259yir, bir st\u0259kan s\u00fcd i\u00e7ib ev\u0259 g\u0259lirdim. Zamanla ya\u015f\u0131dlar\u0131mla kontakt\u0131m tamamil\u0259 k\u0259sildi. 16 ya\u015f\u0131na kimi ancaq anam\u0131n h\u0259mya\u015f\u0131dlar\u0131n\u0131n \u0259hat\u0259sind\u0259 b\u00f6y\u00fcd\u00fcm, baxmayaraq ki, onlarla da \u0259laq\u0259 qurmurdum. Bir s\u00f6zl\u0259 balaca qad\u0131n idim.<\/span>

– B\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259, u\u015faql\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131zda izolyasiya edilm\u0259yiniz yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 olma\u011f\u0131n\u0131z\u0131n \u0259sas s\u0259b\u0259bi olu, \u00e7\u00fcnki zaman\u0131n\u0131z\u0131n \u00e7oxunu qira\u0259t\u0259 s\u0259rf etmisiniz, yaln\u0131z qalm\u0131s\u0131n\u0131z.<\/b>
– B\u0259li… b\u0259lk\u0259 d\u0259 m\u0259n m\u00fctl\u0259q hans\u0131sa bir yolla yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 olacaqd\u0131m. \u00c7\u00fcnki x\u0259st\u0259liyim a\u015fkarlanmam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m \u0259vv\u0259l d\u0259 bu yaz\u0131 i\u015fl\u0259rin\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259sim vard\u0131. \u00c7\u00fcnki jurnalist olma\u011f\u0131 da \u0259n az r\u0259qqas\u0259 olmaq q\u0259d\u0259r \u00e7ox arzulay\u0131rd\u0131m. Bilirsiniz, jurnalistikaya m\u0259nd\u0259 h\u0259v\u0259s hardan yarand\u0131? Hardasa 11 ya\u015f\u0131m vard\u0131, Evelin Vauqun \u201cScoop\u201d jurnal\u0131n\u0131 oxuya-oxuya. El\u0259 onu oxumaq kimis\u0259 jurnalistikaya h\u0259v\u0259sl\u0259ndirm\u0259k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn kifay\u0259t edirdi. Ona heyran idim. Qira\u0259tl\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful olmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn zaman\u0131m bol idi v\u0259 t\u0259bii ki, \u00e7ox oxuyurdum, amma m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259 onda idi ki, se\u00e7im etm\u0259d\u0259n, diskriminasiyas\u0131z oxuyurdum. Kitabxanaya gedib, maraql\u0131 g\u00f6zl\u0259rl\u0259 r\u0259fl\u0259ri izl\u0259yirdim, sonra h\u0259r hans\u0131sa bir kitabda dayan\u0131rd\u0131m. Amma n\u0259s\u0259 h\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcr\u0259m ki, bu \u0259n yax\u015f\u0131 \u00fcsuldur.<\/span>

– \u0130lk kitab\u0131n\u0131z n\u0259\u015fr olunmam\u0131\u015fdan \u0259vv\u0259l hekay\u0259l\u0259rin \u201cThe New -Yorker\u201dd\u0259 d\u0259rc olunurdu?<\/b>
– Xeyr. Hekay\u0259l\u0259rim ilk d\u0259f\u0259 1949-cu ild\u0259 CAR-da hekay\u0259 toplusu kimi d\u0259rc olunub. \u201cThe New -Yorker\u201dd\u0259 ilk hekay\u0259m d\u0259rc olunanda harda 26 ya\u015f\u0131nda olmal\u0131yd\u0131m. Bir hekay\u0259m orada d\u0259rc olundu, bir ne\u00e7\u0259si d\u0259 \u201cVirginia Quarterly Review\u201d, \u201cYale Review\u201d kimi g\u0259cn yazarlar\u0131n yarad\u0131c\u0131l\u0131q yolunda \u0259n\u0259n\u0259vi m\u0259rh\u0259l\u0259 olan jurnallarda. 50-ci ill\u0259rd\u0259 b\u00fct\u00fcn g\u0259nc yazarlar h\u00fcn\u0259rl\u0259rini bu jurnallardak\u0131 yaz\u0131larla g\u00f6st\u0259rirdi. Sonra is\u0259 q\u0131sa hekay\u0259l\u0259rd\u0259n ibar\u0259t ilk kitab\u0131m i\u015f\u0131q \u00fcz\u00fc g\u00f6rd\u00fc.<\/span>

– \u018flyazmalar\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 bu jurnallara g\u00f6nd\u0259rirdiniz?<\/b>
– Yox, yox… H\u0259l\u0259 o vaxtdan m\u0259n \u0259d\u0259bi agentl\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259yirdim. Bu, \u201cThe New -Yorker\u201d-d\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259y\u0259n \u0259d\u0259bi agent vasiut\u0259sil\u0259 ba\u015f tutdu. \u00c7\u00fcnki o zamanlar m\u0259n Amerika n\u0259\u015friyyatlar\u0131ndan, ya da m\u0259tbuat n\u00fcmay\u0259nd\u0259l\u0259rind\u0259n he\u00e7 kimi tan\u0131m\u0131rd\u0131m, odur ki, bu jurnallar\u0131n he\u00e7 birin\u0259 bax\u0131b, b\u0259y\u0259nib, d\u0259rc etsinl\u0259r dey\u0259, yaz\u0131 g\u00f6nd\u0259rm\u0259mi\u015f\u0259m. \u0130ngilt\u0259r\u0259d\u0259ki n\u0259\u015friyyatlar\u0131n b\u0259zil\u0259rind\u0259 tan\u0131d\u0131qlar\u0131m var idi. O vaxt na\u015firl\u0259r \u0259d\u0259bi biliyi d\u0259rin adamlar olurdu, y\u0259ni na\u015firlik s\u0131rf biznes sah\u0259si deyildi, \u0259d\u0259bi jurnallar\u0131, yeni imzalar\u0131 m\u00fct\u0259madi izl\u0259yirdil\u0259r. \u0130lk n\u0259\u015friyyat\u0131m \u201cSimon&Schuster\u201d-in na\u015firi d\u0259 \u201cThe New -Yorker\u201d-d\u0259 d\u0259rc olunan hekay\u0259md\u0259n sonra m\u0259niml\u0259 maraqlanm\u0131\u015fd\u0131. Sonra \u201cThe New -Yorker\u201d-in kollektivi il\u0259 tan\u0131\u015f oldum, ilk \u0259d\u0259bi redaktorum v\u0259 jurnaldak\u0131 yax\u0131n dostum Katerina Uayt oldu.\u00a0<\/span>

– \u0130lk \u0259d\u0259bi agentiniz kim idi?<\/b>
– D\u00fcnyan\u0131n \u0259n q\u0259rib\u0259 adamlar\u0131ndan biri \u2013 Sidnet Satersteyn. Yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131lara qar\u015f\u0131 inan\u0131lmaz d\u0259rin m\u0259h\u0259bb\u0259t b\u0259sl\u0259y\u0259n, z\u0259ngin insan idi. Onun \u00f6vlad\u0131 yox idi, adama el\u0259 g\u0259lirdi ki, b\u00fct\u00fcn g\u0259nc yazarlar onun \u00f6vlad\u0131d\u0131r. El\u0259 \u00e7ox yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 il\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259mirdi, \u00e7\u00fcnki \u0259d\u0259bi agentlik onun prinsipial \u015f\u0259kild\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful oldu\u011fu i\u015f deyildi. B\u00f6y\u00fck \u00fcr\u0259k v\u0259 m\u00fck\u0259mm\u0259l z\u00f6vq sahibi insan idi. B\u0259db\u0259xtlikd\u0259n, tan\u0131nma\u011fa v\u0259 u\u011fur qazanma\u011fa t\u0259z\u0259-t\u0259z\u0259 ba\u015flad\u0131\u011f\u0131m bir vaxtda \u0259n yax\u0131n adam\u0131m\u0131 itirdim, \u00fcr\u0259k \u00e7at\u0131\u015fmazl\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan d\u00fcnyas\u0131n\u0131 d\u0259yi\u015fdi. O, h\u0259r \u015feyin yax\u015f\u0131s\u0131na layiq adam idi.\u00a0<\/span>

– Virciniya Vulfun yarad\u0131c\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131z\u0131n ilk ill\u0259rind\u0259 yazd\u0131qlar\u0131n\u0131z \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 t\u0259siri var idi?<\/b>
– M\u0259nc\u0259, h\u0259 dem\u0259k olar. X\u00fcsusil\u0259 d\u0259, ilk be\u015f il \u0259rzind\u0259. H\u0259r g\u0259nc yazar \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 g\u00fccl\u00fc t\u0259siri olacaq yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131d\u0131r. Onun ritmin\u0259, \u00fcslubuna d\u00fc\u015fm\u0259k \u00e7ox asand\u0131r. Amma \u0259sla m\u00f6vzu eyniliyi olmay\u0131b. Eyni \u015fey m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, Dos Pasos, yaxud da Heminquey kimi yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131lar t\u0259r\u0259find\u0259n, amma tamamil\u0259 f\u0259rqli formada i\u015fl\u0259n\u0259 bil\u0259r.<\/span>

– \u201cBurgerin q\u0131z\u0131\u201d n\u0259\u015fr olunduqdan c\u0259mi \u00fc\u00e7 h\u0259ft\u0259 sonra qada\u011fan olundu, do\u011frudurmu?<\/b>
– B\u0259li. H\u0259tta bir ne\u00e7\u0259 ay qada\u011fan olunmu\u015f kitablar siyah\u0131s\u0131nda qald\u0131. Sonra qada\u011fa qald\u0131r\u0131ld\u0131. T\u0259s\u0259vv\u00fcr edin d\u0259, bu x\u0259b\u0259r m\u0259ni n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r sevindirdi. H\u0259min kitabda m\u0259n h\u0259qiq\u0259ti \u0259ks etdir\u0259n bir s\u0259n\u0259di a\u00e7\u0131qlam\u0131\u015fd\u0131m. Bu kitab \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259ki qada\u011fan\u0131n qald\u0131r\u0131lmas\u0131n\u0131 t\u0259kc\u0259 \u00f6z\u00fcm\u0259 g\u00f6r\u0259 yox, m\u0259nd\u0259n sonrak\u0131 yazarlar\u0131n da c\u0259sar\u0259tinin q\u0131r\u0131lmamas\u0131 \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn ist\u0259yirdim.\u00a0<\/span>

– Nec\u0259 oldu ki, qada\u011fa qald\u0131r\u0131ld\u0131?<\/b>
– M\u0259n art\u0131q xaricd\u0259 tan\u0131nan, oxunan, t\u0259l\u0259b g\u00f6r\u0259n yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 idim. M\u0259nim kitab\u0131ma hans\u0131sa absurd s\u0259b\u0259bd\u0259n qada\u011fa qoyulmas\u0131 y\u00fcks\u0259k dair\u0259l\u0259rin d\u0259 diqq\u0259tini \u00e7\u0259kmi\u015f, kitab\u0131 bird\u0259n-bir\u0259 maraq m\u0259rk\u0259zin\u0259 \u00e7evirmi\u015fdi. Bel\u0259 davam el\u0259m\u0259k axmaql\u0131q olard\u0131.\u00a0<\/span>

– Kitab qada\u011fas\u0131 bel\u0259 adi \u015feydir?<\/b>
– Yox, el\u0259 tez-tez t\u0259krarlanm\u0131r. \u018fvv\u0259ll\u0259r d\u0259 m\u0259nim iki kitab\u0131m \u2013 \u201cYadellil\u0259rin torpa\u011f\u0131\u201d (\u201cA World of Strangers\u201d) 12 il qada\u011fan olundu, \u201cGecikmi\u015f burjua d\u00fcnyas\u0131\u201d (\u201cThe Late Bourgeois World\u201d) is\u0259 hardasa 10 il qada\u011fan olunmu\u015f kitablar siyah\u0131s\u0131ndan \u00e7\u0131xa bilm\u0259di. Amma \u0259sas m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259 o idi ki, sonra qada\u011falar qalxanda, bir \u00e7ox \u0259s\u0259r kimi art\u0131q \u00f6lm\u00fc\u015f \u0259s\u0259r deyildi.\u00a0<\/span>

– Yazma\u011fa, daha do\u011frusu, yeni bir romana ba\u015flamazdan \u0259vv\u0259l haz\u0131rl\u0131q \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r vaxt laz\u0131m olur?<\/b>
– Bunu d\u0259qiqliyi il\u0259 dem\u0259k \u00e7\u0259tindir ax\u0131, m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259n, Roza xarakterini yaratmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn laz\u0131m olan q\u0259hr\u0259man\u0131 ill\u0259rl\u0259 g\u00f6zl\u0259dim. Bilirdim ki, o adam\u0131 tapa bilm\u0259s\u0259m, m\u0259n Rozan\u0131 yarada bilm\u0259y\u0259c\u0259y\u0259m, ona g\u00f6r\u0259 d\u0259 \u0259s\u0259r ba\u015flam\u0131rd\u0131m.<\/span>

– Dindar insans\u0131n\u0131z, mistikaya inan\u0131rs\u0131n\u0131z?<\/b>
– M\u0259n ateist\u0259m. H\u0259tta \u00f6z\u00fcm\u00fc aqnostik bel\u0259 adland\u0131rmazd\u0131m, tamamil\u0259 ateist.<\/span>

– Yazmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn hans\u0131 \u015f\u0259raiti \u0259lveri\u015fli hesab edirsiniz?<\/b>
– X\u00fcsusi bir yer olma\u011f\u0131na ehtiyac yoxdur, b\u00f6y\u00fck olmayan rahat v\u0259 keyfiyy\u0259tli masa, qal\u0131n divarlarla \u00f6rt\u00fcl\u00fc otaq kifay\u0259tdir. H\u0259yat\u0131mda bir arzuolunmaz m\u0259rh\u0259l\u0259 var idi, \u0130lahi, k\u00f6rp\u0259 u\u015faqla bo\u015fanm\u0131\u015f bir qad\u0131n idim. G\u00fcc\u00fcm ancaq nazik divarla h\u00f6r\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f evd\u0259 ya\u015fama\u011fa \u00e7at\u0131rd\u0131, radiolar\u0131n s\u0259si m\u0259ni d\u0259li edirdi. H\u0259l\u0259 d\u0259 bu tip s\u0259sl\u0259r m\u0259ni \u00f6z\u00fcmd\u0259n \u00e7\u0131xar\u0131r. Adamlar\u0131n s\u0259s-k\u00fcy\u00fc vecim\u0259 d\u0259 olmur, amma radio-televiziya s\u0259si, ya da t\u0259krarlanan ah\u0259ngl\u0259r\u0259 d\u00f6z\u0259 bilmir\u0259m. \u0130ndi \u015f\u0259h\u0259rk\u0259nar\u0131 bir evd\u0259 ya\u015fay\u0131ram, balaca yaz\u0131 ota\u011f\u0131m var, qap\u0131s\u0131 birba\u015fa ba\u011f\u00e7aya a\u00e7\u0131l\u0131r \u2013 bu m\u0259nim \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u0259sl d\u0259bd\u0259b\u0259dir \u2013 bel\u0259c\u0259 kim\u0259s\u0259 hara gedib, hara g\u0259ldiyimi dem\u0259d\u0259n, girib-\u00e7\u0131xa bilir\u0259m. Yazma\u011fa ba\u015flamam\u0131\u015f b\u00fct\u00fcn telefonlar\u0131 s\u00f6nd\u00fcr\u00fcr\u0259m, g\u00fcn\u00fcn yaz\u0131s\u0131 bit\u0259nd\u0259 a\u00e7\u0131ram. \u018fg\u0259r kims\u0259 h\u0259qiq\u0259t\u0259n m\u0259ni m\u00fctl\u0259q g\u00f6rm\u0259k ist\u0259yirs\u0259, evimi tan\u0131y\u0131r, g\u0259l\u0259 bil\u0259r.\u00a0<\/span>

– Ad\u0259t\u0259n i\u015f saatlar\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 nec\u0259 t\u0259yin edirsiniz? X\u00fcsusi i\u015f g\u00fcnl\u0259riniz var, yoxsa h\u0259r g\u00fcn i\u015fl\u0259yirsiniz?<\/b>
– \u018fg\u0259r kitab \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 i\u015fl\u0259yir\u0259ms\u0259, h\u0259r g\u00fcn i\u015fl\u0259yir\u0259m. S\u0259h\u0259r oyanandan d\u00f6rd saat durmadan yaz\u0131ram, t\u0259bii ki, \u00e7ox yoruluram v\u0259 davam ed\u0259 bilmir\u0259m, he\u00e7 n\u0259 g\u0259lmir. D\u00f6rd saat sonra ba\u015fqa i\u015fl\u0259rl\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful oluram. B\u0259z\u0259n yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131lar deyir ki, yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 g\u0259r\u0259k g\u00fcnd\u0259lik, adi i\u015fl\u0259rl\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful olmas\u0131n, a\u00e7\u0131\u011f\u0131 bel\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u0259n adamlar\u0131 anlam\u0131ram. \u00c7\u00fcnki m\u0259nim al\u0259mimd\u0259 bunlar da vacib i\u015fl\u0259rdir. Yazma\u011f\u0131n g\u0259tirdiyi yaln\u0131zl\u0131q \u00fcrk\u00fcd\u00fcc\u00fcd\u00fcr, insan g\u0259r\u0259k h\u0259yat\u0131n davam etdiyini hiss el\u0259tdir\u0259n, onu o yaln\u0131zl\u0131qdan qoparan \u015feyl\u0259rl\u0259 d\u0259 m\u0259\u015f\u011ful olsun, yoxsa h\u0259yatla ba\u011f\u0131m\u0131z it\u0259r. Quru t\u0259mizl\u0259m\u0259y\u0259 gedirs\u0259n, a\u011faclar\u0131 sulay\u0131rsan, q\u0259hv\u0259 d\u0259ml\u0259yirs\u0259n, n\u0259s\u0259 bi\u015firirs\u0259n \u2013 d\u00fcnyaya geri d\u00f6n\u00fcrs\u0259n.<\/span>

– G\u00fcn\u00fcn x\u00fcsusil\u0259 m\u0259hsuldar olan hiss\u0259si varm\u0131?<\/b>
– S\u0259h\u0259rl\u0259r i\u015fl\u0259yir\u0259m. \u018fn m\u0259hsuldar vaxt s\u0259h\u0259r olur.<\/span>

– Ad\u0259t\u0259n bir kitab\u0131 tamamlamaq n\u0259 q\u0259d\u0259r vaxt\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 al\u0131r?<\/b>
– M\u00f6vzudan as\u0131l\u0131d\u0131r. \u018fn tez tamamlad\u0131\u011f\u0131m on s\u0259kkiz aya bitib. Sonuncunu d\u00f6rd il\u0259 yazm\u0131\u015fam.<\/span>

– Yarad\u0131c\u0131 t\u0131xac haqq\u0131nda n\u0259 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcrs\u00fcn\u00fcz? Sizin yaza bilm\u0259m\u0259k kimi probleminiz olur?<\/b>
– Yox.\u00a0<\/span>

– Yazd\u0131qlar\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 yoxlamaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u00e7ox vaxt itirirsiniz?<\/b>
– Zaman ke\u00e7dikc\u0259 daha az vaxt apar\u0131r. G\u0259nc olanda h\u0259r yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131 oxunmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn yekun variantana \u00e7atana kimi \u0259n az\u0131 \u00fc\u00e7 d\u0259f\u0259 k\u00f6\u00e7\u00fcr\u00fcrd\u00fcm. Amma dediyim kimi \u0259vv\u0259lll\u0259r bel\u0259 idi. Q\u0131sa hekay\u0259l\u0259r d\u00fcz\u0259li\u015f v\u0259rdi\u015fl\u0259rini formala\u015fd\u0131rmaq \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcn \u0259n yax\u015f\u0131 vasit\u0259dir, indi harayasa c\u0259mi bir d\u0259f\u0259 g\u00f6z g\u0259zdirm\u0259k kifay\u0259tdir ki, art\u0131q olan\u0131 pe\u015f\u0259karcas\u0131na k\u0259sib tullayasan.<\/span>

– T\u0259nqidi faydal\u0131 hesab edirsiniz?<\/b>
– B\u0259li. \u00c7\u00fcnki hadis\u0259 ba\u015f ver\u0259rk\u0259n bitmir, el\u0259 deyil? I\u015f sonrak\u0131 m\u0259rh\u0259l\u0259d\u0259 tamamil\u0259 bitmi\u015f hesab olunur. X\u00fcsusil\u0259 d\u0259, \u0259g\u0259r t\u0259nqid h\u0259d\u0259fi olan m\u0259s\u0259l\u0259ni m\u0259n \u00f6z beynimd\u0259 d\u0259 \u00e7\u0259k-\u00e7evir ed\u0259rk\u0259n i\u015f\u0131qlar onun \u00fcz\u0259rind\u0259 yan\u0131rsa, bu x\u00fcsusil\u0259 faydal\u0131 olur. Kitab\u0131n, hekay\u0259nin, roman\u0131n nec\u0259 olmal\u0131 oldu\u011fu il\u0259 ba\u011fl\u0131 Kafkan\u0131n \u00e7ox sevdiyim s\u00f6z\u00fc var:\u00a0<\/span>\u201c\u018fd\u0259bi n\u00fcmun\u0259 i\u00e7imizd\u0259k\u0131 buzlar\u0131 s\u0131nd\u0131r\u0131b, suyun axmas\u0131na imkan ver\u0259c\u0259k balta kimi olmal\u0131d\u0131r\u201d<\/b>

T\u0259rc\u00fcm\u0259 etdi:
\nElcan SALMANQIZI\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\n

kaspi.az<\/p>\n

Yaz\u0131ya 566 d\u0259f\u0259 bax\u0131l\u0131b<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0\u00a0C\u0259nubi Afrikal\u0131 yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131, siyasi f\u0259al Nadin Qordimer 1923-c\u00fc ild\u0259 anadan olub. Atas\u0131 y\u0259hudi \u0259silli immiqrant \u0130sidor Qordimer Litvada, anas\u0131 Hannah Myers Qordimer is\u0259 Londanda d\u00fcnyaya g\u00f6z a\u00e7\u0131b v\u0259 C\u0259nubi Afrikada tan\u0131\u015f olaraq, ail\u0259 qurublar. \u018fd\u0259bi u\u011furlar\u0131 Avropaya g\u0259li\u015fi il\u0259 ba\u015flayan yaz\u0131\u00e7\u0131 1991-ci ild\u0259 \u201c\u00f6z b\u0259nz\u0259rsiz eposu il\u0259 b\u0259\u015f\u0259riyy\u0259t\u0259 verdiyi faydaya g\u00f6r\u0259\u201d Nobel \u0259d\u0259biyyat m\u00fckafat\u0131na layiq […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[18],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8428"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=8428"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8428\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8430,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8428\/revisions\/8430"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=8428"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=8428"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/kultur.az\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=8428"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}